The Secrets We Keep
by SexinSatin
Summary: An undercover op brings to light the feelings between Gibbs and Ziva. Limits will be tested. Hiding in plain sight is never an easy thing. Gibbs/Ziva pairing. Rated Fiction MA based on new guidelines
1. Secrets

Gibbs was waiting, and for once he wasn't annoyed to be kept waiting. A call from his friend Cal was always welcome. Grabbing a beer at the local bar had been a regular thing for them up until 2 months ago. Lately they'd both been too busy but, Gibbs was definitely in need of some down time.

When he saw Cal enter the bar he knew something was wrong. The man looked as lighthearted as always but Gibbs had known him long enough to sense the unease.

"Hey Gibbs, how have you been?"

"I'm good same really, but you're not."

"That's why I called you. I need your advice, maybe even your help." Cal took a deep breath not liking what he was going to have to reveal.

"Must be serious, you don't ask for help at least not that I can remember."

"It's ugly Gibbs really ugly. But there are things you need to know before I tell you what I need."

"Like the fact you're gay." Gibbs would have smiled at the look on Cal's face.

"You know?" Cal rubbed his face with his hands and then remembered it was possible he was being watched, so he pasted on his usual smile.

"I've always known Cal and I don't care. But I want to know what's got you spooked."

"Well as you know having any sort of inappropriate relationship while active military can cost someone their job. So it was brought to my attention..."

"Get to the point Cal"

Despite himself Cal smiled "Pain in the ass. There's a place where anyone whether they be an Admiral or a private can go to have private time, without ramification so to speak. Except, now couples are disappearing."

"And you can't call the police or risk major career issues."

"It's more than that Gibbs. This place is elite despite the fact that it caters to all levels. You don't find them they find you. It's a huge complex, casinos, hotel, private residences, shopping the list goes on. There are very strict rules, no electronics of any kind. There are private entrances, you give up any and all electronics. There are no cameras; supposedly, every time you enter you're swept for bugs. They are extreme in their safety measures. It's been around for decades and never a problem till now. Now in the past year three couples have gone missing and no one knows why or how."

"Dammit, Cal, why didn't you come to me before now? We can help you." Gibbs saw Cal smile, knew it wasn't real, saw him shake his head.

"That's why I waited Gibbs. NCIS can't officially help. It has to be someone who is part of the club. And the members go very high up. There cannot be an official investigation. One of the senior members has a very long conversation with anyone new to the club. It's made very clear that anything that happens never leaves the compound so to speak. Any problems of any kind are settled internally. Obviously before this year we've never had this level of problem."

"So what you need is someone to infiltrate the club, with the intention of finding out why couples are disappearing?"

"Sounds easy enough, right? Except everyone there has something to lose. Everyone's worried about blackmail being next etc. It's a mess and a big one and the political ramifications are huge. Foreign dignitaries have been known to make appearances. Big deals have been brokered at this place." Cal cleared his throat before continuing. "The problem is it would require deep cover and convincing deep cover at that. You couldn't bring just anyone into this and fake a relationship. It would have to look like you'd have something to lose. Everyone knows you work for NCIS you'd be suspected immediately."

"Unless I could be convincing enough...I see what you're getting at. How did you get into such a mess? Never mind it's probably better if I don't know the details." Gibbs took a deep swallow of his beer. "So if I could manage to find someone I could trust to bring in on this, how would I manage to get invited?"

"In two weeks a high ranking member of the club will be at a gala event. If you could get caught it would probably go a long ways. But the problem is, you have to be damn convincing I can't say it enough. If it's suspected you're acting it could get dangerous."

"Obviously" Gibbs sighed not liking where his thoughts were going.

"I suggest you work out the details and we can continue meeting for beer as we always have. I hate asking you Gibbs but I don't have any other options. Everyone else is too worried about the

consequences to do anything."

"I have to pull in two people, a woman I know and no I won't tell you who and the director." at Cal's look he grimaced "I know what you're thinking but we have an understanding, he knows things about me I know things about him. I can trust him."

"I hope you're right Gibbs. Look I need to go. But I can't stress enough to keep this as quiet as is possible."

Gibbs was still thinking about what Cal had said to him while he sat outside Ziva's apartment. It was two a.m. and he was taking a risk. He trusted Ziva, with his life, watching his back, with his vulnerability after his accident. This was different, he had always been attracted to her she knew it he knew and they'd left it at that. Still, pulling her into this while an obvious choice was a big risk. It was going to get messy and complicated, there was no way around that. It wouldn't be a short term mission that was for sure. It would take time to gain trust and a lot would be on the line. And of course she would have to be willing. Watching the clock tick to 2:15 he stared at the keys in his hand and hoped he survived letting himself into her apartment.


	2. In Her Room

Ziva sat up in bed not able to place what had woken her, but the gun in her hand told her it wasn't the ordinary sounds of her apartment. The soft sound of her front door shutting let her know her instinct to grab her gun had been a good one. Wishing she had slept with something more than a scrap of lace on she slowly made her way into the living room. She knew his scent the faint smell of beer did nothing to cover up the smell of the man himself. Wood and coffee enhanced his natural male scent. Lowering the gun she set the safety and set it on the coffee table. She watched him pause long enough to let her recognize him.

"Gibbs." She saw him study her face take in her appearance, could read the attraction that was always simmering there. But, there was more something in the way he held himself told her to be on guard. With barely a nod he indicated her window, telling her there was the possibility of being watched.

Tossing the keys and his jacket on her couch, Gibbs realized this was going to be more difficult then he thought. She looked beautiful the smallest scrap of silk and lace in a soft peach color barely covered her, her hair was soft around her shoulders mussed from sleep. She walked toward him and he knew she caught his signal when she walked with purpose toward him.

Moving close he pulled her into his embrace, tilting her head forcefully he pressed his mouth to hers. Moaning low in his throat was no act. She tasted amazing a bit like wine and everything like he'd expected. He felt her body respond instantly. She let her hand trail through his hair and it was her turn to moan. Pressing his lips to her ear he tried to steady his voice but failed. "Do you sweep for bugs Ziva?"

Lost as she was in the feel of Gibbs mouth his words were lost in the haze of pleasure, managing somehow to think clearly she answered in a whisper "Frequently"

"Bedroom, now" Gibbs saw the desire flare in her eyes and damned himself to hell.

Ziva knew it was unnecessary but needed to feel on equal footing with him so she let the devilish side of her win out. Reaching up to his shirt she pulled it over his head and let her fingers trail down his chest. Grabbing his belt buckle she pulled him toward her bedroom.

Gibbs let himself be pulled into her room and shut the door behind them. Even though they couldn't be seen now, he allowed himself the indulgence of pulling her close to him again. He thrust his hips against hers not bothering to hide his arousal. For a moment all he could do was rasp out a breath, finally he was able to step back and she did the same.

Raising an eyebrow Ziva waited for Gibbs to explain. The kiss had been in case someone was watching that much she knew, the arousal he was feeling was not an act.

"I couldn't risk calling first, or I would have warned you." Gibbs looked around for a chair and started noticing things. There were candles around her room, not lit but they had been recently. And her bedroom was far more feminine than he would have thought. There was a half empty glass of wine and music playing softly "Did you have company earlier, should I worry about someone coming back"

He was about to apologize when he saw her blush, and a deep one at that. "No Gibbs, there has not ever been a man in this room."

Gibbs realized what he had interrupted or at least what had occurred earlier and felt desire hit him again. "Holy hell, Ziva."

"Why are you here Jethro?"

"Jethro?"

"Seems appropriate considering we are half dressed in my bedroom, yes?"

Gibbs didn't know how to respond to that. "We were talking once and you mentioned having used sex as an interrogation tool. Have you?"

Whatever Ziva had expected it hadn't been that question, she hated the question, hated the answer more. Unable to meet his eyes she answered anyways. "Yes, there has been the occasion where I was required to sleep with someone as part of a case."

Gibbs didn't like how she couldn't meet his gaze, reaching forward he forced her chin up with two fingers. "There's no shame in what you've done Ziva I just needed to know." he tried not to notice when the strap on her nightgown fell off her shoulder.

"I have to ask Ziva would you do it again?"

Ziva stayed quiet for a long time. She was putting together the pieces of why he'd come here with what he was asking. Reaching for her wine she took a long sip. Finally she found her voice "For you or with you."

Gibbs eyes flew to hers, but before he could respond she spoke again.

"For you under orders... no Gibbs I would not. But with you, even to further a case yes. But then I would without the excuse of a case." She followed her words with another sip of wine.

Gibbs felt her words and their shock as much as he heard them. He wanted to push her back onto that damn tempting bed right then; instead he spent the next hour explaining what Cal had told him.

Ziva leaned back against the pillows on her bed and contemplated what Gibbs had told her, what it meant. "Talk about complicated."

"To say the least, I'm not worried about me but I do worry about your reputation Ziva."

Ziva laughed out loud at that. "Trust me Gibbs sleeping with you could only enhance my reputation." When he cocked his head the way she'd known he would she laughed again. "You obviously do not listen to gossip Gibbs, but most of the women at NCIS would like to get in your bed."

Gibbs snorted but took in the serious look she gave him. "I'm too damn old for you Ziva, it would mean a long term...relationship. For all I know you could be a relationship now" his hands clenched and unclenched at the thought. Without realizing it he had reached the edge of her bed and found himself looking down at her.

"There is no man in my life Gibbs. I do not care what people think and for the purpose of this case discretion will be more important than anything. But I do have to correct you on one thing, you are far from too old for me." kneeling on her bed she looked up at him and watched his breath hitch. She wondered if Gibbs had ever been with a woman that didn't care what people thought. She knew who she was and had no illusions but neither was she insecure.

Leaning forward she let her head rest against his chest, savoring the feel of the muscle beneath her cheek. Gibbs might be many years her senior but he was hardly old. He kept his body in perfect condition, well-toned and always ready for action she could see nothing to make her want to look away.

"Why me Gibbs"

Gibbs was having a hard time maintaining control over his body "You know why Ziva."

"Maybe"

Gibbs gave in and none to gently pushed her back against the sheets. Shifting he pushed his cloth covered hips against hers and felt her heat against his erection. "Because I want you and have wanted you since the beginning. Even when I didn't know if I could trust you I wanted you"

Ziva had known she would have had to be blind not to, but she'd needed to hear it. Especially with what the case might bring she needed to know now that he wanted her not just the convenience of a pretty face.

"You know I have wanted you as well. I know you could tell." Ziva met his eyes with her own despite the fact her body screamed at her to stop talking and start giving in to her need.

Gibbs saw her need and it matched his own. "It's going to be complicated and messy and I have no idea how it will work or what will happen eventually when the case is over."

Ziva smiled "Life is messy Gibbs and how could you possibly be expected to predict what will happen." Shifting her hips against him she felt his head fall against her chest. "You are going to make me wait are you not?"

"I have to tell the director the plan. We have to have an emergency out; someone has to know what's really going on. If he asks me if we've already been sleeping together I don't want to have to lie."

"I will be there with you when you talk to him Gibbs." she saw him start to protest "I will not have the director believing this is one sided or you somehow coerced me. We are a team."

Gibbs saw that she not going to give an inch and nodded his head in agreement. "I should go"

"And yet you are not moving" Ziva felt his hips thrust against hers and was reminded she was only wearing the slightest bit of fabric and why. Without thinking she looked over to her bedside table knowing if he left her this way she would be forced to make use of the items in her drawer for a second time this night. She looked back to Gibbs and saw he'd been watching her and from the look on his face knew what she'd been thinking.

"How long has it been Ziva?" Gibbs let his hand slide down to the silk of Ziva's thigh. He felt her tremble when he touched the softness of her inner thigh. "How long has it been since you've been with a man?"

"Over a year, and nothing meaningful before that. Most men I have might prefer not to stick around, so it is just someone to take the edge off." She felt his fingers teasing at the top of her thigh and wished he'd stop teasing her.

"Too long for a woman like you I would imagine. In fact I'd bet you have quite the appetite don't you and a varied one at that." Gibbs let his fingers brush so close to where she wanted him that he could feel the heat pouring off her but still far enough away to drive her to place her hands atop his. "In fact I bet you have no trouble telling someone exactly what you want." he chuckled when she forced his hand, literally by bringing his fingers to her soaking wet core. But when he slipped a finger inside her and heard the growl low in her throat he knew he was lost. She was tight, wet and nearly his undoing.

"You ate right, I do know what I want and right now I want you to make me come." Ziva knew she didn't need to play shy with him, didn't have to pretend and it was liberating.

Gibbs was so turned on by her request that he almost came in his pants. Instead he slipped another finger inside her and thrust gently creating an unmistakable rhythm. He felt her clenching around him knew that she was already very close. Reaching deep he searched only for a moment biting his lip as he resisted the urge to replace his fingers with his cock. He heard her cry out when he found that spot he knew would be her undoing. Ever so gently he pressed firmly against it and as he'd known she cried out and none to quiet. Her head thrown back, back arched she bathed his hand in wetness.

"That was beautiful Ziva." Despite his still unsatisfied state he felt amazing. She was beautiful and he could have spent hours just looking at her instead he slipped his fingers from her and smiled at her whimper. "Make sure your very late tomorrow Ziva I'll need an excuse to get you alone and then up to MTAC." With great effort he pulled himself from her bed.

As he walked away he heard her rustle the bed-covers and he nearly forgot his word. "I know about you too Gibbs. You like to control, to dominate, especially a woman. Not in any demeaning way, but in the ways that matter you like to make a woman feel safe, protected, desired...owned. In doing so you control, you do not like to make excuses for it;" He turned back to her and she saw the fire in his eyes knew she had read him correctly. "With me you never have to, just thought you should know."


	3. Elevators, MTAC and Janitors

Ziva's words were still ringing in his head when she stepped off the elevator two hours late and with no phone call. He had played his part stomping around being silently pissed. When in reality he had hoped she was getting some much needed rest. He had left her place at close to five that morning he wasn't sure but he suspected he'd been followed which meant he'd either been too distracted by Ziva's words or his shadow was very, very good.

She dropped her backpack on her desk as always and as she leaned over to check her messages he saw a love bite on her neck and wondered when he'd put it there. He saw Tony notice it too and the smirk.

"DAVID!"

"Gibbs I'm sorry I...I overslept." it was a lame excuse but, from how tired she knew she looked and the very obvious bite mark on her neck, it would work.

"My office now."

Gibbs could barely wait for the elevator doors to close. He slammed the stop button and with equal force pushed her up against the wall. Barely able to speak he asked her what he'd wanted to know the last few hours. "How did you know?"

Ziva didn't have to ask what he meant. Smiling she pulled him close. "I am a woman who is very good at reading people. I do not trust easily but I trust you, have for a very long time. It is in your nature to want to dominate. Not necessarily in an S/M manner but while you do not want a meek powerless woman you do want one that does not require you change who you are at your very core." feeling his lips at the pulse of her neck "When a woman knows that the man she is with will not abuse the privilege it can be a very big turn on to allow the man to be in control. It is very freeing in a way."

"You're killing me Ziva...soon very soon." Pulling back from her he knew he'd have to get her up to MTAC sooner rather than later.

Looking her over he decided she looked smug and he rather liked it, except for the reason they were here it wouldn't work. "You look too happy for having just gotten a dressing down from your boss."

"Do not worry, I can fake it if necessary." she almost laughed out loud at the raised eyebrow Gibbs gave her.

Stepping out of the elevator she made sure to look adequately chastised, as she made her way back to her desk and Gibbs went up to MTAC.

Opening the door he saw the Director was mostly alone, only two other agents were there working on computers.

"Director." Gibbs nodded "I need to speak to you, alone"

Leon didn't question Gibbs simply cleared the room and made sure any recording devices were turned off. "What is it Gibbs?"

"I've got an op that needs doing, only you can't tell anyone, you can't help me unless it gets ugly and it breaks just about every rule you can think of...well almost." Gibbs was blunt and to the point. When Leroy didn't flinch only motioned for Gibbs to sit next to him he began explaining what had transpired over the past twenty four hours. Except, the more intimate details involving Ziva.

The alert button for MTAC rang just as he finished up the details. Ignoring Leon's look of shock he reluctantly let Ziva in and saw it dawn on the director why she was in the room.

Leon had heard rumors of the "club" Gibbs was referring to and he would have said so but from the look on Ziva's face and her ready for action stance he changed his mind. It only took a second for him to know why she was there standing next to Gibbs. Gibbs was right rules were certainly going to be broken.

Leon had liked Ziva from the start; to say he was intimidated by her was no lie. She reminded him of someone else. She was known to do whatever it took to complete a mission. He'd sent her away when he'd first taken over partly from a need to assert control and partly because there had been rumors about her and Gibbs. Later he'd found out they'd been unfounded, but all rumors started from some grain of truth.

"Director I gather Gibbs has briefed you on the situation." at his nod Ziva continued. "I insisted on being here."

"I'm assuming agent David I don't have to ask why?"

Ziva held her head high despite the way the director was looking at her. "I am sure you are aware of the rumors since even before you came here about agent Gibbs and I. It is my belief they can be used to our advantage."

The director didn't miss the way Gibbs' head swung around to look at Ziva. Nor, did he miss the shock or the angry red haze that settled over the man. Yet more proof the rumors had been just that, rumors.

Ziva couldn't look at Gibbs it was a lie of admission but in Gibbs mind she knew it would still count as a lie.

"I am of course aware of the rumors, and that they were unfounded. But before we talk about any advantage they might give us. I have to ask do you fully understand what could be expected of you?"

Ziva couldn't hide the blush that she had no business having "Gibbs and I spoke about it at length. It's very likely these couples are dead. Even more likely there will be more couples missing before we can be trusted enough to get on the inside. I know what the possibilities are, what will no doubt be required. I am prepared and accept the mission."

Gibbs took a sip of his coffee and wanted to punch the Director and then ask Tony to do the same to him. Seeing the director look at him briefly and the back to Ziva he felt tightness in his chest.

"I can't order you to do this Ziva and I won't and neither can Gibbs. Any agency like ours can ask an agent to go beyond the boundaries of what is appropriate but I cannot, will not order it."

"I appreciate that, but with the situation as it is I could not live with myself if I just ignored the opportunity to help." That was honest at least.

"If I allow this things could get very difficult for you both after the op is over." The director watched Gibbs wince and knew it wasn't a worry over his own career. "I would of course do everything I could to smooth things over. But that could be sometime down the line."

Gibbs and Ziva nodded as one. But it was Gibbs who spoke first "We've had that discussion already. I'm prepared if necessary to accept early retirement. But I want it very clear that Ziva's career suffer no ill effect at all."

Ziva was pissed, another woman might have been flattered but she was irked. He didn't need to sacrifice his career for hers. Somehow though she held her tongue but she was pretty sure neither man missed her look.

"As you can imagine Director it would go without saying that Ziva and I would be discreet it is after all the whole point. What we would need from you is an out should things get hairy, the "in" so to speak for certain events etc. And possibly some negative attention if it helps further things. You would be the only other person than us to know what is really going on."

"I can handle the business end of things. You've already been seen at my house numerous times so that helps. But here we'll have to be careful. No more meetings like this."

"I was intentionally two hours late this morning; you can mark a reprimand in my file." Ziva had remained quiet only because she was pissed as she knew Gibbs was.

"Agent Gibbs I'd like a moment alone with Agent David, no argument."

Gibbs nodded he'd expected this; he didn't like it but knew it was necessary. Leaving MTAC he had to force himself not to look back at her.

Leon waited until Gibbs had left MTAC and the door was shut behind him.

"Ziva did Gibbs pressure you in any way?"

Ziva refrained from a blush this time as she thought of Gibbs pinning her to the bed, fingers pushed deep inside her. "He did not and you know he would not. He spoke to me in private about the matter and simple asked if I was willing. I thought about it and answered him."

Leon stayed quiet for just long enough to make her uncomfortable and then threw out the question he hated asking. "It shouldn't have to happen but what if you end up having to sleep with him."

Ziva had expected the question, had heard it before in a different life and was glad Gibbs was out of the room. War might have ensued had he heard it.

"I'm prepared to do what is necessary I said that before." at the directors shamed looked she smiled "He is not exactly ugly director and you have read my file so you need not feel guilty." Ziva worked hard to keep her tone neutral and stay the soldier she was trained to be.

The director knew something was there under the surface of all this, but figured it was better if he didn't know. "I'm going to give Gibbs the go ahead, but if at any time you change your mind. You come straight to me no matter what. Is that clear." at her nod he sighed "Good because that is an order. Now go downstairs and look properly pissed at being reprimanded."

Ziva had to work harder to hide the smile this time, somehow she managed to erase it before she stepped out of MTAC.

She barely heard Gibbs' whisper as she passed him "Play along."

Ziva sat in her desk and wondered what Gibbs was planning. When he slammed a stack of papers on her desk she suddenly understood and wanted to slap him.

"You don't go home David until these are done. Tony, McGee don't even think of staying late to help her."

Tony watched Gibbs walk off in search of more coffee. "Man Ziva you pissed Gibbs off good. Did you have to be late and then not even call?"

Ziva almost grinned especially when she saw that McGee was nodding most likely without knowing it. "Tony I overslept, my phone was under...something and the alarm ..umm" she waved her hand pretending to grasp for a word. "Got stepped on" this time she allowed just the slightest bit of a blush to show that got darker as Gibbs returned.

"I hope he was worth it David, today is now in your permanent record." Gibbs had to bite back a smile at Tony and McGee's eye-bulging looks at first him and then Ziva waiting for her response.

Ziva gave an entirely honest answer that was deafening even though it was a mere whisper. "You have no idea."

Two hours later Tony had to get his dig in and when Ziva returned she found a very thick turkey, avocado and hummus sandwich on her desk. At her silent question he smirked. "I figured you could use the protein."

Ziva almost threw the sandwich at him until Gibbs shockingly laughed out loud.

Looking at all three men she contemplated the sandwich "It certainly could not hurt. You would not believe his stamina" with that she sat down and ate her sandwich.

It hadn't needn't to be said that Ziva was not supposed to actually get the files done. It was an excuse to keep her late. It was now an hour after Tony, McGee and even the director had left. They were the only ones in the building except a janitor circulating the building somewhere; most likely what Gibbs had intended a little something to further fuel the rumors he hadn't known about.

She felt him come to stand next to her desk, and automatically rose to meet him. He put one strong hand on her hip and she couldn't stop her head from falling against his chest. She craved his touch wanted to feel him again.

Gibbs felt her need and it almost diffused his anger, but he wanted answers "What rumors Ziva?"

Ziva straightened and met his gaze knowing she couldn't sidestep this question. "There have been rumors for a while now about us. Offices always have them. I would have expected no different."

Gibbs nodded "But, I would have expected Tony. Not me."

Ziva smiled. Gibbs' words held no self-pity they were simply stated as fact. "Women always know who another woman is attracted to Gibbs. Call it biological or instinct. Maybe it's a way of learning the territory. But I heard the whispers from the time I first arrived. Someone I do not know who saw me coming out of your house one night."

"The night..."

"No not that night" Ziva pushed away thoughts of Ari easily they had no place here tonight. "I think it was the night after we all played poker I came back to get my jacket." She shrugged it didn't matter they had started all the same.

"I'm sorry" Gibbs moved closer to her and saw something flicker through her eyes "What?"

"I am not, I did not argue the rumors and I could have. I wanted..." Ziva stopped speaking when Gibbs pulled her close to him tipping her chin forcing her to look at him.

"What did you want Ziva?" Gibbs knew saw it in the apology hiding in her eyes and the way her body moved against his.

"I wanted them...the other women here to believe it was true." Ziva had been trained to lie, and Gibbs knew that about her so she met his eyes making sure he could see the truth.

Gibbs had originally had her stay late just to fuel the rumors and in the hopes a straggler might see them working late together but when he took her mouth with his it had nothing to do with an act. He thrust his tongue deep mixing his tongue with hers. Pressing her against the desk he heard the deep moan in her throat when he let one hand slide underneath her shirt to caress the soft skin of her taut stomach.

"I'm too old for you Ziva..." Somehow he'd found a way to pull away from her.

"Keep telling yourself that Gibbs." Ziva needed more from him "Meet me at my house in an hour. I have something for you."

Before he could blink Ziva was gone and Gibbs was left alone save the janitor who had just entered the office. Not sure what he'd seen Gibbs played it cool and grabbed his jacket and left.


	4. Belonging

Gibbs entered her apartment once again in the dark. Again he suspected they were being watched and it led him to wonder just how high up the members of the club ranked. He could easily see why they would follow him. It wouldn't be unreasonable to occasionally follow members, especially with people going missing. Anyone meeting with him could be suspected of letting the secret out.

Ziva came out and he was strangely thankful that she was dressed the same as before. "We need to talk Gibbs"

Gibbs nodded and joined her on the couch.

Ziva looked at Gibbs and tried not to feel nervous as she spoke. "I have a few requests, ground rules so to speak."

"Of course."

"I would ask that as long as we are intimate that you wouldn't sleep with anyone else."

Gibbs grinned "Ziva I have no desire to be with anyone else and there hasn't been anyone for a while now."

"And while I understand it might be necessary to "date" someone else for appearances sake. I would ask that you not get physical with her in front of me I tend to get..."

"Jealous Ziva...?"

It was Zivas turn to nod. "Also I'm not sure if you know this or not but I can't get pregnant. It is in my file and why, but I would rather just say it is injury related and leave it at that."

Gibbs saw the momentary sadness on her face and reached out to stroke her face. "I'm sorry Ziva."

"Me too but it is a fact. The reason I told you is there will not be a need for birth control." NCIS agents had routine physicals and she had checked out healthy at all of hers.

"I'm clean Ziva just in case you were worried but then I'm sure you knew that since you brought it up." Gibbs was having trouble breathing the idea of being inside Ziva with nothing separating them did strange things to him. "I would need to ask the same of you Ziva. Not to be with anyone else...I'm not sure I would react well."

Ziva smiled and reached for a small ornate box on her coffee table. "That is why I wanted you to come here tonight. I wanted to give you this. It was a gift from my aunt. They are a tradition among more old fashioned families. A quiet tradition due to the nature of it, A girl is given one of these, by her mother normally, upon reaching sexual maturity. Generally it is around 16 years of age. Open it"

Gibbs took the box from her and opened it. Inside was a gold bracelet about 4 inches wide with beautiful scroll work adorning it. Next to it was a long chain with some sort of key on it. He knew what it was in an instant.

"Traditionally it has nothing to do with the dominant submissive relationship. That is a more...Americanized way of using it. Traditionally it is given by the woman to her …." this time Ziva truly had to search for the right word. "Mate. It says that she is his and his alone. By accepting it the man agrees to an exclusive relationship. It is about trust and frankly ownership."

"Umm Ziva not to offend but I don't think it would fit me and it's a little...flowery."

Ziva cocked her head and then laughed softly. "Gibbs you put the bracelet on me, you wear the key. Once put on the bracelet can only be removed by the key. This particular bracelet has only that one key.

Gibbs stared at the bracelet and felt a wave of desire so strong it hit him like a truck. He touched the gold gently, understanding the enormity of what Ziva was giving him. "Ziva,...I."

"I knew I wanted to give it to you very shortly after we met Gibbs. I should be embarrassed to say that, I am sure I am not like most women you have known. But, I know what I want and I try not to ever be ashamed of it. This case might have brought things out into the open, but they were there before at least for me."

Gibbs nodded they had been there for him to. He picked the bracelet up and it was slightly heavier than he expected. He raised a questioning eye to Ziva.

"It is meant to be a reminder every moment to the person wearing it." Ziva was watching Gibbs turn the bracelet over and over and felt her blood fire at the thought of Gibbs slipping it on her.

Gibbs watched her closely; he knew what she looked like when she was aroused now. Watching him touching the bracelet was arousing her. Was it really possible he'd found a woman who understood his needs. "I can be very possessive Ziva, it's been many years since I've had the opportunity to embrace that part of me but it's there and if I"

Ziva cut him off knowing what he was trying to say but not needing to torture him. "Why do you think I gave you this? I have never worn it before. Before you I never had the desire too, it was just a family myth, heirloom and then I met you."

Gibbs wanted to strip her bare right then and there. Instead he continued his perusal of the bracelet. "I don't believe Cal. When he says there are no cameras. He either is naïve or thought telling me would scare me off. I would bet a boat that they have cameras in the private rooms; If not for blackmail at the very least for insurance purposes."

"It is what I would do." Ziva knew where he was going with his line of thinking. She remained quiet knowing he needed to be the one to say it.

'it's possible we'd have to make use of one of those rooms." despite how it both angered and turned him on Gibbs held his emotions in check.

Ziva smiled, she could read Gibbs better than he would probably like. "Is it the jealousy or the turn on that bothers you most?" she heard his indrawn breath

"I don't know how to answer that." Gibbs clenched and unclenched his fists.

"if you need to know if the idea of being recorded would prevent me from continuing with the case, the answer is no. As for how I feel about being watched...it is not a turn-off at the very least. I have never been watched before." she knew the moment Gibbs lost his famed control. He reached for her none too gently grasping her hair he tugged gently and captured her mouth with his.

Gibbs had been shocked Ziva had truly surprised him. Still holding her hair he released her mouth only to trail his own to her neck where he gently kissed the mark he'd left the night before. 'I didn't know I did this, it wasn't intentional."

Ziva had always loved Gibbs' voice. The low raspy timbre had been the very first thing that had attracted her to him. In this moment in was pitched even lower a husky quiet caress that slid over her skin like satin. "I have no complaints."

Gibbs gave in then; grasping her fingers he led her toward her bedroom, gathering the box as they went. He seated himself on the edge of the bed; he rested the box next to him. Grasping Ziva's' hips he brought her to stand in front of him. He reached up and pulled the tie from her hair, the dark cloud surrounded her falling softly below her shoulders. Deciding he would test the waters of how far Ziva would let him go he pulled it gently "No more cutting your hair Ziva, a trim yes but just a little. I like it long."

Ziva felt a zing of pleasure whip through her. She nodded without speaking. His hands reached the buttons of her simple blouse. With agonizing slowness he released each button and pushed the cloth off her shoulders.

Gibbs was reminded how young and beautiful Ziva truly was. The dusky skin of her breasts was caught up in the most amazing creation of blue and chocolate brown lace. It pushed her up and out even though he knew without having to be told she didn't need the help. "Did you wear this for me?"

"Yes."

"Thank you."

Pressing a soft kiss to her stomach he undid the button on her skirt. Just one button and with a gentle push it was on the floor in a soft puddle of fabric. It went without saying her panties would match her bra and yet it still caused him to rest his head against her belly. He could smell her need and it was driving him mad.

"You're beautiful Ziva."

There was something about the way the words were ripped from his throat that almost brought tears to her eyes. Ziva didn't cry but in this man's arms she almost did.

Gibbs felt Ziva tremble and chuckled softly. Standing he realized without her shoes just how much smaller than him she was. It only took a second for her bra to follow the skirt to the ground. He sucked in a breath at the site of her. Full with pouting rose colored nipples her breasts begged for his touch. He only allowed himself the luxury of grazing the tips with a knuckle. It was enough though for Ziva to gasp and he knew he would need to hear that sound frequently.

"Please." Ziva didn't beg but it seemed with Gibbs there was a whole other set of rules, not surprising all things considered.

Gibbs hooked his fingers into her panties and spoke even as he slid them off her. "Soon."

She was naked before him and despite her need he saw her intent was to be patient. He sat back down on the bed pulling her even closer as he kicked off his shoes and socks. He saw her gaze follow his hand to the box as he opened it. It was nearly his undoing knowing how willing she was to be his, to belong to him. He pulled the bracelet out again noticing the weight, it was open and he contemplated it for a moment.

Ziva felt the intense need to hold out her wrist and stomp her foot demanding he hurry, instead she waited. The wait both frustrated and fuel her need.

"You're very patient Ziva."

"Not really."

Gibbs smiled and then grew serious. "I don't take this lightly Ziva. This isn't about the case."

"I do not take it lightly either Gibbs, it is about us" Ziva hadn't failed to notice Gibbs was undoubtedly aroused. But she watched as he brought the gold bracelet toward her and swore he grew even bigger beneath the tan khakis he wore.

Gibbs moved slowly telling her without words she could back out at any time. When she only raised her hand to his he thought he could come right then. The bracelet was about four inches wide, and breathtaking in its antique beauty. It would not be missed by anyone who saw her. It would be commented on and asked about. He placed the gold gently on her delicate wrist aligning the two ends he saw the locking mechanism was quite intricate it locked in two places inside the gold on the outside layer the place for the key was cleverly disguised as long as you didn't look too closely. He moved to join the two sides and he felt her shake, looking up he expected to see fear. But, in Ziva all he saw was stark undiluted need.

"Hell Ziva are you trying to kill me." she smiled in that way of hers that fired his blood. With a deep breath he clasped the bracelet and the click though soft was loud to his ears even through the thrumming of his pounding heart.

Ziva hadn't known how meaningful this could be, but watching Gibbs lock the bracelet in place she felt so many emotions at once she couldn't place them all. But she swore she almost came.

Gibbs noticed the state she was in her scent teased him and when he looked at the small strip of curls at the juncture of her thighs he saw her thighs were slick. She was killing him.

Ziva saw Gibbs notice her wetness and for a moment felt embarrassed. But Gibbs was having none of it.

"Don't Ziva, you have no idea what it does to me to see you react like this to...us" Gibbs had to stop he couldn't speak anymore, especially when he felt her hands at the bottom of his shirt.

"May I?"

"Please." Gibbs didn't bother to hide the need in his voice, knew it would only fuel hers.

Ziva made quick work of pulling off his shirt. Throwing it on the floor she ran her hands through his hair savoring the feel of the silver strands she'd longed to touch for far too long. She was impatient and reached for the necklace in the box. The chain was long, meant to be hidden beneath clothing and the key was deceptively delicate looking. It was designed to be sturdy as close to unbreakable as possible. Breathing deep she brought the chain over Gibbs' head and settled it around his neck watching as it fell against him.

"Ahh Ziva the things you do to Me." there was something uniquely amazing in feeling her place the key around his neck and he had to simply breathe for a moment. He didn't have strength left for anything else. He placed a soft kiss against her belly, drawing the scent of her deep into his lungs. I want to touch you, all of you slowly but my control isn't what it should be even considering my age."

Ziva drew him up to his full height. "Not again Jethro, You are the man I have chosen, do not belittle that choice."

Her voice startled him and grinning at himself he nodded to her. "Yes ma'am."

Ziva reached for the button on his pants and made work of it, only a moment later and he was standing nude before her. She let her hands touch him gently tracing the contours of his body. There were scars just as there were on her body. But nothing about his physique gave her anything but pleasure to look at. Unable to resist she reached for his shaft letting her hand wrap around him. He was larger than she would have guessed. Long, thick and curving in her hand she felt her mouth water with the need to have him in her mouth. It shocked her enough that her eyes flew to his; she hadn't particularly enjoyed giving oral before. Had done so when needed but to feel the craving was not something she'd experienced before. "I want…."

Gibbs knew what she wanted could read it on her suddenly very expressive face. "Not this time Ziva, damn tempting but I'll never make it inside of you if I let you."

Ziva stroked him gently still not sure if she could resist the urge. The decision was taken from her when Gibbs took her mouth with his and guided her to the bed. His tongue thrust deep in her mouth claiming her mouth. His body laid across hers his shaft teasing between her thighs. She gasped as he twitched at her entrance. "Neshama…please"

Gibbs wanted to wait to draw things out but her mouth and her hips were moving against him with such blatant need he wasn't sure he could. She was whispering things he couldn't understand in what he believed was Hebrew, breathy words that made his blood fire. It didn't matter that he couldn't understand what she was saying the emotion behind them was clear. "You take my breath Ziva and my control." He grasped one knee and lifted her thighs apart taking a moment just to take in the beauty that was Ziva. His shaft had already stained her thigh with come making him groan low in his throat.

Ziva followed his gaze and moaned out her pleasure. His face was tight with control but there was something else there that she couldn't define. His hand grasped hers locking it above her head. His eyes met hers and as he slid inside her he hissed out "Mine" she came the moment he said it. The sensation of having him inside her, the understanding of the look from moments before, and that beautiful word with all its depth were her undoing.

Gibbs saw her come apart beneath him, felt it as she wrapped unbelievably tight around him and knew he'd never see something so beautiful again. She was tight, he'd known it been a while but apparently even with her toys indulging wasn't something she did often. Finding just the right rhythm wasn't difficult it was trying to stay in control long enough for her to come again that was the issue.

Ziva had barely come down from her first orgasm and she could already feel another starting to build. Gibbs had one taunt nipple in his mouth both hands on her hips rocking ever so softly inside her. Again she felt close to tears in his arms, he was so gentle with her so careful something she wasn't use too. Yet, as gentle as he was he still laid claim to her. Wrapping her legs tighter around him she felt him sink deeper inside of her knowing tomorrow she would feel the sting of tonight's activities. "No more waiting Jethro, claim what is yours."

Gibb heard the need in her words and damned if it didn't break the last of his control. He nipped less gently than he would have liked at her collar bone. The way her body fluttered around him told him she didn't mind and that's when the last of his control slipped away. Sliding in and out of her he heard her gasps and felt her pulling at him. Only when he heard her strangled cry did he finally let go himself one last deep thrust and he was spilling inside her. It seemed to last forever, her scent her joy wrapping around him and lulling him into something akin to sleep.


	5. The Morning After the Night Before

Gibbs woke just as dawn broke, same as he did every other morning. Unlike other mornings he didn't wake on his couch, didn't find himself in the clothes from the day before and he wasn't staring at an empty fireplace hearing the echoes of a previous life. As awareness of the day washed over him, he felt her satin skin nestled close against him. Her dark hair splayed out against her sheets, her body bare to his gaze except for the circle of gold wrapped around her wrist. Rising slowly in the bed he watched her breathing, taking in her beauty letting the image burn in his mind. She was his, he felt the gift of that knowledge caused his body to react even more than it had to the sight of her lying bare before him.

He'd taken her many times the night before, claimed her just as she'd demanded over and over and yet his body still urged him to take her again. That part of him he'd buried years before reared it's ever anxious head. It still shocked him that she'd sensed his need to dominate, but what shocked him more was her understanding of that need. He'd met another woman who thought she'd understood it only to find out that for him it went deeper than role playing, it had nothing to do with pain and everything to do with being given the gift of trust.

"How did you know sweet Ziva …" he let his hand trace the smooth skin of her back keeping his touch gentle but light enough not to scare her.

Ziva felt Gibbs rise in the bed; she didn't move savoring the scent of him on her sheets, the sound of his breathing as he watched her. She knew he was watching her could feel his eyes on her as surely as she'd felt his touch the night before. He was aroused it weighted the air and her body recognized his need. It had been this way from the beginning with him. The slightest hint of need in him and her body would instantly respond. Just after Ari she had wanted to hate herself for it but found the self-loathing wouldn't come, instead the attraction, her own need only grew stronger. She felt his touch and his words interrupt her thoughts. He'd known she was awake.

Gibbs watched her push aside the heavy fall of her hair and smile at him. He almost pinned her back to the bed and drove into right then, somehow he found the will to stop. She sat up reaching for the sheet until he shook his head.

"No."

Ziva stopped her body reacting instantly. One small word and she was aching for him. Except it wasn't the word it was the way he said it, more than that the way he felt when he said it. Watching him she saw a part of him she'd only caught glimpses of before. Letting go of the sheet she pushed it away, tossing her hair back, she sat on her knees across from him waiting.

"How did you know Ziva?" Gibbs couldn't let the question go. His body begged him to hard and desperate the sight of her kneeling, hair falling all around her wearing nothing but that intoxicating piece of gold and she was damn near killing him.

Ziva smiled, Gibbs always needed answers something she understood. He wanted her just as much as his answer. Sitting on the edge of the bed draped in the comforter did little to hide his need. Feeling again the need to have him in her mouth she bit at her lower lip and somehow found his gaze again. "I watched you Jethro. At first it was because of Ari, after it was because I needed to learn my place. At least that is what I told myself. Really it is because the moment I saw you I wanted you in my bed."

Gibbs couldn't help but move the slightest bit closer when she spoke and he couldn't hide the grin. Shaking his head he let one finger trace her collarbone. "It didn't make sense then did it. We'd both lost so much."

Ziva nodded knowing he was referring to both Kate and Ari. "I accepted what I felt thinking it would pass. But, there was this moment. It was during a case we had dinner as a team afterwards. Most everyone had left except"

Gibbs knew the exact moment she was referring to. "Except Ducky and Palmer."

Ziva sighed not bothering to hide her relief that he too remembered the moment. "Ducky was telling a story that related to our case about a woman who had been in a submissive relationship for years and never suffered an injury. Yet the woman in our case had been so badly treated. Palmer could not understand how anyone could allow someone to have control in a relationship. It was about being equals. And I said.."

"You said sometimes if you trust someone the idea of giving yourself over to that person in nearly every way is a gift to yourself. I remember you followed it up with or so you had read. But I remember when you said it Ziva."

Ziva nodded. "And what I remember Jethro is the way you looked at me when I did. In that moment you very much wanted to be alone with me. Or at the very least in that little corner at the back of that restaurant that is hard to find unless you are looking for it."

Gibbs hadn't known she'd seen him but it explained so much. Before he could speak she drew closer, the scent of her teasing him reminding him of how much she wanted him.

"I watched your face and saw a man you could not be or would not let yourself be. I did not understand why then. I was still too new to the team but in time I understood. Still in that moment I knew I was not going to get past my attraction for you, understood that while you might be attracted to me there was nothing to be done about it. Then I saw you standing in that alcove and as quickly as I had accepted what I could not change I knew that someday I would be right where I am now." Ziva didn't look away despite her bold words and the way they could be misconstrued. She would not lie to him. That first image of him needing her had branded her. Remembering that night her body clenched tight with desire.

After she'd spoken Ducky had picked up the conversation with statistics and Gibbs had excused himself. Waiting the proper amount of time she'd done the same. It hadn't taken but a second for her to survey the building and decipher where he might have gone. She'd found him standing in a small alcove back straight against the wall, breathing hard, fists clenched at his side, his body obviously aroused. He hadn't seen her and she'd respected his privacy so she'd crept away without letting him see her.

"That is how I knew Jethro."

"If you had come any closer Ziva, I couldn't have stopped myself from taking you there against the wall. I stood there half hoping you would." The surprise on her face was worth the admission. His hand found the bracelet tracing the intricate patterns. "It's morning Ziva, if you have any regrets say so now. If we do this, if I embrace this part of me again.."

Ziva felt his hand tremble ever so slightly against hers, such a telling sign from such a complex man. She'd expected this; things had happened damn fast and yet agonizingly slow. She felt her heart trip in its usual beat. Like the night before he was being so careful with her, but also with himself. Apparently she had waited too long to answer, he sighed and stood. The sight of him bathed in the early morning light, battle scarred and wanting her drove out any verbal answer. Leaning forward she grasped his hips and drew his erection deep in her mouth.

Gibbs went to step from the bed prepared to give Ziva some space, his question seemed to have caused the doubt he so feared or so he thought. In an instant she was kneeling mouth wrapped around him moaning out a sound of pleasure that nearly caused him to come in her mouth that very moment. His hands clenched in her hair and her mouth gave long leisurely pulls that threatened to take all his coherent thought. The image of her this way and the feel was a cascade of color in his mind. His entire body ached and he tugged her hair just a tad too hard forcing her to release him. "Another time Ziva I want you on your knees while I come in your mouth but right now I need to be inside you." Pulling her up from the bed he pressed her against the wall. "One more time Ziva you are sure?"

Ziva wanted him to touch her wanted his very nature the one he was fighting so hard against at this very moment. "Yes, no regrets no doubts, ask me now, in a week, in a year the answer will still be the same Jethro I am yours."

Gibbs watched her face as she spoke; he saw only truth and the blatant need for his touch. Grasping her hips he spread her legs with his knee. "I liked the skirt you wore last night Ziva, I've always liked it when you wear skirts. I pictured my hand running up your legs, touching you, pushing inside of you." His hand mimicked his words and she cried out at his touch. He chuckled and finally let the man she so wanted have full reign. "From now on Ziva whenever practical, that is what you will wear for me. If we're home, on this mission, outside of work, if it's safe I want you in a skirt. Something easy to touch you in, that I can lift up and easily slide inside you while you're wearing it." Again his actions mimicked his words. Plunging deep inside her he had to count to ten before he could speak again. "I want to know that at any time I could have you just like this." He lifted her arms above her head locking their hands together. "I want you to tell me what you like, what you want, always. I can't always be gentle, won't always be likeable but I will never..never hurt you."

Ziva took a deep shuddering breath, Gibbs' deep thrusts were breath stealing and his words fired her skin. Meeting his gaze she nodded. Letting one hand escape his grasp she wrapped her hand around the chain draped across his chest. Just as her hand grasped the key she felt the wave of pleasure hit her. She called out his name clinging to him even as he rocked inside her.

Gibbs saw a flash of gold in the morning light the feel of her surrounding him so tightly and the acceptance of all he was and brought his mouth to her ear. "You are mine Ziva David, here, now, always, mine." She called out again and it was only then that he allowed his own release.

Ziva was grateful an hour later that they had woken so early. Glancing at the clock she knew they needed to get ready for work. Gibbs had just enough time to go home and change if he left soon.

Gibbs saw her glancing at the clock and sighed. "I have to go soon. "

Ziva smiled and turned in his arms. "It is work Jethro I will see you there." She stroked his hair not wanting him to leave. He caught her wrist and looked at the bracelet.

"What will you tell them?"

Ziva looked at him knowing what the question was really about. "What do you want me to tell them, what would please you Neshama?" Ziva never let her gaze waiver from his.

Gibbs thought for a moment, wondering how much he was willing to reveal. "You will tell them it was a gift. For now nothing more. If they get too nosy remind them you like your privacy. Tonight we will go out for dinner, far enough away that it looks like we're trying to hide but close enough we might just get caught. Now tell me what that words means. "

Ziva blushed telling him would reveal just how deeply she felt and despite the fact he knew her feelings translating the word was different. But "that" Gibbs was asking the one she'd drawn out the one she wanted, trusted. "It means you are my soul, my spirit."

Gibbs watched her closely saw the small hint of vulnerability she tried to hide and understood that saying anything right now would be too much for her he chose to kiss her instead. Then he left knowing it wasn't an ending but a beginning.


	6. Gifts, Questions and Plans

Ziva stepped off the elevator and walked to her desk dropping her bag next to her chair she paused when she saw a small box on her desk. Nudging it with a pencil she eyed it skeptically. The box was plain white with nothing to give away what was inside.

"You know Ziva you could just open it and see what's inside rather than poke it. If it made it through security then it's not likely to be a bomb." Tony saw her frown slightly.

"I did not order anything, and I am not expecting anything either." Ziva continued to stare at the box.

Gibbs stepped to his desk coffee in hand and managed to hide a grin. "It was delivered first thing this morning."

Tony watched Ziva flush with color and smiled. "Must have done something right Ziva he's already sending you gifts."

It was all Ziva could do not look at Gibbs instead she let herself be distracted by McGee's arrival. He smiled at her like every other morning.

"What's everyone staring at?"

Tony elbowed McGee "Ziva got a gift."

McGee grinned wider and moved closer. "Are you going to open it?"

Ziva knew she didn't have a choice so settling in her seat she pulled the box toward her and lifted the lid. She had to bite back a laugh when she saw what it was. Reaching in the box she pulled the metal object out and couldn't hold back the laugh this time.

McGee cocked his head and looked at Tony when he snorted with laughter. "What's so funny?"

Ziva stared at the alarm clock. It took only a second before she remembered her excuse for being late the morning before. Her alarm clock hadn't really been stepped on but the thought that Gibbs would pay this much attention to detail still made her smile. She looked up and found Tony and McGee looking at her. "He felt bad I got in trouble for being late. I am assuming this is his way of apologizing."

Gibbs continued to focus on his computer but knew he should comment somehow. "Interesting apology."

Ziva laughed again, staring at the alarm clock she could tell it was an antique. It had a feminine flair without being girly. It would suit her bedroom perfectly and she had no idea when he would have had the time to buy it.

Gibbs' phone rang and the moment was quickly lost as the workday began.

Ziva began working through the various case files on her desk, grateful for the quiet few days they'd had. It wouldn't last for long though and soon she and Gibbs would be working two cases. Thinking about the case that had brought Gibbs to her room she wondered how long it would take to be invited into the inner circle. It wouldn't be quick or easy but she had some ideas she would run past Gibbs, no matter how much she would like to savor the fact that they could be together she couldn't forget that lives were at stake. She saw a shadow fall over her and looked up to see Abby.

"We're having lunch."

Ziva cocked an eyebrow. "We are?" Glancing at the alarm clock on her desk she was surprised to see it was nearing lunch time.

"Yes we are, we haven't done lunch in ages and I hear rumors. You get to spill your guts." Abby was nearly bouncing with eagerness but what Ziva noticed was not Abby's usual bubbliness but the way Gibbs ever so slightly startled at the way Abby said "rumors".

Abby oblivious to the havoc she was causing sipped on her caf-pow and continued nodding. "I'm not letting you say no Ziva. I ordered in Thai and everything."

Ziva sighed good-naturedly "Well I cannot possibly refuse that. "

Gibbs found he was watching her again something he was going to have to be careful of, if he didn't want to give them away. She reached up to push back her hair and the long sleeve of her blouse fell back, revealing her bracelet.

Gibbs held still and watched as his team took notice. Tony was sneaking up behind Abby attempting to pilfer her caf-pow just to annoy her, McGee heard Abby's indrawn breath and craned his head to see what had caught her notice. Just seeing Ziva wearing it brought forth a wave of desire, it didn't surprise him, Abby's reaction did. Abby stopped her bouncing, set down the Caf-Pow and reached forward to touch the gold. He would be forever grateful Ziva stepped back just in time to prevent the action.

"Wow Ziva that's beautiful …" McGee pointed to the bracelet, Tony whistled, but Abby remained oddly quiet.

Ziva reacted instinctively drawing her hand back and giving Abby an apologetic look so as to soothe any hurt. It was all she could do not to look to Gibbs but somehow she managed. "Thank you McGee it was a gift."

"It's an antique isn't it Ziva?" Tony watched as all heads turned toward him. "What a family with money means you learn this stuff." What Tony didn't say out loud was that it was a damn expensive antique from the looks of the gold.

"Yes it is." Ziva didn't realize the smile that touched her face was a dead giveaway to the depth of emotion behind the piece of jewelry but Gibbs saw it and he saw the others recognize it as well. They each looked at each other and Tony raised his eyebrows but no one said anything aloud.

He came up to her because it would seem odd if he didn't he looked down at the jewelry hiding what it truly meant and instead offering a casual smile. "Nice."

Looking at the others he took a sip of his coffee "Let's break for lunch. "

Ziva followed Abby to the office adjacent to her lab, where they often ate lunch. The set out the lunch Abby had ordered and began eating all without Abby saying a word, not the norm for her. Ziva remained quiet waiting for her to say something.

Ziva saw concern on her face, hiding a smile she stole a sip of Abby's' caf-pow.

"Ziva I know what that bracelet means...do you?"

This time Ziva couldn't help but smile. "Yes Abby I do."

"Traditional or modern meaning?"

Ziva blushed knowing exactly what Abby was asking "I don't have a Dom Abby. He is... I belong to him in a different way."

"So the traditional meaning then. I knew you were seeing someone but you haven't said anything about him at all."

There was genuine hurt in Abby's eyes; it was hard for Ziva to ignore. She and Abby had become close and yet she had shared nothing of course that would hurt her. "It is just that he is...so much more than the others. For now I need him to just be mine. I want to tell you about him, but.." Ziva sighed deeply "It is not simple Abby. I knew when I first saw him that I was his but the timing was not right and now it is very new but at the same time it is like we have always been. Does that make sense?

Abby watched Ziva and could see the depth of emotion she was struggling with. It made her smile, she was happy Ziva had found someone. "It does Ziva, surprises me if we're being honest but then you're good for surprises." Abby gave her a hug.

Ziva accepted the hug even though doing so was still a new thing for her. "Thanks Abby for understanding it helps. But please don't.."

"Ziva I'm not going to tell anyone what that bracelet means, that's your business."

Ziva nodded. "How did you recognize what it means Abby? I did not think anyone would recognize what it represents."

Abby saw Ziva blush for a second time and had to swallow hard not to choke on her caf-pow. She would have bet money she'd never find anything that could make Ziva embarrassed. "Well first I am a Forensic Specialist, secondly.." It was Abby's turn to blush. "I do have a Dom so while I haven't seen that particular type of bracelet I recognized what I was seeing."

Ziva absorbed Abby's words. "Do not take this wrong but that is not what my relationship is about. It is about pleasing him by allowing him to be the man he cannot otherwise be." Ziva pushed away her food. "I am not saying this well, in some ways it is like the lifestyle you are a part of. I give him the right to tell me what I can and cannot do under some circumstances, but there is no punishment if I do not. For me there is pleasure in giving him the right to do so, pleasure in when he asks something. It is in his nature to want to control, but he has not indulged that nature for some time so for him the pleasure comes from having someone willing to allow him to be that man. But it does not involve punishment….I could not."

Abby could have been offended by Ziva's need to reassure her that her relationship was nothing like the lifestyle Abby lived but she realized that Ziva was reassuring herself. After everything Ziva had gone through in her life it came as no surprise. Abby took Ziva's hand "It's okay Ziva, I understand."

Ziva took a deep breath sharing her secrets wasn't comfortable for her but Abby had shown genuine concern and their friendship was important to her. "I should go back to work. I know we have more time for lunch but I need some time to.."

Abby smiled and hugged Ziva again. "Just remember I'm here to listen if you need me."

Ziva nodded and left Abby's office. She made her way to an empty office and leaned against the wall. She needed, wanted Gibbs and wondered how the hell it happened that she could be in this state so quickly. She pulled her phone out of her pocket as the door opened, startled she pushed away from the wall only to find herself pressed back against it. She recognized his scent even as she wondered how he knew where to find her.

Gibbs locked his hands on her hips, "I went looking for you, don't know why just needed to see you. What happened?"

Ziva was shocked by his words, didn't understand his worry.

"You look upset. Did Abby say something?"

Ziva unconsciously pushed into his touch her need for him riding her hard. Shaking her head when words wouldn't force their way out she let her head rest against his shoulder.

Gibbs let his hand trail through her hair, it was easy to see what she wanted and damned if she wasn't tempting the hell out of him. "Ziva she must have said something."

Ziva drew in a long breath and met his gaze, "She recognized what the bracelet meant. I should have realized she might. She has seen them in a different concept , she has a Dom."

Gibbs took in his own deep breath. Still stroking her hair he felt her shudder. "She thought it meant something else, something she is more familiar with."

"Yes, I explained to her for me it was different. "

Gibbs watched her eyes stray ever so slightly away from him and realized she might have her own doubts about what he might expect. "That isn't what this is about Ziva, I would never ask that of you and it isn't what I'm about anyways."

"I know and that is what I told Abby. I just do not share my feelings well and it was difficult. Then when I left her lab I realized how much I needed you and it…" Ziva shifted in his arms trying to get closer knowing that time was rapidly ticking away till they needed to be back at their desks.

"It caught you off guard. You are not the only one Ziva. This is just as new for me as it is for you." He wanted to kiss her so badly but if he did he'd lose what little control he had left. "We'll find our way through this even it gets "hinky" as Abby would say." He saw her smile and felt her relax against him. Tugging gently on her hair he allowed himself a gentle press of his lips against her forehead. "I want you to wear your hair loose only for me from now on. I want to know that at night when it's falling all around me I'm the only one who is allowed to see it that way. "he barely held onto the last of his control when he felt her shudder of pleasure at his words.

"Yes." Ziva felt him pulling away and knew that their time alone until tonight was over. He left the room and shut the door behind him. Shuddering she gathered herself until she could breathe normally again, Gibbs was a force to be reckoned with even when you weren't his enemy.

Gibbs had sent everyone home at a decent hour, intending to follow quickly. Instead Ducky had asked to have a drink and Gibbs didn't refuse. Ducky was a good friend and he wouldn't neglect him when it was obvious he needed the company. He'd texted Ziva ,something that had caused her to send back a shocked smiley face to his phone. He hadn't had much opportunity to text before but he could see now the appeal.

It was dark by the time he'd finished his drink with Ducky and he decided to stop home first to gather some things before risking another night at Ziva's. If they weren't careful they would be caught before they really needed to be but that did little to stop him from wanting to be there. As he entered his house there was no longer any doubt he was being watched. A late model sedan sat in the same spot as it had a day earlier. Cautiously he entered his house only to catch the scent of steak coming from his kitchen.

Ziva saw him open the door gun in hand and almost reached for her own. She was calmed when he holstered his weapon when he saw her. "I took the liberty of sweeping for bugs, we are definitely being watched."

Gibbs nodded. "I'm sorry things ran so late."

Ziva smiled "Do not be I am glad you had a chance to visit with Ducky. I hope it is okay that I came here without asking first. I could lie and say I thought it would be good for our cover but I just wanted to be here with you. "

Gibbs wondered if she knew how beautiful she was. She dressed for him a long loose skirt and gauzy shirt made his palms itch to touch her. Her hair was loose and as he stepped closer to her he could tell she smelled as good as the food she was cooking. "You can come here any time Ziva, you don't have to ask." He waited patiently while she finished the last few steps in the meal she was preparing. He wanted to pay attention to it but found all he wanted was her.

"Tomorrow I'm taking you out to dinner. There is a restaurant about an hour's drive from here. Tomorrow is Friday we don't have to work the next day and I want to take you out. It will serve two purposes since we are being watched they will have a chance to see that we are trying to hide this, while not exactly doing the best job of it. But most importantly I want you to know that while we do have to hide this I wouldn't given the choice."

"I am not ashamed of us Jethro, but I do not mind having us as a secret." She turned off the stove and turned to face him, brushing against him when she found he was closer then she had realized.

Gibbs understood what she was saying, by being the only ones that knew about their relationship it became even more special. "Will you stay tonight?"

Ziva wanted to but she shook her head anyways. "Not the whole night at least, I thought I would leave somewhere around one am, that is if that sedan is still sitting outside your house."

Gibbs nodded "It was when I got here." He sighed and grabbed a beer from the fridge. "We should discuss how we're going to handle the case."

"That is another reason I came and made dinner. If you had come to my house I doubt we would have found our way to talking." Ziva smiled and served up their food. Sitting next to him on the couch she hear d him snicker.

"Not likely." Gibbs took a bite of his food and sighed in pleasure. He'd forgotten what it was like to have a home cooked meal. "This is good Ziva, I didn't know you could cook."

"As awkward as this is to say Jethro there is probably a lot we do not know about each other." Ziva saw him wince and laughed. "It does not have to be a bad thing, it just means we have lots to learn, yes?"

Gibbs watched her and smiled in return. It was a good way to look at things. "What do you think we should do next?"

Ziva pushed her empty plate away and thought for a minute. "I think going out to dinner is a good start. After that I think we should spend a few days as we normally would not seeing each other every moment. It is not my first choice but if we are trying to keep this quiet it would not make sense that we would be able to be together every day."

Gibbs took a long swallow of beer and reluctantly nodded in agreement. "You're right. Also if we keep it somewhat casual it will be assumed this has been going on longer than it has."

"The waiting will not be easy for you I know you like to jump right into a case."

"Can't do that this time, Zi." Gibbs saw her react to the nickname with a smile but she didn't say anything. "It's more important than anything else that they approach us, we knew it could take a while so we'll just have to find a way to entertain ourselves till then." He grinned and waggled his eyebrows.

Ziva laughed she barely recognized the relaxed man in front of her. "I am sure we can come up with something Jethro." She took a deep breath and debated whether or not to tell him what she'd heard earlier in the day.

Jethro watched her wrestle with something "What is it Zi?"

"I heard a rumor today." Ziva saw him grimace.

"Seems to be a lot of those running around," Gibbs walked their plates into the kitchen and loaded them into the dishwasher. "Do I want to know?"

"Someone who knows Colonel Mann discussed that she is headed back to the states. She was saying that she intends to seek you out. I did not hear any more after that or when she might be returning, but I thought you should know." Ziva bit her lip working to clean up the kitchen in tandem with Gibbs. He stopped her by wrapping an arm around her waist.

Gibbs watched Ziva and didn't see the jealousy or insecurity he would have expected from another woman. "She and I ended things Zi. Yes we were together, yes it was somewhat serious but it would never have worked. If she's coming back to see me I have no idea why."

Ziva nodded and looked up at him. "I do not have the right to ask but is there any chance she is returning with a child you did not know about."

Gibbs felt like she had dumped a bucket of cold water on him, then he started laughing and found it very hard to stop even when she punched him in the shoulder. "Zi, have you been watching soap operas?"

Ziva pouted as he laughed at her. "Tony said it would be a good way continue to work on my social skills. From your reaction I am guessing he was playing a prank."

Gibbs finally stopped laughing "That would be my guess Zi and no there is no way she is returning with a child, this is her business but she was past the point of being able to have kids. Add to that we were always careful anyways. I always am with my partners."

Ziva took in that bit of information and blushed. "I am sorry Jethro ."

"Never be sorry Ziva, you can ask me anything. I would like you to answer a question for me though. This is not something you have to answer but I would like you to."

Ziva knew what his question was and walked slowly into his living room, sitting back down on his couch. It wasn't until she felt him next to her that she found her voice. "It was one of my first missions for Moussad, I took a pretty bad beating, lost an ovary, damaged another and there is scarring. When I woke up my father personally gave me the news."

Gibbs sighed and pulled her into his embrace, leaning back into the couch. "I'm sorry Ziva."

Ziva took in a deep breath. "It is a fact Jethro. I am not happy about it but it is."

Gibbs held her tighter. There was far too much running through his head, suspicions, ideas, questions, instead he remained quiet. "It doesn't make you any less of a woman Ziva. If I could make it better I would. If I could give you a child of your own I would."

Ziva was shocked and knew he could tell. She would never have brought up children if it hadn't been for her stupid imagination; she knew talking about children could cause him pain.

"That surprises you Zi?"

"Yes, I would have thought after this many years after …"

Gibbs gave her a rough smile. "after Kelly?"

She nodded against him.

"I will always mourn Kelly and Shannon, Ziva. I will never ,not have them in my head or my heart. I still love them. But I learned the hard way you can't get the past back. I chose never to have a child with my other wives, I thought because it would hurt too much but I realize it was because I knew things wouldn't work out." Gibbs stroked her hair. "I don't mean to hurt you."

Ziva shifted in his arms making sure he could see her face. "You didn't Jethro. I feel honored that you can share this with me. It is only right that you still carry them with you. And as fast as this has happened if I had the choice I would have your child." The pain of what she would never have eased somewhat and she enjoyed the silence of being held.

Gibbs sighed. "This is nice Zi, just sitting here holding you, never thought we'd have this. I shouldn't tell you this it's not right or fair but even when I was with Mann I still thought about you, still wanted you. "

Ziva listened to Gibbs' heart as she let her head rest against his chest. "There has not been a man I have been with that I did not want you instead Gibbs. I tried to make it work with some of them but I always knew I wanted you."

Gibbs savored that admission, "Don't wear that green dress tomorrow night." His tone was harsher than intended and he almost apologized when he heard her laugh softly he stopped himself. "What is so funny?"

"I do not even own that dress anymore and I would never have done such a thing." Ziva caught his blue eyes filled with frustration and offered him a gentle smile. "I have not ever slept with Tony if you are worried about that."

Gibbs felt relief wash through him trying not to let it show, knowing he'd failed when she chuckled again. "I wasn't going to ask Ziva, not really a fair question."

Ziva respected that he thought so, "Jethro, you have the right to ask anything."

"It's hard to think about him touching you, knowing how you respond so easily." Gibbs bit off the rest of his words.

"I respond that way to you Jethro, but it has not always been that way. With Tony it was an act; it was awkward and felt wrong. Even if we have to act a certain way for this case it is not the same because I want you, regardless of time or place. I never have wanted Tony." Ziva nearly lost her breath when she suddenly found herself underneath Gibbs his mouth against her neck.

Gibbs felt her sigh of pleasure against his chest. His fingers found the buttons of her blouse and quickly undid them pushing it off her shoulders he found she was naked underneath. "Hell!"

Ziva let her mouth claim his thrusting her tongue roughly showing him exactly what she wanted. Reaching between them she pulled off his shirt and began undoing the buckle of his belt. "Too slow."

Gibbs smiled and used one hand to pull off her skirt, again she was naked underneath and he swore loudly. "Had I known you were like this all night."

"Good thing we did our talking first." The feel of his slacks sliding off made her breath catch. Suddenly he was cradled between her thighs and her legs wrapped around his hips demanding more.

"I always intend to go slow with you Ziva, but then you're in my arms and it's like a dammed teenager again." Her smile as her eyes met his was of pure satisfaction. As he slid inside her she cried out his name.

Ziva felt him slide inside her and coherent thought flew away. His hands worked magic on her body, touching and caressing as his mouth did the same. She felt her body nearing the edge, she was hot and slick and his relentless stroking was driving her out of her mind. "Neshama…please I don't want slow."

Gibbs nibbled at her shoulder, waiting for her body to tell him it was ready. Even as her hands moved over him and urged him to move faster he heard her beg for more. It was his undoing. "Come for me Ziva, right now."

Ziva felt her body respond instantly, she fell the last bit over the edge at his words. Her body exploded barely able to register his whispered word in her ear and his own body coming apart against her.

Gibbs was lost when just as he asked she came and came hard in his arms, shaking with the force of it. The beauty of the moment pushed him into his own release even as he reminded them both just how much they belonged together.

"Mine"


	7. Who Predicted Snow?

Ziva was restless in her office chair Gibbs had brought her close to orgasm three times last night before she'd crept out of his house, but had refused to give her a final release. He'd simply smirked and told her he wanted to know she was wet for him all day. Glaring at him across the room he again smirked in satisfaction.

It was still early and Tony and McGee had just arrived. The team was finishing up a case of a gambling ring that had led to the death of a Navy Lieutenant. All that was left was to get their forensics together.

"So Ziva, another wild night at The Roxbury?" Tony grinned Ziva was tired that much was obvious she still looked amazing just tired.

"Are you asking me to discuss the details of my sex life Tony for the thrill or because you have none of your own?" Ziva caught Gibbs' grin out of the corner of her eye.

"Wait...what. Hey" Tony held up his hands in mock defense. "I have a very active, um social life. Just not used to seeing you look so." Tony stopped at the glare he was getting from the other three closest to him. "Energized, I was going to say energized."

Ziva laughed. "Nice save Tony. But I am still not answering your question. So mind your own business." She stuck out her tongue and grinned.

Tony shook his head truly happy for Ziva. "Fine, fine but he could at least let you get a little sleep." When even McGee laughed at that Tony waggled his eyebrows, and then finally moved past the subject.

A few hours later Ziva was working through a video feed with the Tony and McGee, documenting exact time's events had occurred for the case they were finishing up when a messenger stopped by her desk and handed her a pot with blue flowers in it. The flowers were beautiful and not something she'd seen before. Delicately spiky blooms in a shade of blue that she knew all too well spilled out of a simple ceramic holder. The color of Gibbs eyes, it was all she could do not to look at him. Instead she touched the gentle petals reverently and pulled the sealed envelope from the center. Tearing it open she felt her breath catch when she saw the single word.

_Mine_

Her body almost shuddered at that word and the memories it brought forth. She hid her reaction as best she could but knew she hadn't succeeded all that well when Tony spoke.

"You okay Ziva?" Tony almost laughed out loud when Ziva blushed deep enough that a blind man could see. Whoever the man in her life was he was certainly doing something right.

"Yeah, just surprised I did not expect them. They're beautiful even though I don't recognize them. I like the color." Out of the corner of her eye she saw Gibbs flick a quick glance at her and that brief look spoke volumes.

McGee was watching Ziva and felt happy for her that she had found someone to make her so happy. After all the hell she'd been through she deserved it. "They're bachelor buttons which mean anticipation; whoever he is he's looking forward to something."

Ziva sat and none to delicately her knees refused to hold her any longer and she knew the flushing of her skin would be well noticed by all three of the men surrounding her. She knew what "he" was anticipating. The dinner out tonight, he was picking her up around seven. She'd been thinking about it ever since he'd told her last night. "Just dinner"

Gibbs knew it was expected of him to say something Tony and McGee were looking at him like they were going to burst with laughter, not at her but at the utter ridiculousness of what she'd said. If he didn't say something it would seem odd.

"I would imagine Ziva that with you it's never "just" dinner. Are you forgetting that time you nearly stabbed Tony with a fork, and that was just surf n turf." They all laughed then and the moment passed.

/

Ziva was still smiling over his comment as she finished getting ready. They had to push dinner back and wouldn't leave till closer to eight but work had taken precedence. Standing in front of the mirror she fiddled a bit more with her hair and then let it be. She'd chosen a white dress that had the smallest straps holding it up, nearly backless and with a short skirt that swirled when she walked. She'd pulled her hair up letting soft curls slip loose here and there. Nude colored heels and tiny pearl earrings completed the outfit. The bracelet was her only other jewelry. She heard him come in and felt him stand behind her.

"Beautiful."

She took in his dark suit and crisp white shirt and had to agree, "Handsome. I love the way you look in a suit." Reaching up she brushed a wayward strand of silver hair back into place. It took all her effort to bite back the words she really wanted to say. They were there and honest but she didn't want to pressure him. "Ready?"

Gibbs pulled her close watching them in the mirror. "Yes, and if we don't leave right now we won't leave at all."

Ziva laughed and moved away grabbing the shawl she'd set out in case it got cold.

No sooner had they stepped into the restaurant, slash club that also boasted a hotel above it Gibb's phone rang. He almost refused to answer but Ziva assured him she wasn't going anywhere. Seated in a booth with her drink Ziva watched the couples both on the dance floor and in the other tables. In her line of work it was easy to see the couples that were new together, who were fighting, and who were not supposed to be together. Smiling she wondered what she and Gibbs looked like to other people.

"Any clue if we're being watched? I'm pretty sure we were followed but can't figure out who might be watching. I was distracted by your dress." Gibbs whispered in her ear as he slipped back into the booth.

"I'm not sure. I was trying to pay attention but the few people I thought it might be joined other couples. And that was the whole point of the dress." She let her hand grasp his and there was an instant thrill of the overtly public gesture.

"Dance with me Zi." He escorted her from the table to the dance floor watching as the lights caught the gold of her bracelet, unable to stop he caressed the gold as he drew her arm around him. "I like knowing you're mine Zi."

Ziva nestled in close swaying to the slow beat of the music. "I like being yours." She let her hands play with the strands of hair at the back of his neck and stole a kiss. "I would not have thought you a dancer Jethro but you do it well."

Gibbs grinned into her hair. "I don't like the fast modern stuff but I can hold my own, my dad insisted I know how. Besides there isn't much better than holding a woman in your arms, anyway you can get one there works."

Ziva laughed, "Ah so you are much like Tony in this?"

Gibbs shook his head as he chuckled. "You caught me."

Ziva smiled and then grew serious. "I sure hope so."

Gibbs knew what she was getting at "Sweet Zi I'm as much yours as you are mine." Grasping her face he kissed her long and slow, leaving it to no one's imagination just what they were to each other. The song ended as they exited the floor Gibbs felt the hairs at the back of his neck stand up. "Someone's watching."

Ziva knew before he'd told her "Yes Jethro but it's not who you might think." Ziva saw the mildly surprised but beautiful face of Holly Snow watching them from the table behind theirs. It would have been hilarious if it hadn't been such a damn shock. Ziva's hand tightened around his and it wasn't until she felt his fingers gently rubbing the gold at her wrist that she was able to breathe again.

"Easy Zi. It's not her I want and this might work to our advantage." His eyes met Holly's and he saw her collect herself as they approached her table.

"Gibbs, surprised to see you here but I imagine that's obvious." Turning her attention to the woman at Gibb's side she was shocked at how beautiful she looked. She'd only ever seen her in work mode tonight was something altogether different. "Ziva."

"Ms. Snow." Ziva held her gaze for a moment and then offered a smile.

"Would you two join me for a drink, I was dining with a friend but he left early." Holly watched Gibbs look to Ziva before joining her at the table.

Holly leaned into the pair and whispered softly. "I hope I didn't blow your cover using your names."

Gibbs understood now why Holly hadn't seemed more surprised to see them together. For a moment he couldn't find a way to respond to her question.

Ziva flushed at Holly's natural assumption and saw the other woman cock her head. "Ms. Snow…"

"Holly, please." Holly watched the two of them look to each other and then it dawned on her they were not undercover. They weren't watching the room around them, when they'd been dancing it hadn't been about creating a way to watch the room. She sat back against the booth and smiled. "So not undercover, then?"

Gibbs answered first "No Holly we're not undercover, but we're not exactly out in the open if you get my drift."

A waiter arrived and they placed their orders, all three grateful for the interruption.

"I gather we surprised you." Ziva was thankful when the drinks arrived and took a quick sip.

Holly smiled, "Not as much as you might think. I read people for a living and I know desire when I see it. You might have most people fooled but I was hardly blind to the fact there was something between you two."

Gibbs took a swallow of beer and smiled. "We weren't anything when you were around Holly." Gibbs let his fingers find the comfort of the gold on Ziva's wrist, gently rubbing in a gesture he knew would easily become a habit.

Gibbs saw a look pass between Ziva and Holly and next to him Ziva shifted in her seat. "What am I missing Ziva?"

Holly watched his face and answered carefully, "Gibbs women know who another woman wants. It's not unlike men marking their territory." She saw a strange look pass over Gibb's face.

Gibbs looked at Ziva and raised an eyebrow at her. "Didn't you say pretty much the same thing to me?"

Ziva nodded and let her fingers intertwine with his, "Yes, I thought I was more subtle apparently I was not."

Holly laughed. "If you two are going to try to keep things quiet you better work harder. The rumors at NCIS were already circulating about when I was there. Watching you two stand in the same room was enough to tell me a whole lot. Now, well let's just say I'd love to be a fly on the wall at NCIS while you two are working. "

Ziva wanted to dislike Holly had wanted to dislike her all along, but had never found it in her to be able to. "Is that why you never asked Gibbs to come home with you?" It was a bold question almost a gauntlet thrown down between the two women. Next to her she felt Gibbs freeze.

Holly laughed again and looked from Gibbs to Ziva. "I always knew I liked you Ziva, regardless if it appeared otherwise. And yes despite the desire of friendship from Gibbs I wasn't fool enough to step into that danger zone."

Gibbs thought perhaps he'd stepped into the twilight zone. "You two do realize I'm sitting right here?"

Ziva looked to Gibbs. "I did not say anything I should not have Jethro."

"Gibbs it isn't anything she said or you said it just was there hanging in the air. I told you it's what I know. And Ziva is right it's the only reason I never asked you to come home with me, as tempted as I might have been." Holly watched as Gibbs ever so carefully placed his hand firmly over Ziva's at the table. She knew what that gesture was about but she wasn't worried Ziva was the kind of woman who appreciated honesty.

Gibbs felt his body flush at Holly's blatant words, he reacted before he could stop himself and knew Ziva had to have felt it as well. Looking to her he saw a calm smile on her face. She was watching him watching her and he could see no anger in her eyes.

"Gibbs you do not have to worry I am not going to get angry at Holly for stating something I already suspected." Ziva loved catching Gibbs off guard and from the look on her face Holly was enjoying it as well. "She is only being honest."

Gibbs ran a hand through his hair and sighed deciding to ignore the fact that the two women sitting by him were discussing having wanted to sleep with him he moved on., "Holly things are complicated, we know eventually people are going to find out but we'd prefer to have that be later than sooner."

"I have no intention of saying anything if that's what you're worried about Gibbs, if anyone understands discretion it's me." Glancing at her watch she sighed. "As much as I'd love to continue this, I need to get home. It's later than I realized and I have someone waiting."

Gibbs stood as she went to move from the booth. Touching her arm gently he caught her before she could go "You ok Holly?"

Holly's smile was genuine "Yes Gibbs I really am, things have gotten better for me. But I really do need to go and you two need to enjoy your evening."

Gibbs watched Holly leave and in the same instance saw a nondescript blond man intentionally move to avoid being in his line of sight. Gibbs filed away that bit of information for later. He escorted Ziva back to their table and pulled her in close, not for anyone else's benefit but for him. "I took the liberty of packing a bag for both of us. We could stay here tonight."

Ziva heard his question but underneath that she heard an apology. "Jethro, spit it out there is something you're not saying and it has nothing to do with the young blond man watching us. I believe it has everything to do with Holly Snow."

Gibbs sighed and pretended to look at the menu that had been left at the table. He started to speak and then stopped not sure how to make the words come out right.

"Are you upset that she suspected there was an, us before there ever was?" Ziva pulled the menu out of his hands and took his hands with her own. She saw him shake his head and tried to think. "Ahh I see. It's the fact I brought up her wanting you. I did not mean to offend you Jethro."

Gibbs shook his head and managed a half grin. "You didn't offend me Ziva, I just…I feel I should apologize."

"You didn't do anything," She felt his hand clench hers and after a long look she realized what he was referring to. "Jethro, your reaction was normal."

Gibbs shook his head "Feels wrong."

Ziva smiled and held his hand tighter. "Jethro we were talking about her wanting to sleep with you. There would be something wrong with you if that did not cause you to react. I was not upset. I am still not."

Gibbs didn't like feeling so off kilter, but he heard the sincerity in her voice. "You surprise me Ziva; I'm not used to someone who is like you. It wasn't because I truly want her it was just.."

"I think I would like to have dinner upstairs Jethro, but first I think I would like to have you first."

Somehow they managed to pay for their room, grab the bag Gibbs had packed, and get into their room before they were throwing clothes on the ground and trying to make it to the bed.

"Need you Zi. Can't get enough of you." Gibbs tossed off the last of his clothing while she pulled the pins from her hair. Wrapping a hand in the long dark tresses he pulled her to him. "always want you."

Ziva didn't bother with going slow, reaching between them she let her hand wrap around him. Hissing out her pleasure she let her head fall against his chest. "The feeling is mutual and all day I sat in my chair waiting for this, waiting for you to touch me again."

Gibbs pressed her back against the bed, pulling her legs around him he savored the way she gasped for breath even though he'd barely touched her. "That's how I wanted you Zi, needing me as much as I need you. There were at least three times I couldn't get out of my own damn chair or I would have embarrassed myself. You really must stop chewing on pens it can't be good for your teeth and it drives me mad." He watched her smile and found himself doing the same, grasping her hips he steadied himself.

"Neshama… please.'

Gibbs chuckled and slid inside her with no preliminaries; she groaned low in her throat and used her legs to pull him even deeper. Gripping her shoulders he nearly came that very second. It was her turn to laugh and he knew she could tell his control was at its limit. As he felt her come apart and himself follow he knew he better get used to being out of control.

/

Downstairs the sandy haired man made a phone call, he gave his report. The man who had asked him to follow the legendary Jethro Gibbs had been specific. He wanted frequent check-ins. It didn't bother him in the least; Gibbs had a reputation one that was well earned. When he'd glanced his way earlier that evening the man had felt certain he'd been made. Thankfully Gibbs had turned his attention back to the dark-haired beauty he wasn't supposed to be with. A man like Gibbs wouldn't appreciate being followed. He'd likely want answers, demand them if necessary and he was in no position to give any. He'd almost followed them upstairs but decided it was too much of a risk. Instead he'd slipped the receptionist a fifty to find out they were indeed sharing a room, one with just one bed. Still he'd waited and watched the building very carefully looking for any other member of the team. When he saw none or anyone else that worked NCIS he made his call. It had been brief and to the point. Now it seemed he'd be talking to someone else very soon, sighing he wondered how Holly Snow would react to questions about her conversation with the couple. Taking a hard swallow of his drink he decided he was looking forward to this part of his job being over. Glancing once again at the elevator he pushed away his empty glass and made his way to the parking garage wondering just what he would find in Gibb's car.


	8. Surviving Ziva

Gibbs slammed his hand against the monitor of his computer. It wasn't so much the computer that was pissing him off but his frustration at the lack of progress in the case. Both cases if he was going to get specific. The dead body in a burned out shack outside of town had given up next to no forensic evidence, no witnesses and no damn leads. It had been two damn weeks and they were basically where they had started. They'd caught the case the Monday following the weekend Ziva and he had spent at the hotel. As planned they'd spent as much time away from each other as they could manage but it hadn't been easy. There were nights they'd been forced to sneak into each other's houses desperate to see each other.

Gibbs knew they were still being watched and yet they hadn't been approached, hadn't been even close to caught. He had to bite back a laugh and glare at Tony when he noticed. Under other circumstances he'd have been thrilled to know he could get away with being with Ziva without getting caught. These however were not typical circumstances. Adding to his concern was the fact Cal had cancelled on him twice with only a brief voice mail. This time he slammed his fist on the desk and even Ziva jumped. Sighing he looked at the three younger agents, and gave them an apologetic look. He stood with the intention to get coffee, when what he really wanted was to grab Ziva and spend some time in the elevator with her. Before he could step away from his desk Vance rounded the corner and pinned him with a look he couldn't quite read.

Gibbs halted his steps just at the edge of Ziva's desk. She stood when Vance approached and he caught the scent of her perfume, they'd managed a trip out only once more since the hotel and he'd found the perfume then. Just the faintest whiff reminded him of just how she'd thanked him for that particular gift. Mentally shaking himself he watched Vance eye him carefully and then turn his attention to the entire team.

Ziva watched Gibbs carefully, she understood his frustration. The two cases not going anywhere left for too much time on his hands at work. Gibbs didn't do well when things didn't go his way. Not having much time together had been getting to the both of them as well. Something had to give sooner or later. When Vance approached them she caught the almost to swift look he shot her way and suspected that something was about to change.

"Change in job description. There is a Gala tonight Admiral Phelps needs extra security." Vance watched Gibb's eyes narrow and knew what was coming next.

"Director we're in the middle of a case." Gibbs started to yell but then something in Vance look told him this was about more than the Gala itself.

"A case, that has stalled and isn't going to go anywhere while you provide the Admiral with what he's asking." Vance saw Gibbs catch on and was grateful. "The Admiral's regular security team has food poisoning and he personally requested your team to replace them. I'm not telling him no."

Gibbs pretended an anger and frustration he didn't feel. Instead he had a burst of energy he had to temper. There had been rumors for years about Admiral Phelp's personal life. Rumor's he enjoyed playing things a little rough and with more than one woman at a time. As an officer his record was impeccable and he was well liked. Still if the rumors were anything to go by this just might be their opportunity to get noticed.

Vance continued making sure to direct his words at the entire team. "The Admiral has been receiving some threats lately, nothing too overt or specific for that matter but he's not taking any chances. I just got word or I would have given you more notice. It's formal and starts at eight but you're expected to be there at six thirty." He saw everyone glance at their watches and saw Ziva roll her eyes. It was almost two which wouldn't give any of them much time to get ready. "Ziva I can imagine it will be harder for you to find something to wear than the guys if you need to leave now Gibbs can fill you in later."

Ziva caught that it was an order rather than a true question and saw the others catch it as well. "Sometimes it is annoying being the girl." She glared when they all stifled a laugh. Smirking she knew just how she'd make them suffer. "Since I have so much more work to do I think I'll take you up on that offer Director."

Three hours later Ziva had been waxed, plucked, polished and beautified in every way possible. Standing in front of the mirror in her bedroom she smoothed a hand over the figure hugging gold dress and decided she liked what she saw. She'd purchased the dress from a boutique located next door to the salon she'd found. She'd intended to wear something else but had seen it and knew she couldn't resist. A long shimmer of gold that fell to the floor with a sinfully high slit on the side it was meant to draw attention and that was just what she was hoping for. Per Gibb's request she'd worn her hair up, this time in a twisting series of intricate braids. Suddenly Gibbs was there behind her hands resting on her hips. He wore a black as sin tuxedo, even the dress shirt was the same midnight shade, it set off his hair and made her hands ache to touch him. She drew in a deep breath as his hand ran up her thigh to the knives strapped to her thigh.

"Turns me on Zi, probably shouldn't but." Gibbs let his hands travel farther up her thigh tugging gently at the lace of her panties. He saw both surprise and the flush of desire wash over her. "That surprises you?"

"Not all men like a woman who can,…do the things I can. For some it is a turnoff. At first they like it but the reality sinks in later. With you I know you are speaking the truth. So not surprised just surprised you would admit it." Ziva saw him pull his hand away and glanced at the clock on the wall, they were going to be late if they didn't leave soon, but as he turned her to face him she didn't care.

Gibbs let a finger trace her cheek, "I like, doesn't matter what anyone else thought." He ran one hand down her back to cup her ass gently. "Your strength, your abilities they make you who you are Ziva I wouldn't want you any other way." His hand reached for hers rubbing over her bracelet as he did so. "I know we're short on time and I should ask this later but I need to know something."

Ziva felt his heart pick up speed beneath her hand where she'd reached to touch him. She let her eyes meet his mesmerized as always by the depths in those startling blue eyes. "You can ask me anything Jethro."

He touched the gold and placed a kiss to the skin just to the side of it. "This. How is it you can be this for me? I'm not any easy man Zi, and I know what you've lived, what you've been through. How is it you can let me be this man with you?"

Ziva felt a spark of desire at his question, she'd known it was coming but the careful way he asked touched her. Making sure she held his gaze she answered honestly. "My life has been about being forced to do what I was told. My father made the choices in my life for as long as I could remember. For many years when I dated it was who he chose, who he found suitable. It was never about what I wanted. I did the work he wanted, saw who he wanted me to see, and when I fought back I was punished." She saw anger flash starkly in Gibb's eyes but she continued. "He knew how to hurt me, how to force me back into the fold so to speak. As I pulled away from him I sought out men that were the opposite from him in every way. A predictable thing to do, but I was never happy."

Ziva stepped away from him rubbing her hands together, "I dabbled in the "lifestyle" for a short while. It took very little time for me to realize that was in no way what I wanted."

Gibbs knew he didn't hide his surprise well, when she almost looked away but stopped herself. "not judging Zi.." and he wasn't he just hadn't pictured her being attracted to the S&M lifestyle.

Ziva raised her chin slightly. "I know, thank you. It was not long after those experiences, I met you." Reaching out she let a hand trail down his chest, moving slowly over the dark cloth. "You probably do not know this but the part of you that you think you hide so well is easily seen, or at least was by me. It is in the way you move, the way you speak, when you looked at me I could see you wore it like a second skin. It called to me Jethro. I found I stood closer to you, found more reason to talk to you, anything just to hear your voice, to feel you touch me, even if it was just casual. I also knew that for you being a dominate was not about inflicting pain but about so much more. I knew then that I could have the ultimate control over my life by choosing to give that control over to someone else." Ziva felt her eyes mist over and had to blink rapidly to regain control.

Gibbs let one finger brush her cheek where a single tear had escaped her best efforts. He couldn't find the right words to release what she had said meant to him. She saw it though he knew by the way her hand touched his jaw and she smiled.

"It was you Jethro that gave me the strength I now have." She wasn't referring to her physical abilities but the strength to have what she wanted and as he nodded she was relieved to know he understood. "Do not be mistaken though I could not be this woman with someone else. I trust you ….it would not be so with just anyone."

Gibbs pulled her back into his arms and barely held back the need to have her then and there. "Won't be anyone else Zi, not letting you go." He felt her reaction as he kissed her throat. She grew very still for just a second catching the true meaning of his words. It was as much of a commitment as he could give her but as she responded to his kiss he knew for her it was more than she'd expected.

/

Ziva walked into the ballroom where the gala was being held and cursed. Gibbs chuckled and as they walked in she heard DiNozzo whistle and McGee shockingly do the same. She looked over her shoulder at them and smiled. "And you wonder why women take longer to get ready."

Dinozzo had almost forgotten how damn sexy Ziva could be. The casual flirting and banter at work was just for fun but right now he was close to wishing it wasn't. The gold dress was damn near backless, with a slit just as damn near indecent and the heels made a man want to whimper. When she openly laughed at him he couldn't help but smile back. "Man Ziva I gotta say it's worth all the time you spend."

Ziva would have responded but the Admiral stepped into the ball room and the moment was lost. Ziva watched the appreciative glance he gave her but was careful to keep her face neutral.

"This building is not the best for security. There are far too many hidden spaces, and vantage points we will not be able to cover them all." Ziva watched the Admiral quirk an eyebrow and then nod in agreement.

"That is why I asked for you to come. The team that is sick is the one that normally sticks closest to me. Otherwise I have enough other men to watch those areas." He turned his attention to Gibbs. "The threats have been rather vague but with as many people aren't fond of my politics I prefer to err on the side of caution."

Gibbs nodded. "Seems about right."

McGee approached, "I'll be assisting your guys with managing the electronic end of the surveillance for the ball room. But I wasn't given any instructions regarding your suite?" McGee saw the Admiral grow tense and wondered if he should have kept his questions to himself.

Admiral Jack Phelps sighed knowing he should have expected to have this conversation but wishing he didn't. "My suite is covered by my personal security so you don't have to be concerned about that. I prefer it that way." Normally he wouldn't have said anything more than to not worry about it, but he was watching two of the people in the room very carefully as he spoke. "I'm very careful about my privacy."

For a few moments there was an awkward silence, till Gibbs spoke up. "Not a problem Admiral. The rest of us will work the room but remain in close proximity." Gibbs took a risk and gave a quick glance to Ziva knowing they needed to test the theory of what if any link The Admiral had to the club all without giving themselves away to the rest of the team. She caught his look almost smiled and went back to surveying the building.

Jack caught the look but noticed that Dinozzo and McGee were both busy with other things. Apparently Gibbs and David had their timing down. If the rumors were true they had to. That look had been in response to his comment about privacy. He caught Gibb's attention "Mind if your girl stays with me tonight?"

Dinozzo coughed and would have laughed except for he was watching Gibbs when the Admiral spoke. He saw fury rapid and real cross the older man's face, just as quickly it was gone but he was damn glad he wasn't the Admiral just then.

Gibbs saw McGee's head snap up at the comment and sensed DiNozzo watching him. He had to work hard to stop from both punching the Admiral and turning to Ziva to see what her reaction was. Instead he faked a calm he wasn't feeling and stared the other man down. "Asking the wrong person, Jack"

The Admiral knew he was in danger of having his ass handed to him, so he turned toward Ziva and gave an apologetic smile. "No offense, Agent David, Sometimes my sense of humor leaves something to be desired."

Ziva looked from Gibbs to the Admiral and then at the rest of her team. McGee and Dinozzo both were watching her carefully for her reaction. Gibbs she knew was doing his best to remember in this situation he was her Boss not her lover. "Then I will not take offense." Glancing again at Gibbs she saw his nearly imperceptible nod "I would be happy to stand with you this evening."

/

Ziva wandered the ball room pretending to enjoying being escorted by the Admiral. He wasn't that bad, he made good conversation was pleasant to the people he mingled with and his hands never went places they weren't supposed to. The earwig she wore let her hear anything the team might need to tell her and her mike was artfully hidden beneath the strap of her dress. Thankfully everything had remained quiet. The Admiral led them to his table and seated her across from him.

"I appreciate you staying with me tonight Agent David. You've made the evening far more pleasant then it could have been." Jack let his eyes flicker over the room saw Gibbs watching them and hid a smile.

Ziva saw his glance and silently wondered if he had already picked up on the two of them. "As far as ops go it is far more pleasant than most I have been on."

Jack smiled, "I can only imagine. This is beautiful." He gestured to her bracelet, almost touching it but when he saw the look on her face he paused and held back.

"Thank you it was a gift." Ziva couldn't stop from pulling back her hand into her lap.

"Is it sexual harassment if I ask if you're seeing someone? I promise it's just a way to make conversation and satisfy a curiosity, I'm not hitting on you." Jack watched out of the corner of his eye as Gibbs subtly moved closer to them, at his words he seemed to relax slightly.

Ziva smiled, "I could pretend to be insulted but I am not. Yes I am with someone and yes he gave it to me." distinctly aware of the fact that all of her team and most of his could hear their every word she didn't elaborate anymore.

"From the tone of your voice I'm guessing you don't want to share the details. I can understand that rumors can be a bitch sometimes." He saw her blink at his harsh words and then grin.

"Yeah they can. I tend to ignore them until I know the facts." Ziva watched something unnamable cross his face.

Jack could see why the rumors that swirled about this woman and Gibbs were so strong. If they were true he couldn't blame Gibbs there was something about. He glanced at his watch, "I need to take a phone call in my suite. Perhaps for appearances sake you should remain here."

Ziva laughed a little then. "My job is to provide your protection Admiral, I'll follow you but remain outside your room." Letting her hand play with her earring for a minute she spoke into the mike. "We're leaving the ball room, heading up to the Admiral's suite should be up there for at least…." She looked to the Admiral saw him mouth the words thirty minutes. "for about a half hour."

In her ear she heard both Tony and McGee send her a "Copy that."

She waited for Gibbs new what he would do. "Expect me to follow you in five."

Ziva continued looking at the Admiral but spoke to Gibbs. "Understood." Returning all her attention to the Admiral she. "Admiral.."

"I told you to call me Jack, I hear my title often enough." Rising from his seat he let one hand rest at the small of her back.

Ziva watched for anyone looking to closely at them or disturbed by their exit. Observing nothing she wouldn't have expected she allowed him to lead her out of the room.

Ziva stood outside the Admiral's room, he hadn't wanted to leave her just milling as he put it but she'd insisted.

Gibbs had watched them go out one of the ballroom doors. He had to look for her for a moment and found her in a small alcove that was near the doors that led directly to the private suites the Admiral was in. It would be impossible for him to come out those doors and not see them and whatever they were doing. She was leaning casually against the wall but there was nothing casual about the way she was looking at him. It was an opportunity they had discussed on the way here. A chance to get "caught" a risk but one that had the potential for a high payoff if The Admiral had the connections they suspected he did.

Nearing Ziva he was hard just anticipating touching her. She was beautiful; the slinky gold dress suited her coloring and hugged the curves he knew so well. For a moment he just watched her she was watching him through veiled lashes and what she wanted was very clear. In order to touch her, his back would be to the doors not something that came naturally but necessary.

"Going silent for a bit guys, Admiral's request." Gibbs watched her mouth drop open, yanked out his earwig and pulled off his mike, setting them in a windowsill a few steps away from the Alcove he held out his hand for hers.

Ziva removed her own electronics and handed them over. "You lied to them."

"That's going to happen, Zi, us, the case not going to be avoidable. Don't like it but it is what it is." He saw her nod a bit regretfully, and then she was watching him, eyes hungrily moving over him.

Ziva was tired of waiting, grabbing the lapels of his tuxedo jacket she pulled him close taking his mouth with her own. As their hips met she felt him hard and urgent through his trousers and acting be damned pulled his zipper down and slipped her hand inside taking him in her hand.

"Christ Ziva we're gonna get caught..." he meant that, the plan was just to make out a little. But what she was doing to him with her hand was going to lead to a hell of a lot more.

"I do not care, please just touch me." Ziva wasn't acting she'd been needy all damn day and seeing Gibbs in a tuxedo hadn't helped either. She'd always had a weakness for a man in a tuxedo.

Gibbs didn't have to be told twice especially when she pulled at his tie. He grasped one thigh gently and slung it around his hip while his fingers found her hot and wet. Groaning against her neck he knew no amount of good sense was going to stop him from sliding into her. "I can't wait I'm going to fuck you right here against this wall." Even as he spoke his body found hers thrusting deep.

Ziva couldn't stop herself from crying out. Grasping at his shoulders she held on as wave after wave of pleasure slammed into her with every thrust. She couldn't say how long he thrust in and out of her but the speed she'd expected from Gibbs never came. Instead he kept a steady pace teasing her body into a frenzy. She was so lost in him she almost missed the sound of the door behind them closing. Barely able to function from the pleasure haze she was under, she somehow managed to open her eyes and looked over Gibbs shoulder. The admiral stood there, shock, lust and admiration in his gaze. Ziva threw aside the former plan and instead of looking scared she shot him a look of smug satisfaction she didn't have to fake one bit. Then she couldn't think anymore As Gibbs skillful cock and fingers pushed her fully out of her mind.

Gibbs was lost in Ziva and it was his favorite place to be, he should have been focused on the mission instead all he felt was the feel of her hot and pulsing around him. She was in his veins, on his skin and as he thrust inside her all around him. He wasn't being gentle and she took every bit of his violence and told him with every cry that she loved it. She clung to him in an effort to stay upright so he shifted his position which drove him deeper and with one last twist of his hips took them both into oblivion.

It was a full three minutes of ragged breathing before Gibbs could speak again. "You're determined to kill me aren't you Ziva." he slipped out of her gently putting himself back together.

"Not a chance Gibbs I am nowhere near done with you." straightening her dress she took his hand in her own. She kissed him a soft gentle kiss, long and slow. "I don't want you to go anywhere."

Gibbs cradled her face gentleness in every movement a stark contrast to only moments before. "Good because I have no intention of leaving you." he started to ask her another question but she pressed a finger to his lips.

Ziva peeked out of the alcove, saw that the hallway was empty and gestured for Gibbs to continue.

Gibbs swallowed hard "Did he...did he see us?"

Ziva nodded.

Gibbs swore a not nice word and looked at her with reprimand he couldn't hide. "You were supposed to stop me..."

"I looked at his face and decided another tactic was more suitable." Ziva wanted to be annoyed at the censure in his voice but the way he was clenching and un-clenching his hands told her it wasn't her he was angry at. "When I looked at him there was the obvious shock, the turn on of what we were doing but aside from that he looked like he was proud of you. Not in the way a father would look at a son but more of a male..." Ziva couldn't find the words

"I get what you're saying."

"So instead I let him see the satisfaction of having you inside of me, that I was not ashamed of having you as my lover. I went with my gut."

Gibbs knew the look, had seen it on her face and it had nearly driven him to his knees. He wondered how the Admiral would react. It more than pissed him off that their private moment had been seen but he had always been a possibility.

"Gibbs you knew this would be difficult and I know you don't like it, but if I don't get back in there things are going to get more than complicated."

And with that she was gone leaving Gibbs to once again wonder if he would survive Ziva.


	9. The Invitation

Just wanted to drop a note to all those who are following this story. First off thanks! Thanks so much for all your reading and reviewing. It takes me a bit to get my updates up I have four kids, work part time and of course there's the everyday stuff. The next two weeks it might take even longer as I home school and we're at crunch time. I will try not to make it too long.

I have to thank one reviewer Brook for posting this quote from the bible

"I decked thee also with ornaments, and I put bracelets upon thy hands and a chain on thy neck"-Ezekiel 16:11

I had never read that before but it is very interesting how it fits so well. Thanks for the quote.

But really thank you all for reading, it gives this lady a lovely little bright spot in my day.

* * *

Gibbs walked into his house and found the Admiral sitting on his couch. He felt the sting of what this man had seen, doing his best to hold back his temper he leaned against the wall instead and dropped his bag on the floor.

"Looks like I need to start locking my door after all." Gibbs saw the Admiral smirk and knew what was coming next.

"If you don't want unexpected visitors finding out what you do here Gibbs I'd suggest you do. Who knows what someone might walk in on." The Admiral rose up and walked into Gibb's kitchen ignoring the way Gibbs looked at him. "You're playing with fire Gibbs, but then I bet you know that."

"Can't help myself the fires far too tempting, I know what you saw, makes me wanna slug ya." Gibbs didn't bother to chastise the other man for the way he'd made coffee as he had the right instead just accepted the cup he offered.

"I can imagine. Damn fine woman she is. That look she gave me, you're one lucky man. Except for the fact that when you get caught all hell will break loose."

Gibbs raised an eyebrow. "When we get caught? You make it sound a certainty."

"I caught you. You weren't exactly being discreet."

"Sometimes she can't be resisted or refused." Gibbs smiled despite himself.

"I can only imagine." The Admiral was surprised Gibbs was known for his rules and steadfastly following them.

"So are you here to warn me that hell is about to break loose?" Gibbs watched the other man contemplate his words for a minute.

"Me? No, I have secrets of my own. Just to advise you to be more careful. This town isn't known for its ease in hiding secrets. "

"Neshama?" Ziva came in the door cautiously, gun in hand she'd seen Gibbs's posture through the window. Just the way he held himself had told her something was going on, she cursed when she saw the Admiral. She'd expected him but that didn't mean this meeting was going to be easy.

"Ziva its fine, There is no threat here." Gibbs eyed the Admiral carefully warning the man the words were more for his benefit than Ziva's.

Ziva put the gun away and went to stand beside Gibbs. "Why are you here? Is it your intention to tell our superiors what you saw?" Ziva walked the line very carefully. They might suspect he was involved with the club, but they had no way to be certain. "I will not give him up."

Gibbs laid a gentle hand on her shoulder and with his other gently traced the skin around her bracelet tugging gently. He saw her bite her lip and step back from the Admiral.

The Admiral would normally have been surprised by such an upfront question, but as he'd learned Ziva wasn't what most people expected. "It's not my intention to tell anyone. I merely came as a courtesy to warn more discretion in the future."

Ziva openly blushed this time; it was intentional knowing it would be expected. "Thank you. You will join us for dinner then, yes?" She looked to Gibbs for permission and saw the Admiral notice, her chin lifted slightly. Gibbs nodded and she moved toward the fridge.

"Admiral.."

"Jack, I think here at least we're past the formalities. Can we speak in private?"

Gibbs didn't look towards Ziva; instead he nodded and walked into the basement.

Jack looked at Gibbs and decided to test the waters a bit. There had been rumors at the club that there relationship wasn't legit. It had been brought to their attention by a friend of Gibbs. Just a mention of another couple that might make use of the privacy the club provided. After this mention Jack had Cal followed and then Gibbs. It wasn't something he was proud of but it was necessary especially with what was happening to members and Gibbs job. When he'd suggested inviting them there had been much dissention. When he'd told them what he'd seen and showed the security tape from that night they'd all agreed that kind of passion couldn't be faked. Now he was left with sharing the fact such a tape existed, and so much more.

"She is an attractive woman Gibbs. I noticed that a long time ago. More than a few times I've wondered myself what it would be like to…"

"If you want to walk out of here alive you'll stop before you say another word. Ziva is mine and I don't share, Ever." Gibb's stare was icy, his control at its edge.

Jack smiled and took a deep breath. "Relax Gibbs that was a test of sorts. I don't tread in other men's territory although how much she would appreciate being considered your territory I wouldn't dare say."

Gibbs had suspected as much it was the only reason the man was still breathing "You'd be surprised Jack, but we'll leave it at that. Why would I need to be tested?"

"To see if what you and Ziva share is a momentary fling or something more, Let me finish before you get too pissed off. I know of a place where the two of you could be together anytime you wanted without fear of your careers being at stake. No hiding, no worrying who will see you etc. Its elite there are rules and serious consequences if they are broken. But it's somewhere where you don't have to hide."

"Jack I appreciate the offer but I'm not really looking for a seedy motel room on the outskirts of town." Gibbs drank his coffee and tried not laugh when Jack did.

"Gibbs you really do live in your own world. It's a small city of its own. A Movie theater, restaurant, dancing, entertainment etc, it might sound implausible but it's worked for almost sixty years." Jack watched shock and interest pass over Gibbs face.

"And how do I know I can trust this, or anyone else who might be there?"

"Because we have insurance on everyone, including you." Jack watched Gibbs freeze and the man's stare was enough to make him wish he wasn't the one delivering the message.

"Not possible." But the look on Jack's face told him otherwise.

"The gala Gibbs, the entry to my suite is always watched by a camera. When they dusted they bumped the camera and it wasn't aimed at the doors as it should have been. The tape which I have is very explicit. It leaves no room for doubt as to what the two of you were doing. And just to be clear I mean none. Before you hit me as you might like, I only bring this up because in order to invite you in we have to know that you to are legit. Not trying to get into the club just to get dirt on everyone. Normally we ask for proof in other ways. But, especially with the jobs that you two have the decision makers wanted more. The tape gave them that."

Gibbs forgot for a moment to care about the case or the opportunity they'd just been handed. "We were in the damn alcove fully clothed; you damn well couldn't have seen that much and who the hell has seen this?"

Jack sighed deeply not enjoying this part of the conversation. "My personal aid who has been with me for years and is a member of the club himself is always the first one to view the tapes. I have visitors as well, I like to keep private. He brought it to my attention, I viewed it as well as one other member of the decision making board. It's necessary for honesty. As for how well you were shielded you were not. At the risk of you killing me, you two fit beautifully."

Gibbs slammed his fist into the hard wood of his worktable. Trying to contain his anger, it was her voice that broke the red haze.

"Jethro, there is no shame in what we did." Ziva wondered what Gibbs would think if he knew that part of her was proud. She belonged to him he had staked his claim and she had done the same. So what if someone had seen it. This man who Gibbs seemed to respect saw no shame in it either, he saw it as beautiful. But then, Americans and men in general saw things differently. She saw Gibbs watching her, reading her and this time the faint blush across her cheeks was not faked. She looked away from him for the first time in her memory.

Gibbs saw things in her body language that both shocked and aroused him, for the moment he let it go. "How long have you been down here?"

"Long enough, I came down to tell you dinner was ready but I eavesdripped instead." She saw his mouth quirk and knew she'd said something wrong.

"I apologize Ziva, I didn't mean to embarrass you, I'm not sure how much you heard but…" Jack saw her smile and for a moment couldn't speak.

"Jethro will fill me in later. We should eat now." Ziva left them to follow.

Jack looked at Gibbs carefully, "If you would like me to leave rather than stay I will."

Gibbs didn't have to pretend to struggle with his decision. He knew this was the opportunity they had been waiting for yet he couldn't find the words to agree. Standing he almost refused, then he remembered the missing couples, and the fact that nothing had been found of them. "I'd like to hear more but Ziva should be in on the conversation as well. I don't keep things from her."

Jack nodded and made his way up the stairs. He glanced around at the simply set table and abundance of food and smiled. "Looks good, I appreciate the meal."

"You are welcome." Biting her lip she played with the hand-towel she was holding. "I appreciate that you did not question me at the gala."

It was Jack's turn to blush lightly. "I wouldn't have done that. As I said that night I understand what it's like to want privacy. Did you hear what I was talking to Gibbs about?"

Gibbs paused in the doorway of the kitchen wondering just how much Ziva had heard.

"I heard that there is a tape of us together, while I am not pleased neither am I ashamed." Ziva grabbed two beers from the fridge handed one to Jack and the other to Gibbs who came to stand by her.

"There was more to it than that. I didn't just come here to tell you that." Jack took a seat at the table.

Ziva served up their meal a simple stew she'd put in the crockpot before they'd left for work that morning. Biscuits and a salad rounded it out. She sat and Gibbs did the same. Automatically she let her hand find his on the table top.

Jack took a bite and didn't bother to hide his satisfaction with the taste. "Very good."

Gibbs decided to jump right in, "Have you had someone following us?" he felt Ziva's fingers jump beneath his.

"Yes." Jack saw Ziva's face flush with anger that nearly matched Gibbs but as quickly as it was there she hid it. "I was telling Gibbs that I am a member of a very exclusive club, a club that caters to people in relationships that can't be publicized. It has been in existence for over sixty years. You're friend Cal is a member."

Gibbs feigned surprise. "He never mentioned it."

Jack grimaced somewhat. "That is of course the catch. The club is beyond private. You have to be invited in and there are strict rules." He saw Gibbs shift his weight toward Ziva and gently rub her fingers. "The rules are in place to protect everyone involved."

Ziva glanced to Gibbs and then to Jack "Does this mean that you are inviting us?"

Jack nodded. "Yes, we had to be sure first that you two were a legit couple. That's why you were followed, and why the tape was viewed. We needed verification."

Gibbs clenched his fists above the table. "Why would we want to part of something run by people we can't trust?"

Jack grimaced again, sighing "You could look at it that way I suppose but you have to remember what's at stake. The people involved go way up on the food chain. The only way we insure the safety and security of all involved is by the utmost secrecy and only inviting in people who've vetted so to speak."

Gibbs watched something close to pain cross Jack's face when he said the word safety but it was so brief he almost missed it. "What about blackmail?"

Jack grinned at this, "We keep and retain evidence on everyone that is part of the club but it has never been used to blackmail anyone. No one is willing to take the risk. If it appears to us that someone is not following the rules there are very specific consequences. If you decide to join you'll be given passes, ID exclusive to the club and of course the rules." Jack took a swallow of beer. "Question is do you want in?"

Ziva looked to Gibbs and only to Gibbs. It was time to take the case to the next level. Watching for him she waited for his answer. She remained quiet waiting for his response.

"Ziva?" Jack didn't understand the look Ziva was sharing with Gibbs.

"I will allow Gibbs to answer you Jack. It is his decision." Ziva knew with those words how much she revealed. She felt no shame; instead she felt contentment in leaving the rest of the conversation to Gibbs.

Jack looked from Ziva to Gibbs cocking his head, he remained silent but he had questions.

Gibbs ignored those questions; taking Ziva's hand in his head he took a deep breath. He'd thought his answer was an easy one decided before Jack had ever walked in the door. Now though it was much harder than he would have thought. He had to focus on the missing, the very reason why this had all begun. "I think we'd like that invitation."

"I do have some more questions though. " Gibbs held onto Ziva but kept his attention on Jack. "How are we assured this is not a way to get us to come out, tip our hand?"

"If you come to the Haven, you can see. After your initial interview you'll most likely find many people you know there or have met. The last thing we want is for word to get out."

"Haven?" Gibbs let the word hang there.

"That's what it's been called since the beginning, because that is what it is to those of us that are a part of it. It's a place where we can go without worry of repercussions. The initial interview will not take place at The Haven. Only after the preliminaries have been handled will you be allowed in."

Gibbs looked to Ziva then back to Jack. "We're in."

The Admiral had left, and they had finished cleaning the kitchen. Ziva felt Gibb's passion simmering as he walked into the living room. It had been just below the surface most of the evening, driving him to end the evening quickly even though the conversation had been important. He pulled the shades, locked the door and closed the curtains effectively closing out the rest of the world. He sat on the coffee table, "Come here Ziva."

Ziva had known he would have questions. He'd looked at her in the basement just after she'd stepped down the stairs and he'd questioned her silently even then. She made her way toward him and stood between his open thighs. For a moment he simply stroked her hair, it fueled her need for him making her long for his touch in other places.

"Ziva do you trust me?"

Ziva met his gaze surprised at his question. "You know I do, always."

Gibbs tugged the loose skirt off her hips leaving her covered in only the long off the shoulder shirt. "You're a passionate woman Ziva. Don't take this the wrong way but I think sometimes I forget you are very much not like the other women I've had. You are confident, unafraid, not ashamed of who you are or the things you want. It's a new experience for a man like me." Gibbs traced the intricate pattern on the bracelet. "I loved Shannon deeply I would never try to convince you otherwise, the others were a mistake I should have healed before I tried to find what I would never find. But you, you are something infinitely different. I'm not good with words, or so I've been told, you are special. I _feel _again. But I worry I lack things you need or want."

Ziva felt her heart racing as he spoke the honesty was naked and raw not something she expected. She was shocked by his last words. "You lack nothing, …I.." She blushed again and found it difficult to look at him.

Gibbs used to fingers under her chin to steady her gaze to him. "Then tell me why earlier you could not look at me. It was…..bothersome."

Ziva sucked in a deep breath. "I was embarrassed."

Gibbs smiled a half smile. "About the fact that Jack and I were discussing us being on tape?" Gibbs already knew the answer but he wanted her to have the freedom to tell him.

"No." Ziva shook her head, her dark hair dancing around them like a cloud. Gibbs hands reached up and pulled the loose shirt down and away, leaving her completely naked beneath his gaze.

"I knew you were naked beneath your clothes the whole time, drove me crazy. When we were in the basement just after you heard what Jack and I were discussing. I could see your nipples through your shirt. Hard and ready for me, I thought about reaching out and touching you right then and there." Gibbs chuckled softly when she swayed against him and her lips parted in a sigh. "Tell me Ziva."

Ziva met his gaze feeling the weight of his hands on her bare hips wondering what her next words would cause him to think of her. "You were angry as a man has a right to be when you heard him talking about having observed us, seen us together Even though you already knew what he'd seen, hearing it from him must have been difficult. You were concentrated on your anger so you did not hear his tone. Or maybe I am just different as you say. He spoke as though he was jealous of us, of you mostly. He spoke as though you had made a conquest. I understand that most women would be offended by such a thing I was not."

Gibbs stroked a finger down her belly stopping just above the neat nest of curls "You were proud." Gibbs placed a kiss along her hairline standing to remove his shirt. "But it's more than that. Why won't you tell me? Why won't you tell me that the idea of someone watching us turns you on Ziva, is it so hard to say the words." She shuddered in his arms, whimpering that soft sound she made when her body was edging toward bliss. Reaching between them he let his hand slip between her thighs where she was wet and swollen with need. "Ahh, beautiful Ziva."

"It seems wrong, after all I've known in my life. First to accept, no, want to _belong_ to you. And, then to enjoy the thought, the reality of something like being watched, even I wonder if it doesn't make me a freak. I can't imagine what you think." Ziva refused to cry but the tears threatened all the same.

Gibbs almost head smacked himself. It made perfect sense, Ziva had been through hell, assaulted beaten and unloved, now with a man she cared for to share something so risky. He smiled at her. "How many men have you made love to Ziva?" he almost really slapped himself at the way she stepped back as though stricken. "Ziva, I did not ask how many men you'd had sex with I asked how many men you'd made love to?"

Ziva felt a rebellious tear slide down her cheek and calloused male fingers catch it quickly. "One."

Gibbs hadn't expected that answer, he'd figured she'd had at least one other man in her life she had loved. "You always surprise me Ziva, make me feel blessed. The fact that I can be the man I truly am with you is a gift. You openly call yourself mine nothing about that makes you a freak." While he'd spoken he'd undressed her the rest of the way. Unable to find the patience to go upstairs he leaned her gently against the wall. "Knowing I could be inside of you regardless of who is watching, and that it would only turn you on even more, that's amazing." Sliding inside her he hissed out some semblance of control. "Mine"

"Yours" Ziva knew the truth in his words and felt the truth wash over her in a wave of desire. His body sliding in an out of her took her breath as her vision became nothing but color. It took her only a moment to fall over calling out his name into his mouth as he wrapped around her.

Gibbs flew over the edge at the sound of his name. She'd come so quickly, fingers grasping his shoulders knowing for certain there would be marks tomorrow. "Love you Ziva." The words slipped from him. As they both shuddered in the aftermath. They had danced around the words but he had never actually spoken them. Her hand came up to stroke his cheek. He'd meant to say them under different circumstances in a more romantic setting but from the way she was looking at him he knew that didn't matter anymore.


	10. Another Visitor and Concrete Palaces

There was some question in the reviews about how Ziva dresses for Gibbs. It's not always the same outfit all the time. In my head she favors off the shoulder blouses and full skirts, more like something a gypsy would wear. Definitely nothing cult-like .

Ziva woke up before Gibbs for a change. For a long moment she watched him, last night he'd said the words she'd never thought she'd hear from him. It hadn't needed to be said he cared for her the time they'd shared together had made that clear enough. But, she'd never believed he'd actually say the words. Her heart clenched as she watched the softened lines of his sleeping face. Her life had become so intertwined with his, over the years it had been work that had joined them together now it was so much more.

Letting her eyes close for a moment she savored being next to him. Just being near him was enough to feel his strength. Unerringly her hand reached the short distance between them and found his. She traced the callouses on his fingers. Secretly she loved the feel of his work roughened fingers moving across her skin.

"I meant what I said last night Ziva, I love you." Gibbs watched her eyes flutter back open, the depth of emotion there was almost tangible. "Not sure when it happened didn't think I could." He took her hand in his. "Didn't think I could fall in love again."

Ziva felt the seriousness in his tone. "I Love you Gibbs and before you even suggest it, I am not saying it because you did. You have to have seen it by now. I just did not verbalize it because I did not want you to feel like you had to …"

"Say something back?" Gibbs grinned when she blushed. "That's why I said it first."

"Sometimes this feels so fast and other times it is like." Ziva let her words trail off.

"Like we've been this way a lot longer." Gibbs tucked her head into his chest and nodded slightly "Yeah I know what you mean."

"When do you think they will contact us?" Ziva let her fingers dance across the skin of his chest.

Gibbs felt his body harden at even her simplest of touches. "Dunno, soon if I had to guess. With what we know now."

"That is what I was thinking. " Sighing she pulled herself from bed. "Work is not going to wait for us. I have to get moving. " she laughed when he snagged her hand and pulled her back down beside him.

"Soon we're going to take some time off together, more than a few hours together would be nice. " Gibbs knew the surprise on her face matched his. He hadn't thought about what he was going to say but he meant it all the same.

"I would like that, maybe after we get into Haven we can find the time." Frowning she was reminded of the serious nature of what they were trying to do. "Sometimes I forget how we ended up here."

Gibbs sighed letting her once again slide from bed, trying to ignore the fact she was naked and he was already responding. "Zi, we didn't happen just because of this. It might have been the catalyst but it could only happen because there was already something there we've established that."

Ziva nodded. "Right."

Ziva leaned back in her desk chair hours later trying to stretch the kinks out of her neck. Filing paperwork on a case was never her favorite part. Three Navy Lieutenants killed because they looked like another man's wife that had betrayed him had taken far too long to wrap up. The paperwork was taking even longer. Glancing at Tony and McGee she saw them wearing the same looks of frustration as her.

"I think I want pizza for lunch anyone else in?" Ziva saw McGee and Tony look up and grin at her

"Sounds good" McGee pulled out his wallet and Tony did the same.

Ziva watched Tony pause and cock his head, out of the corner of her eye she saw Gibbs stiffen. Following Tony's gaze she saw what both of them were looking at. For a moment she wondered just how many surprise visitor's she and Gibbs were going to have, deciding not to tempt fate she instead braced herself for what she was about to endure.

Gibbs looked up and had to work damn hard not to look from his visitor to Ziva. Standing, he tried to hide his frustration as Colonel Mann approached.

Tony didn't bother to hide his surprise as the now very tanned and casually dressed Colonel Mann approached Gibbs, what did surprise him was the not so carefully hidden annoyance on Gibbs's face. Taking the heat for a moment he stepped up to greet her "Colonel Mann, long time no see. Looks like Hawaii is treating you well."

Mann tried not to notice the way Gibbs was watching her and focused instead on Tony "Retired Tony, so Just Hollis or Mann if you prefer and Hawaii is beautiful as you can imagine." She nodded when McGee smiled and waved and turned to say hello to Ziva.

Ziva had taken the opportunity to be on the phone, ordering the pizza she had mentioned so she just nodded and waved as well. She was far too thankful when Mann turned her attention back to Gibbs.

"Hey Gibbs." Hollis stood in front of his desk feeling more awkward then she had planned.

"Hey, surprised to see you here." Gibbs took a swallow of coffee and shuffled some papers. He was still working hard not to look toward Ziva. She was a confident woman, still the relationship was new and this could get sticky.

Mann cocked her head and tried to ignore the wall she felt him putting up. She'd come back hoping they could rekindle what they'd had before she'd retired. "I was hoping we could have lunch, I'm even buying."

Ziva bit her lip hard, it hadn't been hard to guess that Mann would want to see Gibbs outside of his work, she'd known there was a chance that she'd be coming here in the first place. Still the sight of the two of them standing close again wasn't exactly comfortable.

Gibbs was between a rock and a hard place, he had no logical reason to say no. Feeling his phone vibrate, he looked down at it and read the text. It was from Ziva and he had to bite back both a smile and a sigh.

_Go, it's ok, we knew this might happen. Love you. _

It bothered him but he deleted the message after reading it and returned his attention to Mann.

"Sure but we'll need to keep it short, I have a meeting this afternoon with the director." It was the truth; he'd scheduled a meeting with the director to inform him that they'd received the invitation to Haven.

Ziva pretended not to notice as they left. Instead she focused on her paperwork. She heard Tony snicker and braced herself for what was coming.

"Should be interesting to see what happens with those two." Tony crumpled up a piece of paper and shot it across his desk and hers into her trash can.

McGee cocked his head again "I didn't think they had parted on good terms. "

"Yeah that's why it should be interesting." Tony made another shot and leaned back in his chair. "What do you think Ziva."

"I think we should mind our own business. Gibbs personal life is just that." Ziva saw the pizza guy approaching and was grateful for the interruption.

Tony harrumphed and then helped himself to pizza. "Of course you would say that, you won't even tell us the name of your mystery man, where he works, nothing about him." It frustrated Tony to no end that Ziva would tell them nothing about the man she was seeing. He harassed her constantly and still she gave him no hint as to who he could be. "He's not married is he?" Tony heard the thunk and felt the swish but never saw her grab for her ever present knife that was now embedded in the cubicle beside him. He knew she was harassing him because it came nowhere close to hitting him but still he had to swallow carefully. "So that's a no and I'll apologize for even asking."

"I would never date a married man Tony. We just choose to keep our relationship very private." Ziva met McGee's gaze and saw him glaring at Tony and then grinning at her.

Tony swallowed some more pizza "I really was kidding Ziva"

Ziva nodded and walked over to grab her knife, " was not really aiming for you Tony, just wanted you to get the point." She sheathed her knife and turned back to her desk just as a messenger arrived at her desk.

She stared at the small plant that was dropped on her desk and thanked the guy that left it. It was just a small potted plant, small green leaves in a simple terra cotta pot. Cocking her head she pulled out the small plastic stick identifying the plants name.

"It's Ivy right?" McGee watched as Ziva looked curiously at the plant. "Not the poisonous kind."

Ziva looked up at him and laughed "yes, that is what is says."

Tony watched her face. "You look confused Ziva, your mystery man throwing you for a loop?"

Ziva frowned at him "I just was not expecting something like this from him."

"Ah Ziva maybe it's more about the meaning, like the flowers. I looked it up." McGee pointed at the computer screen in front of him. "It says here it means Fidelity."

Ziva audibly sucked in a breath, she couldn't imagine how he'd found the time or what he'd had to do to get this delivered in such a short time. Her eyes burned as she worked to hold back tears. Smiling even as she worked to control her emotions she sat back down pulling her little plant just a bit closer. She knew the guys were watching had questions. "He did not do anything wrong if that is what you are thinking. It is more of a promise."

Tony glance at McGee and then back at Ziva, she hadn't needed to say a word. It had been clear from the look on her face that whoever the man in her life was he was treating her well and had just made her very happy.

"Didn't think for a minute he had, wouldn't imagine he'd live long." Tony smirked and laughed when she did the same.

Gibbs sat across from Mann wishing he was anywhere else. She had filled the ride to the restaurant with conversation about her time in Hawaii, he'd listened but only because he'd had no choice. Now after ordering he found the silence awkward.

She reached for his hand across the table and he pulled back "Hollis, we didn't exactly part well, why are you here?"

Hollis had been hoping for a warmer greeting. She shouldn't have been surprised though. "I missed you, I know I pushed you and I thought maybe we could give it another shot."

Gibbs thought for only a moment about what she was saying about how he and Ziva could use it to their advantage. As soon as the thought came he dismissed it. "Hollis I'm seeing someone."

Hollis paused in the middle of taking a bite. Setting down her fork she eyed him cautiously. She took a sip of her beer. She didn't want to ask, his tone told her the answer but she found the words slipping out anyways. "Is it serious?"

Gibbs paused before answering her. "Very." He saw the carefully hidden shock in her eyes. "It was unexpected, but she's …" he stopped there unwilling to say more. He couldn't share how he felt about Ziva with her.

Whatever words Gibbs couldn't say Hollis could see the emotion warring in his eyes. "I see."

"I would have told you at NCIS but I prefer to keep things to myself." Gibbs saw her flinch.

"As if I could forget that." Hollis suddenly wasn't hungry anymore.

Gibbs sighed and pushed back slightly from the table. "I didn't ask you to come back Hollis, you knew where things were at when you left."

Hollis couldn't ignore the truth in his words but it didn't make her any happier. "Apparently I made a mistake in coming to see you." Pushed her plate away not hungry anymore, reaching for the bill she found Gibbs already holding it.

"Got it. I can at least buy lunch." Gibbs didn't apologize, he felt bad but he hadn't encouraged the meeting "I drove you here, let me pay for this and then I'll take you…"

"I think I'd prefer to take a cab." Hollis left before Gibbs could say anymore.

Ziva watched Gibbs make his way to the Directors office. He'd come back from his lunch with Mann without comment. Tony and McGee had given him a questioning glance but she'd just handed over her finished paperwork. Hiding what she felt for him was becoming more difficult with each passing day. Still there was far too much at stake to take any risks.

Glancing back to the small green plant on her desk, she smiled. Somehow he always knew what she needed. On any other day or night perhaps Hollis Mann's appearance might not have been as difficult but they weren't going to be together tonight. As agreed they would spend the next few days apart. If she remembered correctly Tony had mentioned something about dropping by Gibbs's house for a beer. Perhaps she would see what Abby was up to or maybe just catch up on her sleep. Looking up she caught Tony watching her and flushed lightly.

"I'd say penny for your thoughts but I'm betting they're worth a lot more." Tony watched her flush an even deeper shade of pink and laughed.

"Just thinking how thoughtful he is." Ziva paused for a minute "He's different than I'm used to."

Tony leaned back and watched her for a moment. "That's easy to see. He makes you happy."

"Yes he does." Ziva smiled mostly to herself. "I'm very lucky."

Tony, "Well I'm biased but I think he's the lucky one. Maybe someday you'll tell us who he is, even let us meet him." He glanced to McGee saw him nodding in agreement.

Ziva bit her lip not knowing how to answer that. "I hope so too."

Gibbs sat across from Vance waiting for him to comment. He'd brought him up to speed on the invitation to Haven, the fact they should be meeting with someone shortly. Vance had remained quiet and Gibbs was beginning to wonder if he knew something.

Vance sighed deeply, "You know I'm not entirely comfortable with this mission, right?"

Gibbs nodded. "Yeah, figured."

"I don't like inevitabilities that come with this type of case." Vance looked at the floor for a long moment then back at Gibbs "As ashamed as I am to admit it it's not just the two of you I'm worried about. It's my reputation as a director I'm worried about as well. If this goes bad, I approved it, that's just all kinds of ugly."

Gibbs laughed, saw Vance raise an eyebrow and laughed some more. "That's not going to be a problem."

"You can't know that Gibbs." The director nervously chomped on a toothpick and stared at him hard.

"Yes I can but you don't want to know why." Gibbs gave him a pointed look and almost laughed again when the director almost seemed to blush, if such a thing was possible. "I would never do anything to threaten Ziva's reputation or her career. As I said before if it came right down to it I would retire."

"How are you doing with keeping this from the rest of the team?"

Gibbs shrugged "It's part of the job, don't like it but for now it's how it has to be."

Vance nodded. "Keep me in the loop wherever you can. Be damn careful I don't want the two of you disappearing."

Gibbs stood up "Not our intention, we want to figure this out, get the job done." Stepping out of the office and shutting the door behind him he wondered how many more times he'd have to remind himself that. Looking down at Ziva talking to Tony and McGee he had no doubt they'd find they're answers, he just hoped it didn't take too long.

Tony spotted Gibbs walking back to his desk "Hey boss we still grabbing that beer tonight, I've got steak to go with it?"

Gibbs had almost forgotten about the plans he'd made with the guys a week earlier until Ziva had reminded him that morning. He'd almost canceled until she'd made him promise not to. "Sure, I should be home by seven or so, any time after that is fine." Glancing at his watch he looked back at them "You might as well head out now though, slow day."

Tony looked at McGee in mock shock "The boss man is letting us off early!"

"Tony, he just wants us to pick up the beer." McGee laughed good-naturedly, glancing at Ziva he stopped as they headed out "Hey you wanna come?"

Ziva smiled up at them "I appreciate the offer, but I am going to enjoy a quiet evening alone." She laughed when all three men looked at her in surprise, even Gibbs. "What? I have to sleep sometime."

Ziva filed away her paperwork, cleared her desk and gathered up her backpack. She moved toward the elevator and found Gibbs following her.

"David mind if I walk you to your car?" Gibbs played it casual for the remaining people in the office, but he wasn't really asking.

"That would be nice thank you."

They didn't speak in the elevator, the short flight of stairs to the parking garage or the short walk to her car. But the brief glance around the garage and his knowledge that she parked just out of sight of the security cameras had him pressing her against her car. His mouth pressed roughly against hers, tongue thrust deeply in her mouth, hands at her waist she was lost. His knee pushed between her thighs rubbing none to gently till she was moaning low in her throat. One hand steadied itself in his hair holding tight to the soft silver strands she loved so much. Part of her wanted to pull away to look and make sure no one was near, the rest of her didn't give a damn as his hands slipped beneath her shirt.

Gibbs hadn't been able to resist the urge to follow her; he'd needed to feel her against him. The slide of her skin underneath his palm was just barely enough to temper his need. He'd only intended a taste. A quick kiss to quench his thirst and then he'd let her go. Now with his mouth on hers and her legs wrapping around him he found he couldn't stop. Reaching between them he reached for the edge of the denim skirt she'd risked wearing today and wondered how far he dared go.

"Gibbs..you wouldn't" Ziva, felt her whole body shudder as he let his hand move beneath her skirt to skim her thighs, pushing aside her thong and slip inside her. Hissing she swore she stopped breathing altogether.

Gibbs chuckled, while covertly taking a brief look to make sure they were still alone. Gently he lifted her skirt and in the same moment unzipped his pants. Seconds later he was slipping inside her as he watched her face morph into ecstasy. She was gripping his shoulders so tightly he was almost certain there would be marks within hours and damned if he cared. Slowly he began to move and with every thrust he heard her gasp out her pleasure.

Ziva couldn't have told you in that moment she was in the slowly fading light of day surrounded by the harsh façade of concrete. All she knew was the sight and feel of Gibbs. His scent and strength took over. Pulling her into him in every way, his body moved her to his rhythm the pleasure driving her to a fever pitch. It wasn't long till his mouth was catching her cries of pleasure as they echoed through the evening air.


	11. A Warning and Memories

It was just a simple white envelope. Nothing dangerous about it, but watching it slide under her door was startling all the same. Ziva had known they would be contacted had been waiting in fact and yet she was still surprised that this was how they chose to do it. She was alone at home as she had been the last three nights. A necessity with Hollis Mann still in town, Ziva and Gibbs had managed only the brief moment in the parking lot the other evening but since then they hadn't had time for much more than a brief phone call. Her skin heated at the mere memory of that illicit moment. Turning the white envelope over and over in her hands she took a deep breath, she hadn't opened it yet wondering if she should risk calling Gibbs over and wait till he was here or just inform him over the phone.

Gibbs had told her Mann was still around and possibly even driving by his house now and then. Ziva hadn't been surprised even though he had. Ziva couldn't imagine giving him up, how Mann had ever walked away she couldn't understand. Grabbing her phone she decided against having Gibbs come over. Three nights and she missed him but it wasn't worth getting caught, not when they were so close to really getting into the case. Punching in his number, she didn't have to wait long he answered on the first ring.

"Zi, you okay?"

Ziva smiled she heard the slide of sandpaper in the background, could easily picture him working on his boat in the basement. "I am fine, just have an envelope in my hand, it was just slipped under my door."

Gibbs stopped sanding, setting the block aside, wiping sweat from his brow. "What did it say?"

"I was waiting to open it until I called you. I thought about asking you to come over but with her still in town, I think it still too big a risk."

Gibbs sighed deeply, he'd put off confronting Hollis about her driving by his house because he hadn't wanted to deal with the fallout that would come with it but it seemed he wouldn't be able to do that anymore. "I'll deal with her. Go ahead and open it." Realizing his voice conveyed anger that wasn't directed at her he took a deep breath "I.."

"It is ok Gibbs I understand your frustration." Ziva broke the seal on the envelope and pulled out the thick white paper. In plain black type were a location and a time nothing more. "Interesting, it says Buena Vista Inn six o'clock pm tomorrow.."

Gibbs wasn't surprised they would spring the meeting on them so quickly. "Let's hope we don't catch a case between now and then or things will get even more complicated. Not knowing what they have planned pack a bag for the weekend." Throwing the rag he'd used to wipe his hands at his work bench he thought hard for a minute. "I'm going to have to go talk to her tonight ZI, or getting out of town might get complicated. She told me what hotel she's at, so I'll go there."

"Gibb's you do not have to explain to me. I trust you." Ziva wasn't just saying the words they were true, she had no doubts, only the frustration that he had to talk with Mann at all.

Gibbs smiled to himself. "I'm telling you anyways. I don't like how she's handling this, figure I can do my part to make it easier on you. "

"Thank you, for that." Ziva stared out her window. "I miss you, I know that sounds silly I just saw you at work, but."

"Yeah, me too." Glancing at his watch he cursed when he saw it was already getting late. "It's a four hour drive to the Inn so we should leave no later than two tomorrow if not earlier, and I should get moving if I'm going to get this done tonight."

Ziva nodded despite the fact he couldn't hear her. "Yes you should. See you tomorrow." She hung up before he could, knew he was frustrated and needed to switch gears quickly. It didn't bother her that he would see Mann tonight. Perhaps it should but she had no reason not to trust him. When she thought of packing she smiled and decided maybe a quick late night shopping trip was in order instead.

Gibbs walked into the hotel lobby trying to contain his anger, what had started as frustration had worked its way into a full on mad on his way over. He hadn't called to warn Hollis he was coming over. He had checked with the hotel to make sure she was in but that was all. Now he stopped at the desk and asked them to call up to her room and have them send a message to have her meet him in the bar. He wondered what Ziva would say if she knew he'd taken the time to shower shave and don a suit, he hadn't done it to impress Hollis rather to make an impression. He chose a table rather than the bar top needing the space of at least a foot between them. After a good fifteen minutes of waiting he had almost decided to leave until he saw her finally enter the bar. It wasn't hard to figure out the red cocktail dress and high heels were the reason for his extended wait.

"Gibbs, I'm glad to see you, surprised but glad." Hollis would have leaned in for a kiss but Gibbs didn't look receptive and didn't stand as she reached the table. So instead she sat.

"Can't say the same Hollis." Gibbs ordered coffee when the waiter came by needing his wits about him and raised an eyebrow when she ordered a whiskey.

"Sounds like I'm going to need it." Hollis shifted in her seat, suspecting she knew why he was here.

"What's with the cloak and dagger crap Hollis? Can't say I appreciate it." Gibbs was barely reigning in his temper.

Hollis was grateful when the waiter delivered their drinks, taking the reprieve of a long sip of whiskey she saw that Gibb's patience was being tested. "I'm not sure I know what you mean."

Gibbs leaned forward and kept his voice low but his anger was still easily apparent "The hell you don't. Why are you driving by my house, skulking around like you've got me on stakeout?"

Hollis flushed a deep shade of red. Hearing it laid out so black and white made her sound like a stalker. She was just curious, she didn't like losing. She'd fully intended to come back for a visit and rekindle things with Gibbs. Finding him in a romance with someone else had not been in her plans. The fact he wasn't willing to share who that someone was, bothered her even more. Clearing her throat she tried for a blush not realizing how badly she failed. "I had my feelings hurt Gibbs, and I was curious who could have gotten the elusive Jethro Gibbs into something even he would willingly call "serious", you have to admit it's shocking."

Gibbs didn't give her an inch. "That justifies invading my privacy? Who I see is my business, I don't share well Hollis, there's a reason I didn't tell you who she was. There was a reason things ended between us. We don't work. Over means you don't get to know my business any more. Now let me make this clear. The surveillance stops or I stop being nice."

Hollis snorted not so delicately "This is you being nice?" she had to reach for her glass when his gaze turned stone cold.

"You don't want to see me not nice. As I was saying leave me alone Hollis, back off, and I'll leave you alone. Keep bothering me and you'll stay on my radar which trust me isn't a place you want to be." Throwing some money on the table he stood. "When do you go back to Hawaii?"

Hollis felt her hands shake slightly as she held her glass "Supposed to head back in a week"

Gibbs rubbed his jaw. "See that you do Hollis." Taking a quick glance around the room he left without another word.

Gibbs stepped outside and took a deep breath of night air, he didn't like what he'd done in there. Threatening a woman he'd been intimate with at one point wasn't pleasant. But something about her demeanor had triggered his protective instincts and put him on alert. Without realizing he'd driven there he pulled onto Ziva's street and found he was pulling into her driveway, using the garage door opener she'd given him he parked in her garage effectively hiding his presence from anyone that might be watching. He stepped into her kitchen and found the coffee pot full; he smiled knowing that meant she'd been expecting him. Ignoring it for the moment he made his way into the living room.

He found her dozing on the couch; he stood for a moment just watching her. Her beauty never failed to captivate him. She wore a soft pink cotton nightgown, a color he'd never seen her wear before. She looked soft and touchable a stark contrast to the woman he'd been with earlier. Kneeling next her he watched a smile curve her mouth. "I knew you would come."

"Couldn't stay away." Letting his fingers play through her hair he watched her eyes open and find his.

"Glad you did not." She let her eyes slide over him and gave him an appreciative glance. "You look good."

Gibbs flushed lightly "Thanks, did it for you not her."

Ziva stood up and helped him out of his suit jacket. She saw him take in the long nightgown she was wearing and smiled again. "Gibbs do not feel like you have to explain every move you have made tonight. I have not asked you any questions and I will not. As I said I trust you."

Gibbs let one hand cup her cheek "I love you Ziva, if I had known it could be this good would have done it years ago." As she touched his hand he thought about what would happen if anyone found about them, losing her if someone like Mann should find out about them and use it to hurt them. He winced when he remembered threatening her even though it had been a necessary evil.

Ziva watched as a pained look crossed his face "Neshama, what is it?"

Gibbs almost didn't answer; instead he sat on her couch pulling her into his lap. "I threatened her tonight. Only vaguely but still, I warned her if she didn't stay away she wouldn't be happy with how I would react." He waited for Ziva's censure, anger, reprimand.

Ziva contemplated his words, thought carefully before she responded. "I am glad. If you had not I would have been forced to and that would have defeated the purpose would it not?" She felt him turn her chin to face him dead on and met his gaze. "As much as I am yours Jethro you are mine and I will not share you. I will also not allow someone to threaten you, even such an idle threat that you could easily dispense with. Here in our homes I follow your will, that is my gift you. In the world outside these walls such a thing I could not let go."

Her words were calmly spoken but Gibbs was reminded of who Ziva was by the strength in them. "You are a gift Ziva one I am lucky to have. I don't want to talk about her anymore tonight. Tomorrow we have enough to think about, tonight I'd like to be about us."

Ziva nodded in agreement, moving into the kitchen she grabbed a cup and poured Gibbs a cup of coffee. "It is getting harder to hide how I feel for you Jethro, I did not realize how difficult it would be."

Gibbs took the cup from her hands and set it on the counter, taking her hands in his he looked down at her. "I know, but we will manage it's too important to do otherwise." He traced the soft line of her cheek "Do you look like your mother? I have never noticed much of a resemblance between you and Eli and I wondered."

Ziva was surprised by his question; they hadn't talked much about their pasts. Grasping his hand she pulled him into her bedroom. Reaching into her small bookcase she pulled out an aging photo album. The outside was showing wear as much as the inside was. Feeling her heart clench she climbed atop her bed folding her legs underneath her, waiting for Gibbs to join her.

Gibbs felt the quick shift in her mood, almost regretted asking the question but he wanted to know more about the woman who so snared his heart. Slipping out of his shoes he slipped next to her letting her lean against him.

Ziva opened the book, feeling the same mixture of sadness and joy as the first picture of her mother greeted her. "This is why I think Eli so often can't stand to look at me. "

Gibbs stared at the soft black and white photo and if not for the clothing the woman was wearing, he could have been staring at Ziva. He couldn't stop his fingers from reaching out to touch the photo protected by a thin layer of plastic.

Ziva swallowed hard and continued "He loved her a great deal, when she left he was very angry and vowed to never forgive her. I thought I could make it up to him. I was wrong."

"Instead he punished you." Gibbs was still shocked by the likeness of mother and daughter. It clicked in his mind that when Eli found out who his daughter was romantically linked with, he was going to be more than angry. He saw Ziva watching his face and knew she had to know what he was thinking.

"Yes. Whether it was intentional or not his anger was easily taken out on me." Ziva pushed aside her hurt and turned the page. "Here she is expecting me."

Gibbs had to clench his fists. Rivka was smiling an eerily similar smile to that of her daughter her belly round with child. He would guess her to be somewhere close to six months along. As hard as he could he couldn't push away the thought of Ziva the same way. He felt Ziva sigh deeply and squeezed her hand offering her the only comfort he could. He wanted to tell her what he suspected, the lies he thought she'd been told but couldn't bring voice to them not yet. So instead he kissed her cheek and turned the page. It was his turn to laugh with the next picture. Two young girls and Rivka. "You andTali?"

Ziva blinked back tears as she laughed at the picture. She and Tali had been caught making funny faces to the camera while their mother laughed. "Yes, this was a good day." She turned the page and saw Gibbs quirk an eyebrow. It was her in full ballerina regalia, en pointe.

"What?"

"Can you still do that, looks hard."

Ziva was shocked, she would have bet money Gibbs would have laughed at such a thing. "Actually I can, when I find the time I still dance. The flexibility is good for all aspects of training and I like it." She shrugged when he looked surprised. "You don't know everything about me."

"Would like to" at her raised eyebrow he grinned "Ok, maybe not everything but more would be good."

The next picture was of a teenaged Tali looking over her shoulder and waving to the camera. Gibbs heard Ziva's indrawn breath and knew without having to be told this was the last picture to be taken of Tali. "It never stops hurting does it?"

The shared pain in Gibb's voice forced her to look at him and she gave him a watery smile, "No it doesn't. It doesn't even get a whole lot better." She felt his arm tighten around her and found the will to turn the page. The next page showed her in full uniform standing at attention saluting like the good soldier she had been. They grinned at that one. The next page she froze having forgotten, she hadn't looked in this book in so long. Her hand shook and she couldn't bring herself to look at Gibbs' face.

Gibbs saw a laughing Ari staring back at him. Seated next to a far too young Ziva sharing beers at a table somewhere unnamable he felt the familiar rage rush over him that always came when he saw the man's face. It took a long quiet moment to wrestle it into something manageable. He had to really look at the picture see it for what it was, what it had been. When he could breathe again he realized Ziva hadn't said a word and wasn't looking at him. "Ziva?"

"Neshama, I do not know what to say." Ziva turned the page only to have him turn it back again.

"Zi, he was in this moment in this picture your brother, half-brother, whatever. What he became later, we have dealt with. You have nothing to be ashamed of. My anger when I see his face, I won't hide it from you because it comes from something very real and painful. Because of him I lost Kate. But, you sacrificed a whole hell of a lot to save me from him. So what's done is done. We can't rehash it every time you have a good memory of him. I won't ask that of you." Gibbs took a deep breath hoping somewhere Kate wasn't damming him to hell. "Tell me about him."

Ziva couldn't stop the tear that escaped the corner of her eye. "He was a protector to me Gibbs. Our father raised us to be strong, to never show fear. When my mother left and I came back to be his soldier he took full advantage. Ari, he saw what Eli was doing and did his best to protect me from the worst of what my father would dish out. Not to weaken me, but because he had been there before me. In many ways it gave me the advantage. He had to be very careful that our father did not catch on. But he was also very hard and as time went by began to change. Until he became the man you encountered." Trying not to fall into full on sobbing she took a long cleansing breath. "I think for him it was inevitable." She watched him nod and let the moment pass knowing nothing more could be said. Turning the page she saw a picture fall from the album into her lap. Smiling she knew what it would be.

Gibbs took the picture from her hand and looked at it long and hard for moment. It was Ziva in full NCIS gear staring off in the distance. It was the look on her face that captivated him and had most likely forced the picture taker to snap the photo. She looked beautiful, madly in love, the smile in her face so telling hiding nothing, a photographers dream.

"I was looking at you. I was walking in to work one day and a young woman walked up to me and said she was taking crowd shots one day for practice. She told me when she developed them she knew she had to give me this, said she did not know who was on the receiving end of this look but she wished she had someone like that."

Gibbs couldn't stop looking at the picture. "I remember this day, because of the crime scene…this was years ago." He'd known they'd said as much but still to have proof of it. He found her hand with his and held her tight.

Ziva set the album on her nightstand and let Gibbs pull them back amongst the covers. "Someday I'd like our picture in there, I've never done that."

Gibbs stroked her hair "You've had your picture with me before."

"I do not mean the work type."

"Oh, I imagine we could do that." Gibbs smiled it was such a female request something he hadn't had a woman ask for since he'd been married.

"You would not mind. I do not want to…" Ziva stayed tucked in close to him.

"Zi, what we share isn't going to be upset by you asking me to take a picture with you. I love you. I'm not going anywhere because you ask me for things." Holding her close he was surprised his body was remaining calm. He wanted her there was no doubt. Wrapping his arms around her he found that simply holding her was equally fulfilling and together they stayed that way long into the night.


	12. Where There's a Will

_So I know most of you are waiting for them to finally enter Haven. I promise they will get there but there are some other things that have to happen first. If I controlled the story they'd already be there but apparently I am not in control….sigh As always thank you for the lovely reviews and if I'm boring you I do apologize._

Gibbs watched Ziva pack her suitcase smiling, any other woman would have packed multiple pairs of shoes Ziva on the other hand was having trouble trying to pare down the number of knives she wanted to take.

Ziva saw Gibbs grinning at her and cocked her head. "What?"

Gibbs shook his head, "I just like the way you pack for a weekend away." He saw her lift a brow and then smile at him. "I remember you saying that Cal told you weapons aren't allowed in Haven but we aren't going to Haven yet." She paused for a minute and then continued quieter this time. "I don't believe there are no weapons, and I doubt I can manage to go in there unarmed."

Gibbs grinned again. "I kinda figured that Zi, I imagine you have all sorts of lovely places you can hide a weapon. Just do me a favor and warn me ahead of time, I wanna skip any nasty cuts." He watched her flush a deep shade of red and laughed out loud.

"Jethro you have a dirty mind."

"Damn right I do, at least when it comes to you." Gibbs moved to stand behind her and while caressing her bracelet let his mouth skimmed along her neck. "Vance asked me how I felt about hiding us from the team. I told him I was managing because it was the job, but I want you to know I would tell anyone who cared to ask if I could."

Ziva felt her pulse pick up understood the depth of what he was telling her. "I feel the same Neshama. Tony asked me if he would ever get to meet the man in my life, I could not really answer him. Tony is my friend and it is hard to lie to him." She hated that it wasn't as hard to lie to McGee but there were many reasons for that.

Gibbs understood that and hugged her close. She smelled good and had dressed for him. Today she wore a simple red dress that on her was anything but simple. Pushing it gently off her shoulder he pressed a kiss on the curve of her shoulder; turning her he trailed the kiss down the slope of her breast. She shuddered against him and he let his teeth nip gently, she always held him this way on the edge of darkness. He waited for her protest some sign she was unwilling instead he heard her moan low in her throat. The dress hit the floor as his hands tangled in her hair. Still he caressed her breast with his mouth. He felt his control slipping and trusting Ziva allowed it to slide slowly away.

"Hands on my shoulders Zi, remain still." Pausing long enough to watch her eyes, he saw desire hit her hard and fast taking with it the last of his control.

Ziva had felt the change in him the moment his teeth had nipped at her soft flesh. Deliciously rough yet still gentle she had known what his intent was. She could feel the shift in his body language, but it was when he spoke that she truly knew. That voice that she so rarely heard, like music to her ears had poured forth the man he only shared with her. Her body responded instantly, she was burning from the inside out just breathing for a moment. She felt him stand to his full height and her muscles tightened, her arousal scenting the air. As he watched her she was reminded just how powerful he was and she shivered in anticipation. She raised her arms settling them on his shoulders fingers biting into the softness of his shirt.

Gibbs saw how much she wanted him, how eagerly she responded to his simple command and couldn't stop the growl that forced its way out of his throat. She stood before him in nothing but midnight lace and a knife strapped to her thigh, damned if that didn't turn him on as it always did. Her arousal was heavy in the air telling him how much she wanted him. Letting his hand stroke its way down her thigh he took the knife from the sheath around her leg letting it rest delicately between her breasts he used the tip to slice the fabric free of her body. He watched for her reaction wondering if it was too much for her, only to see her eyes darken with need. Her eyes began to flutter close and with his free hand he grasped her chin ever so gently. "No, keep your eyes open, I want to watch you."

Ziva felt the lightening hot pleasure zip through her first when he used the knife to cut her bra and again when he spoke. She felt the whisper of steel as it ghosted along her hip and caught in the delicate lace first one side and then the other. Her panties fell to the floor and she heard him sigh, he tugged gently on her hair while slipping the knife back into its sheath. She had to work hard to keep her eyes open to keep them locked with his whenever he glanced to her. Her body clenched and unclenched calling for him to be inside her and locking her gaze with his was an intimacy she hadn't known she was missing.

"You are a gift Ziva, made for me." He traced the mark he'd left on her breast "_Mine_."

Ziva's body moved of its accord trying to close the short space between them. He stopped her with a firm hand on her hip. "No." her eyes snapped to his nearly cursing the raw grin he didn't bother to hide.

"Are you wet Ziva, you must be. I've barely touched you and yet I can smell your need." He saw her blush and her eyes start to move away, but she remembered what he'd asked and kept her gaze to his. Leaning in slightly he touched his lips to her ear. "I like knowing how ready you are for me, knowing I could slide inside you right this second." Drawing back he felt her hands on his shoulders tremble.

Her head was swimming and her breathing was ragged. Ziva had to grip harder at his shoulders feeling fabric covered muscle bunch beneath her fingers. His thumb brushed over her nipple and she couldn't stop from crying out.

"There are times I think about doing this to you at work, far too often I think of pulling you into that office again. I think about bending you over a desk and taking you from behind. Somehow I always manage to stop myself but I still think about it." Gibbs was barely touching her just letting his hand skim over her body with feather light touches here and there. He could feel her arousal growing, heat poured from her and he stepped just the slightest bit closer. "If I wanted you to take off all your clothes and let me take you there in an office at work you would let me wouldn't you?"

Ziva felt his barely-there touch and wanted to scream at him to touch her for real, to demand he give her what she wanted instead she met his fierce blue gaze and nodded. It was the only answer she could give, the truth of wanting him inside her anywhere they were. "Yes."

Gibbs felt his body harden more than he thought possible, yet he remained in control. His hand brought her hip just barely into contact with his cloth covered erection, she whimpered and he watched her eyes go liquid with need. The morning light caught the gold of her bracelet and he traced the intricate weave, letting his other hand weave the same pattern on her belly dipping agonizingly low. He watched her struggle to continue to meet his gaze. "Knowing you're mine is like nothing else Ziva."

Deliciously calloused hands slipped over the curve of her hip, sliding around to just inside her mid-thigh. Ziva moved just slightly encouraging him let his hand drift higher. To her frustration his hand stayed at the midway point tracing circles in the wetness he found there. "Please.."

Gibbs saw the faint sheen of a sweat break out on her body and knew she was close. His own body trembled with the need to be inside her but he wanted something else more. "Patience Ziva I fully intend to give you what I want, but my way."

Ziva felt that voice slide over her, his fingers dancing over her flesh and almost gave a demand of her own. Instead she remained hands on his shoulders, legs aching trusting in him. "Neshama." Just saying the word made her body clench even harder, he had to know what he was doing to her the proof was under his fingers.

"I love you even more every time you say that Ziva. It makes me want to wrap myself around you and never let go." Gibbs stepped just another breath closer letting his body brush up against her breasts, that simple touch had her gasping. His hand grasped her hip holding there even as her hips teased against him in desperation. He tugged again at her hair, forcing her head back and letting his mouth claim the satin of her collarbone. She was taking short gasping breaths, mewling low in her throat and pushing against his hand at her hip. Gently he nipped at the silken skin that tasted of a spice uniquely her own.

Ziva felt the cotton of his shirt brush against her sensitive skin, the firm pressure on her hip and the gentle tease of his bite and it was all too much. Her body flew apart, her muscles clenching, her womb tightening all while crying out his name. The fire in her burned hard and drove over her in waves crashing in on her as Gibbs lowered her to the bed behind them. She was just starting to feel the soft aftershocks, when Gibbs somehow free of clothing slid inside her seating himself fully in one swift stroke. The shock brought her back to ecstasy without so much as time to take a breath. One hand cupped her face, again forcing their gazes together and even as the force of the moment swept over her she could see it in his eyes as well. Ice blue darkened to flame blue; she could see the pleasure that worked its way over him making him tighten his grip on her. A firm push of his hips and they were both lost, white hot fire rushing through them both.

It could have been minutes or hours later when Ziva was finally able to breathe normally. She was shaking not just from the pleasure but from what he'd been able to do to her. Turning in his arms she found him watching her, again, she couldn't stop the blush that washed over her and almost looked away, stopping only by will.

Gibbs watched her trying to come to terms with what had happened between them. He knew then that she'd never experienced such a thing before. He drew her tighter in his arms waiting for her to say something.

"How, Jethro?" She swallowed took a breath "With you it's been easier than ever before in my life, no struggle or feeling left behind but just now. I ….."

Gibbs digested her words, they left him with questions but for now he would answer hers. "When you give over control Ziva it can be very stimulating. Add to that you trust me, if you didn't you wouldn't have responded the way you did." He saw something flicker in her eyes, just as quickly it was gone but not before he knew what had been lurking there. "I've never made another woman come without touching her before Ziva. Just you."

Ziva bit her lip feeling guilty that he'd been able to see where her thoughts had gone. "I wasn't going to ask Jethro."

Gibbs smiled and stroked her hair, "But you wondered and I never want you to feel like you can't ask anything you want to know."

Glancing at the clock behind him he saw it was nearing noon. "We should probably finish getting ready to go. I need to run an errand for a bit but I'll be back in time for us to leave."

Ziva stretched enjoying the view as Gibbs made his way, nude, to the bathroom. "I would join you but I think you would not get to those errands if I did." She heard his chuckle and smiled.

_havenhavenhavenhaven_

Gibbs sat outside his lawyer's office, grateful Sawyer had been able to fit him in as he'd asked. He was healthy, with no reason to be here, except a dangerous job and a woman he loved. There was another reason but for now he pushed that particular omission aside and walked into Sawyer's office.

Sawyer Reed had been his friend for years, fielding him through the loss of Shannon and Kelly, three divorces and everything in between. When Gibbs had called him a week earlier he'd heard the surprise in his voice the unasked question and known he'd be giving the answers today. Sawyer had agreed to see him on a weekend understanding his need for privacy. Gibbs stepped into his office and grinned at the casual jeans that were so the Sawyer he'd always known. "Hey."

Sawyer looked up and was shocked at Gibbs' appearance. In all the years he'd known Jethro he'd never seen him look so rested or so happy. His concerns took a back seat when Gibbs sank in a chair across from his desk and propped his feet on top. "Hey yourself, I was going to ask if you were okay but I'm thinking I don't need to."

Gibbs couldn't stop another grin. He'd known that Sawyer's first question would be regarding his health. "I'm as healthy as I can be Sawyer, that's not why I came."

"You said you wanted to change your will Jethro, other than basic addendums you've never done that before. You can't be surprised I'm curious."

Gibbs looked at Sawyer in silence for a long moment. The man was right even during his marriages he hadn't changed his will but then he'd never been in the position he was now. He had money, too much money for a man like him. Shannon had come from a somewhat wealthy family, and an even wealthier grandfather. When she'd turned twenty five she'd inherited a trust she hadn't been aware of when they'd married. They had intended to save it for Kelly content to live on what he made. The money had remained untouched.

"I want you to rewrite my will keep everything the same regarding my dad. I want him taken care of but the rest I want to go to someone else. " Gibbs pulled out a piece of paper with all of Ziva's information on it. Sliding it across the desk he waited for Sawyer's inevitable reaction.

Sawyer looked at the paper recognized the name and didn't bother to hide his shock when he looked back up at Gibbs. "I won't ask if you're sure but care to share the details?"

"She is…what I didn't know I was looking for with the others." Gibbs swallowed and played with a paperweight from Sawyer's desk. " I want it written so that should there be any children they are taken care of as well. I don't know how that works, but should anything happen to both of us." Gibbs trailed off feeling his stomach clench as he spoke. The idea of losing Ziva or leaving behind a child was unthinkable.

Sawyer saw a shudder pass through Gibbs and was reminded how they had met. He'd been the one to inform Gibbs and Shannon of the trust she'd received. Neither of them had reacted as he would have predicted. Gibbs had been cautious and Shannon hadn't wanted to touch the money. She had been proud to be the wife of a marine and saw the money as a way to provide for Kelly's future. The money had remained untouched since then. Even when Kelly and Shannon had passed Gibbs had refused to speak of it. Sawyer had learned not to mention it after a while. "I can do that. You'll have to come back once I draw the papers up, it has to be witnessed. Does she know?"

Gibbs smiled glancing at Sawyer understanding he had to ask. "She doesn't know anything about the money or that I'm here. In fact Ziva would probably be pissed as hell if she did know. We aren't legally married so if something happened to me she wouldn't have anything from me. I want more for her."

Sawyer thought long and hard before responding. "I know you tried to give that money back to Shannon's family. I always wondered why they wouldn't accept it."

Gibbs stared out the window. "They didn't want the reminder any more than I did. Later her mother told me what had been Shannon's was mine as it should be between a husband and wife. This might not make sense but Shannon would want me to do this. I can't put it into words how I know that just that I do."

Sawyer took a deep breath. "I don't know Ziva but I've heard you talk about her, I see how she makes you feel and I _know_ Shannon would. She was a beautiful soul Gibbs and she would have wanted you to be happy, this kind of happy."

Gibbs let out the breath he hadn't known he was holding. Sawyer was the one person in his life who could know the answer. He'd known Shannon since they were teenagers. He'd arraigned her funeral in Gibbs' absence, mourned her loss nearly as deeply as Gibbs. "Thank you for that." Glancing at his watch he realized he was in danger of being late if didn't get moving. "I have to go, but thanks again."

Sawyer walked Gibbs to the door "When do I get to meet her?"

Gibbs had been waiting for this "What about dinner on Friday. We'll bring the food but it's easier if we come to your place. We have to be discreet as you can imagine."

Sawyer smirked "You and your need to push the edge. That sounds good, but I'll grill you bring the other stuff."

_havenhavenhavenhavenhaven_

Gibbs drove content with the silence that had settled between him and Ziva. She was doing something on an electronic tablet, every now and then she would mutter in frustration curse in Hebrew making him wonder. "What are you doing?"

"Killing pigs, with birds. It is harder than one would think. It is a game Tony showed me." She sighed and turned the tablet off. She saw him smirk. "What?"

"Never figured you for a video game kind of girl Zi."

He saw her head swing towards him frustration clear in her expression, "First I am not a girl, as you well know secondly I wish Tony had not shown them to me they are far to addicting."

Gibbs laughed "Trust me Ziva I have no doubt just how much woman you are and I promise to keep you distracted enough that you won't think about playing video games anymore."

Ziva smiled at that and let her hand find his. "We should talk about how we are going to handle tonight."

Gibbs took his eyes off the road just long enough to glance at her. "Worried?"

"Not worried but it is a mission like any other and we have not gotten around to discussing the details." She blushed when his look reminded her of just what kept distracting them.

"Since they want to meet at an Inn I imagine we'll have dinner in a private room. They'll go in depth with just what the rules are, give us whatever key or identification is necessary. After that is when I think it will start to get complicated. As for how we act, I'd say just like us. We're in the habit of being cautious and keeping this to ourselves. They will expect that."

"Do you think it will be safe for us to be seen together tonight? Outside of dinner I mean. We took a very big risk going to the club that night and we are lucky it was Holly Snow we ran into. It was a necessary risk but I still worry what would happen…" Ziva stopped talking not liking how her words sounded.

"If we got caught Ziva? For the purposes of the case it would be a problem, getting invited in as quick as it was still took time and those missing couples need to be found. That has to be our priority from now on. If it weren't for that to be honest I think I'd like getting caught with you." He saw her flush and look at him in surprise. "So to speak."

Ziva thought about what he'd said for much of the rest of the drive. They drove around the horseshoe driveway parking in front of the Inns entrance. Gibbs glanced at the door then back at Ziva, "Understand Ziva regardless of what we have to do to close this case the fact I love you will not change." He took her hand and fixed her gaze with his. "I'm grateful for the time we've had to be together just us; it's given us time to understand what we mean to each other."

Ziva saw him pause trying to find the words. "I understand Jethro, I know that this case could make things difficult between us but remember I am yours and what I feel for you will not change."

Gibbs could hear the determination and honesty in her voice. He leaned in giving her a kiss. Stepping out of the car together they faced the Inn and whatever came next.


	13. In THe Beginning There is the Middle

_So I know everyone wants them to get to Haven NOW but this story has a mind of its own and it may be a bit before they actually get there. However I think you'll like where the next few chapters will take our pair…;)_

Gibbs gave his name at the front desk of the inn, asking if there were any messages for him. The concierge looked through a book and said their party was waiting in the penthouse. As they were escorted up the elevator his senses went on high alert. Beside him he felt Ziva do the same. Regardless of what they had been told it was hard not to become suspicious. The doors slid open and he felt rather than saw Ziva stroke the hilt of the knife hidden at her hip. He stroked her hand for a moment trying to reassure her as they stepped into the luxurious room. Their escort gave a small nod of the head and stepped back into the elevator.

Ziva watched the doors slide shut and hid her wariness with a smile she directed at Gibbs. Only when the elevator had begun making its way down did a man step out from what appeared to be the kitchen area of the penthouse. Ziva tightened her hand in Gibbs'. The man was tall but still slightly shorter than Gibbs; he had dark hair liberally sprinkled with grey and a hawkish nose that gave him a slightly birdlike appearance. Still her instincts didn't scream anything negative at her so she tried for a smile.

"Gibbs, Ziva please relax, today is just the formality of getting you acquainted with Haven. I'm Andrew Locke. Before you ask I'm not military, although I've been part of Haven since I was a very young man." He held out his hand to Gibbs returning the firm grip and then turning to Ziva to offer his hand.

Ziva couldn't say why but she looked to Gibbs first silently asking him if she should offer her hand. He didn't miss a beat merely nodded to her and then looked back to Andrew. Ziva accepted his handshake then slid her hand in the pocket of her dress.

Andrew watched Ziva then looked to Gibbs, deciding as usual that discretion was needed he refrained from commenting. "Let's step into the dining room."

They followed Andrew into the dining room where a meal had been laid out. Ziva couldn't help her mind from running to drinks laced with truth serum and poisoned food. A scenario she'd experienced more than once and had to swallow hard. Gibbs paused in mid-step beside her and she knew she hadn't hid her trepidation as well as she might have liked.

"Ziva?" Gibbs was no fool Ziva's instincts were rarely wrong and he'd felt her hand tremble in his.

Ziva felt slightly guilty, it was her memories not her instincts screaming at her and this wasn't the time or the place for them. Andrew was watching them both and again she felt no threat from him. "It is nothing Jethro, only another time and place."

Gibbs saw the faint hint of shame flush across her face and instantly understood. Uncaring that Andrew stood there waiting for them he ran a hand across her cheek. "We can leave now Ziva."

Ziva met his soft blue gaze and knew he meant what he was saying. She smiled and pushed away the fear. "I am fine just a bit of nerves." They spoke quietly but it would have been impossible in such a small room for Andrew not to hear them.

Andrew cleared his throat and sat down first. He waited while Gibbs pulled out a chair for Ziva and then claimed the one right beside her, putting himself between the two of them. "Normally when I handle these meetings I try to start off with small talk in your case I'd like to do things a little differently. " Andrew was grateful for the intense research that went into selecting those allowed into Haven. He took the bottle of wine sitting on the table and handed it along with a corkscrew to Gibbs. "Why don't you open this while I go over some things."

Gibbs didn't hide his careful inspection of the securely sealed bottle. Beside him he felt Ziva relax slightly.

"First as I'm sure you already know when someone is being considered for Haven they are fully investigated. This goes whether it's a couple or a single individual. We read everything we can about them. As a group we decide if someone is a risk or can be trusted. With the two of you there were many different considerations. You both have colorful pasts" Andrew swallowed at the look Ziva gave him but chuckled anyways. "It's not an insult just a factor we had to take into consideration. We read psychological profiles, performance reviews etc. The Admiral was only given the ok to invite you in once we had decided as a group that you would be able to keep Haven to yourselves."

Ziva watched as Gibbs poured three glasses of wine handing the first to Andrew. "Surprised we made the cut."

Andrew knew Gibbs was testing him taking the wine he took a long swallow. "If our intention was to drug you, harm you or anything of the like Gibbs we have had many opportunities before now. As I'm sure you can imagine. "

Ziva took the glass Gibbs offered and pushing aside her fear took a sip "We suspected for some time now we were being followed."

Andrew smiled "We weren't as subtle as we should have been with the two of you. But then the two of you weren't as careful as you could have been."

Gibbs heard the question in his voice. "We had no reason to believe we would be watched or caught. No one has had reason to suspect we are anything but colleagues." Gibbs glanced to Ziva and took a calculated risk. "It's still new to us, being together. "

Andrew had already known this but was glad to hear it from Gibbs "We suspected as much. Normally that would give us a reason to wait but it's clear to us that the two of you are committed to each other." He let them think on that a minute while serving up the meal.

Ziva watched Andrew for a long moment before speaking "Why were we chosen, I am curious as to how you make such a decision."

Andrew had been expecting these questions. "It usually begins with another member making a recommendation. In your case Gibbs your friend Cal made the recommendation. Once your name was raised The Admiral who you are also friendly with seconded the idea. Once it was confirmed that your relationship was legitimate the rest was just the follow up work." Andrew caught the anger that skirted from Gibbs to him and the blush on Ziva's cheeks when he mentioned confirming the relationship.

"As you can imagine Mr. Locke we didn't appreciate the "confirmation" process. We are very private people." Gibbs took a bite of his steak carefully tasting it for anything out of the ordinary. Andrew did the same, only when Gibbs was certain as he could be did he let his hand brush Ziva's thigh indicating it was safe to eat. She gave him a brief smile and started on her own steak.

Andrew grimaced and couldn't quite look at Ziva. "And as I'm sure you can understand it is a necessary part of this type of business. In all the years of Haven the evidence we gather has never been used for blackmail purposes." He saw the shared look of disbelief they gave him. "At any given time Haven has around five hundred members. They all have something to lose, the few of us that head up the selection process are at equal risk should blackmail become a regular thing. We would be the first suspected, many of the people at Haven are dangerous and we really have no wish to make them angry."

"Then why do it at all?" Gibbs knew his voice came out a bit too abrupt and found his hand searching for Ziva's. He barely had to move and there she was.

Andrew quietly studied them as he spoke, "It started small decades ago. A group of men wanting privacy for their girlfriends, different ranks wanting to date as you know isn't always feasible. It grew from there to what it is now. Currently in this area there are six estates. To the public they are celebrity owned private homes. In reality they have been converted to a place where members can go and have true privacy. Each one has a theater of some sort, a restaurant, entertainment, rooms nearly anything you can imagine. The biggest secret of Haven is it's everywhere. Nearly every state and many countries have Haven estates." Andrew almost smiled when he saw that caught their attention.

Gibbs looked to Ziva and saw she had the same surprised look he must. "Cal never mentioned any of this. We meet for beer now and then and I always wondered how he managed to keep his private life so private."

Andrew nodded in approval. "That of course is one of the rules, nearly the most important one; you can't speak of Haven to anyone who is not a member. That is why selections are so carefully made." He didn't mention that after a previous meeting Cal had with Gibbs Cal had been followed for some time just in case.

"I can't imagine it is easy to keep such a secret." Ziva pushed her empty plate away, the meal had been delicious.

"Not at first for some, but, it gets easier and for others it's easy when you consider what's at stake." Andrew stood up from the table and stepped toward the kitchen standing in front of the coffee pot he pushed a button and It began brewing. "it will be hard for you to accept but we have no ulterior motives, Haven exists because there is a need for it. Funding comes through donations, grants and to be fair some creative bookkeeping, nothing outright illegal just creative. No member of Haven is required to contribute money of any kind, nor will you ever be asked to do anything amoral or illegal. If at any time you are approached or asked anything of the kind, you are asked to let one of the council members know. Every estate has a board with their names listed and there is always at least one member available. The next thing you will need to bear in mind is that Haven does not discriminate, judge or decide what types of relationships are allowed in. At any given time you may encounter heterosexual, homosexual relationships, often there are men that bring their wives one week and a mistress the next. Whatever your opinion about this is we ask that you keep it to yourselves. The only time the council steps in is in the case of abuse." He had to work hard not to think about the three missing couples he didn't dare mention, at least not yet. He'd been hopeful when Cal had approached the council with Gibbs and Ziva's membership. He still remained hopeful that at some point they could be trusted to help with finding out what had happened. Still, he hadn't shared this hope with anyone.

Gibbs glanced at Ziva, he'd already considered much of what Andrew had said and from the look on her face so had Ziva. Mentally he head slapped himself she was right they hadn't talked enough about the case. After tonight he was going to have to get a hold on his libido so they could. He watched her smirk and wondered how she always knew what he was thinking. "We have no intention of judging other people's choices. We didn't even know about Haven until recently, plus it's not exactly our place to judge."

Ziva nodded in agreement. She remained quiet, but with a purpose. She had begun by observing the room, and followed it up with a careful observation of Andrew. It gave her insight into just how cautious those that ran Haven were.

Andrew stepped to a table and from a drawer pulled out a packet of information. "We've provided you with ID, paperwork and a passcode that will get you into any Haven estate. The passcodes change from time to time but that information is provided when that happens. Should you lose any of this it's important you inform a council member. Also included, is a listing of the various estates and a few more rules and regulations. We've covered most of it but I'm sure you'll have more questions."

Ziva glanced at the papers and laminated ID's "That simple, seems hard to believe."

Andrew smiled. "Not simple at all just streamlined after the vetting process. It will take some getting used to." In all his years doing the intakes for Haven he'd only had a few people as reluctant to believe as the two he sat before now. They all had similar questions, the initial disbelief but these two seemed even more cautious.

Gibbs held onto the papers "We're not ungrateful, just suspicious by nature, goes with the territory as you can imagine. "

Andrew just nodded knowing that very suspicion might be just what Haven needed.

_Havenhavenhavenhavenhaven_

Tony sat at the table of his favorite pub enjoying the game on the T.V. in the corner. From a distance he might have looked lonely but in reality he wasn't bothered by it. He took a long sip on his beer when he felt the hairs rise on the back of his neck. From the corner of his eye he saw Hollis Mann enter the pub and subtly search the building. He was far too well trained not to figure out she was looking for him. It hadn't needed to be said that she and Gibbs weren't getting back together. Gibbs' mood when she'd walked into the office had spoken volumes. His rough mood when he'd returned from their lunch had further led him to believe there would be no reconciliation. So why then would she be looking for him?

Hollis didn't like the driving need to find out who Gibbs was seeing, yet she couldn't overcome it. She would have to bide her very short amount of time before driving by his house again knowing he would be watching. She had opted instead to "accidentally" run into Tony and see what information she could gain from him. Making her way through the bar she pretended to only just notice him. "Tony! What a surprise, I was supposed to meet someone here but it looks like she's running late. How are you?"

Tony took the briefest moment to decide how to let things play out. He decided finding out what she was up to was more important than Gibbs' privacy at this point. "Hollis, I'm good. Care to join me till your friend shows up?"

Hollis slid into the chair opposite Tony. "Thanks, my friend is notorious for being late or forgetting to show up all together. She's somewhat flighty."

Tony could only nod at the ridiculous lie, taking another sip of beer. "So how much longer are you in town?"

Hollis inwardly hid a frown, sometimes Tony and Gibbs were far too alike. "Not quite a week. I could stay longer if I wanted to. I'm not sure what my plans are."

Somehow deep in his gut, the one he always listened to he knew this wasn't good news for Gibbs. "I thought you liked Hawaii. I can't imagine choosing D.C. over paradise any day."

"Even paradise can get lonely Tony." Hollis cleared her throat "I'm sure Gibbs mentioned that I came back to see him to see if he might be interested in getting back together."

Tony didn't bother to say that Gibbs hadn't mentioned anything about his lunch with her; it was easier to let her believe what she wanted. Instead he just raised an eyebrow. "Not being rude Hollis but it was my impression things hadn't ended well. Nothing that was said just from what I could figure on my own."

Hollis winced but smiled and continued. "I just needed to be more patient with Gibbs, I realized that a little too late. I came back to tell him but, at lunch he informed me he's involved with someone, apparently it's serious. His words not mine." To her dismay she watched both surprise and shock pass over Tony's face. She'd hoped he might be able to give her a clue as to who Gibbs was seeing his face told her that wouldn't be happening.

Tony almost choked on his swallow of beer. Either Gibbs was leading Hollis on to keep her away which didn't seem likely or he had someone in his life no one knew about. Was he the only one not dating? McGee was seeing someone, Ziva had a mystery man and now Gibbs was apparently in a relationship. Glancing at Hollis he saw her trying to hide disappointment. It dawned on him then why she'd sought him out. She'd wanted information. "I had no idea, but then Gibbs likes to keep things private." He watched her purse her lips and then force a smile.

"That is very much Gibbs. I know it's wrong of me to mention it to you, I guess I just wanted to see what my competition is like." She watched Tony smirk and had to hide her anger at that look. Breathing deep she feigned a casual interest. "Why the look Tony?"

Tony knew he had to step carefully now, whatever she believed Hollis was not hiding her anger well. He was going to have to call Gibbs and he wasn't looking forward to that conversation. "Again not to be rude Hollis but if Gibbs used the word serious, then there is no competition. Gibbs is a man who knows what he wants and nothing stops him from getting it." He drank more of his beer pretending not to notice the fury that crossed her face then was quickly hidden.

"I'm just surprised, Gibbs wasn't interested in anything involving a commitment." She forced a wistful sigh "I guess it's a good thing I'm heading back to Hawaii soon." Glancing at her watch she pretended to be shocked by the time. "Wow, I guess my friend isn't going to show after all. I think I'm going to go. Do me a favor don't mention our conversation to Gibbs, it's a bit embarrassing."

Tony gave her a sympathetic nod, just waiting for her to leave. "Nothing to say really. Sorry things didn't go the way you'd hoped, I've been there." He watched her leave but remained at the table. He'd wait another twenty minutes or so before leaving. Something about Hollis Mann told him she wasn't entirely stable. When he talked to Gibbs he didn't want anyone watching or listening, neither did he wish to make himself a target.

_Havenhavenhavenhaven_

Gibbs lay next to Ziva on the hood of his car staring at the stars and feeling like a teenager again. They held hands enjoying the quiet. They were both digesting the meeting with Andrew. The seriousness of what they could encounter had hit them full force once again. Having decided against staying at the Inn, they'd slid into his car and drove until finding an open field where they could park. He chuckled at his own thoughts.

Ziva grinned at the sky. "Is this what Americans call parking?"

Gibbs turned to look at her in the darkness "I swear Ziva sometimes I think you can read minds." Scooting closer to her he heard her giggle. "Yes this is referred to as parking, though normally it involves being in the car and far more touching." Rather than the intimate touch he was referencing he whispered his fingers over the strip of skin just under her neck. She started laughing at his tickling immediately.

"Hey they do not do that in the movies." Rather than stopping she felt Gibbs intensify his tickling, till she was laughing loud enough to disturb the birds from their nests.

Gibbs heard his phone ring; glancing at the caller ID he saw it was Tony. He attempted to warn Ziva as he answered but she had decided to retaliate with some heavy handed tickling of her own, only he ducked and she ended up sliding off the car. She landed with a thump, a curse and gales of laughter so strong he couldn't stop his own. He heard Tony calling his name but for the life of him he couldn't stop laughing.

Tony held the phone away from his ear, stared at the screen making sure he'd dialed the correct number. The read out showed he'd connected with Gibbs' phone and that was definitely Gibbs laughing. In the background he heard muffled female laughter and then the sound of Gibbs shushing someone.

Ziva held her stomach trying to reign in her laughter, only to see Gibbs laughing at her, snaking her hand up she grabbed his hand and yanked him off the car to the ground beside her. Only to late did she see him attempting to shush her. It wasn't till he held up his phone and Tony's name showed on the caller ID that she was able to sober enough for him to talk on the phone. When he cleared his throat and attempted to answer with his normal stern "Gibbs" she erupted into giggles again. Somehow she managed to muffle them in his shirt but it was a struggle

Gibbs glared at her and held the phone to his shoulder "Brat, behave." Again she started laughing and he had to work even harder to hold in his own mirth. Pulling up from the grass he stepped away finally focusing on the phone and Tony. "Sorry about that Dinozzo. Everything ok?"

Hearing Gibbs laugh was out of the ordinary, hearing muffled female laughter verified what Hollis had told him, but the really intriguing part was Gibbs calling someone a brat. The affection in his tone was telling. "Hey boss. Are you home? I have something I need to tell you."

Gibbs heard the seriousness in Tony's voice and knew it must be evident in his own from the way Ziva stood and leaned against the car. "I'm out won't be back till tomorrow some time. Whatever it is I'm guessing I'm not going to like it."

Tony pondered that but continued. "I ran into Hollis Mann tonight, or rather she ran into me. She was asking questions about who you're seeing." He heard Gibbs curse, a woman murmur in the background and another curse.

"I'm sorry you had to deal with her. I thought I had taken care of things." Gibbs ran a hand through his hair, not looking at Ziva but at the field around them.

"Not worried about it Gibbs. I gotta tell you though she doesn't seem all that stable for lack of a better word. I obviously didn't know anything, which she wasn't happy about but she tried to cover it." Tony didn't like having this conversation.

"That's an understatement she's been casing my house, talked to her about it but she didn't get the message." Gibbs couldn't say why he told Tony only that he did. "I'll be back tomorrow let's grab a beer and we can talk then. If she shows up again let me know."

Tony was shocked at the idea of Hollis sitting outside Gibbs' house but refrained from commenting. It was clear Gibbs wanted to table the discussion for now. "No problem, see you tomorrow." Tony hung up the phone and stared at it for a long moment. It appeared Gibbs had trouble headed his way.


	14. Boundaries and Open Doors

Ziva held Gibbs' free hand while he drove them toward home. They hadn't stayed at the Inn the night before instead opting for a small motel closer to home. When he'd woken up this morning she'd suggested heading back early.

"We still have the better part of the day Ziva." Gibbs couldn't see any anger on her face. After he'd hung up the phone with Dinozzo the night before, he'd expected Ziva to question him. She had every right, he'd felt the air heavy with her indecision. Yet, to his surprise she had only pulled him into her arms and held him for a long moment. Somehow she'd known in that moment that was exactly what he'd needed. For now it seemed she too wanted to push away all the things that could wait and enjoy this time.

"And we can take our time getting home but there are some things I really should take care of today. I tend to let things slide just to be with you." She hadn't intended to slide back into the bed with him, but knowing he was naked beneath the sheets had been too much.

Gibbs watched Ziva cat-crawl across the bed towards him and swallowed hard. Ziva was damn beautiful, and the tiny blue sundress she was wearing rode dangerously high on her thigh as she made her way toward him. "You're not the only one Ziva." She pushed the sheet aside her hand tugging gently on the key he wore.

"I love that I am the only who sees this. Belonging to you makes me feel complete, as though the part of me that I did not know was missing is finally there." Ziva felt him hard against her thigh though the fabric of her dress.

Gibbs ran his finger along the gold wrapped around her wrist. "And seeing this every day makes me proud. Yes the missing is definitely gone." Her hands slid between them her mouth working magic on his neck. As good as it felt something in her manner made him hold her slightly away. "What's wrong Ziva?"

She should have known he would sense her unease he could read her far too well. "Just a bad dream Jethro." She bit her lip looking away for a second then back into his blue eyes. "I do not want to lose you."

Gibbs didn't get to see this side of Ziva very often. When she shared her vulnerability it never failed to make his heart clench. "Zi, we're okay. I can't promise nothing bad will ever happen. But I can't imagine losing you either so I'm not going to be doing anything stupid. You sure as hell aren't going to lose me to Hollis Mann and I don't want to be with anyone but you." He saw her flush, and knew he'd hit the mark.

Ziva nodded against his hand in her hair. "Thank you for not laughing at me."

"Zi, if something worries you never hesitate to tell me." He shifted till she was beneath him, "You think I don't have my own fears Ziva. At least once a day I wonder what the hell you're doing with me. Sometimes I wonder if you might change your mind, find some younger guy." He saw a tear slide down her cheek. Pressing a kiss there he felt the very slightest sob shake her.

Ziva held him close savoring the intimacy of the moment that was about more than sex. "I do not want anyone but you Jethro. I am yours as long as you'll have me."

Gibbs knew she meant it, had said as much before but hearing it again soothed his wounded heart yet again. "And I'm yours just as long Zi. I wish I could offer you more a better commitment, I can't even offer to let you live with me."

Ziva smiled up at him seeing the genuine frustration in him. "Neshama it is enough to know you love me. What we have is enough. I have always known who you were Jethro. I have no regrets. Just some bad dreams now and then."

Jethro felt the truth in her words but still dammed the situation, the things in his past that made him the man he was. He wondered if she knew if it weren't for the damn case he'd say screw the job and never spend another night without her.

/

Ziva stared into the rearview mirror of her car, not fully recognizing the woman in front of her. It made her smile despite what she was about to do. The snug black shirt and jeans were like a second skin. Her hair pulled tightly back from her face. She looked every bit the warrior she was. Only the bracelet on her wrist was at odds with the lethal image she projected. Weapons carefully hidden she made her way through the parking garage quietly. She made her way unseen to her destination slipping through the door without making a sound. In the dark of the room she waited.

Gibbs pulled a beer out and handed it over to Tony. The younger man was watching him but not saying anything. Gibbs might have smiled if it weren't for the nature of their conversation.

"Hollis was not pleased when I told her I wasn't interested in picking things up where we left off." Gibbs was not the kind of man that shared much about his personal life but Tony had been dragged into it and deserved an explanation. Or, at least as much of an explanation as he could give him.

"She made that very clear. I'm surprised she thought I would by her act. She was definitely fishing for information on who you are seeing. She was more than a little disappointed when she realized I had no clue what she was talking about." Tony watched Gibbs give him a half-grin it caught him off guard.

Gibbs saw the questions Tony had but wasn't sure how to answer them. "Been seeing someone for a while now, not something I usually talk about."

Tony laughed "No surprise there. Gibbs I don't need to know your business but she's not happy. She told me you said it was "serious" and dammed if that word didn't piss her off."

Gibbs took a long sip of beer, "It is serious. Which is why Hollis needs to be dealt with. I'm just not quite sure how to do that." He almost laughed at the shock on Tony's face.

Hollis walked into her hotel room still feeling frustrated. She driven by Gibbs' house enough times this weekend to know he must have gone out of town. Now he was finally home and Tony's car sat parked outside. It shot her plans to hell. She'd worn a too-die for dress intent on seducing Gibbs. Just one more night with him and she knew he'd remember how good things had been. She stepped out of her shoes and stood in front of the mirror removing her earrings. She felt her heart slam in her chest when suddenly someone was standing behind her. The slamming came faster when she recognized Ziva.

"Ziva, you scared the hell out of me." Hollis turned to face her but was even more unsteady when Ziva only smiled.

"That was my intention." Ziva stood there calm, steady hands behind her back, legs at ready stance. "It is not pleasant to find out you are being watched I imagine."

Hollis felt a cold sweat break out on her body. Gibbs must have mentioned that she had been watching his house, but why would he do that?

Tony took a risk sticking his nose where it didn't belong. "Never thought I'd hear you talk about being serious with anyone Boss."

Gibbs could have ignored Tony gone back to talking about how to deal with Hollis but he had few friends and he considered Tony one of them. "Me either, but she's undeniable. Has been since I met her."

Something nagged at Tony, he was missing something and he couldn't catch what it was. "She's a lucky woman than." He caught Gibbs surprised look and laughed.

"I'm the lucky one DiNozzo, damn lucky." Gibbs took another sip of beer sighed and looked back to Tony. "Hollis on the other hand not so lucky there. I'm open to suggestions." Gibbs grabbed two more beers and glanced out the window. No one appeared to be watching him but his gut was churning suddenly, telling him something wasn't right.

Tony accepted the beer, thought for a minute then laughed. "You could always leave her in a room alone with Ziva.".

Somehow Gibbs managed to laugh along with Tony, hiding the realization that hit him as Tony spoke. He knew now what his gut had been trying to tell him.

"Look Ziva what's going on between Gibbs and I is personal." She stopped speaking when Ziva only smiled again. When she stepped a hair closer Hollis had to work hard not to step back.

"There is nothing going on between you and Gibbs this I know. You would do well to let that sink in." Ziva felt anger rush through her, working hard not to let it show.

Hollis knew in that moment why Ziva was there. The real fear hit her then, it was followed by disbelief and anger but the fear overrode everything. Stepping back she bumped the dresser and was forced to stop moving. "It can't be."

"Deny what you will Hollis, but know this he is mine. I will not allow you to continue with the delusion that he wants you back. When Jethro wants something nothing on this earth can stop him from having it." Ziva pulled the knife from her hip and for drama's sake cleaned her nails. "When something is mine I let no one take it from me."

Hollis took a deep shuddering breath, transfixed by the blade in Ziva's hand. She knew full well what this woman was capable of. All thoughts of trying to win Gibbs back fled from her mind, replaced by the desire to walk out of this room alive. "Are you going to kill me?"

Ziva watched Hollis impassively, hiking an eyebrow as though thinking about it. "I have killed for less reason than how I feel about him." She watched Hollis swallow hard and smiled stepping closer. "I don't intend to kill you Hollis, just make it very clear to you that you are no longer welcome here." Reaching into one of her pockets she pulled out a piece of paper and held it out to Hollis. She almost laughed when the other woman flinched before taking it.

Hollis looked at the paper in disbelief. Reading over the facts of her daily life in Hawaii she had to lean hard against the dresser "How…"

Ziva done cleaning her nails, twirled the knife lazily in one hand. "I have my sources; you have a very predictable routine. I hear that little restaurant you visit on Fridays has great fish."

Hollis kept staring at the paper, trying not to look at the woman in front of her. That damn cool demeanor terrified her. "I'll leave him alone." And she knew she would.

"See that you do. There is a flight back to Hawaii in four hours, see that you are on it." Ziva stepped even closer till she could see the tears threatening in Hollis' eyes. "Do not come back, I have only so much restraint."

Hollis closed her eyes just for a moment trying to get those angry dark eyes out of her head. When she opened them again Ziva was gone and she sank to the floor in relief.

Tony shrugged "I have no doubt you'll figure it out boss. I should go I actually have a date." It was a lie but he wasn't going to tell Gibbs that he was going to go home and play video games.

Gibbs wasn't fooled he could see the frustration on Tony's face. He remembered that face from before Ziva. "Have fun." He watched Tony drive off gut still churning waiting for Ziva to call him.

Ziva had left Hollis' hotel room high on the adrenaline of the moment. Once she'd gotten into her car the high had worn off and she'd been left with the knowledge of what she'd done. She'd threatened someone Gibbs had once cared for, what kind of person did that make her? Grabbing her phone she called him, when he picked up on the first ring she knew he'd been waiting. "Jethro has Tony left."

"He's gone. Come over."

Gibbs watched her walk through his door saw the clothing she was wearing and knew he'd been right about where she'd been. She closed the door behind her but didn't come any closer. She only lifted her chin as though waiting for him to reprimand her. "I did not harm her Jethro, I never even touched her."

Gibbs smiled despite the situation. "Do I look worried?"

Ziva had been watching him for any trace of anger, finding none she moved closer. "She will not be a problem any longer."

Gibbs cleared his throat knowing nothing about the situation was funny but somehow was amused anyways. He almost wished he'd been a fly on the wall. "Of that I have no doubt."

Ziva saw him fighting back a laugh and cocked her head. "What do you find so funny?"

"Just remind me not to piss you off ZI, thinking it wouldn't be good for my health." Pulling her up against him, he felt the cold steel of the knife at her hip and felt a familiar rush of desire hit him. Reaching behind her he pulled the tie from her hair freeing it from its braid.

Ziva saw the shift in him, the change in the way he touched her and reveled in it. She had expected questions, perhaps a reprimand not this beautiful acceptance. "Neshama, I love you."

"Love you back, more than I can tell you Zi." He felt his control slip his desire take over and he pushed her against the wall with more force than he intended. Her responding chuckle was heavy with need. "Seems with you I lose control easily."

"No need for control with me Neshama." She felt his hips push against her roughly, forcing her further against the wood. The feel of him hard and ready through their clothing was nearly her undoing. "More…"

Gibbs gave up trying to be gentle, pulling the shirt from her he threw it on the ground. They weren't going to make it to the bed. Her bra landed next, the handy little shelf next to them took her weapons and seconds later she was bare while he remained fully clothed. He pushed her down to the floor, one hand locked in her hair he pulled gently till her head arched back.

Ziva cried out when her bare skin dragged cross the carpet. It was a delicious kind of torture. She felt his mouth on her neck, trailing down to her collar bone. Gibbs was coming undone and she loved it; every untamed part of him called to her making her hotter and wetter than she would have imagined. His fingers pushed inside her stroking till she was arching against him. Just below her shoulder his mouth found a sweet spot, nipping hard marking her as he had their first night together. Combined with the thrusting of his fingers it was too much for her and she flew apart underneath him.

Gibbs loved how warm and wet she was every time he touched her. The feel of her was drugging him dragging him from sanity. He couldn't stop himself from marking her as he had before; something he couldn't explain drove him to it. He didn't expect it to be what threw her over the edge but it did just that, he nearly came right then. Reluctantly he drew his fingers from her, heard her call out in protest. Quickly he shed his clothes, feeling his breath rasping out heavily he grabbed the ottoman from the chair and dragged it over. Lifting Ziva he laid her on her stomach across it, dammed if she wasn't pretty as hell laid out before him.

Ziva knew his intention and she almost came again just from the thought of it. She could feel he was desperately trying to be gentle but the control she'd felt snap earlier hadn't returned and tomorrow there would be marks. She'd wear those marks proudly, his need for her was overpowering his good sense and it was a turn on like no other.

Gibbs kneeled behind her reigning kisses and gentle love-bites down her back. His hand found her hair and pulled just enough that she tightened around him as he slid inside her in one stroke. It was his turn to call out unable to hold back the low groan in his throat. One hand snaked around till he could run his thumb over her nipple, grazing across the tip again and again. Every touch of his thumb had her clenching and unclenching around him.

"Jethro…" Ziva knew she was close only seconds till she came again and still it was too long. He was trying to hold back trying to gentle his thrusts. She shifted her hips and heard him moan again. "I won't break."

Gibbs heard her desperate plea, the honest need and gave up his fight with his body. He thrust hard and fast shaking them both with the force. He came only seconds after she clamped down so hard around him he thought might die from the pleasure of it. The delicious friction tore up his spine and flew through his veins momentarily blinding him to anything but a wash of bright color.

Somehow Gibbs managed to get them both to the couch as exhausted as they were. Ziva curled in his lap dragging the throw around them. "I should apologize Zi, I promised I'd never get rough with you." He heard her laugh still husky from their lovemaking and shuddered beneath her.

"That was not rough Jethro and you know it, despite my encouragement you still held back. One of these days I will convince you to really let go of that control of yours. No that was beautiful." He must have liked what she said since he took her mouth with his, oh so gently loving her mouth.

Gibbs shuddered at the thought of really letting go with her and knew it would only be so long before she got just what she was asking for. "I'm a damn lucky man Zi."

Ziva kissed him, standing up and wrapping the throw around her. "Only as lucky as I am Jethro. Wait for me I will be back and we will see what kind of trouble we can get into." She left him sitting there naked and bound up the stairs.

Gibbs shook his head with a grin wondering once again if he'd survive loving Ziva. He grabbed his pants and tossed them on managing a few of the buttons. Before he could begin to pick up their scattered clothing he heard heavy footsteps on his porch and the door handle turn. He grabbed Ziva's gun and aimed it at the door just as Mike Franks stepped into his living room.

Mike knew two things when he walked in Gibbs house, he was damn glad he hadn't arrived five minutes earlier and he'd better start knocking. Dropping his bag he held up his hands in mock surrender. "Whoa probie it's just me." He kicked the door shut behind him and brought his hands down when Gibbs lowered his weapon.

"Hell, Mike I damn near shot you." Gibbs put the safety on Ziva's gun and set it back on the shelf.

"Didn't know you'd have a woman here probie, I'm guessing you forgot you invited me a couple months back to stay a while. " His mouth quirked when Gibbs let out a frustrated sigh.

Gibbs didn't get to answer Mike's correct assumption before Ziva came hurriedly down the stairs. He wasn't going to have time to warn her. He hoped like hell she wearing more than that damn throw.

"Jethro, You're going to have to feed me if you expect too…." Ziva's voice caught in her throat as she reached the bottom of the stairs. She wasn't sure who was more shocked her or Mike Franks.

Mike recognized Ziva's voice even before she hit the bottom of the stairs. If her words hadn't given them away, the fact she was wearing Gibbs' bathrobe would have. She certainly wasn't there in any official capacity.

Ziva looked from Mike's knowing grin to Gibbs' stern face and almost laughed. "Jethro stop glaring at him. It is hardly his fault you cannot remember to lock the door."

"As I recall you were the last one in." he saw her roll her eyes.

"You distracted me." Forgetting for a moment they were being watched she tugged gently on the key. "How was I supposed to remember about doors." She turned back to Mike who was smirking and smiled. "It's good to see you again Mike."

"You too Ziva." He made a move to grab his bag and head back out but Gibbs shook his head.

"Ziva why don't you get dressed, I'll get dinner started." He gathered up her clothes and handed them to her. She gave him an impish grin, kissed him square on the mouth before heading upstairs once again.

Gibbs grabbed up his shirt and tossed it on, waiting for Mike to say something. "Spit it out Mike" he let him follow him into the kitchen.

Mike leaned against the kitchen counter as Gibbs washed up and dug around in the fridge. "How'd you get so damn lucky probie?"

Gibbs shook his head and shrugged. "No damn clue Mike."

"She living here?" Mike saw a flash of something painful cross Gibbs' face and wished he hadn't asked.

"Would be if it were an option." Gibbs chopped the vegetables for stir fry with more vehemence than he'd meant to.

"So not just an affair then." Mike made it a statement rather than a question. Gibbs nodded but left it at that. "Sorry I interrupted, I can get a room in town."

"You will not Mike." Ziva stepped in the kitchen stole carrot from where Gibbs was chopping, ignoring his warning glance she spoke to Mike. "Jethro tell him he does not have to leave."

Gibbs looked at her "You wouldn't mind?"

Ziva filched another snow pea this time glancing at him briefly. "It is your house Jethro." The instant the knife drove into the word cutting board she knew what she'd done. She flicked a glance to Mike, then back to Gibbs.

"Dammit Ziva don't piss me off, you know why I'm asking." Gibbs ignored Mike, ignored the food sizzling in the pan focused only on making his point to Ziva.

"I do not mind." She stole another carrot, and went to stir the food in the pan.

Gibbs took a deep breath and went back to cutting vegetables.

Mike raised an eyebrow "You're a brave man probie, she could gut you like a fish."

Ziva laughed, "Nah he's far too useful."

Not enough hours later Gibbs was saying goodbye to Ziva. It was as necessary as ever to keep from getting caught, at least by anyone else. He watched her drive away careful to keep an eye out for anyone that was watching then shut and locked the door.

"You must be half loco probie, she's way outta your league. Can't say I blame you though." Mike lounged on the couch while Gibbs took the chair.

"Yeah some days it feels that way."

Mike heard Gibbs' sigh, felt he was holding something back otherwise he wouldn't have greeted him with a gun. "So what aren't you telling me?"


	15. Just Another Day, or Not

_Just an Author's note. So far you haven't seen much of McGee I apologize to any McGee lovers. It's not that I don't like his character but more I can't get the feel for him. I just can't seem to write him in a way that seems real to me. So I gave him a girlfriend that keeps him busy ;) I'm hoping to work him more into the story as it progresses._

_Also I should say that this chapter…well you have to blame the story for taking me its own wa,y the dialogue went on a tangent. _

Ziva watched Mike Franks walk into NCIS and hated for just a moment she doubted his promise to keep their secret. It was a foolish fear if anyone could keep a secret it was Mike Franks. She watched the guys greeting him while she looked at the financials of a dead marine they were looking into.

Tony saw Mike Franks walk in and wonder if this was how Gibbs was going to solve his Hollis Mann problem. Shaking his head against that though he reached out a hand to Mike. "Good to see you Mike,"

"Same to you Dinozzo, McGee." He turned to Ziva and winked at her "Bella, damn don't you look good. Care to share a hug with an old man."

Ziva didn't bother to hide her grin, accepting the hug she almost laughed out loud when he whispered in her ear. "Go easy on him he looks a bit worn out this morning." He did laugh long and hard making Tony and McGee look at her and Gibbs wonder. No one else could have heard what he said but she still fought a blush. Ziva managed a quick glance and saw Gibbs looked anything but worn out, energized seemed more the case.

"I hear you have a mystery man, he better treat you right or I'll have to take him out behind the barn." Mike heard the guys laugh and finally got the blush from Ziva he'd been working so hard for.

"Trust me he treats me very well." Ziva sat back down determined to figure out what she was missing in the reports.

Tony caught Mike's attention and grinned "Yeah he treats her real nice, sends her gifts all the time, he made her late one morning. She didn't seem to mind."

Mike choked on his laughter as Ziva glared at the four of them. "Reaallllly," he drew the word and Gibbs' torture out. "Seems like he's a romantic, go figure."

Gibbs wanted to strangle Mike; his good natured fun was testing Gibbs' patience. "Enough Mike they've got work to do." He looked at his team "Heading out for lunch, got my cell."

Tony watched Ziva gather up her phone, wondering if he'd crossed the line. "Ziva, I was just teasing you, I didn't piss you off did I?"

Ziva glanced where McGee looked like he was waiting for that answer as well. "No Tony you did not piss me off. I do not mind the teasing." She swallowed wishing she could explain more. "I am having lunch with Abby would you like to join us?"

Tony looked to McGee who pointed to the phone he was on indicating he was going to lunch with his girlfriend. "Sure what are we having?"

Ziva waived to McGee as they stepped on the elevator. "I'm dying for pizza."

"Sounds good." Tony cleared his throat looked at Ziva than away again. "I'm happy for you Ziva. You seem really happy lately."

Ziva knew there was more to his statement but nodded "I am Tony, I do not think I have ever been this happy."

"Why won't you even tell us his name?" The elevator doors slid open and he watched her pause between the doors.

Ziva had been expecting this question but it still hurt just a little. Abby standing nearby with the same question in her eyes only added to that hurt. "If I told you his name you would want to look into him. You might say you would not but the investigator in you could not resist. He has his secrets as we all do and I respect him too much to break his trust." She glanced at Abby , then Tony "What we have is far from simple but worth it."

Tony nodded and gave her a wry grin. "Sorry, just don't want you all broken hearted going ninja chick on us."

Ziva raised an eyebrow, heard Abby's laughter and joined in.

Gibbs sat across from Mike watching him flirt with the waitress. For her part she seemed to be enjoying the attention at least if the number of times she checked on them was an indication. Last night he'd filled Mike in on the details of what he and Ziva were into, the impersonal details only. He knew he could trust Mike there was no issue with that and having someone to watch their backs, from the outside, couldn't hurt either. When the waitress walked away Mike turned his attention back to him. "So gifts…"

Gibbs glared, "Oh shut up."

Mike laughed, "Hell no. Didn't know you had a romantic side probie."

Gibbs fought the grin for a minute then gave up. "Don't want to make the same mistakes with her I did with the others."

Mike sobered, "You mean your wives, after Shannon. So she's wife material..never thought I'd hear you say that."

Gibbs couldn't speak for a long moment, picking at his food instead. "She's more than a wife Mike."

Mike didn't respond with his usual humor, the words were said so quietly he barely heard them. He didn't understand what Gibbs meant but the emotion behind them was something Gibbs never shared.

"Can't explain what that means, that's up to her. If she wants to share so be it." Gibbs saw Mike watching him full of questions, but just shrugged.

"Well don't be telling tales out of school, let's not piss off the lady assassin. I'd bet a bundle she's damn pretty mad, but I sure as hell don't want it directed at me." Mike saw Gibbs nod in agreement and thought once again what a lucky bastard Gibbs was. As the waitress approached again with another beer he hadn't ordered he wondered if he might not just get lucky too.

Ziva was considering another piece of pizza despite the three she'd already had when the elevator doors whisked opened. The mail guy dropped some mail on Abby's desk then spotting her looked back in his cart and handed her a small white box. As quick as he was there he was gone.

She felt Abby and Tony watching her but it was Abby that spoke first. "He's spoiling you Ziva."

Tony snorted and grabbed more pizza. "So it can't be a plant of any kind, and you already got an alarm clock hmmmm. Any guesses." He winced at the not so gentle punch in the arm Ziva gave him, using it to hide his curiosity over what was in the box.

Ziva slit the tape on the box and lifted the lid. Despite who she was, where she was, she felt the sting of tears in her eyes at what lay inside. A key, not like what Jethro wore but a delicate skeleton key in antique brass. It was tiny no more than half an inch long. But she knew what it meant. She already had his house key but this, this was about the comment he'd made. She couldn't live with him but he was telling her in his own way that had it been possible that's what he wanted. She swiped at a tear feeling far too vulnerable.

Tony saw a tear escape her and if they hadn't been happy tears he would have punched something. Ziva's vulnerability wasn't something that left him unaffected. He saw Abby glance at him and knew he should make a graceful exit. "Whoa this is getting into girl territory I'm outta here and I'm taking the pizza." Grabbing the box he beat a hasty exit.

Abby watched while Ziva tried to compose herself, handing her a tissue when it looked like she might not succeed. "You okay?"

Ziva nodded. "I am really. It is just hard sometimes. There are things that make it difficult for us to be together and this was his way of telling me he wishes it was not so."

Abby risked a one armed hug and was surprised when Ziva almost seemed to need it. "It's good he cares so much Ziva. Can I ask, why does he always send the gifts here? Why not in private?"

Ziva sniffled and met Abby's curious gaze. At first she had wondered the same thing, especially since they didn't talk about the gifts at all. "It is his way of staking his claim. I can tell you that because I know you understand what I am saying but please do not tell anyone else that."

Abby sat back down across from Ziva. She quietly drank her calf-pow waiting for the rest.

Ziva traced the key, feeling the gift that it was burn through her fingertips. "Belonging to him is such a beautiful thing Abby. He does not ask very much but when he does, it is like I was waiting for him."

"Sounds like something really special Ziva."

"I would tell you more about him Abby if I could I swear it. But sharing who he is would cause problems I am not willing to face right now." She worked to pull herself together giving Abby a true smile.

Abby looked at Ziva impishly knowing she was trying to gather herself enough to go back to work but unable to stop, "SO the next question is of course just how good is he in bed?"

Gibbs stepped back to his desk and saw Tony was back from lunch early just as he was. Tony looked agitated. "What's up?"

Tony sat roughly in his chair. Looking to Gibbs he saw him look first to McGee's desk, and then Ziva's and back to him. "McGee's with his girlfriend, and last I knew Ziva was having a girl-cry with Abby. Never figured her for a crier."

Gibbs had to breathe deep not to visibly react to what Tony said. "Crying? Doesn't sound like Ziva."

Tony stared at his paperweight. "She got another gift, they were happy tears. But dammit who the hell is this guy that he can't even show his face she can't say his name?"

Gibbs silently cursed feeling Tony's frustration as his own, he responded instinctively "Jealous Tony?"

Tony's head snapped up "Dammit Gibbs that's not fair. Just leave it. She's my friend, I swear though if he breaks her heart I'll kick his ass."

"I'll help." Gibbs sat in his chair trying to ignore the unsaid in Tony's words. Gibbs had always known that Tony was attracted to Ziva, her assurances that nothing had happened between them told him much about Tony's restraint.

Tony nodded and left the conversation at that. Ziva stepped off the elevator looked between the two of them but said nothing. He figured she was probably embarrassed that he'd seen her cry so he focused on work and didn't bring up lunch. But he didn't fail to notice the key on the chain around her neck nestled next to the Star of David she wore.

Ziva heard Gibbs slip into her kitchen from her garage. She hadn't expected him; Mike was in town she had assumed they would visit. In fact she hadn't expected to see him other than work until Friday when they had dinner scheduled with a friend of his. Saturday was reserved for the first trip to Haven. Seemed with Gibbs around she was no longer in danger of being bored.

Gibbs found her sitting on the edge of her bed, she was wearing a dress a simple piece of cotton cloth it pleased him that she wore it even when he wasn't around. "Take it off." He watched her reaction waiting for the fear, the confusion instead he saw her lick her lips desire sliding through her eyes. Without question she unbuttoned the dress and let it drop to the floor. He caught sight of lace and satin as it too hit the floor. Finally she was nude before him, raising her arms to undo her hair.

Ziva didn't know what had brought Gibbs here, what let him give her the man she was so in love with. Whatever it was she trembled with the pleasure of it. When her hair was loose he took her hands and placed them on his chest.

"Undress me."

The words were like steel drifting across her skin making her wet from just that simple command. She reached first for the buckle on his belt, removing it slowly and setting his gun on her nightstand. With steady hands she unbuttoned his shirt, pushing it off his shoulders placing gentle kisses as she went. He had already removed his shoes and socks which made pushing the rest of his clothing off easy. Slowly she pushed the fabric down till she was kneeling before him. She looked up at him watching his cock twitch in response to her gaze, slowly she let her mouth wrap around him.

Gibbs' hands found her hair anchoring to her like a lifeline. She was heaven, burning heaven as she slid her tongue up and down his shaft. He thrust into her mouth as gentle as his need would allow but not as gently as she deserved. The satin of her mouth was damn near his undoing, and it was all he could do not to indulge the need to finish in her mouth. Somehow he found the will to savor a few more swipes of that magic tongue, then he pulled her away. Her eyes found his heavy with pleasure and need. "No more."

Ziva stood and without having to be told waited for his next request. He watched her quietly simply observed her standing before him. Her body was tight with need, hot, wet and those flame blue eyes took it all in. Her hands ached to touch him, her body screamed for release a touch something, yet she remained waiting.

Gibbs watched her heard her body calling for his touch yet she remained still, letting only her eyes reach out for him. "You listen so well Ziva."

Ziva couldn't hide the sound she made in her throat at the pleasure that washed over her from his praise. "It pleases you so it pleases me."

Gibbs stepped just a bit closer almost feeling her skin on his. The heat poured from her, arousal scenting the air, willing him to touch her. "I see that. I see how much your body wants mine yet you're waiting." Slowly he reached a hand between them and cupped her breast gently, thumbing the tip. Her head fell back and he replaced his thumb with his mouth. He felt her hands in his hair, pulling him closer and he almost gave in. He pulled back chuckling at her sound of protest.

"You know what I kept thinking about today?" He laid her back on the bed. "I kept remembering that first night here in your room. I kept thinking about what you'd been doing before I came to you that night." He watched her flush, her mouth part on the memory. Lightly he ran his finger across the fullness of her lower lip.

"I do not know what to say to that, Jethro." Ziva closed her eyes briefly, feeling just the slightest bit of embarrassment.

"Ah sweet Ziva, I'm not used to seeing you shy." He held himself above her bending his head to graze his teeth lightly over her other nipple. Her hiss of pleasure wrapped around him. "It was all I could do to walk away from you, sitting on the bed watching me leave you looked so damn fuckable. I had to take a very long cold shower that night." He traced circles on her stomach feeling her muscles tense as he spoke.

Ziva lifted her hips into his touch. She could easily picture him standing in his shower water cascading over him. "Just a cold shower Jethro?"

He grinned as he pressed a kiss against her stomach. Before commenting he lingered there letting his tongue trace her belly button. "How well you know me."

Ziva felt him kissing her stomach almost reverently, something she didn't recognize washed over her. Then his head moved inches lower and coherent thought began to leave her.

Gibbs let his tongue swirl lazily "I stood in that shower, hand around my cock thinking of being inside you till I came in my hand. I know now what a damn poor substitute that is." The moment the words were out of his mouth he let his tongue plunge deep inside her. She flooded his mouth, sweat nectar crossing his tongue as she tightened her hands in his hair.

Ziva would never understand how Gibbs managed such a mastery over her body. His words and talented tongue dragged her into an orgasm so fast she thought she might quit breathing. The heat of it nearly consumed her, a sweat broke out over her and she knew she was shaking. Only when he began pressing soft kisses on her hip working his way back up her body could she truly find her breath. When his mouth found hers it was harsh, demanding. She could taste herself there. Knew that was his intention, felt him shudder when she moaned in pleasure at the intimacy of it. She felt him poised to enter her, waiting for a moment only he was aware of.

"When I came here tonight Zi, I intended to tell you to use that toy locked away in your nightstand. I wanted to watch you make yourself come like you did that night. I should have known I wouldn't be able to resist being inside you." He watched her eyes fly open, liquid midnight met his as he sank deep inside her. Exactly as he'd hoped for he saw the pleasure slam through her before she couldn't keep her eyes open any longer. Lifting her legs over his arms he thrust deeper than he thought possible. She gripped the sheets tightly in her hands but only when he felt her coming apart again did he finally let the fire consume him, collapsing over her as he came.

Moments later Gibbs watched her fingering the key on the chain around her neck. It seemed fitting somehow that they both had a key to each other. He might have called it poetic if wasn't laughing at himself for being so sentimental. "I didn't mean to make you cry Ziva."

Ziva paused looked over at him and didn't' bother to hide the blush. Taking her hand with his she traced the callouses she loved so much. "You made me happy Jethro, I was not sad. Tony told you?"

"It unsettled him Ziva." Gibbs felt her hand stall and with that simple hesitation came knowledge "He cares for you Zi."

Ziva felt her heart race. Next to her Gibbs was very still and his tone was cautious far too cautious for her comfort. "Jethro.." she turned into him placing her hand on his chest, expecting to feel his heart racing like hers. She was almost afraid when it remained the calm steady beat she was familiar with.

"He said if the man you were with broke your heart he'd beat the hell out of him, said I'd help him." He brought her hand to his mouth kissing softly over her knuckles. He felt the slight trembling in her hand. "I asked him if he was jealous, he didn't seem to like that."

Ziva heard Gibbs unspoken question, waited for his anger but couldn't find it anywhere between them. "Neshama…"

"Ziva nothing you tell me could ever make me love you less." He watched her eyes widen.

"We never slept together Jethro. He never touched me like you have." Ziva thought back to a night long ago wishing she hadn't tried to push it out of her mind. "We did kiss. I did not lie to you though, it was just a moment the briefest of moments and we were interrupted."

Gibbs understood then why Tony had reacted the way he had, understood more than Ziva ever would. Tony was not the kind of man to have a taste of Ziva and be able to walk away easily. He would have wanted more. He might have let Ziva end the moment, but it would still be burned in his memory. Ziva just had that effect. He felt something wet touch his fingers, looked down and saw her tears. "Dammit Ziva I made you cry again, I'm such an ass."

Ziva blinked hardly expecting Gibbs to be chastising himself. "Jethro..I"

"Ziva I am not angry at you. I told you before whatever happened before us was your business. I wanted to understand why Tony felt the way he did that's all." He saw the surprise in her eyes the naked shock over his acceptance. "You are so easy to love Ziva, scares the hell out of me."

Ziva held tightly to Gibbs' hand wondering how he could be so understanding. "You are the one who interrupted us Jethro. You called to ask me something and after that I could not. But I think you are wrong about Tony. It was a long time ago, he never mentioned it again. He never even came over again unless one of you were with him."

Gibbs smiled to himself, "You aren't an easy woman to ignore Ziva. Wanting you is enough to drive a man to his knees. Promise me Zi, don't be upset about this. It was my curiosity that made me ask. Don't treat Tony any differently over this. Don't let it ruin the friendship, the team"

Ziva heard him add the last part as an afterthought. Saw the sincerity in his eyes, there was no hesitation, no doubt behind his request. She pressed her mouth to his thankful when he kissed her with the same fervor he always had. "I promise, as long as you promise to believe it is you I want and no other, you that I love."

Gibbs found his body ready for hers again and as he slid inside her gave her the reassurance she needed "never doubted it."

_Oh and don't worry our couple is rock solid, nothing too shaky on the horizon I swear…..I think ;)_


	16. Through the Mundane Looking Glass

Gibbs watched Ziva getting ready to leave. It was Saturday and today they were going to Haven for the first time. Mike had stayed until just the morning before heading home with a warning wink to Gibbs not to wear himself out. He hadn't seen Ziva outside of work since he'd left her bed Monday night and watching her drying her hair in nothing but a bathrobe was proving difficult. All week he'd looked forward to taking her to dinner at Sawyer's house Friday night. The call from Sawyer apologetically cancelling had frustrated him. He couldn't blame Sawyer no one felt like entertaining while they had the flu but he'd wanted to show Ziva off. He had called her last night hoping for a visit but carefully she'd informed him Abby had dropped in unexpectedly.

Friday night had ended up with him at the gym punching out his frustration on the heavy bag. Now he could smile at the memory, last night had been another thing altogether.

Ziva set the hair dryer down, grinning back at Jethro in the mirror. "What are you smiling at?"

"I missed you last night Zi, it was damn frustrating not seeing you most of this week." He stepped behind her, pushing off her robe.

Ziva turned in his arms, savoring the feel of his clothing against her naked body. "You have seen me every day Jethro."

"You know what I mean." She nodded and tried to hold back a yawn, that made him laugh. "Just what were you doing without me here last night ZI?"

Ziva blushed, "Not what you are imaging, unfortunately. I am just tired. I would blame you but we both know it is not your fault, again unfortunately. I stayed up late with Abby watching a movie. I felt fine when I woke up but I am now wishing I had time for a nap." she saw his blue eyes light up and laughed. "One where I actually sleep Jethro."

"Spoilsport." Gibbs watched her dressing and wished he'd made it over earlier in the day. The scraps of lace she donned barely passed for underwear as spilling out of them as she was. She tempted him more every time he saw her. "I have something for you."

Ziva raised an eyebrow, making it clear just what she thought he was referring to. When he laughed she couldn't help joining in. He dug into the bag he'd brought with him and brought out a piece of folded cloth. He passed it to her and she was surprised by the light weight of it.

"I thought this might make you feel better about going to Haven today." Gibbs watched her open the cloth, heard her indrawn breath, the wealth of emotion in that sound was telling.

"Oh, Jethro they're beautiful." He'd made her knives. More correctly he'd made her two beautifully carved and wickedly sharp all wood knives. Holding them in her hands she saw the intricate carvings in the handle, they looked familiar.

Gibbs took her hand touched the bracelet she wore, tracing the carvings there as he had hundreds of time since he'd first put it on her. "They are not as sturdy as steel, but I chose strong wood and they have a good edge."

Ziva had to swallow back her tears not wanting him to mistake them for something else. He'd worked the pattern of her bracelet into the knives he'd made her. Not only was the wood strong, sharp and concealable but beautiful. She spun them in her hand, the balance felt nearly perfect. She would never be able to practice throwing them but should the need arise they were as lethal as any steel blade.

"I know how you feel about going in there unarmed, I wanted to do something about that." He could see from her reaction what his gift meant to her, how it affected her.

"You will be unarmed as well Jethro, that makes me just as nervous, it was not just about me." Ziva continued to stare at the knives. One was smaller than the other, the wood dark and rich. Every surface was smooth perfectly formed and suited to her hand. The skill in its creation took her breath away.

"I have no doubt you can watch my back Ziva." He saw her eyes meet his, the love there nearly his undoing.

Ziva felt the power of what he said to her. She forced a deep breath in. "This must have taken you a long time."

"A little while. The wood is called Grenadilla or African Blackwood. I had to order it from Africa. It's rumored to be the strongest wood in the world. Didn't want it snapping in half on you." Gibbs didn't tell her the precautions required to work with the wood that the dust was toxic requiring he wear a mask in order to do so. Seeing it in her hand, watching the relief that had crossed her face when she'd understood what it was for had been reward enough for the extra effort.

Ziva saw him hand her something else, a scabbard for each knife, butter soft leather in the same ebony shade as the wood. One had the band necessary to anchor it to her thigh. "Will you help me put it on?"

She hadn't needed to ask, Gibbs had already moved his hands to take the leather. He knelt before her wrapping the soft material around her leg. The contrast of the dark material against the paleness of her skin nearly drove him mad. He slid the knife into the scabbard, then kissed his way back up her body. When his mouth met hers the intensity of her kiss rocked him.

Ziva felt him break the kiss with reluctance she felt as well. He moved away settling in a chair, watching her with passion filled blue eyes. "You plan to just watch me get dressed then?"

Gibbs smiled "That's exactly what I plan to do." He saw her flush and smiled again. She adjusted the scabbard on her thigh ensuring a snug stable fit. As always he felt a surge of need, forcing himself to remain in the chair he saw it was her turn to grin at him. "The knives will only work as a good substitute if they just use metal detectors. If they use body scanners or do pat downs then we have a problem."

Ziva saw something wild and angry flash through Gibbs' eyes and paused in her steps to the closet. "Jethro?"

Gibbs took a deep breath before he could answer the question asked simply by her saying his name. "I'm not sure I will react well if some stranger decides to put his hands all over you." He tasted the anger in his own words and was shocked by the intensity of it.

Ziva laid the dress she had chosen on the bed and moved to kneel in front of him. "I belong to you Jethro. Should someone else have to touch me it will be only for a moment." She linked her fingers with his choosing her next words carefully. "I know we talked about how we are going to handle tonight. That we are going to simple behave as any other newcomers would. We will wait to do any snooping until later visits. But, we did not discuss us."

Gibbs didn't need Ziva to clarify what she was referring to. He wrapped his hand around her bracelet feeling the coolness of the gold beneath his gentle grip. He wanted to make his claim known to publicly have her known as his as more than just a lover. Yet they had agreed that this was private. "Ziva you work for me, if we bring this out the lines could blur. I don't want to screw this up." He was right yet the idea still teased him.

Ziva knew he was holding something back, loved him all the more for it. "Jethro, work is work. We have done a good job so far of keeping the two separate. Being your subordinate at work would never be confused with what we have in private. Not in my mind. You have never treated me with anything but respect, should I need to be reprimanded at work in some official capacity I would not hold that against you at home." She saw him frown and almost laughed at the boyish look it gave him. "Who we are together in private is our choice something special and while I enjoy that it is just for us we should think about this. We don't know why the couples went missing from Haven. Perhaps it is because they all saw something they shouldn't have, perhaps the women or men are of a certain type, or perhaps it is because they stood out in some way that angered someone. We will stand out a bit because of our jobs, but I would guess that whoever is doing these things might choose to avoid us because of that same reason."

Gibbs knew she was right, knew that they would have difficulty getting the kind of attention they were looking for. It was ironic that their secret relationship which was formed to attract attention just might have difficulty doing so. "We need to be different, noticeable."

Ziva nodded. She moved to sit in his lap, trying to ignore the blatant need she felt there. "There are other ways we could be noticed, games we could play so that we could draw attention sooner rather than later. I had a few other ideas before we spoke with Andrew but I have reevaluated some of those."

Gibbs felt her tense against him. It was the briefest of movements and then it was gone but it made him think harder about what Andrew had said. Carefully he thought back on that meeting, when he hit on what Ziva had considered he felt the first hint of anger at her he'd known since they'd been together. "You considered letting people believe I would…._hit_ you?" he felt sick just saying the words, a great wave of nausea he had to work hard to swallow past.

Ziva "I am sorry. I know without any doubt that you are not that kind of man. I have been trained since I was just a girl that completing the mission means doing whatever it takes." He was still angry she could feel it when he stood up setting her on her feet as he did so. "It was a brief thought Jethro and not one I enjoyed thinking about."

Gibbs cursed, loudly and in every language he knew. For a long moment he couldn't look at her just ran his hand on the back of his trying to cool his temper. "How did you figure you would provide the evidence Ziva? Cuz you have to know there is no way in hell I'd lay a hand on you."

He was really ticked, under other circumstances she might have laughed at the irony of why he was mad. Instead it made her realize she'd hurt him. "I know that." Moving closer again she reached up and touched his jaw. "I know who you are Jethro, what you are capable of I have never felt anything but safe with you. There has not been a man in my life I have trusted more, not one. Let us forget that I even thought about it."

Gibbs pulled her close simply holding her and breathing her in. He wanted to stay angry but Ziva was damn good at her job and thinking all possibilities came with that job. He didn't have to like where her mind had gone but he shouldn't hold it against her. "I love you Zi. No matter what happens with Haven that won't change."

Ziva felt him tighten his hold around her knew he needed it as much as she did. "I love you too. We will make this work. At times it may not be easy but we will find our way."

Gibbs closed his eyes praying she was right. "As for us and how we handle our relationship at Haven…."

Ziva placed a kiss on his neck, savoring the scent that was so uniquely him. "I will follow your lead Jethro. As I said I trust you maybe we need to wait and see just how much attention we attract and go from there."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

Gibbs stood next to Ziva sharing a look with her that told anyone who knew them they were surprised by the rather anticlimactic entrance to the Haven estate they chose. As expected it had a large gate which had scanners and what appeared to be electronic sniffers. The thirty acre estate was a sprawling combination of modern amenities and landscaping that could take you back in time. The parking carefully hidden underground held a myriad of vehicles. Gibbs could see everything from a Maserati to a civic that had seen better days. He saw Ziva notice it and she smiled. Her smile never failed to make him do the same it surprised him here though where everything in his nature reminded him to watch his back. He'd be watching Ziva's as well, even though it was something he did everyday something about being in this place amplified his need to be even more vigilant. The missing couples, nameless and faceless hovered in his mind. He felt her stop next to him looking at him questioningly. "Just be careful Zi."

Ziva squeezed his hand in answer. Finally they stepped through the wide double doors of the mansion that served as the main structure of the estate. They had already shown their ID's at the gate and again upon entering the parking structure. As they walked in there were no discernible metal detectors, no easily visible security force. People filtered here and there in the entry way moving in and out of various rooms. How many rooms there were in total Ziva couldn't begin to guess. The structure was massive, with multiple entries and exits. Music played from somewhere farther back in the building. At her right was the entrance to what appeared to be a den where various people chatted quietly. She eyed a very large staircase with veiled interest. She felt Gibbs moving closer to her, felt the shift in his breathing. His hand found the small of her back holding her gently in place. "Jethro?"

"It's nothing Ziva just wanted you closer."

"This is strange is it not? I do not know what I expected but it was not this. I have to admit I do not know what to do with myself." Ziva saw the half smile that never failed to make her melt, unable to resist she leaned in and gave him a gentle kiss. As she pulled away she whispered to him. "I love you."

Gibbs savored those words and then taking her hand led her to where the music seemed to be coming from. "Let's find something to do other than case the joint."

Ziva grinned and hiked an eyebrow as Jethro led her past the dizzying staircase. He grinned back and suddenly they were exploring the building with abandon. "Look Jethro." Ziva tugged at his hand as they came upon a glass encased drawing that detailed the various parts of the estate. "I imagine they would not want paper versions of this floating around but it would make things easier."

Gibbs mentally memorized the map as much as he could. Plotting out the outlying structures and working his way in. He almost laughed when he let it register in his mind the different activities that were available. "They have a bowling alley, an arcade, spa, cigar room….." he stopped feeling foolish that he was reading out loud what Ziva could see with her own eyes.

"It looks like the music we hear must be coming from the small nightclub. The gym and the indoor swimming pool do not surprise me but this does."

Gibbs grinned when she pointed out the indoor basketball court and outdoor tennis courts. "Looks like fun don't play tennis but been known to shoot hoops now and then. So what you wanna do." It seemed odd that at least at first they would just relax and get the feel of Haven rather than actively trying to find information on the missing. They had agreed they couldn't start asking questions or methodically exploring each room right away. The approach would have to be far more casual, handled with subtlety. Otherwise they would easily tip their hand. Next to him Ziva bit her lip and he had to mentally shake away exactly what he wanted to be doing with her.

"I would like to go to the Arcade. I have been in one before but have never been able to play the games." It did not hurt that the arcade was one of the outlying buildings giving them the chance to take in more of the estate.

Gibbs took her hand trying to ignore the instinct to drop it as another group of people walked by. She noticed and smiled at him. "I blame Tony."

Ziva stopped worried for a moment that he was referring to their last conversation regarding Tony. When all she saw was good humor in his eyes she let him continue to lead them through the building toward the arcade. "For what?"

Gibbs saw the hesitation in Ziva's eyes, knew what she had been thinking. He let it go not wanting to break the mood any further. "The video games."

She punched him playfully in the arm, "I want to play air hockey and something I heard about called skee-ball."

Gibbs laughed at her enthusiasm and the way she almost burst through the door. She was so damn beautiful in her pale pink sundress, hair pulled up in a long braid. He knew she looked far too young for him and he didn't even care. He looked around and realized it was an actual arcade not just an attempt at one. They had every game imaginable, along with some he didn't recognize. There was popcorn and cotton candy, off to the side there was even a selection of prizes that could be won by earning tickets form the games. "You're in luck I'm very good at both of those games. Maybe if you're really lucky I'll win you a prize."

Ziva figured she already had a prize, he was grinning at her. But, she kept that to herself knowing that saying it out loud would only embarrass him. "I want the giant teddy bear. So you better work hard."

Gibbs couldn't help himself he whispered in her ear. "Hard is never a problem around you Zi." She blushed as he'd known she would. It caught the attention of a man just across the way he gave Ziva a long savoring look before turning his attention to Gibbs giving him a respectful nod before turning his attention back to the woman he was with. There was something familiar about him but Gibbs couldn't quite place his face.

"Jethro there is no need for the staring contest. I am here with you." Ziva wondered if he knew he growled slightly when he was being possessive.

"Sorry Zi, comes naturally around you I guess. He looks familiar though." He watched as Ziva took another subtle look.

"I do not recognize him." She kept the man's face in her mind planning to sketch it out later.

Ziva kept it casual as did Gibbs but as they moved through the Arcade they kept a watchful eye on the man and his partner.

Gibbs drove deciding that the visit to Haven had been far too easy. He didn't believe Haven could be what it appeared to be it. Everyone, everything had an agenda. The man they had seen stil stuck in his mind even though he couldn't figure out why. Sighing he pushed a hand through his hair. The visit had been fun if you took into account the fact they had had a nice meal, played in the Arcade until he'd won Ziva a bear nearly five feet tall and even managed a dance. But as far as getting answers it had been mundane.

Ziva took Gibbs free hand. "As much as you would like Gibbs this will not fall into our laps to be quickly solved. We knew that from the beginning."

Gibbs glanced over "I know it's just it isn't easy to wait, not knowing what we do."

"No it is not." Ziva glanced at the clock in the car. It was early still or at least not as late as they had intended to stay out. "I should tell you to take me home but I do not want to."

Gibbs kissed the back of her hand, "Good I have no intention of taking you anywhere but my bed."

Ziva felt pleasure surround her with that simple statement. She rested her head on his shoulder. "We will find them Jethro one way or another."

* * *

_So their first Haven visit might not be what you expected but I have my reasons. Things are just getting started. ;)_


	17. All things Hinky

_I apologize for the delay in posting this update. Homeschool is back in full swing for me so that has had me busy. Also, I really wanted this chapter to be just right, hopefully I didn't disappoint. :)_

* * *

It was a dead body like any of the other hundreds of dead bodies he'd seen in his career. More accurately it was two dead bodies a man and a woman although one couldn't call them typical considering they looked like the mummies Gibbs had seen photos of from ancient Egypt. The fact it was a couple, gave him pause worried him, glancing up at Ziva who was photographing the bodies he knew she was thinking the same as him. A pair a man and a woman wrapped beautifully in what appeared to be strips of white linen. They'd been discovered at the foot of the Washington monument. That by itself was odd but for now his focus was on managing the scene. Thankfully it was the nearly two am in the morning and somehow they'd gotten lucky. Ziva had finished photographing the scene and the press was only just showing up. Ducky was loading the bodies quickly, the press wouldn't get any pictures of the actual bodies or the state they were in this time.

He caught Ziva's gaze again and it was grim. The very real possibility that this couple was one of the missing couples from Haven was startling at the very least. "Spread out farther Ziva. Get pictures of the area from a wider view." He guessed there was a significance that they couldn't easily see but might be reveled through photos. He saw her nod then turned his attention to Tony. Tony was searching for evidence, from the look on his face he wasn't finding much.

McGee was sketching the scene, moving around slowly. Gibbs could see the wheels turning. It would be interesting to see what he would come up with.

"Hey Duck, any ideas?" Gibbs hovered close trying not to stand too close.

"Nothing yet Jethro. I won't know much until I remove the bandages and that will take time. Each layer of wrapping will require close inspection. Before I begin that there will be scans and what not." Ducky looked to Palmer who along with a few other agents was standing outside the closed doors of the van.

"Figured as much had to ask." Gibbs moved away to talk with the security guard that made regular rounds and had found the body. He looked to be a stand-up guy. He'd been making his regular rounds when he'd discovered the bodies. He'd been smart enough to grab photos of the bodies with his cell phone and send a text message to a friend in the Police Dept. Doing so was the only thing that had kept the Media from being alerted sooner. NCIS had been called when a series of Navy medals had been found arranged on the ground surrounding the male's body. When Gibbs approached he stood up straight and met his gaze.

"Sir."

Gibbs nodded "Don't call me Sir. Just tell me what you know."

"Yeah ok. So I do the same things every night. I patrol the area a few times throughout the night. I drive the cart to the general area, get out and walk around. Never had much exciting happen. A few people making out, some trying to do some tagging, mostly just harmless stuff. Security was stepped up directly after 911 but recently it's been lightened. Can't maintain threat readiness forever is what they tell me."

Gibbs eyed the man respectfully. "You military?"

"Was, Marine for eight years." He settled back against the golf cart he'd referred to earlier. "When I saw the medals, I decided that maybe keeping this quiet would be a good thing. Not to mention the way I found them. Got a friend who is a detective, sent him the info. I knew he'd call you guys, would have called you guys myself but didn't have a direct line, wanted to keep it low key, figured you'd appreciate the discretion."

Gibbs nodded. "Sure do, we rarely get a jump on the media. This hitting the news would make all sorts of problems." Gibbs let the guard know he'd need to come in for a formal interview, shook his hand and moved on.

Tony appeared to be finished with collecting evidence, Ziva was stowing her camera and McGee was putting the finishing touches on his last sketch. He glanced at Tony and caught him staring at the ground, following the path of the sidewalks that wrapped around and led to the monument. He glanced up at Gibbs and frowned. "This is going to get weird, I just have that feeling."

Gibbs nodded; he'd had the same feeling. Although, perhaps, not for the same reasons Tony had "Just what we need." He answered because it was expected. When he'd first seen the bodies of what was a clearly a couple he'd wondered at the timing. If these were the bodies of a couple associated with Haven then it couldn't be a coincidence. They had been to Haven only twice, their first visit to get the feel of the place, and the second trip for a quick brunch to see if going at a different time resulted in new information. Both trips had been uneventful they had seen no one they had easily recognized. There had also been no opportunity to do much exploring. There last trip had been only a few days earlier. His eyes found Ziva again trying to be casual; he could read in her eyes that she was as concerned as he was. How they would find out if this couple was linked to Haven was another matter altogether. They hadn't found any ID near the bodies and he could only guess at the state they were in beneath the wrappings.

He was grateful that he and Ziva had taken a car while the guys had driven the van. He wanted to talk with her before they got back to NCIS.

Pushing their way through the crowd of reporter's was never easy but considering the location of the find the media was out in full force now. It took considerable effort for him and Ziva to make it back to their car and then only with the help of the local leo's. Finally back in the car and headed back to NCIS Gibbs sighed in relief.

"There is a good chance Gibbs that, the couple found is one of the ones missing from Haven. I know you suspect that." Ziva bit her lip staring out at the road ahead of them. "The timing is what worries you most though correct?"

Gibbs nodded. "Yeah, we haven't been with Haven long, or caused enough trouble for there to be an obvious warning. So it's either a warning for warning's sake or it's a coincidence."

"You do not believe in coincidence." Ziva stated what everyone already knew.

"No, not as a rule but to be honest it does happen now and then. In this case I don't know what to think. It would mean the killer either heard about us or saw us." Gibbs shook his head.

"But it didn't look like a warning did it?" Ziva saw Gibbs give her a rueful grin and smiled back. "It felt..what is the word? Reverend?"

Gibbs chuckled lightly "Reverent, is the word you're looking for. I agree it looked very ceremonial. The jars, the medals, the wrappings and where they were placed. If it were a warning it should have been….."

"Scarier?" Ziva frowned again.

"Exactly, the whole things was just too pretty." He saw her smile and yawn. "You ok?"

Ziva almost gave him an annoyed look but knew that the line between personal and private was bound to blur. "I am fine just tired lately." She watched a look she couldn't place cross his face and almost asked about it but they were pulling into NCIS and the moment was lost.

GZGZGZGZGZGZGZGZGZGZ

Gibbs was feeling the frustration of coming up with a whole lot of nothing. Not getting any sleep wasn't helping. Normally sleep wasn't exactly a necessity for him at least not a lot of it. Lately, Ziva had kept him busy enough that he savored the sleep he did get. That thought might have made him smile if not for the complete lack of evidence they'd found. Or almost complete lack of evidence. They'd found a few gum wrappers, a piece of chewed gum, a few pieces of snack food all of which would most likely be attributed to the tourists that had visited earlier in the day. It had been hours since they'd found the bodies and yet all they had was conjecture at this point. Only one piece of evidence held their interest, had them all staring at the screen as Abby explained what it was.

"24K gold dust. And not the kind you can buy just anywhere. This isn't the kind you find in makeup or glitter, this stuff is high end. I ran it through mas- spec and it's very pure as you would expect with 24k." Abby stepped back and leaned against the desk, fighting a yawn where Ziva didn't succeed.

"Boss we found this near the bodies." Tony pulled up a photo Ziva had taken of the small circle on the concrete near the body. "It wasn't near the any of the canopic jars."

Gibbs stared at the impression trying to make sense of it swearing lightly when it didn't make sense to him. "I suppose in and of itself gold shouldn't surprise us; mummies, canopic jars, the Washington Monument all of it links to an Egyptian theme. The Egyptian's were known for their love of gold. It has to tie in somewhere."

He ignored the look the surprised look the others in the room gave him. He did love catching them off guard every now and then. He stared at the circle on the ground in silence for a long moment then felt a grin cross his face. "A knee." Gibbs pointed at the screen running his finger around the shape Tony had photographed and taken the gold dust sample from. "Whoever left the bodies, kneeled down here. I would bet the gold dust was on the body of whoever dropped off our victims."

Tony sighed, "This one is going to get weird. Someone wearing gold body dust, carrying two mummies and a bunch of canopic jars dropping bodies off at the Washington Monument and nobody sees a thing. Really going to get…" Tony trailed off.

"Hinky." Abby finished for him.

Gibbs heard his phone ring. Looking at the caller ID he saw it was Ducky and hoped for some answers. He answered and looked to the rest of the team letting them know they were needed in the morgue.

Stepping into Ducky's domain was always interesting, this time was no different. With the two bodies laid out on metal tables and the canopic jars lined up on tables beside them for a moment Gibbs could believe he'd stepped back in time. "What you got Duck?"

"Well Jethro not as much as you might like but some." Ducky gestured to the two bodies on the table. "These bodies were mummified exactly as they would have been in Egyptian times. Or, so it appears from the x-rays and scans I've taken. Whomever did this knows their Egyptian traditions at least when it comes to honoring the dead. In between the wrappings are what appear to be amulets. The position of them tells me that this was no amateur that did this. The only difference I can see between these bodies and those of the ancient time is the way the brain was dealt with. Ancient Egyptians believed the brain had little value, so they would use a hook to pull the brain out and dissolve it. These bodies have had the skull cut open and the brain removed intact; it was then placed in one of these canopic jars. Thus far it's the only break with tradition I can find."

Ziva eyed the bodies with speculation. "Does it not take at least seventy days for the process to be completed?"

"You are correct Ziva. The mummification process is time consuming complicated and requires a fair amount of space. That may help you narrow down who did this. As I said it's going to take quite a bit of time to remove the wrappings. They weren't sealed with any sort of glue which surprised me. So, I'll be unwrapping the bodies, each strip of linen will have to be processed for any trace. I don't expect to find any but it's always possible." Ducky looked at Gibbs saw the frustration and knew what his next question would be. "It's going to take hours Gibbs, and it's not something I can rush. I'll need to document each layer as I go."

Gibbs didn't bother to hide his frustration as he let out a sigh. Glancing at his watch he had to bite back another sigh when he realized it was later than he'd realized. They'd all been up since the wee hours of the morning and it was already nearing typical quitting time. To keep everyone any longer just to wait on Ducky would be foolish. "I get it, go home everyone we'll start again in the morning." He wanted answers now but it would seem odd even for him to push this any later. Only he and Ziva realized the potential ramifications. To everyone else it was just another interesting case, even if it was weird as Tony had said. "Including you Ducky, I want you fresh for this. No point in trying to work through the night." He knew Ducky was as tired as the rest of them but would work anyways because Gibbs gave everyone a sense of urgency.

Ducky almost argued but saw the look on Gibbs' face and knew there was no point in arguing. Plus, he wasn't getting any younger; a good night's sleep would give him a fresh perspective. "Right, well then I'll just get this fine couple stored properly."

GZGZGZGZGZGZGZGZGZGZGZ

Gibbs sanded the wood slowly, letting the familiar movement sooth his mind. He wanted answers but wouldn't get any till sometime tomorrow at the earliest. That didn't sit well with him, before he'd left NCIS he'd spoken with the director about increasing security around autopsy. It did little to relax his mind that the director had agreed to post two guards until they all returned in the morning. Ziva had met him at home and he insisted she nap, something she rarely did. He had to convince her it was safe to stay in his bed to rest. She worried that they were not being careful enough. On one hand he agreed but he needed her close.

Glancing at the clock he was surprised at how early in the evening it still was. At some point he would need to stop working on his boat and figure out something to feed them. Ziva liked to cook but he had a feeling she wouldn't feel like it when she woke up from her nap. He smiled but the smile was a heavy one, his thoughts full of questions. A noise at the top of his stairs had him pausing.

Abby let herself into Gibbs place. He never minded and he never greeted her with a gun. He'd told her long ago she'd earned his trust. She was smart enough to know how meaningful that was. She'd brought his favorite beer and a pizza. Without having to look she knew he'd be in his basement working on his boat.

Despite the fact she knew he'd never hurt her Abby always came down the stairs slowly but not quietly. Standing at the top of the stairs she saw him notice her and smile. He was shirtless which she knew sometimes made him feel self-conscious but she couldn't fathom why he was damned good looking. He was sexually appealing and yet she'd never been truly sexually attracted to him. She saw him as far more, something that couldn't be put into words but the two of them understood it. It was not quite a parent child relationship and never lovers but something unnamable. He grinned again when he saw the beer.

"How did you know I just ran out of beer and I'm starving." It was true loving Ziva was testing his stamina, almost. Grabbing a beer he popped the top and took a long swallow. He was grateful Abby had stopped by he truly enjoyed her company. He was worried though when he could easily see she intended to stay for a bit. Ziva was upstairs and could come down at any moment. Her car thankfully was parked in his garage. He grabbed his phone and quickly texted her that Abby was visiting and he'd let her know when it was safe to come downstairs.

"Jethro Gibbs did you just text someone?" Abby noticed something different about him but she couldn't quite place it. The saw dust covering his sweating chest wasn't new, neither was the beer in his hand. His hair was slightly longer than he normally wore it but that wasn't it.

"I'm not quite as ignorant as I let McGee believe Abby he just likes his tech speak so I let him." Tossing the phone on his work bench he sat on the bar stool and watched Abby do the same on the one across from him.

"You're also not as mean as you let people think but I won't tell anyone that either. Seems that everyone has secrets these days." Abby had come here to talk to Gibbs about Ziva and she felt slightly guilty about it.

"Whats up Abbs?" Gibbs suspected he knew and would have to tread very carefully.

"It's Ziva. Has she told you the name of the man she's...dating?" Abby munched her pizza and avoided Gibbs' gaze. She knew Gibbs believed people deserved their privacy but she honestly was just looking out for Ziva.

Gibbs sucked in a silent breath. "Why?"

"She's very involved with him Gibbs more than any of you know. I won't break her confidence but there are aspects to their relationship that …..well, I just don't want to see her get hurt. I was thinking if you knew his name you could run a background check on him make sure he's a good guy." Abby stopped eating her pizza when she saw Gibbs grip his beer bottle just a little too tightly. Something was off in the way he wouldn't meet her eyes. She let her gaze slip away past his throat, just a quick wicked glimpse at his chest. He was after all a damn good looking man and it never hurt to look. He wore a gold chain, which she almost laughed at because it was so not something the Gibbs she knew would wear. She almost made a silly comment but something caused it stick in her throat. The pendent at the end was familiar it took a moment of staring at the cylindrical gold before it struck her. It was a key of sorts. She'd seen them many times in fact different versions of course but why would he be wearing a key? Suddenly she felt the shock of it hit her. Her eyes flew to Gibbs and saw him watching her, self damnation was in his expression but so was something else, a protective glint that if she were an enemy she would never want to see.

"You" it was just a whisper but in the silence of his basement it was as loud as shouting.

Gibbs wished he had someone to slap him on the back of the head. He'd forgotten to put a shirt on when Abby had come down the stairs and of course she'd seen Ziva's bracelet knew what it meant. For all her bubbliness Abby was smart as a whip as well. He absently clutched the small piece of gold and saw Abby swallow hard. He remained quiet as she worked things over in her mind. He needed a minute or he would say something unforgivable. Ziva made him that protective, Abby was trustworthy he knew that but for a moment the man that he was almost lashed out at her. He almost ordered her silence, felt the protective man he was nearly reach the point of threatening her. Instead he grabbed his phone and texted Ziva to come downstairs immediately.

"I guess I don't have to worry about her safety, although I feel sorry for the beer bottle it's definitely not safe." Abby had been shocked again when Gibbs had caused the beer bottle to crack in his hand. For a moment she had held perfectly still afraid if she moved too much or spoke he would lose it. Instead he'd breathed deeply and somehow gotten his immediate anger under control. A protective Gibbs was something to see. He set aside the beer bottle wiping up the mess he'd made. "A lot of things make sense now. Why she couldn't tell me. Do you have any idea Gibbs how much she..."

Gibbs nodded tersely; he knew what Abby was asking. But he couldn't let her finish the words. They were words he and Ziva only said to each other, only together, only alone where the rest of the world couldn't get in. He knew he needed to speak but he only laid his soul bare for Ziva, still if he didn't say something Abby was going to get the wrong idea. "It's not simple Abby."

"The best things never are Gibbs."

Gibbs saw a flicker of movement and saw Ziva standing there on his stairs gun in hand hair falling loose around her. It was so long now, almost touching the waistband of her slacks and only for him. Anywhere but with him she wore it contained. "It's okay Ziva"

"Oh I thought from your message something was wrong." She caught Gibbs's look, saw Abby's face and the key and suddenly she understood. Holstering her gun she came to stand by Gibbs, feeling his hand wrap in her hair she sighed. "I see."

Abby saw the way Ziva stood by Gibbs and wondered how the hell she'd missed it, and then she laughed. For a moment she couldn't stop and when she saw Gibbs fight a grin she laughed even harder. But when Ziva sat on Gibbs lap she was finally able to stop. "I can't say I'm surprised." she almost laughed again when both Gibbs and Ziva raised an eyebrow at her. "I meant it Ziva when I said I've never slept with him."

Ziva blushed at the same time Gibbs sucked in a breath and turned her to him. "You asked her if I'd slept with her." That was damn bold even for Ziva.

Abby saw no fear in Ziva's eyes but came to her rescue anyways. "It was a long time ago Gibbs, not long after she came to NCIS. She was staking a claim even then."

Ziva opened her mouth to deny it but stopped herself. Meeting Gibbs gaze she saw the question there. "I told you there were rumors, I never said I did not encourage them." turning her attention to Abby she bit her lip and spoke softly. "Abby it was my choice, Jeth...Gibbs he is my choice." Ziva quickly corrected herself when she felt the faintest tug on her hair from him.

Abby wondered if they knew the picture they made. Here in this place that was safe for them their need for each other was blatant, so was the depth of emotion they felt for each other. Gibbs was holding onto her as though he owned her and apparently in their minds he did. She wondered if he knew with his free hand he traced the bracelet Ziva wore or that Ziva by sitting on his lap was protecting him in her own way. "Before you both kill me you have to know I would never say anything, ever." Abby was dead serious and knew they saw it as well. Gibbs' grip on Ziva loosened somewhat and Ziva's stiff posture gentled.

"Thank you." Gibbs found the words were gentle as he should have been earlier when she'd seen the key and found them out. "I'm sorry about earlier." Gibbs didn't apologize but Abby deserved it. He'd reacted out of instinct rather than trusting her as he should have.

"Gibbs, what did you do?" Ziva looked from Gibbs to Abby.

Abby spoke first "When I saw the key Gibbs almost reacted badly, and I would have expected no less. He just needed a minute to calm himself down." Abby watched as Ziva took a long look at Gibbs and he allowed it. Ziva smiled at him and only then did Gibbs appear to relax. "You didn't scare me Gibbs if that's what you're worried about. If I didn't know you better you might have but I know you."

Gibbs could only nod grateful that Abby did know him so well.

Abby took a deep breath. "Well, I think I'm going to make my way back home, I've got a lot of work ahead of me tomorrow I imagine. As I said I won't say anything so don't worry ok. I'm betting the two of you have enough without adding me to the mix." Boldly she stepped forward gave Ziva a quick hug and did the same with Gibbs.

Ziva watched Abby leave and only when she heard the front door close did she turn back to Gibbs. "Jethro do not." She saw his eyes meet hers carefully. "I saw no fear in Abby did you?"

"No." Gibbs pressed his mouth to her forehead for a moment, breathing deep. "I've never been this man with anyone else Ziva. I've had to hide it or temper it, keep it at a "safe" level and with you I don't have to do that. It's liberating but it's also all consuming. The idea of you not…."

"I am yours Jethro you know that. Eventually people will find out, it's naïve to think otherwise. But no matter who finds out it changes nothing I am yours. I'm not leaving you Jethro."

Gibbs leaned against her knowing he should feel weak, he wasn't exactly acting strong but instead he felt strong. Gently he nipped at Ziva's throat and her moan brought his already hard cock even further to life. It was like that with her instantly she could make him harder than hell. "_Mine_"

It was a barely contained growl against her throat and yet it caused Ziva's body to clench and she nearly came just from the word slipping from his mouth. He chuckled against her neck knowing how she was responding. He took the knife at her hip, the one he'd made for her and slit the front of her tailored dress shirt open. Apparently he was too impatient for buttons. The fabric quickly puddled on the floor along with her bra which he had slit open as well. She arched into cool wood of the blade the feel of it against her heated skin brought a hiss from her throat.

Gibbs felt her reaction met her dark eyes and remembered how much she liked an edge of danger to everything why should this be any different? He let the knife slide slowly down her belly. She was writhing beneath his touch and it was almost too much. "shh be still, easy" He heard her whimper when the tip of the knife popped the button of her pants, and gently eased the zipper down. He set aside her gun, placing it on a high shelf. With his free hand he slipped her pants down and she stepped out of them without ever breaking his gaze. The tiny thong she wore did little to hide her from him and he felt his mouth go dry when he saw how wet she was. With a flick of his wrist the triangle of cloth fell to the ground. Carefully he set the knife back on the work table off to the side safe from where he was about to set her.

Ziva felt the slide of smooth wood beneath her and didn't hide the sound of pleasure she made. Gibbs watched her a satisfied stamp of possession marking his face. He was all about control, all the time. She knew that the single moment with Abby when he'd nearly lost that control had shaken him. Raising her hand she found the softness of his hair pulling him closer. "Neshama, please."

Gibbs didn't need any further encouragement, he freed himself from his pants and had her legs wrapped around him before she speak any further. It wasn't until he was sliding inside her that he felt sane again. Her body greeted him as it always did pulling at him drawing him deeper and closer with every thrust. His eyes found hers telling her without words that he would never let her go, savoring the acceptance he saw there of that knowledge. "I love you, Ziva."

Ziva felt what his body was driving in its own way to tell her. This was Gibbs' way of reminding her what they had was forever, would endure long after the case was finished. With heat and color enveloping her it was all she could do to hold on as he created the magic inside her she craved every moment of the day. His words whispered as her body flew into a thousand pieces imprinted themselves upon her soul as though it was the first time hearing them.


	18. The Secret He Kept

Gibbs hadn't slept well the night before. Despite making love to Ziva not just once in his basement but again in his bed should have driven him into blissful oblivion but his sleep had been restless. The thoughts of the case pushing at him, and other thoughts he'd tried to ignore, deny even. Ziva lay beside him sleeping curled into him; her hand wrapped around his bicep the gold of her bracelet soothing his tattered nerves.

Sighing he surveyed her body under the fine white sheet. She was all lean muscle and dangerous curves, a woman he would never have thought to find himself with. Still he couldn't stop the image of her from changing in his mind. The taunt planes of her stomach became rounded, her breasts fuller. No matter how hard he tried he couldn't push the image from his head. He hadn't said a word to Ziva. He wondered what that meant; he imagined Ducky could analyze the hell out of that one. Perhaps men had a biological clock as well. Whatever the reason he knew he had to say something and carefully. He didn't want to hurt her more with his suspicions.

"Neshama something lays heavy on your mind do you want to talk about it?" Ziva had woken to the feel of Gibbs' hand tracing her body through the sheet and thick tension in the air.

Gibbs leaned in and kissed her not afraid to meet her eyes but still quietly thinking. "I need to talk about it, should have discussed it with you before now. Hard part is whether I remained quiet or say something now it could hurt you either way." He felt her hand still in his; saw the very carefully veiled caution in her eyes. She held his gaze though and he did the same.

Ziva had known Gibbs was holding something back for a while. It was in the way he quietly glanced at her, or he would start to speak and then stop. Just a hint that there was something he couldn't wrap his head around. She had known when he was ready he would talk to her. "Then tell me and we will work through it together." Her heart thudded in her chest. He looked slightly unsure something she couldn't remember seeing before.

"Can you trust me enough to let me ask you a few questions first?" He saw her cock her head swallow hard and then nod. "When you first came here to America, I know your father arranged that."

Ziva sat up in the bed settling against the pillows, still touching Gibbs' hand but needing more stability than being horizontal allowed. "Yes that is true."

"How much did he arrange?" he saw her confusion, the fleeting moment of protecting that type of information. He could have been angry that she would for a moment even think of holding something back from him, yet he was proud.

"All of it, he knew things would end badly no matter what. More than that I think he knew I wouldn't want to see him after I was done here. So he arranged for the continuing liaison position, the apartment I was living in at the time, anything I would need when I came here."

It was Gibbs' turn to swallow hard, and run a hand through his hair hating the path this conversation was taking. "Did he arrange a doctor for you Ziva?"

Ziva knew she was missing something important, she was a damn smart woman and it irked her she couldn't grasp what Gibbs was hinting at. But she trusted him; he was no more comfortable asking than she was answering so she nodded unable to voice the words.

Gibbs silently cursed Eli David in every way possible and all the languages he knew. "This won't come out right Ziva but I'm going to try. You told me your father controlled every part of your life for a long time. I don't know why but my gut is telling me he has been controlling you more than you know."

Ziva saw him struggling with what he was trying to tell her. She wanted to find the words to comfort him but she could only find the desire for him to finish what he was saying. "Neshama….please"

"Sorry ZI, I'm getting there. I think he might have lied to you about your ability to have a child."

Ziva felt the words slam into her very much like a fist. She even heard the softest breath whoosh out of her. She wanted to ask him what the hell he was thinking, wanted to shout out he was crazy. But he'd said his gut was telling him, Gibbs' gut was rarely, if ever wrong. Not to mention the minute he said it her gut started screaming at her. From any other man this would have been a wild notion but Gibbs always thought things through. Breathing deep she bit her lip fighting back the tears that threatened. She hated this weakness, the fact her father could still cause her pain. "Tell me why you think this."

Gibbs watched her internal war, waited for her to tell him he was crazy. Instead he saw something in the set of her shoulders that made him move closer to her, bringing her next to him. "You said you were hurt during one of your first missions." He felt her nod against him. "I suspect that you said something about maybe not continuing with Mossad. Maybe it was just a passing comment, you might not have even meant it but I'm guessing your father heard about it. If he thought you were going to leave the fold so to speak perhaps he figured a way to keep you there. If he made you believe that you couldn't have children, would never have a family why would you leave?"

Ziva felt a shudder run through her the result of holding back both tears and anger. She thought back remembering waking up in the hospital in pain, knowing the mission had not gone as planned. Too many agents had been hurt and the information they'd retrieved hadn't been complete. The beating had been brutal. She'd been trained and the training had been no picnic but the reality of the first beating by enemy hands was not something easily overcome by her younger self. She remembered a kind nurse telling her maybe she should go home and have babies instead. She'd laughed and agreed it had to be easier than being a soldier. She'd still been pretty out of it from surgery, with no real intention of doing anything but being a soldier. Ari had been in the room, sitting beside her bed. Later that evening she'd been told she could never have children. Pushing her hair back from her face she swept aside a tear praying Gibbs wouldn't call attention to her grief. "It is very possible your gut is correct Jethro. It is something he would have done, would still do if it kept me under his wrist."

"thumb Zi,"

"Whatever." But still she smiled as he'd known she would. "I was told I would need to be monitored for a while, it seemed appropriate to stay with the same doctor for follow up care. After that it became habit to continue. When I came here my father told me he had arraigned for everything. I was surprised when that included a doctor but he is very thorough."

Gibbs didn't know what to say. Soon enough she would catch on to the rest of what he withheld. "Sorry Zi, but I'm also not."

Ziva didn't really here him she was thinking back trying to piece it together. "I should have known at some point I should have caught on. The doctor insisted I go on birth control, said it would help with healing and as an agent it was convenient." She caught his blush and again couldn't stop from grinning at him. "You can look down the barrel of a gun but I talk about "female" things and you get weird."

Gibbs fought down another blush, "I did not get weird, I just don't want to get to personal."

Despite the seriousness of what they were discussing she couldn't help but laugh. It didn't take her long to sober up. Gibbs was still watching her a little too closely. Then it hit her, so hard and fast she had to literally think to breathe.

Gibbs saw it sink in, watched her go nearly as white as the sheet wrapped around her. Still he didn't look away just waited for whatever was coming next.

"How long have you suspected?" she played with the light dusting of hair on his chest, trying to find sense in the dizzying spin in her head.

Gibbs looked her in the eye. "Only since you told me how it supposedly happened. I'm no doctor but neither am I a fool. For some reason it didn't sound right, then the more I learned about you, Eli, it still didn't seem right. What struck me most was a year or so ago, the guys and I were here playing poker, used your bathroom there was a wrapper from your birth control in the trash." He saw her wary look. "I wasn't snooping I just saw it and wondered who the hell you were sleeping with, wishing it was me. Putting all that together my gut said something was…"

"Hinky, yet you waited to say something."

Gibbs heard the censure in her voice and knew he'd earned it. "I can't excuse that, I knew if I told you what I suspected it would hurt you if I was right or if I was wrong. But I didn't like keeping it from you. "

Ziva knew she was avoiding the obvious next part of the discussion but she wasn't ready to go there just yet. "I should be angry with you Jethro." Again she had to stop and think letting the quiet lie between them. She was quiet for a long moment letting trying to understand how she felt. "You made a choice for both of us. You should have said something right away."

There was no anger in Ziva's voice just a quiet sadness that tore at him. "I know, but I will not apologize Zi. It wouldn't be honest if I did. If I apologize for something I would do again it's like lying."

Despite herself Ziva grinned, Gibbs was nothing if not honest even when he was talking about lying. She remembered in his arms hearing him tell her if he could he would give her a child. She'd responded by telling him given the choice she would have his child. Watching him watching her she smiled worry furrowed his brow and his shoulders were tense. His hand rubbed her bracelet like the talisman it was, almost furiously. She laid her hand against his cheek "Jethro I said I should be angry, somehow I cannot find the will to be." It was her turn to blush. "All the times we've been together since then you've had to know there was the possibility….."

Gibbs nodded taking in a breath and holding her hand against his jaw. "I did." He could have said more, explained more but he wanted to give her time to think.

Ziva found she could only smile; the anger wouldn't come. It didn't seem to matter to her heart that she should be angry, or that any other woman would be furious. She found she could feel the beginnings of joy seep through her. "I do not want to be angry with you Jethro. Perhaps another woman would be. I told you I trusted you when I put this bracelet on. When I accepted the man you truly are I knew it would not always be an easy choice, you warned me as much. If you are correct than I cannot find it in me to be angry over something so wonderful." Ziva felt him lean heavily against her his breath rushing out warm against her neck, his relief was tangible.

"If you had told me, we would have discussed, debated, worried about timing." She felt him tense both of them knowing the timing couldn't be worse. "I love you Jethro you keeping this from me will not change that."

"I love you Ziva, if I had thought for even a moment a baby wasn't something you wanted, I would never…" he saw her jump a bit at the word baby and bit back a grin when she glared.

"I think I made it very clear Jethro I wanted a child. I just believed it would never happen." Taking a long deep breath she knew she couldn't dance around the subject any longer. Glancing up at him she saw him grinning again. "You look smug Jethro."

"How long has it been Ziva." This time he wasn't blushing even when she caught on instantly.

Ziva had already done the math; it was why she'd had to work so hard to push her anger at her father away. She knew he'd lied or at least her body was leading her to suspect so. "just over a month." She watched triumph mixed with joy flash through his eyes. The joy so rarely seen was what stayed with her.

"Is that typical for you?" he toyed with a long lock of her hair, twirling it around his finger. He wanted instead to strip the sheet away from her, touch her feel her sliding against him.

Ziva glared again failing when she couldn't stop grinning at him. "No"

"I imagine we should clarify things, just to be sure." Gibbs heard her sigh.

"Well that would be the next thing to do. I imagine Mr. prepared for everything you already have something for that right?" He looked at her like she was crazy.

"Right, Zi, because that's just the sort of thing I wanted you to find lying around. I have no desire to be skinned alive." He'd fully expected the head slap but still it stung when it landed. "Brat"

"Do not even start with me Jethro." feeling his hands beneath the covers she swatted at them next. "If you think you are going to convince me to stay in this bed, while my head is full of questions. You are wrong. I cannot sit here not knowing."

Gibbs feigned a deep sigh, this ducking just in time to avoid her hand. "Well then you better get dressed, so we can go get something."

"We…oh yes let us both walk into a store together to buy a …" Ziva couldn't bring herself to say the words and warned Gibbs with a glare not to fill in the blanks. "I think I can manage just fine on my own Jethro."

Gibbs watched her throw on her clothes it a bit of snit and had to hide his laughter. She was occasionally glaring at him, then at one point stomped her foot and muttered something in Hebrew. He stayed back deciding it was better to let her be. When she rifled around for her keys he saw her find them and head for the door. Again she stopped laying her head against the door. She turned around leaning heavily against it. "I am not angry Jethro, I am not unhappy, I just feel…overwhelmed."

Gibbs wanted to go to her but every action told him she needed space. "It's a lot to learn in just a moment Ziva. I should have…."

Ziva held up her hand "What is done is done Jethro, I just need time to work this through in my head some more."

Gibbs watched her step out the door and let his head fall back against the headboard. He should be given a good beating for not thinking things through more. Yet he couldn't regret what he'd done.

Gibbs stood outside the bathroom door, waiting for Ziva to come out. He should have been terrified instead he was hoping, hoping for a miracle. She returned from the store faster than he would have expected, glancing at him unable to hide her nervousness. Without speaking to him she took the little brown paper bag into the bathroom and shut the door. Five long minutes later he was still waiting. Pressing his head against the wood he knew she had to have the answer by now.

"Ziva?" finally he felt the door move. It opened and she was standing there hands in her pockets, her face surprisingly unreadable.

Ziva faced him, saw the question in his eyes. "Neshama answer this for me. What do you want the answer to be?"

Gibbs leaned against the doorway, knowing she needed to hear this without the dancing around they'd done earlier. "Ziva I haven't forgotten about the case, the fact we can't be seen together, but for some damn reason none of that matters. I want this for us, maybe that doesn't make sense…." He stepped into the bathroom saw her smile.

"Neshama do not even think of apologizing for how you feel. You would do well to remember that we didn't discuss how I came to believe I couldn't conceive until well after we'd been making love more than a few times." She nodded at the counter. "It seems Jethro even nature is not willing to refuse you." She felt most of her fear slip away when shock and a grin hit his face.

Gibbs glanced at the fancy electronic stick on the counter, the little window held one word _Pregnant_. Dammed if he couldn't stop grinning, turning back to her he saw her smiling as well. "You ok?"

Ziva knew he was asking about more than just the test results. "It is hard to know that my father would lie to me in such a way but this is something I thought I'd never have. I am still a bit shocked."

Gibbs took her in his arms and was pleased when she didn't hesitate. He couldn't stop smiling even when she glanced up at him with a slight glare. "I imagine you are going to walk around all smug now."

"We can make this work Ziva I have no doubt. With any other woman I couldn't say that."

His words touched her deeper than he probably realized. "I believe you, but it will not be easy Jethro. A baby" she couldn't stop the shiver of fear that raced down her spine at that word. "Complicates things." She knew he was thinking about the couple lying in the morgue as much as she was. At the same time as she looked at him she could see no doubt in his eyes, nothing but faith in both of them.

"Can't deny that Zi, but this is good and for now maybe we could just enjoy it." She bit her lip watching him with those soulful brown eyes.

"We will need to solve this case that much faster now." She didn't voice what they were both thinking, how the danger had increased for her in just a moment. "I knew agents that were pregnant while working, somehow they managed to keep their children safe. Most of those missions were far riskier than this one."

Gibbs sucked in a deep breath hating the reminder of how wrong things could go. He couldn't be blamed for what had happened before he'd begun having suspicions but after was another story. He couldn't tuck her away at home too much was at stake. Neither was she a woman to sit idly at home. He pushed away his worries; his fear based in truth on a past loss and held on to his faith in her. "I know what you're capable of Ziva. Things will be ok."

Ziva nodded she hadn't lied to him each of those women had been forced to hide their pregnancies or be forced into a termination. "I will need to work on finding a new doctor. I would ask Abby but I do not want anyone to know."

Gibbs nodded. "I agree the quieter we keep this the better, for as long as possible." Leading her to the bed he sat next to her holding her hand. "I like having secrets with you Ziva. As much as I would like the world to know your mine I know we can't have that yet."

Ziva yawned long and hard and heard Tony chuckle. "At some point Ziva you should ask that man of yours to let you rest."

Ziva blushed and raised an eyebrow. "Perhaps I prefer to be tired Tony."

It was Tony's turn to blush and cough lightly as Gibbs walked back into the room. "Ok….then."

Ziva laughed and then turned her attention back to the crime scene photos she had taken. Something about them nagged at her. If she was being honest part of it was her lack of focus. She'd had little time to process everything that had happened early this morning. She remembered asking Gibbs if he thought she'd make a good mother.

_Gibbs heard the doubt in her voic,e surprised it. "I have no doubt."_

"_I am not sure I know what to do with a baby. I helped with Tali but that was years ago and it is not like I can just learn from a friend. No one I know has….babies." She'd thrown her hairbrush at him when she'd again stumbled over the word._

"_Whoa….no violence. You could read a book…. I think you're going to be a natural." Holding her close he kissed her forehead_

"_I appreciate your faith in me Jethro, but I like to know what to do well ahead of time. As for books not exactly the kind of thing I can have lying around my apartment. Abby is always stopping by and even if I kept them out of sight we have no idea if those at Haven are watching where we go, or for that matter there is always the chance they will find a reason to search our homes." They didn't speak about it often but they still swept both homes for bugs on a regular basis._

_Gibbs was quiet considering what she said, "You're right of course. For now Ziva don't worry we'll find a way. I wish.."_

"_So do I Neshama, but for now we must accept what is. And, now we must leave for work or we will be late. Now is not the time to start drawing suspicions." _

_Gibbs nodded but still had to work hard to pull away from her. Glancing out the window he searched for any cars that might be observing them, seeing none he nodded that it was safe for her to leave._

Ziva shook her head trying to force her thoughts back to the very important work at hand. It was quiet on the floor McGee was working with Abby in her lab, Tony was reviewing the sad bits of evidence he had collected and Gibbs was doing something on his computer. Carefully so as not to be seen she pulled up her personal calendar. Doing some silent counting she figured she was just about six weeks along. She sighed in relief, with the coming change in seasons and the fact she was still very early she had a good chance of hiding the physical changes of her pregnancy for a while. The weather was beginning to grow cooler which would mean more layers, loose sweaters and coats. If it had been the start of summer things would be very difficult. Her biggest concern at this point was finding a doctor. There was no one she could think of to ask…..except…suddenly a person flittered through her mind. It would be a risk a huge one, but she was known for her discretion. Before Ziva could think more about it she was interrupted by the mail courier, the two of them were getting to know each other well. She smiled when a small white box was placed in front of her.

Tony whistled "One can only imagine what that might be." He caught her smile and gave her one back. He didn't let it show but for just a moment his gut churned. He teased Ziva about being lucky but in reality he knew it was the man in her life who was the lucky one. The smile on her face as she opened the box, thinking of whomever that man was made him swallow hard. He caught Gibbs looking at him rather intently and forced away the thoughts threatening to creep into his mind.

Ziva opened the box and pulled out a small electronic tablet. In an unfamiliar scrawl on the included card was written "your own private bookcase….and then some.". She had to use all her strength not to turn to Gibbs; instead she turned on the device and was instantly prompted to enter a password.

Gibbs watched as Ziva bit her lip looking perplexed. He had to hide his smile at the way she stared at the tablet for a long time without entering anything.

Tony pushed away from his desk went and stood behind Ziva ignoring the way she swatted at him. "Are you just going to stare at it or try it out?"

Ziva stuck her tongue out at him, "It has a password. I am trying to figure out what it would be."

"He didn't tell you?" Tony couldn't help but admire the guy, he was if nothing else clever.

"I believe I am supposed to know what it would be. Which, is why I am thinking." Ziva had many ideas but none of them felt right. Tapping the tablet she saw the onscreen keyboard pop up, only the letters were not English.

"What's that?" Tony suspected he knew but he was trying to keep the conversation light, trying to ignore the fact Ziva was getting misty eyed next to him. Ziva in love was a whole new experience.

"That is the keyboard in Hebrew." Again Ziva wondered how it was possible Gibbs could do these things so quickly so perfectly. Then she laughed Gibbs seemed capable of getting anything he wanted. The proof of that grew inside her.

Gibbs could see the wheels turning in her mind, "Maybe it's something important to the two of you, an anniversary, a special date, a place, how long you've been together…." He shrugged, glanced at McGee who had just arrived back at his desk. "What do I know?"

Ziva bit her lip trying to not shout out just how much he did know. Instead she thought harder for some reason it was important to her to get it right the first time.

Tony spotted McGee and filled him in on what Ziva was staring at and why. "So now Ziva the perfectionist that she is, wants to get it right on the first try."

McGee chuckled "I could probably hack it if you wanted Ziva."

Ziva shook her head vehemently "No I will figure it out I just need a moment to think." She thought about what Gibbs had said, they didn't have a special place, a special date, it always seemed they'd been together forever. She smiled then knowing exactly what he was trying to tell her.

Tony and McGee saw her eyes light up, saw the stiff set of her shoulders soften, but it was McGee who spoke first. "No hack needed I see."

Ziva smiled and carefully typed in the word _Forever_

She laughed aloud when the screen showered with pretend fireworks and congratulations swept into view.

"That's quite the statement just for figuring out a password." Tony squeezed her shoulder and made his way back to his desk.

Ziva knew the congratulations was about more than figuring out the password, but kept that to herself. Looking at the files loaded on the tablet she saw one marked private. The file names were labeled in Hebrew but when she touched on it everything inside opened in English. As the file opened she found downloaded books on pregnancy, birth and raising a toddler, there were links to websites with more information and even a list of baby names, a long list. Seems he'd been right and they'd found a way for her to do just what she'd wanted to.

She wanted to read those books right away, wanted nothing more than to sit on her couch with a bag of chocolate chip cookies and learn everything there was to know about motherhood. Instead she shut down the tablet slid it into her desk and turned her attention back to work. The sooner the case was solved the sooner her life could get back to its new version of normal.


	19. Much Ado About NothingSort Of

_I apologize for the long delay in this update. Real Life has been more than hectic and I started writing this one four times only to start over each time. I hope to get the updates up quicker in the future. I have so much planned for this story that it's just waiting to get out.:) Thank you to everyone who is following and reviewing this story._

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Gibbs stared at the two dead bodies in front of him. He wanted more answers than he was getting but would be forced to wait. Ducky had just informed him that the unwrapping of the bodies hadn't led too much in the way of evidence. More traces of gold dust had been found along with traces of an unidentified powder Ducky guessed to be from latex gloves. He'd found small puncture wounds on the necks of each victim which led him to believe that that they had been injected with something that Abby was running a tox screen on. He suspected it was the cause of death being that there were no other injuries.

"Gibbs there is no point in standing there obsessing over something you can't change." Ducky stared at Gibbs for a long moment watching his face knowing something more than then case was on his mind. "Is there something you want to talk about Gibbs?"

Gibbs swallowed hard, glanced over at Ducky then back at the bodies. "Can't."

"Is it really can't or just won't?" Ducky stepped over to his desk giving Gibbs some space and time to think.

"Want to Duck but I can't. It's complicated." It was the truth. He wanted to talk to Ducky, about the case, about Ziva even about the baby. But, damned if he wasn't caught between the proverbial rock and a hard place. Ducky wouldn't tell anyone but the more people that knew the harder it was to keep secrets. Now more than ever it was important that as few people as possible knew.

Ducky watched Gibbs saw the frustration on his face and wished he could offer some sort of comfort. "I just wanted you to know I was here if you needed to talk Jethro." Ducky saw Gibbs glance at his watch, something he noticed the other man doing a lot of lately. He'd heard the rumors as much as everyone else, that Gibbs was seeing someone. But despite the women that had moved in and out of Jethro's life Ducky had never seen him anxious to leave work, the job behind. Lately he'd noticed him leaving work on time, taking longer lunches and even leaving early. There was even a rumor he'd put in for vacation time. It made Ducky smile, a happy Gibbs, more correctly a truly happy Gibbs was a rare sight to see.

Gibbs caught the stare and the smile "What's that look for?"

"Whatever you can't talk about seems to make you happy. I don't put much stock in rumors but if it's true that a woman is making you happy I'm glad." Ducky saw Gibbs half-smirk, heard the low chuckle and found himself laughing.

"As I said Ducky it's complicated. But yeah it's good, real good."

Ducky nodded. "Well then, when you can I'm sure you'll tell me more." Ducky glanced at the bodies on his table. "The screens will take hours and I will examine the bodies more but it's already late."

Gibbs shook his head lightly, knowing Ducky was urging him to go home. Funny thing was that work still made him happy, still gave him the satisfaction of a job well done but home, Ziva, that draw was bigger and it shocked him. "Yeah, it is. Probably should go home."

Ducky gave a wave as Gibbs stepped onto the elevator. Turning his attention back to the bodies he though back to a time when as a young man he'd had brief liaison with a young woman of Egyptian decent. Grinning he remembered she'd had a particular love of massage oil.

Ziva couldn't concentrate on her work. She was lucky she wasn't doing much of anything important. All the evidence, or lack of, gathered from the scene had been dealt with and until they had more from Abby or Ducky they were left shuffling paper. But still she couldn't concentrate. All she could think about was the baby. Having found out only that morning had left her little time to process the very real fact she was going to be a mother. Glancing at the clock she decided it was pointless to try to get anything more done. Besides she was tired and starving. She watched Gibbs step off the elevator and make his way to his desk. Biting her lip she cleared her throat and approached him. "Did Ducky have anything new for you?"

Gibbs shook his head, "Nope won't know much till at least tomorrow." Gibbs was ready to go home, it wasn't terribly early but it also wasn't as late as he normally stayed. He hated the fine line he was forced to walk between keeping the appearance of normal and living his life.

"I was hoping I could head out, I am tired and had plans this evening." From the corner of her eye she saw Tony smirk, it was the first time she'd ask to leave before the rest of the team and he hadn't failed to notice.

Tony figured Ziva was a brave woman, most of the time if you asked Gibbs to leave work early you ended up staying late. Then again they weren't exactly being very productive. It was a sad day when Gibbs' team was left to shuffling paper. Despite how promising the case had looked from the start the waiting was leaving them with not much to do.

Gibbs had to work carefully too hide his worry when Ziva asked to leave before anyone else. He wanted to ask her if she was ok, if something was wrong with the baby and he could do none of those things. Right in that moment he could have done with a stiff shot of bourbon. "Yeah, I think we should all head out. No point in wasting our energies here. At some point this case will pick up and then we might be lucky if we get to go home."

GZGZGZGZGZGZGZGZGZGZGZGZGZG

Staring at her now empty plate Ziva took a deep breath she'd expected Gibbs to be less than thrilled at her suggestion. She'd expected the swearing and the pacing. She hadn't expected his flat out refusal. It had nothing to do with the bracelet she wore; it wasn't that sort of command. But he told her no and it had been all Gibbs the soldier that had forced that word out between clenched teeth.

"Not just no Ziva hell no." Gibbs was working hard not to yell but it was work to see through the haze of red anger and be civil.

"It was only a suggestion Jethro." Ziva felt her temper rise, normally she could reign in her anger especially when she understood Gibbs' anger came from his protective nature but tonight it was proving difficult.

"How can you even think about wanting her to know, to help you with this?" Gibbs tried hard to hide his anger knew he was failing and that pissed him off further. He slammed the fridge open and grabbed a beer.

"I thought it was a logical choice, she is known for her discretion. I would assume in her line of work she would know of a doctor who was equally good at being discreet."

"Dammit Ziva, Holly Snow does not need to know any more about us than she already does, not about the baby and I sure as hell don't want you being associated with her. You start showing up where she is, meeting with her in private….whatever. I don't want my….you getting that sort of reputation." Gibbs had to take a long abrupt swallow of beer. He'd almost called Ziva his wife, and from the shocked look on her face she hadn't failed to notice. When had he started thinking of her as his wife? It felt right, it was essentially what they were to each other. Hell even his lawyer had seen it that way but to verbalize it, he laid his head against the cupboard door trying to catch his breath.

Ziva knew what he hadn't said it shocked her more even than his concern for her reputation. It whisked away her anger bringing her to stand next to Gibbs, resting her hand on his shoulder. "Neshama I will not go to Holly Snow, I will not ask for her assistance on this. I came to you with it because I wanted to know how you felt about it. It obviously upsets you, so I will do this another way."

Gibbs pulled her into his arms, "I didn't mean to get angry Ziva, I yelled..I just…"

"It is ok Jethro, you do not need to say anymore." Ziva slipped from his arms and moved to the table to clear their dinner dishes.

Gibbs watched her move gracefully through the simple act of washing the dishes. He normally helped or did some other chore while she worked on cleaning up after dinner, tonight his mind was churning. "Ziva does it bother you that we aren't married?"

Ziva dropped the silverware she'd been loading in the dishwasher, looking up at him in surprise. Gibbs didn't talk about marriage, sometimes he alluded to it or commitment but not the actually subject of marriage. "Jethro, it is not like we have been together for years."

"Long enough Ziva and that isn't what I asked." Gibbs set his beer down focusing all his attention on her.

Ziva met his gaze but found it was harder than normal, "Jethro when I put on this bracelet, I committed myself to you. In my heart we are as good as married."

Gibbs smiled softly. "I know that Ziva, knew it that night. I don't take that commitment lightly or my part in it any less. I'm asking if it bothers you that legally we aren't married." He watched her eyes dance away from his, down to their linked hands, to the buttons on his shirt anywhere but his eyes. "I want the truth Ziva."

Ziva damned the hormones making her feel like crying. She couldn't lie to him; maybe she should have found a way despite his insistence of honesty. "I do not know how to answer you Jethro. I never want more than you can give. I love you and what we have. It has always been enough." she waited for him to say something to give her an out but he remained still and quiet. "Now though it would be a lie to say I have not thought about it. And after this morning, knowing about the baby I thought about it a lot today."

Gibbs caught her face in his hands tilting her up to look at him. It was moments like this that he was reminded of Ziva's youth. She was a strong, amazing woman and his equal in every way. Her youth didn't worry him like it had before but it did remind him there was much she hadn't known in her life. "Thought about it too. Wasn't going to mention it, because women don't usually appreciate that sort of thing right after finding out their pregnant. Or so I've heard. If I'm being honest Ziva I've thought about it lately too, before today." He almost laughed at the surprise on her face, almost until he saw the uncertainty in her eyes. "I wouldn't lie to you about something like this Ziva. I've been yours since the night you put that bracelet on. I knew what it meant to you and it meant the same to me. But if we're both being honest it isn't exactly the same as being legally married."

"I do not need it to be legal Jethro. What I need is you, that is enough." She met his gaze allowing him to see that there was no doubt in her.

Gibbs nodded, having so much more to say but knowing that he needed time to think first. He brushed a strand of hair behind her ear. "I love you Ziva." then he let his hand slide gently down to her belly. He rested his hand there reminding both of them of the other great truth between them.

"I could not think this afternoon. I kept remembering the baby. It almost does not feel real." She saw Gibbs smile and knew he felt the same. He started to say something but stopped looking almost ashamed. "What? What is it you are not saying?"

"I just was going to say that it comes and goes that feeling, until they're born and then sometimes for a while after they're here." Gibbs stepped back running a hand through his hair. "I don't mean to draw comparisons ….

Ziva knew what Gibbs was referring to knew why he hesitated to say more. "Jethro it will not make me angry for you to talk about Shannon or Kelly I have told you before Talking about your family is not going to push me away."

"I've done this before but I was gone… deployed for most of Shannon's pregnancy and so I missed a lot" Gibbs took his half empty beer and tossed it in the trash. "I don't want to do that with you. I don't want to make mistakes with you like I did with the other women after Shannon. They should have meant something; I should have treated them better, made them part of my life not just someone in it. Somehow you and I we made this work, more than work we're happy. I don't want to screw that up by saying the wrong thing." Gibbs felt naked, vulnerable something only he ever experienced with her.

Ziva ran a hand through her hair saw Gibbs eyes flash with desire as she did so and smiled. "Jethro I am absolutely certain that we will screw up with each other at least once. One or both of us will say something wrong at some point. But I would hope, more than that I know that whatever we do to each other we can get through." She might have said more but a yawn fought its way out.

"Time for bed Ziva," Gibbs watched the flush of desire wash across her and felt his body respond in kind. "It's amazing to me that you want me like you do Ziva."

Ziva stepped into his embrace and pressed a kiss to his neck. She felt the flutter of his racing pulse and the length of him against her thigh. "I cannot remember a time when I have not wanted you. Take me upstairs and make love to me Neshama."

Ziva was surprised when Gibbs lit a candle on his dresser. The soft glow cast away the dark shadows in the room, catching his hair softly demanding her touch. As always he leaned into that touch his head resting against her palm. When they were alone Gibbs never failed to share his need of her or his love. As much as she was a different woman with him he too was a different man. One the rest of the world didn't see. His hands reached between them gently undoing the buttons on her dress. She was forced to let her hands drop from his face when he moved to push the dress of her shoulders.

Gibbs was awed by how much Ziva gave to him. She accepted him as he was, rarely asking anything of him. Yet he felt completed by her, the missing that had left him feeling empty before her was filled. Her dress hit the ground and he sucked in a breath at the way the candle light washed over her skin. She'd been wearing nothing underneath the dress. Her skin was made for gold, the necklace around her throat, the bracelet and the candle light made her appear almost luminous. His hand slid gently across her shoulder to her collar bone gliding across her chest until he was cupping one breast. His thumb grazed softly across her nipple. Her head fell softly against his chest, her soft intake of breath loud in the quiet of the room. He felt a rush of satisfaction in the knowledge that such a simple touch could make her feel so much. Brushing his lips against her ear he pressed a gentle kiss.

"I hadn't notice it before, wasn't looking but your bigger here. Just slightly but I can tell. Does it hurt when I touch you this way?"

Ziva drew in a breath as he swiped his thumb across her breast again. "No Neshama it is far from pain that I feel when you touch me. If anything I am more sensitive to your touch but in no way do I feel pain."

Gibbs let his free hand mirror the actions of the other, knew she was telling the truth when her hands grasped his shoulders tightly. "If that changes Ziva tell me, don't hesitate. I never want to hurt you."

Something in his voice told Ziva he was talking about more than touching her. She felt a wash of love equal to the pleasure he was creating take her. "You would not hurt me Jethro, but I will tell you." She felt him pause in his stroking and turned her face to meet his eyes. "I am thinking I should work on reading those books you downloaded for me. There is much I do not know about having a baby."

It was his turn to rest his head on her shoulder. "you said I would walk around all smug and I think you're partly right Zi. I know all the reasons we should be worried about this baby. But, all I can feel is proud. Amazed even that we created a child." he felt himself blush and was grateful she couldn't see his face. "I know that sounds….."

"It sounds beautiful." Ziva felt the wetness of joy on her face and brushed a thumb across her cheeks. That quick gesture caught his attention and he was once again looking at her. "I feel it too Neshama. You have given me something I never thought I would have. But, more than that I wanted it to be you. I had known for a long time that I would not have children; until I met you it had not really bothered me. Then I fell in love with you and that is when I felt the loss. Now even though I have no idea what I am doing I am excited rather than scared."

Gibbs felt his throat tighten with emotion. He pulled her close capturing her mouth with his own. Despite the desire raging through him his assault was gentle. His tongue thrusting softly into the silk of her mouth. His hand clenched in her hair the other on her bare hip.

Ziva was caught off guard by the gentleness of his touch. From the expression on his face she had expected his lovemaking to be laced with intensity. Instead every touch was a slow glide of pleasure. His hands traced every inch of her figure, minutes or hours could have passed and she felt herself pressed underneath him on the bed. Somehow she had missed him removing his clothing but it was hard to miss the slide of his skin against hers. Strength permeated every movement yet the gentleness was always there.

Gibbs had to hold back the urge to bury himself deep inside her the moment his bare skin met hers. It was even more of a struggle when gasped out his name. He managed a control over his body, taking the time to press kisses along the flat plane of her stomach. He wanted to take his kisses further but her hands in his hair tugged him back up her body caused him to chuckle lightly. "No patience tonight Zi?"

"I need you Neshama, inside me now." Ziva heard the low rumble of desire that was Gibbs' response. She felt him grasp her hips and ever so slowly slide inside her.

Gibbs knew he'd never know a pleasure that equaled that of being inside of Ziva. He'd imagined being with her many times but nothing compared to the reality of it. Her body fluttered around him alternately clamping tight and letting go. It overwhelmed him taking away all coherent thought.

Ziva felt a sweat break out over her body. Every movement Gibbs was made was carefully controlled the slow push of hips against hers was driving her out of her mind. Color swirled in her mind and her heartbeat thundered in her ears. In a moment she was flying apart in his arms driven over the edge by every gentle stroke.


	20. Face in the CrowdMoment of Rapture

_Just a note to all my faithful readers. I'm sorry for the delay in posting this update. I've been dealing with some health issues and needed to focus on other things. Hopefully the next update won't take as long. Thank you for sticking with me._

* * *

Ziva looked across the room and for the first time in the three of their visits to Haven saw someone she recognized. It was shocking and she wasn't entirely sure how she felt about it. The idea was to be seen get to know people and see what they could find out as a result, but the actual moment of it happening was still unsettling. Commander Faith Coleman was not anyone she might have expected to see in Haven but when she saw the hand she as holding across the breakfast table was that of a woman she understood why.

"Ziva?" Gibbs had been watching her work her way through a breakfast made for a lumberjack. He was amazed at how much she could eat. Then, in a moment she'd gone from focusing on her food to zeroing in on something behind him.

"Lieutenant Commander Faith Coleman is sitting behind us. It will not be long before she notices us." She wanted to ask him how they should play things but as always the moment they entered Haven they slipped into their roles. It had been a spontaneous choice to come in far earlier than they had before. Stopping in before work for breakfast had paid off. Glancing at her watch she saw that they still had better than an hour before had to be at NCIS.

Gibbs had to work hard not to look behind him, instead he took Ziva's hand in his own. Brushing his fingers across her knuckles he met her gaze and offered a smile. Trying to tell her without words that they could get through this. All this time they had been making the effort to keep their secret and now, would test that secret. It wasn't so much that he was afraid of what would happen if people found out, but the fact that things were moving in the right direction. What that could mean for them and the victims was unsettling.

Ziva smiled at the silent message Gibbs was sending her, he'd always been able to do that even from the beginning. She laughed lightly and it was that sound that drew Faith's gaze toward her. Faith looked toward her grinned in the way strangers do and turned back toward her companion. Ziva counted to five and watched as Faith turned back toward her shock evident on her face, then ever so slowly toward Gibbs who was tracing her knuckles with his fingers. The shock flared brighter causing her mouth to drop open. Ziva almost laughed except Faith looked as though she might fall over. Ziva smiled back watching as Faith finished saying goodbye to the companion across from her and began making her way toward them. Ziva didn't miss the faint blush on Faith's cheeks she knew had to match her own. Before she could reach the table she heard Gibbs whisper softly.

"_Mine" _

_As always that simple word washed over her like a balm. Faith was at their table and had focused her attention on Gibbs. _

"_Gibbs?" Faith managed to get his name out but her voice stuck in her throat after that. New members were not common place at Haven, showing up once maybe twice a year. Occasionally it was someone she knew but rarely someone that held much interest for her. From the moment she'd met Gibbs and his team she'd been intrigued. They were a close knit group, honorable, and honor was important to her. On a personal level she'd found herself attracted to both Gibbs and Ziva. Never would she have expected find them together at Haven of all places._

"_Faith. Good to see you." They'd been informed in their introductory meeting that rank didn't apply at Haven. Respect was required but as for rank everyone was considered equal once they entered . So he left off her rank. He glanced briefly at Ziva whose hand he was still holding and found something off in her expression. He gave her a questioning look and she shook her head swallowed hard and grabbed for her water glass._

"_A surprise to be fair. I haven't seen you here before." Faith felt awkward standing there hovering over the table while they were seated but her curiosity won out._

_Gibbs grinned "Kinda new. Just getting the feel of the place." Gibbs tried to focus on being friendly. If they played their cards right Faith could be a source for information. But out of the corner of his eye he saw Ziva close her eyes tightly._

_Ziva had thoroughly enjoyed her breakfast now however she was feeling her stomach dance and it was not getting any better. She felt a fine sweat break out and knew she was in trouble. Standing abruptly she tried to cover her panic. "Excuse me I'll be right back."_

_Gibbs watched Ziva flee the table and instantly knew why. He fought the grin and the concern when Faith began speaking. _

"_I didn't mean to upset her." Faith saw Gibbs' wave of the hand to sit in the vacant chair. After a moment's hesitation she took a seat._

"_You didn't." Gibbs grabbed his coffee cup. "I can see the wheels turning Faith."_

"_Just surprised Gibbs. I never suspected. I heard the rumors but working with you I thought they were just that." Faith watched something she couldn't recognize pass over his face._

"_I keep hearing about these rumors, no one has been brave enough to go into detail about them. Are you brave enough Faith?" Gibbs saw her flush lightly and almost shook his head. He'd have been a fool to miss the way she'd looked at Ziva and if he was being honest him as well. Ziva might not have ever noticed but he had. So if anyone had listened to the rumors it would have been Faith._

_Faith took a deep breath. Gibbs had always one for hard questions. "I was chatting with someone in the office. I asked if Ziva was seeing anyone." Faith lifted her chin. She'd never been ashamed of her orientation and her attraction to Ziva wasn't shameful either. "I was told that she was very taken. That despite the fact she occasionally dated the two of you were an item. I'm not unfamiliar to open relationships so I assumed that was what you two shared. Now and then I'd come upon conversations that were about the two of you. It was very clear that you two were…." Faith stopped speaking when Ziva returned to the table._

_Gibbs felt Ziva squeeze his hand telling him in her own way that she was fine. "Sorry I did not mean to leave so abruptly I just needed a minute."_

_Faith smiled at Ziva trying hard to ignore Gibbs' piercing blue gaze that rested on her. "Gibbs and I were just catching up."_

_Gibbs laughed "It's alright Faith Ziva and I have no secrets." turning towards Ziva he nodded at Faith "I asked her to tell me what she'd heard about us." He watched Ziva blush and was reminded that she had known of the rumors and done nothing to stop them. "Apparently they think we've been taking advantage of elevators." _

_Ziva swung her head to Faith who looked equally shocked only to hear Gibbs laugh even louder. Punching him in the arm she apologized to Faith. "He has a twisted sense of humor."_

"_Actually I did hear about a time you two were trapped in an elevator, there is a lot of speculation about those hours." She watched them both turn to each other surprise in their eyes. They were in tune with each other. Movements mirroring each other, everything effortless and displaying a deep connection she was surprised she hadn't seen before. "So how long have you two been…."_

_Ziva didn't know how to answer that. She was caught off guard, they had alluded in their original meeting that they'd been together far longer than they had. But they'd never discussed a specific time. So she answered from her heart "It feels like always."_

_Faith saw a depth of emotion in Ziva's eyes that was almost hard to look at, even more so when she saw the same in Gibbs. She didn't know what to say so she just nodded. "Then I'm glad Haven found you. It's good here. People are friendly once they get to know you. At first it can be odd for lack of a better word _

_but you get used to it."_

"_You are the first person we have seen so far that we know. We have recognized a few people but it is good to see a friendly face." Ziva held onto Gibbs' hand needing the effortless way he grounded her. "But it is odd. We are so used to hiding that it feels strange to talk with someone we know._

_Faith nodded, "You get used to it, for the most part, after a while. The military is not exactly friendly to relationships that fall out of the norm. Considering I'm more open than most even the more lax policies now in effect would not approve of my lifestyle. Haven is important to me."_

_Neither Gibbs or Ziva missed the barely there warning in Faith's voice. She blushed when they gave her a soft smile. But, it was Ziva that spoke first. "The last thing we want is for Haven to be discovered for what it really is. New as we are we understand that it is important."_

"_Sorry, it's just there are some good people here. We tend to take care of each other." _

_Gibbs tried not to let his thoughts sway to the dead bodies in the morgue. "We care more about keeping our own secrets than what other people are hiding Faith." that much at least was the truth._

_Faith knew her discomfort wasn't mainly because of the fact they were new, and more because of her attraction to them both. When she looked at Gibbs she knew he saw everything she tried to hide. It was unsettling and made her wonder how long he'd known. Ignoring the questioning look that had just begun to creep over Ziva's face she met Gibbs' gaze. "I respect people's boundaries Gibbs."_

_Gibbs laughed again heard Ziva draw in a breath and smiled. "I wasn't worried about it Faith. I'm just a bit overprotective of Ziva. It's not personal."_

_Faith nodded seeing the truth of his words. More than that she saw something in Ziva that made her realize that overprotective was an understatement for Gibbs. "Just clarifying."_

_Ziva blushed when she realized what Faith and Gibbs had been referring to. She wasn't naïve she knew that there had been women that had found her attractive over the years. She had suspected the other woman might have been attracted to her but hadn't acted on it. "I did not mean to lead you to believe…"_

_Faith offered a gentle smile. "You didn't. As Gibbs can probably tell you it's just something about you." Faith blushed again but didn't look away. Watching Ziva she saw something there that made her realize she hadn't been entirely mistaken in her interest. Deciding discretion was in her best interest she said nothing but stood up. "I have to be at work soon, but perhaps we can have dinner some time."_

_Gibbs rose as she made to leave. "That would be nice. You know how to get in touch with us." she nodded to both him and Ziva and then left._

_Turning to Ziva he saw her gathering up her purse readying to leave. "You ok?"_

_Ziva smiled. "Yes I am fine the orange juice did not agree with me. I imagine it will not be the last time my stomach rebels."_

_Gibbs grinned watched her laugh and was reminded how lucky he was. It wasn't until they were in his car and headed back to her home for her to pick up her car that he spoke again. She'd been quiet and he suspected he knew why. "Does it really surprise you that she finds you attractive Ziva?"_

"_No," Ziva wasn't sure how to voice the rest of what she was thinking so she remained silent. Staring out the window she could feel Gibbs glancing at her now and then._

_Gibbs saw her carefully neutral face and suddenly understood. "The feeling is mutual then, that explains a lot."_

_Ziva swung her gaze to meet his, only to find him watching the road. "I do not know how to respond to that Jethro. Initially when I understood her interest I was attracted to her. However there was never the true motivation to act on it. Now that I'm with you I would never."_

_Gibbs had to fight the grin he knew she wouldn't understand. They had reached her place after perusing the block twice for anyone that might be watching. He slid his car into her garage seeing the question in her eyes he just motioned for her to follow him inside._

_Ziva glanced at her watch and saw they were fast losing time but Gibbs made his way into her house with that unhurried way of his. He sat on her couch and held out his hand "Come here Zi."_

_She glanced again at her watch "Jethro…we will be late."_

_Gibbs did smile this time. "don't care." he waited until she sat across from him. "Ziva, I love you. This what we have is special. I haven't shared something like this before with a woman. I loved Shannon and it was real and special in it's own way. I would never make light of it or compare it to what we have. The reason I bring it up though is I think, worry you believe you have to hold back from me. I fell in love with who you are, all the things that make you this woman. That isn't going to change if you tell me you find another woman attractive, or another man for that matter." he saw the shock hit her eyes, the disbelief. "You are a beautiful passionate woman Zi. You had an adventure filled life, you have a past, a life filled with history that doesn't go away because you're with me. We don't have an ordinary relationship Zi and that works for us."_

_Ziva swallowed deep. "I love you Jethro, only you nothing will change that."_

_Gibbs heard the absolute sincerity in her voice but it was followed by a hesitation to say more. "I shouldn't tell you this, because I'm sure it will lump me in the category of typical male but….I knew she was interested in you Ziva saw it from the first time she looked at you. Many times I pictured the two of you together. Not a very original fantasy but the truth."_

_Ziva saw Gibbs' blush, felt his hand stroking hers and shook her head with a gentle laugh. "I am a very lucky woman Jethro. You give me such freedom." She saw his raised brow._

"_Ironic all things considered Zi." he stroked her bracelet, feeling his body respond to everything it represented. _

"_I belong to you Jethro. And still you are openly giving freedoms that other men in typical relationships could not. And you are not the only one who has had fantasies."_

_Gibbs might have asked for more details but his phone rang and the caller ID showed it was Tony. He kept his eyes locked on Ziva while he answered. "Yeah Gibbs."_

_Tony glanced up at Vance's office and then back at his computer screen. "Hey boss. Vance filled me in that he sent you and Ziva to look into a bar brawl from last night. He said you shouldn't need any help but I wanted to make sure."_

_Gibbs was surprised. He'd mentioned to Vance the night before that they were going to try Haven again, and there was a chance they might run late. Apparently he had their back even when it came to the little things. "We're good Tony, just need to wrap up here it wasn't a real Marine just some guy trying to impress the ladies. Going to have a chat with him. " glancing at his watch he was surprised by the time. "We should be back in after lunch."_

_Tony stared at the paperwork on his desk and the total lack of evidence from the mummy case and sighed in frustration. "Well nothings changed here so no rush." Tony stared at the phone for a long time after he hung up._

_McGee saw Tony staring off and wondered at his look. "Boss okay Tony?"_

"_Yeah and that's what's weird he sounds good lately, relaxed…it's just odd."_

_Mcgee laughed knowing exactly what Tony was referring to, he'd noticed it as well. "I know what you mean. But it's a good thing right."_

_Tony nodded "Yeah of course." he meant it, but he also felt the inevitable change that was coming. He was a grown man and yet still it bothered him._

_Gibbs hung up the phone with Tony. "Vance covered us we don't have to get back to work until after lunch."_

_Ziva saw the desire that washed over him as he spoke, any questions she might have had as to how or why slid away. "Lucky us." _

_Gibbs stood her up in front of him and quickly removed her clothing. Her skin fairly glowed in the soft light that filtered through the curtains. "You are so beautiful Ziva….." He leaned down and took her mouth far more gently than the need in him wanted him to be._

_Ziva felt his tongue thrust deeply in her mouth and for just a moment it was like the first time. He took her face in his hands holding her almost reverently. He pulled away slightly and she saw some unfamiliar emotion flicker across his face. Then in a moment she recognized the shifting of his mood, the deeper need and the change in his touch. She felt a shudder run through her, desire making her body go soft and wet. _

"_You amaze me Ziva"_

_Ziva nipped gently at the thumb grazing her lip before looking at him. "Neshama?"_

"_You see it in me, this man I can only be with you and every time I watch it turn you on. It's a saving grace to me Zi. It's how I know, it's what you really want."_

"_Need Jethro, not just want." She followed his hand as it traced it's way down her chest to touch the tip of her breast. _

_Gibbs watched her for a moment before he could find his voice. "I pictured her doing this Ziva." he felt her breathe in then tremble. He met her gaze saw she knew just who he was referring to. "I imagined her taking your mouth, while she touched you." mimicking his words Gibbs let his lips slide over hers while his hand slipped between her thighs. It was his turn to catch his breath when he felt how wet how damn ready she was._

_The shock of his words and the image they created in her mind shot desire through her fast and hard. When Gibbs' fingers thrust inside her she couldn't hold back the low moan of need. "Jethro…."_

_Gibbs picked her up and carried her into her room, laying her on the bed he made quick work of his clothes. "What's it like Ziva? To taste another woman?" he watched her blush deeply, while her hips rose to meet his touch. _

_Ziva hadn't expected his question, it was as bold as forceful as Gibbs' thrusting fingers. "Jethro…."_

_Gibbs smiled Ziva was larger than life in so many ways, and she had done many things in her life. Yet there was still so much he wanted to share with her. "I imagine the feel of woman's touch on your skin is different than a mans. Tell me how."_

_Ziva let her dark eyes find his brilliant blue ones her voice came out breathy and in short gasps "Softer…with more confidence." Clearing her throat she started again "A first time with a woman, they usually are more confident than the first time with a man. A woman knows what feels good to her so she uses that to her advantage. Knows just where to stroke, how hard to touch…."her words trailed off as he pressed a kiss to the hollow between her breasts. "The first time you touched me….it was like you knew me already."_

_Jethro nipped gently at her throat, "I thought about it often Ziva. I imagined touching you many many times."_

"_Of all the men I have been with I have never had one pleasure me as you do." Ziva couldn't quite meet his gaze as she spoke. _

_Gibbs turned them till she was straddling his waist. The abrupt change of position and intimate contact had her head falling back. Only when she'd caught her breath did she finally meet his gaze again. "Wasn't looking for a compliment Ziva and any lack of pleasure you felt was their failure not yours. Your body knows just what it wants, I just happen to be a good listener."_

_He almost laughed at the way she smiled until he felt her slide over him. Her hot wetness engulfed him painstakingly slowly. His hands found their way to her hips stilling her in place before he lost himself inside her. "You were meant to be mine Ziva."_

_Ziva shifted her hips feeling a wave of pleasure wash over her, spots of color floated in her vision making her smile yet again. "I have been telling you this all along Jethro." His hands cradled her breasts, stroking and pulling just enough to make her clench around him. _

_Gibbs felt her body tighten around him and knew he'd be damn lucky to survive another minute of waiting. His hands trailed down between his fingers pushed between her barely there curls it took only a the softest of touches and she was thrusting her hips into his and calling out his name. It was all he'd been waiting for. Pulling her down against his chest he let his hips bury deep one last time and then he was lost to the scent and feel of Ziva wrapped around him._


	21. Interrogations and Revelations

Gibbs glanced at Ziva as they stared at the screen. The handsome man and beautiful woman staring back at them were nothing like the dried out husks lying in the morgue. The DNA results had come back after an exhaustive search. It had been two days since Gibbs and Ziva had shared that blissful morning together. Despite their forced absences from each other refocusing their energy on the case wasn't taking as much effort as they thought it might have. The man a Marine lieutenant by the name of Simon Phelps had in life been a credit to his country. In his private life he'd been less than so to his wife. The body of the woman found with him had been that of Lara Fields a woman suspected to be his mistress. His grieving wife had looked upon her picture with a mixture of hatred and pity.

The military data base had held his DNA which was why he'd been identified. Lara had only been identified by Simon's wife. Her family would be notified shortly. Whether or not there was a connection to Haven remained to be seen. But with the secrets the man was keeping the possibility seemed to be more than not. Ziva stepped away from the screen and made her way slowly to the room where they could watch interrogations. Through the two way glass she watched the new widow crying softly. The woman beautiful in her own right stared at a picture of her husband. The set of her shoulders gave voice to the anger that mixed with her grief. Ziva wanted to comfort her but found she had no words, she'd never been married and every man before Gibbs had betrayed her in some way. Nothing she could say would offer relief. She saw a flicker of movement in the corner of her eye. Turning she found Tony watching her carefully.

Tony lounged against the doorjamb needing a bit of distance from Ziva. She'd been watching the Marine's wife so many emotions crossing her face he almost reached out to comfort her. It was only the fact that it wasn't his right that held him back. "You ok Ziva?"

"I do not understand Tony how people can cross that kind of line." Ziva bit her lip turning back to the glass. "To lie in such a way."

Tony stepped into the room coming to stand next to her. Mirroring her stance he watched the grieving woman knowing she was waiting for Gibbs to return and tell her she could leave. "It's a sorry excuse Ziva but people are human they make mistakes." he took a deep breath before he continued. "Are you worried? Has something happened..."

Ziva cocked her head at Tony holding silent for a moment wondering how much she could comfortably share knowing his concern was genuine. She was much like Gibbs when it came to sharing her emotions, it was a risk. Risks were what she did for a living but that was work and when it came to the more personal aspects of her life she wasn't so daring. Of course Gibbs was the biggest risk of all. Glancing again at Tony who looked more worried than he had before her long silence she saw worry, and something that looked like a man waiting to come to the rescue. She smiled slightly "No Tony I am not worried." she saw his look of uncertainty, watched him run a hand along the back of his neck and bite back some question he wasn't willing to verbalize. "I may not explain this well and will probably tell you more than you want to know but...I _know_ he would never hurt me this way. If he had a need or desire that was not met he would come to me with it and we would face it, whatever that involved. Because of this there would be no need for a lie. The same is true for me." She couldn't fight the blush the words brought, knew the instant Tony understood and the knowledge in his eyes forced her to turn back to the glass.

Tony didn't know what to say. Ziva had shared more than he might have expected and the flame on her cheeks told him she might be regretting it and still he couldn't find the words.

"I shocked you, I am sorry. It was not appropriate..." Ziva felt the burn of embarrassment run through her. She moved to leave the room pausing only when Tony caught her arm gently.

"Ziva I'm not judging you." His hand clenched at his side "It's not my place to judge in the first place. Your life, how you live it, all that matters to me is that you're happy. That he treats you well."

Ziva met his gaze with reluctance afraid of what she would see. The honesty was there as was something else she didn't want to recognize something that reminded her of something Gibbs had said not too long ago. "I am Tony, more than I would have thought possible especially for someone like me."

Tony bit hard on the inside of his cheek, unable to stop himself he grasped her other arm forcing her to look at him. "What does that mean?"

Ziva looked down at the floor. "The life I have lived Tony, I have many sins to atone for. Before.." Ziva swallowed hard biting back Gibbs' name through sheer force of will. "Until now I thought perhaps I did not deserve more, better."

Tony cursed softly. "I hope to hell this guy has taught you better than that."

Ziva smiled finally able to meet his gaze. "He has and that is how i know he would never betray me."

Tony looked down at her feeling the truth of her words and only then did he release her. "Don't forget it Ziva. Your past whatever happened before don't let it taint what you have now. Never let it make you think you're not worthy of something beautiful now." he couldn't watch her as he spoke had to stare at the glass at anything but her. "It'll cost you more than you know if you do."

Ziva wanted to ask what he meant, sensed he was hurting and yet couldn't reach out to him. He'd thrown up a wall even as he'd offered her comfort. Instead she took a deep breath and stepped out of the room.

Tony stared into the interrogation room watching as Gibbs stepped in. His gaze flicked toward Tony full of questions, and an understanding that told him he'd heard at least part of he and Ziva's conversation.

Shaking his head Tony rubbed the back of his neck and left the room. Before he could reach his desk he gave himself a sharp head-slap for good measure.

Gibbs escorted the grieving woman onto an elevator and took a long look at Tony. As if on cue the younger man caught his gaze and tried to hide a frown. Gibbs had heard the entire conversation Tony and Ziva had shared. The whole damn thing had thrown him off guard, still had him slightly off kilter. He should let it go, but found he couldn't. With a nod Tony was walking toward him.

"Boss?" Tony was no fool he knew what Gibbs wanted but that didn't stop the hairs on the back of his neck from itching.

"Let's grab coffee." Gibbs motioned to McGee they'd be back stepping onto the elevator knowing he would have to tread very carefully.

Ziva stood outside autopsy, watching Ducky work through a stack of papers. Her hands shifted nervously in her pockets and her stomach flip-flopped as she thought about what she was going to do. Palmer wasn't in today for that she was thankful but still she eyed the room carefully looking for anyone she might have missed.

Ducky glanced up as Ziva stepped into autopsy, he watched her gaze size up the room and only when it was to her satisfaction did she turn her attention to him. She shifted into the chair across from him for a long time those dark brown eyes carefully watched him, then she bit her lip and everything that was confident about Ziva slid away. Suddenly he was faced with her looking far more unsure than he had ever seen before.

"How much can I trust you Ducky?" Ziva saw the faintest bit of hurt cross his gaze when she asked but pushed aside the urge to comfort him. Her child's safety came first starting now. Once she explained he would understand.

Ducky took in a breath knowing if she had to ask whatever she'd come to him with was big. "I can't answer that for you dear. I can only tell you that any secrets you share with me will go no further." Somehow that was the right answer, the stiffness in her shoulders eased slightly and she smiled.

Tony felt Gibbs watching him as they walked while they drank their coffee. Gibbs was mulling over his conversation with Ziva that much Tony knew. He just wasn't sure why Gibbs gave a damn. Of course that was a lie; Gibbs was perceptive and had been asking far too many leading questions lately. Staring into his cup he wished for a strong shot of something in it.

"Are you in love with Ziva Tony?" Gibbs watched Tony start so abruptly he nearly spilled coffee on himself.

Tony couldn't have been more shocked if Gibbs had stood on his head. That wasn't the question he'd expected. Gibbs stayed out of people's personal life, usually. He couldn't meet his gaze for longer than he would have liked when he finally did there was no smile in Gibbs' eyes. "Where did that come from?"

Gibbs saw all of Tony's tells, the hand in the hair, the nervous drumming of his fingers against his coffee cup, it almost made him smile, almost. "I'm no fool Tony. I heard you two talking. I've watched you with her lately."

Tony raised an eyebrow. "Didn't know I was that interesting. If you're worried about a sexual harassment suit I do know how to behave myself Gibbs."

Gibbs did smile then, Tony was a talker but at the heart of the man he was noble, honest and good. All the reasons Gibbs had chosen him for his team. "Worried about you Tony."

Tony felt the second shock of the day hit him like a brick and again he had to look away. "I'm always good Gibbs. Besides as we can all see she's very taken. I might be seen as a player Gibbs but I don't tread in other men's territory."

"Never thought you would." Gibbs stared off into the distance for a moment.

"Why do you care Gibbs? You don't normally, get personal." Tony felt his skin itch with something his radar was picking up but he couldn't yet recognize.

Ziva stood up pacing a few steps before she started to speak. "You know I am seeing someone, yes?"

Ducky grinned. "The rumors have been quite comprehensive Ziva." He watched her smile so full of emotion he was forced to walk up next to her and stand against the autopsy table with her. "The general consensus is he makes you happy. I can see from your face it's true. So why are you here dear."

Ziva met his face square with her own, "I am pregnant Ducky and the more people who know the more danger I could be in."

Gibbs had more answers than he could share with Tony, "Don't have that many friends Tony don't want to see you hurt." The words were bit out roughly. Gibbs didn't share emotions well.

Tony sighed deeply. "Yeah me neither. Look doesn't matter what I feel or don't feel. If it weren't for ghost man." He watched Gibbs' mouth quirk at the nickname "There's still rule 12. Not to mention Ziva's one of those few friends I have so…"

Ducky heard Ziva's announcement despite the fact she barely whispered it. "I see." He went quiet for a moment before continuing. "Is it simply your job you are worried about Ziva?"

Ziva shook her head "I wish it were that simple Ducky. I cannot share with you all the reasons why I have my concerns only tell you the danger is very real. I cannot tell you who the father is, and no one can know. I have to be able to work for as long as possible, and yet now I have to worry about a baby." She stumbled over the word yet again.

"I don't mean to be dense dear but then why are you telling me?" she smiled only this time it held a hint of pain.

"It has come to my attention that my current doctor is not someone I can trust. I believe he is reporting back to my Father. It is a long story I will explain sometime else. Add to that any doctor I chose to go to would want to file insurance paperwork." Ziva shoved her hands back in her pockets. "Even that is too much of a risk."

Ducky was a smart man, he caught onto what she was hoping for without having to be asked. "You want me to help you with the baby." He smiled wide then "well that's a fine solution my dear. Not perfect mind you as I'm not an OB but for starters yes it's a fine solution indeed." He saw her own smile break free. "You might not know this but in my younger days….."

Gibbs internally flinched at Tony's reminder of rule 12 but managed not to let it show. "So you just pretend it isn't there and keep going. Been there myself it only works for so long Tony."

"You and your mystery lady right?" he watched Gibbs look away step back into emotions he wasn't comfortable sharing.

"Exactly." Gibbs saw Tony smirk. "What's that look for."

"Just you ,thinking about her, if you could see your face. Didn't know sniper's could smile like that." Tony had to admit he was jealous two of his closest friends had found something he might always be searching for.

"Oh shut up." Gibbs tossed his now empty coffee cup into the trash as they approached NCIS.

"Hey you started it." Gibbs head-slapped him and he felt decidedly better.

Ziva felt as though some of the heaviness on her shoulders had lifted after her conversation with Ducky. They had worked out the beginnings of a plan and for now it was enough, she could breathe again. When she approached her desk Tony and Gibbs were laughing about something and for just a moment things seemed almost normal again.

Ziva was happy with the plan she and Ducky had come up with. She was healthy, in good shape and at least for now it was the only safe solution. Gibbs however liked things done a certain way. How he would view the arrangement she couldn't know. Looking down at her plate she realized she'd made quick work of her dinner already. It took only a few minutes to clean up after herself and it hit her then that she was bored. She almost laughed out loud. It had been a long time since she was bored. She pulled out the tablet Gibbs had given her and amused herself by looking at nursery furniture. Staring at her house she wondered where she and Gibbs would be at when the baby came. Would they still be living apart, would anyone know the baby was his? The questions caused an ache in her chest she didn't like. The thought of him not being able to acknowledge his child hurt more than she would have thought. A drop of moisture hit her hand and it hit her she was crying. Shaking her head she pushed the thoughts out of her head and pushed off the couch. She was not going to let the what-ifs torment her. There were far too many of them. She'd known for the most part what she was getting into when Gibbs had come to her that first night. However things turned out she was still a damn lucky woman.

Ziva heard a whisper of sound, acting on instinct she pulled her gun and aimed toward the sound. It took only a heartbeat for it to register that it was Gibb. Hands raised to show her he wasn't a threat Ziva took a breath and holstered her weapon. "I am sorry. I thought you would be going home after your dinner with Fornel and I did not know it was so late already."

Gibbs saw the tense set of her shoulders and the redness in her eyes but gave her a minute before he asked the why. "Fornel had to cancel, work called. I know we said I would stay away again tonight but I changed my mind decided to come by anyways, did some shopping first." Gibbs walked back toward the kitchen and grabbed the bag he'd dropped there. Handing it over he heard her sniffle and had to bite back his concern.

Ziva grinned reaching into the bag, She pulled out a soft stuffed elephant. It had floppy ears and a raised trunk that made it look as though it were smiling. "It is adorable." She smiled up at him and saw him shuffle a bit in place.

Gibbs saw her face morph into one of those smiles that never failed to make his heart skip a beat. "Paid a kid to run to a store and get it for me. Worth it."

Ziva rubbed the soft toy against her cheek and pulled in a long breath. "It does not seem fully real yet. I know I have said that before but this makes it tangible somehow. Thank you."

"My baby too Ziva, you're not in this alone." Gibbs saw her tuck herself into the couch snuggling the stuffed animal and saw just the faintest hint of uncertainty on her face. "Why were you crying Ziva?"

He saw her flush unable to meet his gaze and he sank down next to her. It took her a few moments to answer.

"Well the short answer is hormones, Jethro." Ziva bit her lip and worried the elephant's ear.

"And the long answer." Gibbs took her hand in his stilling the nervous fingers and letting his hand trace her bracelet.

"I was looking at baby furniture, and that led me to thinking about, how much stuff I was going to need, and that led me to wonder where we would be when he or she is born. As in where would we be living, where would be at with our relationship, was I going to need two cribs, etc. It gets a little fuzzy after that. Ha-ha" She grinned over at him.

Gibbs didn't laugh, he wanted to if nothing else to lighten the mood but his frustration was too much. "We can end the case now Ziva, back out. We were never officially assigned it, I'll tell Vance we're done, retire and you can move in."

Ziva knew her mouth dropped open, thought for the briefest second that he might have been teasing her but the look on his face told her he was dead serious. "Jethro I had a moment. My hormones really are a mess. It is okay."

"It's not okay Ziva I pulled you into all this and now…."

"And now we have each other and the baby. On one hand I should probably look for any way out of this case. But we've talked about the risks and as long as it's possible we should do what we can to solve the case. If things get riskier we can change the way we do things. But I was not asking you to fix things Jethro. I just needed to get the thoughts out. I was not asking you to ask me to move in I already know how you feel about me. We will find a way to make this work. One thing I know you are good at is making things work." Ziva took his hand in hers tracing callouses she so loved. "I am sorry I pulled a gun on you."

Gibbs grinned against her ear. "Knew it would happen sooner or later, not worried about it." Gently he nipped at the delicate skin behind her ear. "It's kinda hot." He heard her giggle

"That is…" Ziva felt him pulling her further down into the couch.

"Wrong, yeah I know but with you Zi, I don't have any interest in being right."


	22. What We Keep Hidden

_Because I was overly tired when I posted this chapter I missed a few errors in the conversation between Gibbs and Abby. I had been rereading my fic and confused this scene with another. The errors have been fixed to fit the story and timeline. Thanks for reading and reviewing. You all make my day!_

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"Got something you want to tell me Ziva?" Gibbs had watched her glance over to him then look away more than once as they ate breakfast. She was munching toast and pineapple, how that could possibly settle her stomach he couldn't say. Somehow though it was working to take away the greenish cast she'd woken up with.

Ziva smiled stared longingly at his coffee before taking a sip of her tea. "Ducky knows I am pregnant"

Gibbs digested that bit of information carefully. Their secret hadn't been as carefully kept as he might have liked. Mike, Abby and now Ducky….it worried him what the possible consequences of these people knowing might be. He pushed past the nagging reminder that Holly Snow knew they were something as well. "Rule four Zi."

Ziva smiled as she took a sip of her tea. "True. Mike knows yes. But I do not count him since he is in Mexico if anyone knows how to keep a secret it is him, plus he knows about us but not about the baby. I told Ducky I was pregnant and for my own reasons needed his help to keep it quiet. But, he does not know you are the father." Something close to anger slipped across his face as she spoke, but was quickly gone. "Abby doesn't even know everything."

Gibbs shook his head and grinned. "Thought this one out have you Zi?" he sighed clearing the dishes, trying not to let the frustration of the whole situation get to him. The semantics of what she said held true but didn't take away the risk. The more people who knew the more the case was in jeopardy. Again he considered calling it off and again he knew they just weren't there yet. "Was there some reason in particular you didn't talk to me about this first?"

Ziva moved to stand next to him, wrapping her hands around his waist and letting her head rest against his chest. "I could say rule eighteen but honestly I just did it. I thought about it yesterday after we interrogated the wife, at this point there is no safer option." She felt him nod against the top of her head.

"What did he say?"

"He was happy for me, did not ask question I would not want to answer. We set up a schedule to start with. Basic visits, he gave me a list of vitamins to add to what I already take, how to eat and such."

Gibbs glanced at his watch cursing the fact they needed to leave and soon. "We need to talk about this more Ziva and we should go to Haven tonight." He wanted to make some progress on the case, needed to move past the stagnant point they were at. He looked at Ziva for a long moment taking in the soft black slacks, loose fitting grey top; hair pulled up into an intricate knot and wished again for more time. "You look beautiful Ziva, going to be very hard to stop thinking about taking you into an empty office today."

Any lingering nausea Ziva had felt was pushed fast away when he used _that_ voice. His hand grasped her wrists gently locking them behind her. The motion pressed her tighter against him, leaving no doubt his body wanted exactly what his words said. "I would welcome such a thing Neshama."

Gibbs, let his finger run along the scrollwork of her bracelet, trying to find the control to stop from laying her on the kitchen table. His fingers moved to the buttons on her blouse just as his phone rang. The flash of disappointment on her face was felt by him as well. Flipping open his cell phone he traced a finger in the hollow of her breasts the top hinted at. "Gibbs" he listened to Tony on the other end, leaning in and pressing kisses where his hand had been moments before. She hadn't moved, not even her hands just held perfectly still waiting for him to do whatever he would with her. It was damn liberating. Would have been more so if Tony's words hadn't meant being late wasn't an option. "I'll pick up Ziva if she hasn't left for work yet meet you guys there."

Gibbs closed the phone and stepped back from her. Still she remained exactly as he'd placed her, had they been role playing her eyes would have been downcast waiting for a command. Instead her gaze met his squarely telegraphing her need, and that was so much sweeter. "Work calls." That quickly she became Ziva David the Agent, it was startling and he wondered if she saw much the same in him.

"Was that Tony?" Ziva gathered her coat and purse, shutting off lights as they made their way through her house.

"Yeah the business manager for Lara's apartment is back in town." It hadn't been his first choice to wait to search her apartment. His first choice had been to break the door down and get it done. But as McGee had pointed out there was something to be gained from having someone watch the apartment that evening until the manager returned from out of town and could open the apartment without damage. McGee hadn't known he was volunteering for the overnight stakeout when he'd made the suggestion. Gibbs grinned; he liked keeping people on their toes.

GZGZGZGZGZGZGZGZG

"Not what I would expect a mistress's house to look like." McGee stared at the simply furnished house and decided he'd expected something more…red.

"What exactly does a mistress's house look like McGee?" Tony took photos of each room hoping to spot something helpful.

McGee looked up to see his three team members watching him with amusement. "I don't know I just didn't expect…"

"The suburban?" Ziva saw Gibbs grin and heard Tony chuckle.

"The suberbs Ziva we drive suburban's." He watched her roll her eyes and go back to lifting prints.

"I knew what you meant Ziva and yeah. I guess I thought people with secrets would have more exciting everything." McGee had just finished boxing up the desktop computer when he saw something that made him pause. "Anyone find a laptop?"

Ziva found Gibbs' glance ever so quickly when McGee spoke but his find turned both their attention back to him.

The consensus of No's had him shaking his head.

"What's up McGeek too much to fathom that someone might own only one computer?" Tony laughed when McGee frowned at him.

"She's got a cooling pad."

"Not everyone likes it hot probie." Tony heard Gibbs chuckle and smiled at the win.

"For a laptop Tony a cooling pad for a laptop, If she doesn't own a laptop why would she have one?"

Gibbs walked over to where McGee was staring at the device and nodded. "Nice catch, not even dusty means it's used often." Gibbs looked around "Start looking it's likely somewhere around here."

"It will be a smaller laptop, at least if we're going by the size of the cooling pad."

Gibbs gave Tony a look when he opened his mouth. "Not the time DiNozzo."

Tony shook his head and closed his mouth, going back to taking photographs. Nobody argued with the boss, even if he did have to work hard to bite back a zinger.

For the next few minutes the team spent their time searching throughout the house for anything not obvious. Ziva was looking through Lara's closet trying to figure out what didn't look right.

"Find something Ziva?" Gibbs stepped into the closet careful to maintain the work distance they kept. It wasn't easy when he thought of just how sick she'd been only hours ago. Morning sickness was playing hell with her.

Ziva didn't miss the concern in his eyes but didn't answer it. "I see something but I do not know what, do you understand what I mean?"

Gibbs nodded and followed her gaze. She was staring at the floor of the closet going from left to right. He knew she'd figured it out when she smiled and knelt down.

"This box that her shoes sit on, it looks slightly out of place and the shoes on it are not like the others." She touched the box lifting one corner slowly and found it lifted off the ground easily. Still she moved it ever so slowly watching for wires or anything indicating a trap.

Gibbs laid a hand gently on her shoulder, "Easy Ziva." he watched her nod take the extension mirror he handed her and tuck it under the box.

"It is clear." she handed the mirror back to Gibbs and removed the box completely. The laptop sat there as though it had just been waiting to be found. "She is an interior decorator, why would she need to hide her laptop?"

Gibbs watched her move the laptop and set it on the nightstand by the bed. Gibbs called McGee over as Ziva lifted it off the ground and set on the night stand by the bed. "We all have secrets Ziva hers just might have gotten her killed. Her gaze found his saying all the things she couldn't out loud. Clearing his throat he signaled for Tony to step over and take photos. "McGee, we found it."

McGee looked the laptop over and found a locking mechanism built into the side. Without the right key the unit would at the very least not power on. If she had been really computer savvy it could even erase the contents of hard drive. He could recover it but it would be a lot less work if he didn't have to.

"This needs a key for access, so any you find should go back to NCIS." McGee slipped the laptop into his backpack.

Within twenty minutes they'd found everything they could and were loading up to head back to headquarters.

Ziva moved to ride with DiNozzo only to have Gibbs wave her toward him. "Ziva you're with me."

Ziva slid into the car, for a moment her stomach swirled and she had to take short shallow breaths for a moment. Gibbs slid into the car next to her looking at her in concern. "I am fine, the nausea is just annoying."

Gibbs smiled and pulled the car away from the cur. "You looked a little green again, that's why I had you ride with me."

She nodded and took a sip of water from the bottle she carried. "It comes and goes, which I have read is normal."

Gibbs nodded. "Shannon told me she was sick a lot until about 14 weeks. After that it was all about the food." He smiled at the memory of trying to keep her appetite satisfied. Where those thoughts took him made him smile until he remembered Ziva watching him.

Ziva saw a smile she knew well, rather than feeling any jealousy she took pride in the fact he felt comfortable enough with her remember Shannon in a way that made him happy. "That is a lot longer to feel like this than I would like, but at least I know there is an end in sight. Thank you for sharing that."

Gibbs heard the honesty in her voice and felt lucky that Ziva didn't hold any animosity toward his memories of his family.

"Jethro something is wrong." Ziva looked in the rearview mirror saw DiNozzo and McGee behind them coming to abrupt stop as a vehicle slid in front of them. Gibbs saw it as she did and made a lightning fast u-turn.

DiNozzo hadn't expected trouble, which of course when it usually happened. The black SUV slamming to a stop in front of their car made him swear. Slamming on the brakes he brought the car to a stop just shy of hitting the SUV. McGee had almost drawn his weapon when the two men jumped out guns of their own pointed at the windshield. In unison He and McGee raised their hands. "This can't be good."

""Looks like that stakeout was pointless." McGee watched the men make their way separately to his and Tony's windows. The one at his opened the door and held out a hand.

"Laptop now!"

McGee wanted to argue looked at Tony and out the windshield as Gibbs came barreling toward them. Then he heard the cocking of the trigger.

"Laptop now, last request."

"Give it to them probie." Tony knew these guys weren't messing around, they could hear the other car approaching and rather than looking nervous they looked far more determined through the eyeholes of the black ski masks.

Reaching down slowly to the floor where his backpack sat and pulled out a slim line laptop. Still moving slowly he handed it over to the man.

Tony watched as the two men hauled ass back into the SUV just as Gibbs and Ziva reached them. From the window the two men aimed in opposite directions. He and McGee dove below the windshield as they began firing. The squeal of tires and lack of pain had them sitting up just as quickly.

"They were aiming for our tires Tony."

Gibbs had watched in slow motion as the two men jumped in their vehicle and began shooting. The gun aimed his and Ziva's direction had made his blood run cold. He'd barely come to a stop when the shooting began. Before he could touch the brake Ziva was perched on the window aiming back at the SUV ahead of them. Rapid fire she shot again and again until the SUV had driven far enough away there was no longer a point.

Turning to him Ziva grimaced. "I believe I hit one of them and did some damage to the vehicle but obviously not enough."

Gibbs nodded trying to push down emotions he couldn't voice. He heard Tony's speaking and felt a surge of relief.

"Gibbs you and Ziva okay?" The slow easy way Ziva extracted herself form the car answered most of his question. Physically Gibbs looked fine as well but on his face was a fury Tony couldn't understand.

"We're good Dinozzo. You, McGee?" He wanted to haul Ziva over to him and ensure for himself what her nod had told him but he bit the inside of his cheek instead. Holding himself in check wasn't an easy battle.

"All good here boss. They knew about the laptop and wanted it bad." McGee looked around them at the gathering crowd.

"I had him hand it over Gibbs, they weren't going to give us time to stall." Tony saw Gibbs anger increase two fold.

"It was the right call. Tells us that whatever was on it is probably why she was killed." Gibbs slammed his hand against the hood of their now useless vehicle.

McGee heard the sirens headed their way and smiled. "I gave them mine boss."

Gibbs cocked his head at McGee. "What?"

"I had stashed Laura's laptop in the backseat. I carry my personal laptop with me in my backpack. I use it during lunch, whatever." Shaking his head to keep from going off track McGee continued. "I took a chance they knew there was a laptop but not what it looked like specifically. So I gave them mine instead.

Gibbs smiled. "Well that was damn good thinking McGee. For that I just might buy lunch."

Lunch never happened though. The hours of red tape and paperwork overwhelmed them all; lunch was a hastily eaten snack from the vending machine while they coordinated with the local PD to explain a shootout in the outskirts of town. It was edging closer to dinnertime and things were slowing down. Abby and McGee had been going over the computer they had retrieved since they'd returned to NCIS. Finally they could all breathe just a bit easier.

Tony had been theorizing about what they would find on the computer the bad guys wanted so badly. "Secrets are a dangerous thing. And if it was a laptop, I'm guessing a money trail or blackmail material. Pictures, video something along those lines."

Gibbs watched from the corner of his eye as Ziva froze in her seat as Tony spoke. The same thought had obviously crossed her mind. If Lara and Simon had indeed been members of Haven the possibility of what tapes they could have was unsettling. Gibbs felt a sweat break out on the back of his neck, watched Ziva turn slightly green again and hoped to hell the admiral and the counsel had kept a secure hold on the tape with his and Ziva's moment at the Gala. His phone rang and when Abby announced she had found something he had to take a deep breath before passing that information on to Tony and Ziva.

"Looks like Abby has something, I'm heading down to her lab. Keep processing her papers." Gibbs saw Ziva silently question if she should follow him but with a barely there nod he dismissed the notion.

As usual when he stepped in Abby's lab the music was overly loud, and Abby was making fast work of a caf-pow. The only surprise was McGee was nowhere to be found. "What happened to McGee?"

Abby bit her lip not wanting McGee to get in trouble but knowing Gibbs wouldn't be really mad. "His girlfriend called something was up so he stepped out to take her call." The last thing Abby had expected was to see relief in Gibbs' eyes it surprised her so much she didn't have time to comment before he was speaking again.

"What you got Abbs?" Gibbs sipped his coffee trying not to show his concern over her answer.

Abby used the mouse to click on the last file she had been viewing. "I've got hot and heavy stuff. Lots and lots of couples having a lot of sex, our girl was definitely doing things she shouldn't have been. My guess would be that she was using her job as an interior decorator to blackmail people. She would have had access to their homes, and from the angle of these videos, the ability to place cameras pretty much wherever she wanted."

Gibbs ignored the way his blood ran cold, tried to stop his hand from clenching his coffee so hard he bent the cup, instead he nodded. "So it's possible Lara and the Lieutenant were killed by someone she was blackmailing?"

Abby bounced in her platform boots, ponytails swinging as she did so. "That would be my guess at this point. But I'm telling you the suspect list is long. There are a lot of files on here, she's been doing this for a while and McGee and I have only gotten through the files from two years ago so far."

Gibbs watched as Abby pulled up a folder that when clicked on came up with a screen full of video thumbnails. There were too many to count at a glance all with names and date as filenames. The potential ramifications of what she was saying had him unable to speak.

Abby watched Gibbs watching the screen, trying to read the look on his face. Normally she had a good idea what was going on in his head. In this moment his face was unreadable. It wasn't till he spoke that she felt a shiver of fear run down her spine.

"Any names you recognize Abbs." He hadn't wanted to ask, but the words had slipped out. He was counting on the trust he'd built with Abby over the years and the fact that she knew what was at stake. He could have pretended it was just a casual inquiry but Abby was far too smart to see the question for anything other than what it was.

The questions pouring through Abby's mind at Gibbs' simple question had her stone cold silent. She didn't bounce, didn't move just watched him watching her. The tentative trust so carefully offered couldn't be missed nor could the weight of what that question revealed. When his eyes moved away from hers and he took a long swallow of coffee she turned back to the computer. "Some government people, possibly a few semi-famous people but so far no one you would know." She could almost feel Gibbs relief, the oppressive cloud that had descended on the room lifted as quickly as it had come. She looked at him trying to convey her concern.

"I'm going to finish the rest of this up myself tonight, compile a list of suspects while I do. I'm sure McGee would like to have some time off." He almost objected, she watched his mouth actually open and then close.

"Thanks Abbs" he wanted to say more, she deserved more of an explanation than he could give her but she just stepped up and kissed him on the cheek.

"It's all good. I didn't have any plans tonight anyways." Abby saw McGee stepping back into her lab.

Gibbs turned to McGee working hard to keep his voice neutral. "Go home McGee you haven't slept since yesterday, you took the stakeout. Abby tells me she can handle the rest of what needs doing. Just be here first thing in the morning." Gibbs found a smile when McGee looked shocked. It would have been the right choice even if it hadn't benefitted him, McGee looked beyond tired and would function better on a full night's sleep. "Don't make me say it twice."

McGee didn't have to be told twice, he double checked Abby had everything she needed and bailed fast.

Abby glanced around despite the fact she knew they were alone before speaking. "How are you two managing?"

Gibbs was caught off guard by her question. It was the first time Abby had asked him about Ziva and him. They hadn't had much of a chance to talk at all lately.

Abby had almost laughed at the surprise on his face when she'd asked, "Are you okay?"

Gibbs had fully expected that question. Abby always worried about him, watched out for him, even if she did brush it off as just who she was it still meant something to him. "I'm good Abbs, more than good. It's an adjustment though."

Abby nodded, then turned back to the computer as the faint hint of awkwardness filtered in between them. "Hang in there Gibbs and don't screw it up."

Gibbs chuckled and it was his turn to lean in and kiss her forehead. "Thanks Abbs, for all of it."

Gibbs was again watching Ziva dress when he wanted to be watching her undress. Despite working late a visit to Haven was necessary. After their visit to the dead woman's apartment and the theft of the laptop, it would be interesting to see what sort of reception they would receive. She had slid into a pair of panties and matching bra just as he came up behind her.

Ziva stared at her body in the mirror, it was early but she could see the subtle changes. As Gibbs had pointed out her breasts had grown, pushing tighter against her bras. Her skin was more sensitive even as he ran a rather innocent touch across her arm, her enter body responded. As he stood behind her one hand tracing her spine she couldn't stop her head from falling back against his shoulder. "That feels good Jethro but if you continue we will not make it to Haven tonight." His smile reflecting back at her from the mirror told her he wouldn't mind. Then his hand slid around her waist to rest on her stomach.

"Do you see me differently Neshama?" she met his gaze squarely in the mirror. "I have heard that a lot of men see pregnant women as less than attractive, even before they get bigger."

Gibbs pulled her tighter against him. "I don't know about other men Ziva, but I know that nothing about you could be less than attractive to me. Do I see you differently yes, how could I not. You carry my child I can't imagine knowing that and not seeing you differently. But when I look at you especially right now as I'm touching you and you respond so easily. I see all the ways I want to make love to you, all the things we haven't done, tried or experienced yet. That hasn't changed. In no way are less sexy, less desirable or less wanted."

Ziva felt her body respond as hind hand slid to caress her hipbone. "Thank you Jethro. And thank you today for not reacting how I know you wanted to after the shooting. I know you still have things you wish to say and yet you have held back." His hand gripped her hip even tighter, that simple gesture betraying how very carefully he walked the edge of control.

Gibbs had bitten back all the things he'd wanted to say because they would have come out in angry uncontrolled rush she didn't deserve. Even now as she waited, watched him he wasn't certain he could say anything without making her angry. Despite wanting to hold her he stepped away needing the space between them.

"I couldn't breathe Ziva. I watched the bullets flying around you, saw them aiming those damn guns at you and it was all I could do not to turn that car around and drive you somewhere safe." He paced, clenching and unclenching his fists feeling the same chest tightening terror he had earlier. "You were doing your job I know that. You're good at what you do, I know that too. But watching you hang out that window and hoping to god you didn't….it's not something I ever want or need to see again."

"Are you asking me to leave my Job Jethro?" Ziva heard the pain of loss in his words. It was easy to see that for a moment he'd stepped back in time, was remembering another loss he hadn't been able to stop.

Gibbs felt his head snap up at her question. He hadn't been asking anything. Instead he'd been trapped in the bitter memory of acid-like pain washing over him. The memory of a woman and child he hadn't saved. At first he couldn't answer didn't know how to answer. It was how she waited, quietly, nothing in her expression revealing how she felt about the question. "No Ziva that is not what I am asking. Maybe I'm not a good enough man. I should be asking it, should be demanding it. Yet, my work our work is part of who we are and I can't stop from wanting to save anyone we can." He watched her smile, a slow curving of her lips as she moved back into his arms. Her hand traced his jaw, eyes forcing his to meet hers.

"This is why I love you Neshama, because of this amazing man you are. Your rules, your code the part of you that is bound to always protect and defend, all of those things make you the man I fell in love with. You honor me by trusting me to know when it is too much, when I no longer feel safe in doing my job. I have never met a better man, of that you should have no doubt." She pressed a kiss to the hollow of his neck where his pulse beat fast with unvoiced fear. "I too was scared, it would be a lie to say I was not. All that is now at stake in my life…it…I do not know how to say this….ran in front of my eyes."

"Flashed." Gibbs anchored a hand in her hair, feeling her words crash into him.

"Yes that is what I was trying to say. I saw all that I could lose and it was frightening but at the same time, it forced my focus, made me stronger." When his arms wrapped around her, holding tighter than even their first night together she knew he understood. "I never wish to ever leave you Jethro, I do not wish to lose you either. But even knowing that I cannot believe that either of us could be anything other than who we are."

Gibbs felt joy burn in his throat alongside the fear that had almost dissipated. There were so many things he wanted to say, so many eloquent words that fought in his mind to be spoken. In the end all he could do was whisper against her mouth. _"Mine." _


	23. A Step in the Right Direction

"We talked about this before Neshama. It is a reasonable way for us to draw attention to ourselves. Perhaps draw out whoever is taking these couples. We do not know for sure that Lara and Simon were members of Haven; we can assume but have found no proof yet. But so far we are just another face in the pond." She heard him grumble and clench the steering wheel.

"It's face in the crowd or fish in the pond Zi." Gibbs didn't apologize for his rough tone this time. Ziva wanted them to be noticed, it was necessary to move faster than ever now. He glanced at her bracelet, thought of that part of their relationship being public and had to swallow hard.

"Jethro are you worried people will think less of you because of the man you are?" They had pulled into the gates of Haven and found a parking spot. For a moment she thought he would not answer her, even more he stepped out of the car without saying a word.

Gibbs opened her door, helping her out he tried not to notice the way the deep blue of her dress hugged every curve and twirled around her knees. Pressing her against the door of the car he rested a hand on her hip and grasped her wrist with the other. "I don't give a damn what other people think Ziva. I care what you think." He had to look away, indulged the urge to kiss her neck. "I worry that it will make you uncomfortable…."

Ziva laughed softly biting her lip as there in the darkened garage he trailed gentle biting kisses along her shoulder. "Being yours makes me proud Jethro." He looked back to her a shower of desire falling in his eyes before it was quickly hidden. "I think Jethro that it turns you on, the idea of being able to claim me as yours regardless of who is watching. I don't think you like hiding this part of you. This dominate, powerful man is begging to be recognized, to be let out, that perhaps it is not enough to just share him with me in private." Her words fueled that flame of desire to light again in his eyes. It was like watching something untamed and wild. She wet her lips trying to breathe as her body responded.

Gibbs would always wonder how she could read him so well, how she could know exactly what he wanted at any given moment. "I wanted to control this need Ziva, to keep this thing between us special."

Ziva felt his body straining urgently against her had to bite her lip to keep from begging him to take her right then and there. "What we have _is_ special nothing can change that. If we did not have the jobs we do I would not be bothered by the whole world knowing. And for the record I like you uncontrolled."

Gibbs felt her honesty the depth of her understanding lodge deep in his soul. He couldn't hold back any longer his hand slid beneath her dress finding her slick with need. He growled out a curse yet gently let his fingers thrust and glide inside her. He wanted her need walking the razors edge just as his was. Only when she was nearly crying out did he slide his fingers away.

Ziva almost died when he ended his gentle thrusting leaving her wanting and short of breath. It almost undid her when he took those same fingers and brushed them still damp against her lower lip. Following his fingers with her eyes as they made their way in his mouth just before he kissed her.

Tasting Ziva was far more intoxicating than any liquor he'd had. Tasting her this way was almost enough to make him throw caution to the wind and take her right there against the car. "Beautiful Ziva, how I love you."

"Yours Jethro, always."

They entered the third Haven in the area. It was larger than the other two, and decadence dripped everywhere. At their morning breakfast they'd read about a formal dinner to be held. Hoping it would draw out more people they'd decided the visit was another opportunity to see what they could stir up.

Gibbs led her into the ballroom holding her hand tightly in his. She'd helped him dress sliding his formal clothing on in a way that had almost not let them leave. With each button she'd slipped into place she'd placed a kiss to the skin underneath. It was a breathtaking way to get dressed. His hand wrapped in Ziva's clenched hard when he saw the large number of people in the room. He wasn't a fan of crowds; he liked open space, easily visible exits and the ability to move easily. He saw the crowd unsettle Ziva as well.

"Tonight you stay where I can see you Ziva, no further." His voice loud enough to be heard by anyone listening caught the attention of a few of the men around them. His tone was clear demanding testing the waters, testing Ziva.

Ziva felt the balm of Gibbs' request touch every part of her. He had not been loud but neither had he been quiet more than a few people had heard. It had drawn attention just as they had suspected. She smiled "Yes, Jethro." Around her wrist his hand tightened stroked gently.

Gibbs led them to a free table waited till she had sat to do the same. Just as they'd finished getting comfortable a waiter arrived.

"Sir, Ma'am May I bring you anything."

Gibbs gave the waiter only the briefest acknowledgment "Scotch and sparkling water." The waiter nodded and moved away.

"Jethro?" Ziva felt the tension coming off of him in waves.

"We are getting a lot of attention already. Makes me nervous." Gibbs watched her lips twitch.

"Is that not what we want?" She kept her words a whisper in his ear as they watched the crowd for people they knew.

"Yeah, just…unsettling." Gibbs caught sight of the Admiral, shared a nod and knew they would be talking later. The hair on the back of his neck stood up even as he tried to subtly figure out why. Next to him Ziva's gently caress of the skin at his neck changed becoming less fluid and more strained. She'd felt it too.

"Not everyone watching us is thrilled to see us here." Ziva tried to gauge the room, decipher which faces were friendly and which were not.

Their drinks arrived and Gibbs was grateful for the kick of alcohol to help him focus. "My guess is that having NCIS members in their midst is unsettling for them. I don't know if the situation were reversed if I would trust us."

Ziva nodded but could say no more, they'd decided that while in Haven's walls they would closely guard what they said. "We have a right to be here as much as they do."

Gibbs grinned as she steered the conversation into a safer topic. They saw a few other people they recognized. Mostly those they had run into as a result of work. More than he had counted on but none that set off his internal radar. He was nearly ready to ask Ziva to dance when he saw Faith speaking with someone across the room.

"Faith is here Ziva." Underneath his hand he felt her pulse jump, the rapid beat that followed made his own pick-up.

"Gibbs, Ziva never thought I'd see you two here."

Gibbs glanced up failing he knew to hide his annoyance at the interruption. It was even harder when he recognized the man in front of him as someone he truly didn't like. A Chief Petty Officer they had run into during a murder case, he'd commented on how hot one of the dead victims had been. His smile directed at Ziva was as slimy now as it had been then. "Gruber." The man's last name was all he could manage.

Ziva felt those same hairs on the back of her neck again. Alec Gruber was lower than pond scum, good looking yes, but he knew it and he was a pig. When they'd met he'd been referring to a dead woman as stacked, then he'd proceeded to flirt with her. The very memory made her skin crawl. "Hello Alec."

"You've got a few people here wondering, surprised even, never figured you two would be a thing." Alec was having a hard time picturing the couple in front of him intimate, Ziva needed someone far younger.

Gibbs played his part through sheer force of will. It was revolting to have a conversation with the man but they could get a lot of information if they just played along. "We're just full of surprises."

"I have no doubt." Gruber turned his attention to Ziva "I was wondering if you would dance with me."

Ziva felt her palm grow damp and her stomach rebel but she bit back her refusal. A man like him might just have information they could use. Instead of answering him she turned to Gibbs.

Gibbs wanted to scream Ziva's hand in his was tense holding tightly, but she hadn't refused. Opportunities like this were why they had come to Haven in the first place. She turned to him waiting asking permission with a silent flutter of lashes that even Gruber couldn't miss. "You may." Looking over to Gruber even as he stroked the metal of Ziva's bracelet he fixed him with a hard look. "Just one Gruber."

Gruber found his skin uncomfortable with the weight of that look. He hadn't missed the command in the words or the very clear way Ziva had waited for Gibbs' response before moving from the table. She had clearly been waiting for whatever Gibbs had decided. A willing woman, one that should have been looking at him with those brown eyes not Gibbs. Still he reigned in his thoughts as he led her to the dance floor.

Ziva didn't allow the less than respectable distance Gruber tried for and still managed to keep her smile in place.

"How did you two hook up?" Alec liked the way the crowd was watching them, she looked good next to him.

Ziva frowned at his crass words. "We have been together for some time now. As sometimes happens when you work together." it was a far cry from the true depth of who she and Gibbs were to each other but he deserved no more. "Haven has been …important to us."

"There are some who think you're just here to get information. It was a bit of a surprise that the two of you were allowed to be members." He watched her eyes register surprise. "Some even think you're faking."

Ziva didn't hide the way that statement made her angry. "I could never fake what I feel for Jethro. Here is where we can be together without worry that someone will judge us." Ziva let every bit of her that had been trained to find answers seep through her next words "Unless of course we should be worried?"

Gruber had heard the stories of just how lethal Ziva really was, had brushed them aside as tall tales until those carefully bit out words hit him. He faltered slightly in his steps. "No of course not, we all have secrets here."

Faith approached Gibbs' table cautiously, the dark brooding look worked for him. Still, it made more than a few people around them take notice, especially when you took into account the way he was glaring daggers at the man dancing with Ziva.

Alec tried to move just a bit closer to Ziva and failed again. "Rumor mill has it that you caught an interesting case at work. Something about mummies and gold."

Ziva felt a shiver run down her spine. His question had been phrased to sound casual but his interest was far more than casual. "I do not discuss ongoing cases Gruber, ever." His frustration was not as hidden as he might have liked but she pretended not to notice.

"Sorry just curious," Alec tried to shelve his irritation, tried to ignore the weight of Gibbs' gaze on him. "But you have to admit it's not every day that bodies turn up at the memorial….just makes one wonder."

Ziva offered only a smile and continued dancing. Gruber looked at her with a mixture of lust and frustration when she wouldn't comment further.

Gibbs felt Faith beside him before he saw her, his manners pushed him out of his moment of frustration. Standing he pulled out a chair for her. "Good to see you again Faith."

Faith glanced from Gibbs to the dance floor "He's not a nice guy Gibbs, a real piece of work."

"Yeah I know." Gibbs finally tore his attention away from Gruber and focused on Faith. "Thought we might see you here." It was bold and made her glance away. Gibbs laughed.

Faith looked at him in shock. "He laughs, who would have guessed?"

Gibbs thought for a moment then asked a question that would reveal too much. "Are you here with someone Faith?"

Faith was watching Ziva and Gruber finishing the dance when Gibbs' question made her flush. Ziva saw it glanced from her to Gibbs and smiled.

Ziva was managing with difficulty to keep Gruber's hands in safe places; she was more than grateful when the song trailed off. As she broke away she saw Faith had joined their table. Whatever Gibbs had just said to her had her blushing, Ziva smiled at just what that might be.

"No Gibbs I'm here alone. At present I'm not in a relationship. It's not a requirement of Haven if that's why you were asking." She knew it wasn't but needed time to think.

Gibbs felt a wave relief when Ziva began making her way back to the table. "Not why I asked Faith."

Gruber escorted Ziva back to her table less than pleased by how the dance had gone. Pasting on his best smile he turned to Gibbs. "Back safe and sound as requested. I was hoping perhaps for one more at some point in the evening." Gruber watched as once again Ziva looked to Gibbs waited quietly for his response, command whatever the hell it was she waited ever so silently.

Gibbs had reached his limit and looked from Ziva to Gruber "No." he saw the finality of that sink in with Gruber, the flash of annoyance and reveled in it.

Faith was watching Ziva; her eyes on Gibbs were patient waiting for his answer. Faith was shocked at the understanding of that gesture. Grateful she'd brought her drink to the table with her she took a short sip. Ziva looked at her and smiled again.

Gibbs heard his own sigh of relief when Gruber excused himself. "Jerk" both women laughed at him and he couldn't stop from grinning himself.

"That was less than pleasant. I feel like I need a shower now." Ziva took a long sip of water noticing the look that passed between Gibbs and Faith. "Did I say something wrong again?" her question was directed toward Faith. Gibbs had wrapped his hand around her wrist stroking the bracelet and she saw Faith notice.

Faith answered the only way she could "You in a shower Ziva, nice mental image you gave us there." Faith saw Ziva's eyes flick to Gibbs then back to her desire creeping in.

"Oh." Ziva hadn't expected this tonight, hadn't expected to see Faith. But, she would be lying if she said she hadn't hoped just a little to run into her.

Faith took a sip of her drink, "How are you liking Haven so far."

Gibbs saw the very clear interest in Faith's eyes; saw the way she carefully looked Ziva over. As always Ziva looked beautiful and Faith would have been blind not to notice. "We've only visited a few times. Made use of the arcade, had a few meals trying to get our sealegs."

Ziva grinned "I forced him to play skee-ball until his arm nearly fell off, but he won me the five foot bear I wanted."

Faith laughed. "That's hard to picture, Gibbs doing something so…fun." She shared a smile with Ziva.

Gibbs pushed his glass in a circle. "I can be fun," it was a quietly stubborn protest.

Faith shook her head, grinning "Of that I have no doubt Gibbs, still hard to picture you playing arcade games." Faith was certain Gibbs could be more than fun, as that thought raced through her mind she knew she was going to be in serious trouble if she didn't get some air. "I should let you two enjoy your evening."

As she stood she caught Ziva's look, "Perhaps another time we can have dinner?"

Faith glanced from Gibbs to Ziva and nodded. "I think I'd like that."

Ziva watched Faith walk to the other side of the room, find someone she knew and a conversation that made her smile. After a moment she felt the hairs on the back of her neck rise up again. It could be Gruber or any number of people she had noticed looking at her and Gibbs from the moment they walked in. When she sighed his hand found hers.

"Dance with me Zi." He watched that smile light her face, the one that never failed to make his heart trip out of its normal beat.

"I was waiting for you to ask Jethro." In moments she was wrapped in the familiar scent of Gibbs' arms. The gentle hand at her waist, one holding her hand as he led her across the floor his mouth pressed to her ear she felt cherished. Even here in a place where they both had to be on their guard she felt all that Gibbs was to her, it was moments like this she was reminded how lucky she was.

"Looking pretty serious Zi, you okay?" Her eyes met his and the naked emotion in them almost made him forget where they were.

"I am better than okay Jethro. I was just thinking how lucky I am to love you." Ziva watched his eyes widen, saw the knee-jerk glance around to see who was watching and then his eyes found hers again.

Gibbs felt the stuttering beat of his heart nearly come to a full stop, unable to stop he pressed the softest kiss against her mouth. Before he pulled away he whispered softly. "Thought I was the lucky one." She smiled at him again and he was forced to pull her closer, losing the counted steps of the dance to simply sway with her.

Faith watched Gibbs and Ziva together and wondered how anyone could look at them and believe even for a moment what they shared wasn't real. Out of the corner of her eye she glanced over at Gruber who was barely hiding the animosity he was feeling. He eyed Gibbs with disdain and Ziva with a skin crawling desire. Turning away from him she made her way back toward the bar feeling more than a little envious of the pair on the dance floor.

Gibbs had managed somehow to keep his senses on alert trying to read the feel of the room. It hadn't been easy with Ziva in his arms, but as they danced he felt much of the tension in the room ease. He knew that while it hadn't been their intention the dance had soothed at least a few concerns. As the song ended and he escorted her off the dance floor his phone rang. Glancing at the caller ID he saw it was Abby. Glancing at Ziva he motioned for her to follow and he stepped out of the ballroom to the entryway where it was far quieter. For the sake of anyone watching he put a finger to his lips as he answered.

"Hey Abbs." Gibbs listened almost cursed out loud instead of just in his mind. "Yeah, no I'll head over now."

Gibbs turned to Ziva running a hand through his hair. "Locals found something on the case. Abby said it could wait till morning…"

"But neither of us will sleep if we wait till morning. It is fine Jethro except we cannot show up together and I did not remember to bring a change of clothes." Ziva bit her lip wishing she hadn't forgotten her go bag by the door.

Gibbs tried to hide the frustration all the hiding, secret holding and outright lying they had to do was causing him. "I've got clothes to change into…."

"You should go, I will see if I can get a cab. I can just say I was on a date. That much at least is the truth." She saw Gibbs' hesitation knew what it was about. "Or you could drive me part way and drop me off somewhere and I can grab a cab from there." His look told her exactly what he thought of either of those ideas.

"I'm not leaving you anywhere Ziva until I know how you're getting back to NCIS. You can't drive my car…hell" Glancing at his watch he saw time was fast sliding away. Abby wouldn't wonder if it took him longer than normal to get to her lab but if Tony and McGee showed up before him they would definitely wonder. Turning his attention to the desk at the reception area he ignored his usual reluctance to ask for help and approached the man typing away on the computer. "Excuse me, would it be possible to arrange for a car into town."

"We don't allow cabs into Haven of course, but we have vehicles available at all times. I can have one brought around front immediately." He nodded at Gibbs' thank you.

Ziva felt Gibbs tension as he walked her out the main entrance. "Neshama, do not be upset things happen."

"I don't like just putting you in a car Ziva, doesn't sit well with me." He saw her smile, felt her touch his jaw.

"I will be fine and I will see you in a few minutes, but we cannot change what is." Just then the car pulled up.

Gibbs watched the driver step out assessed him quickly only when he was certain Ziva would have no trouble defending herself should the need arise did he open the door to help her in the car. He caught her grin. "What?"

"Good to know you still have confidence in my abilities, Jethro." She was rewarded when he chuckled. The soft kiss on her cheek eased the loneliness of the door shutting.

Gibbs moved back to the driver. "She needs to get to NCIS headquarters." When the driver didn't blink just offered a quiet "yes sir" and climbed back in the car Gibbs was able to breathe a bit easier.

_Promise the story will pick back up shortly after the next chapter I hope to move time along a bit, but the stories takes me where it wants. Not the other way around. Please review, I love hearing from my readers._


	24. When In Doubt, Find Me

Gibbs headed down to Abby's lab feeling his stomach rolling. A purse and man's wallet had been fished out of the Anacostia, the military ID inside had led the homeless man who'd done the fishing to turn it into the authorities. They local's had called it into NCIS and the items were currently in Abby's lab. On his pedal to the metal drive from Haven to Abby's lab he'd arranged a warm bed and hot meal for the man who'd been hungry enough to consider eating anything he caught from the Anacostia. He stepped off the elevator instantly blasted by Abby's music.

"Gibbs! You remembered my caf-pow." Abby leaned in and kissed him on the cheek.

"Wouldn't forget Abbs." Gibbs heard the sound of Tony and McGee entering the lab apparently they had run into Ziva on the way in.

"Gotta say Ziva you're mystery man sure knows how to treat you right." Tony saw Gibbs and Abby watching their entrance and smirked before continuing. "Just watched Ziva step out of a chauffeur driven car." He whistled and waived his hand at Ziva.

Ziva glared at Tony but smiled when the other three laughed. "It was a date Tony."

McGee snorted briefly and made his way over to Abby. "Heck of a date Ziva."

Tony followed behind McGee missing the look that passed between Gibbs and Ziva.

Abby caught the look and forced herself to look away, sipping on her caf-pow instead. "Behave you guys."

"Hey I was just saying he knows how to do things right." Tony raised an eyebrow. "Wait we didn't interrupt a proposal did we?"

Ziva's smile froze on her face, her stomach tensed and across from her she watched Gibbs react much the same way. The team was watching her and not him which was the only positive in the moment. She had to swallow hard before she could answer, especially when she saw Abby's eyes widen and briefly glance to Gibbs. "No Tony you did not interrupt a proposal."

Tony felt the tension radiating from Ziva, heard the awkward quiet from the rest of the room and felt like an ass. It had been a careless comment but he knew instantly from Ziva's forced smile it had been the last thing he should have said. What bothered him the most was the faint hint of pain that flickered in her eyes. "Sorry Ziva I'm a jerk, please no paperclips." he saw the sadness in her eyes ease a bit but before she could comment he felt the hard smack of Gibbs' hand against the back of his head. "Thanks boss, I deserved that."

Ziva managed a real smile she knew was expected, felt Gibbs watching her but glanced to Abby instead. Abby winked and turned back to her computer.

Gibbs wanted to do more than smack Tony, yet he knew his anger was directed at himself. In his pockets his hands were clenched tight, trying to stop from reaching for Ziva and wrapping her in his arms for his comfort and hers. With much effort he turned to Abby's computer. Behind him Tony and McGee were discussing various things they had caught while fishing themselves. Ziva beside him was silent her eyes flickering to his then away again. He wanted to ask her about that look but Abby clicked on the big screen and the moment was lost.

"So, the purse and the wallets definitely belong to our dead couple. For the most part it's the typical stuff. Make up for her, some receipts I'm trying to recover, birth control that type of stuff. Our Lieutenant had some credit cards; I'm running those and some business cards. But what is really interesting is what they both had in their wallets."

Gibbs stood behind her, hairs on the back of his neck standing at attention. "What is it Abbs?"

"That's the thing Gibbs I don't know what it is. Well I'm guessing it's an ID card of some card but I have no clue for what."

Next to him Gibbs felt Ziva tense up, it wasn't noticed by anyone else but he felt it all the same. "Let's see."

Abby was already pulling out the tray that she'd laid the drying laminated cards on.

Gibbs felt his blood run cold as confirmation of what they had suspected slammed into him. A simple card standard sized each bearing a photo, one for Lara and one for Simon. That in and of itself wasn't what had him and he was sure Ziva feeling the danger that was their world creeping in. It was the symbol embossed on the paper. An eagle wings stretched upward in flight crossed by a carpenters compass. The freemason symbolism couldn't be missed; in the space between the two symbols was a scrolling H. In a similar script a Latin phrase surrounded the whole thing, _post haec moenia est sanctuarium . _

Gibbs had to stop himself from reaching for Ziva's hand through sheer force of will as he spoke. "Behind these walls there is sanctuary." He recognized the words easily he and Ziva carried the same identification.

"Pays to have been an altar boy I guess." Tony took a sip of coffee when Gibbs didn't smile or comment on his joke.

"Figured you would know what that said but I searched it anyways. What's hinky is that no matter how much I search I can't find anything linking these symbols, nothing that gives me any clue to what these ID cards are for. In this day and age with all the social networking I'm surprised to say the least. This is high-grade stuff. The paper is top of line, the lamination done professionally yet I still can't link the card to anything."

Tony leaned in looking at the symbols closer. "My conspiracy spot is itching Boss. It's like we stepped into a Dan Brown novel."

Ziva pretended to think for a minute. "Perhaps it was something between the two of them, a promise of some kind. After all they were having an affair, maybe the quote is in reference to the time they spent in her home." It was a lousy theory Ziva knew it, she even saw Gibbs' lips twitch slightly as he took a sip of coffee.

Abby thought about that for a second. "Not likely, I could see if it was on a keychain or jewelry of some kind, but they wouldn't need the photo if it was just the two of them."

Ziva nodded "Of course you are right, I did not think about that." Ziva felt her head beginning to throb. The long day, lack of rest, and growing baby were testing her endurance.

"You okay Ziva?" Abby saw her grimace and wince.

Ziva felt Gibbs' anxiety. "Just a headache, I think I need to eat. I did not get to eat before I was called here. I am fine."

"Anything else useful Abbs?" Gibbs could have kicked himself, he knew Ziva hadn't eaten since lunchtime.

"Again not much more, I'm going to try to pull something up from the receipts but I think our best bet is anything we can find out on this ID, or whatever it is." Abby took a sip of caf-pow and pointed to the ID. "I almost just told you guys what was found over the phone, but this was something that really needed to be seen. I've got some searches going cross matching the symbols but frankly it's leading me a lot of nowhere. Seriously Gibbs when was the last time we had a case that led us to so many dead ends."

Gibbs stared at the ID's on the big screen hating that he had to lie, cursing the giant mess everything had become. Running a hand through his hair he turned to face his team. As he did Abby handed Ziva a protein bar and he almost hugged her.

"Abby you keep searching on any connection between what we found in her laptop and her wallet." Looping his fingers through his belt he watched a puddle of sawdust fall to the ground. He grinned to himself and saw Ziva look at him in surprise.

"New project Gibbs?" What she really wanted to ask was how he'd managed sawdust as part of their cover.

He threw her a smile, "always working on something." sighing he stared at the screen. "With as little as we have to go on at this point we're left with waiting. Hopefully more evidence will come from somewhere."

He could feel the surprise from his team, but he knew he was right. Nothing new had come up in the past few days and the leads they were working would likely exhaust themselves quickly. He was caught between pushing to find more evidence and stepping back as was needed for what they were trying to achieve undercover. If the person taking and murdering the couples believed they had no leads mistakes might be made. Add to that at this point it wasn't far from the truth.

"I'll keep plugging away at these ID's. If I find anything you'll be the first to know." Abby gave Gibbs her best smile thinking he might just need it in that moment. He smiled back but she saw turmoil in his eyes. She wondered if it was about the case or about Tony's earlier comment.

"Sounds good Abbs. Everybody go home. Tomorrow I 'll let Vance know we're available for another case should one come up." He had to work to keep his gaze from finding Ziva. Something was off in the way she held herself, he wanted to pull her aside and find out right in that moment why she was so unsettled. Gripping the edge of Abby's desk he suspected he knew what it was.

Tony saw the frustration on Gibbs face glanced at McGee and saw he recognized it too. He nodded at McGee knowing what he was thinking.

McGee cleared his throat gaining Gibbs' attention. "Hey boss we'll figure it out we always do."

Gibbs managed a grin even though he didn't feel it. He watched the guys mill around for a bit chatting with Abby. He risked a quick look at Ziva and saw her eyes were carefully fixed on his. Something about her look forced him to look away.

GZGZGZGZGZG

That look in her eye was still haunting him as he stood outside her back door. They were trying harder than ever to maintain the cover of hiding their relationship and there was a risk in coming to her tonight. Tony hadn't failed to recognize that she had been hurt by his comment and it was always possible he would try to stop by and apologize again. He was still wrestling with his thoughts when the door opened and he was face to face with her. Her beauty slammed into him like an aftershock from a bomb. She had changed, the long black nightgown was made of peeka-boo lace that flowed over her. The silver flecked lace covered while revealing at the same time. Her hair fell in long loose curls dancing in the night breeze. Her feet were bare but standing on the step above him gave her a slight height advantage that had him looking up at her.

"Took you longer than I thought to get here Jethro." She smiled; he was holding himself in check, holding back from her. She'd seen the way he'd watched her earlier and had known that he would come to her tonight. It hadn't been part of the plan to spend the night together, it had made the teasing at Haven earlier all the more tempting but after Abby's lab she had known he would come. She also knew why.

Gibbs still made no move to enter her house instead he watched her hovering there in the doorway looking very much like a night fairy, if there was such a thing. He wasn't a fantastical sort of man, reality was absolute but watching her standing there so gracefully beautiful he wouldn't have been at all surprised if she had cast some spell on him. "Glad you knew, wasn't sure I should."

Ziva held out her hand, "Come inside Jethro."

He stepped in shedding his jacket and shoving his hands in his pockets. She didn't offer him coffee as she normally did, didn't do anything other than take his hand and lead him to the bedroom. The need to take her right that second was difficult to push past but somehow he managed. The struggle must have shown on his face because she reached out and touched his jaw.

"You are not the only one who needs Neshama yet you deny us both. I see it in the way you are holding yourself." She was waiting for him to take the first step.

"Wasn't sure you'd want me to." Running a hand through his hair. "At Abby's lab you looked…when he asked about a proposal."

"I know what you think you saw Jethro, why you think you have to hesitate in coming to me." His eyes snapped to hers revealing the faintest hint of fear. He was letting her see it; a man like him was far too good at hiding his emotions for it to be anything other than intentional. The enormity of that had her swallowing hard.

"Tony's question is reasonable Ziva. From where he stands it would be a normal progression." He watched her hike a brow and laugh softly.

"Jethro nothing about our relationship has been normal, not since the start. I would not want it any other way. I have done the typical relationship and it has never made me feel the way being with you has. I think you believe that I was hurt by Tony's question." She watched his hand link with hers and they sat on the edge of her bed. Leaning back against the pillows she felt him tense.

"You are wrong Jethro, which is shocking because you are rarely wrong." She saw that despite himself he almost grinned. "Save the smug for later, I was upset because I knew the comment would bother you."

He looked at her searching to see if she was just saying what she thought would ease his mind. All he saw was truth. "It bothers me that they think the things they do or have. That the man in your life is married, or ashamed of you or that you are not worthy of marrying."

"Do you think me weak Jethro?" The low rumble in his throat could only be described as a growl, it almost made her laugh.

"What the Hell Ziva? You're one of the strongest people I've ever known."

Ziva shifted until she was lying in his arms looking up at him. "Then you know I would never be with a man who is any of those things. If I felt anything other than cherished by you I would not be with you. I love you with everything I am, with all of my soul but even knowing that,… if I felt for even a moment that you did not feel the same I would not be with you." In her hand his fingers tightened almost roughly.

Gibbs felt his breathe whoosh out of him, the stark truth of her words as strong as they were voiced a vulnerability that was equally startling. They came out strong but the barest whisper and towards the end there was the sadness she couldn't hide. "Thank you Ziva." He saw her look at him like he was crazy and stroked back a strand of hair. "For reminding me why I love you, that I have a woman that is my equal. I love you Ziva, more than I can say."

"And I love you Jethro, but I do not need you to marry me to prove it. If and when we both feel that marriage is a step we want to take we will talk about it then. But as I told you before I never want more then you can give." She let her hand rest against his chest feeling the steady beat of his heart beneath her palm. "You are the man I have chosen, it was the easiest choice I have ever made and yet the hardest. I knew you would want all of me that I would never be able to hide anything from you all I ask is you give me the same. That is what I need, that is what I must have from you. I need you the man you are nothing less." As she spoke she let her body slide upwards against his until she was straddling his lap. His instant reaction had her moaning out a sigh.

Gibbs wrapped an arm around her waist as she slid onto his lap. It took his body only seconds to respond to the warm heat pressing against him. As he pressed hard and urgent against her nearly bare skin through his slacks he saw her head fall back into his palm. "It's like this all day Zi, all you have to do is look at me a certain way and I get hard for you. Sometimes I have to think about football plays, count to ten anything to get you off my mind long enough to control myself."

Ziva rolled her neck leisurely till her mouth made contact with the edge of his jaw. "My reaction may not be as visible Jethro but it is just as strong. There are times I think about going into an empty office and taking the edge off until I am with you again."

Gibbs could easily picture her leaned back against a desk, skirt riding high on her thighs hand between her legs. The image burned and ignited his skin taking what was left of his control and throwing it to the wind. He wrapped a hand in her hair and drew her up along with him into a standing position. The movement was slightly rougher than he intended but as he looked in her eyes he saw a flare of pleasure nothing resembling fear. It turned him on ever further the way she responded to his touch even when it wasn't gentle. She stood there silently waiting without having to be told as he undressed.

As always Ziva felt her body hit overdrive when his control slipped. When his dominate nature showed through his movements, her body clenched in anticipation. As he removed his clothing she had to work to even her breathing. She hadn't needed to be told to wait quietly for him to finish, had known from the way he looked at her that he wanted her to watch him.

Gibbs saw in her eyes the way she wanted him, saw the way her eyes hungered across his body. A long slow sweep of lashes down his body scorched him in heat. Moving the half step to close the distance between them he again tangled a hand in her hair, tugging he teased her head back placing a string of kisses down the column of her neck. For a long moment he swirled his tongue in lazy circles along the hollow in her throat. The sweetness of her skin as he slid across to her shoulder forced the gentlest bite on her collarbone. He'd known from the beginning she loved the edge, the sting of his mouth and teeth. Drawing his mouth back up till his lips found hers he thrust his tongue into her mouth. He took her mouth as he intended to take her body. He didn't hold back, didn't soften the need he felt just took with long silken strokes. As he pulled away she was trembling, he could see the way her body shook with need. Just how much that turned him on he could never have verbalized.

Ziva thought for certain she was falling until she felt the surface of the wall behind her. Her mind and body were dizzy from the strength of his kiss. Possession had been stamped in every second of that soul stealing meeting of their mouths. Even as the kiss had ended she had felt the rough bump of the wall behind her, it was rough and cool even through the thin fabric of her gown. Blue eyes fixed hers as she went to touch him, stilling her hand. His hands on her shoulders had the gown puddled at her feet. She was pretty sure she'd heard a tear but couldn't find it in her to care. Her eyes had drifted shut at some point but they flared open when she felt him turn her abruptly. Suddenly his back was against the wall and the hand in her hair was tugging her down towards the ground.

"I want you on your knees Ziva, need your mouth on me." He watched desire rush into her felt the way her skin heated beneath his touch. His demand so blatantly stated had her eagerly lowering herself in front of him. There was a beauty in her submission in the way her eyes never left his, the beauty that she was the one in control even though he'd been the one to command. He'd thought she might tease him but he was left breathless when her mouth slid over him in a glide of satin. His hands tightened on her shoulders, there would be marks tomorrow but the thought barely registered. The long slow slide of her tongue swiping him from base to tip had him questioning if he could hold himself up under the gentle assault.

Ziva savored the heavy weight of Gibbs' hands on her shoulders the way he guided her while thrusting against her mouth. He was so uninhibited hiding nothing he wanted from her. The way his body trembled beneath her touch made her feel powerful. Her own body shook, his taste earthy and spiked with spice she couldn't hold back a moan of pleasure at the feel of him in her mouth. A less than gentle tug on her hair had her rising back up to meet him. She was torn between the loss of him between her lips and the anticipation of having him inside her.

Gibbs nearly lost his war against his control as he stopped her. He'd almost lost himself down the silken path of her throat but he wanted more, didn't want it over that quickly. Her muffled sound of disappointment had him clenching his fists even tighter in the long dark length of her hair. He turned her toward the bed, but with a hand on her hip directed her to remain standing. Reaching into his pants pockets he pulled out a small bundle of satin. It was the softest he could find a brilliant shade of blue and as he unrolled the long strip of fabric he saw her eyes fixate on it. He waited for her to recognize what it was to see her acceptance or denial. She didn't even need to look at him for him to know her answer. The rough rasp of her breath grew even shallower the need nearly shouting at him. When her eyes did find his he wanted to bet his chest in pride at the absolute trust, anticipation even he saw there.

Ziva felt his mouth capture hers and again he poured everything he was into the kiss. It demanded her need, forcing out a cry of desire. He broke the kiss gently, leaving her standing as she knew he wanted her. He circled behind her and ever so carefully grasped first one wrist and then another. Clasping her hands together she heard another low rumble drawn from him. Only a heartbeat after her fingers linked together she felt the delicious whisper of satin wrapping around the delicate skin of her wrists. The fabric was warm still from being in his pocket, and it warmed further as it was woven around her skin.

Gibbs watched his hand shake from the amount of control required to work the fine fabric around her wrists. With deliberate movements he anchored the fabric with a knot. The satin locked against her skin with an abrupt bump on her skin. From behind her he watched her head fall back, a gasp fall from her mouth and her breasts sway from the deep breath she took. Pulling less than gently on her hair his mouth found the sweet spot just behind her ear. "_Mine_"

Ziva felt her whole body shake with passion, barely able to stand, a tear forced its way from her eye streaking down her cheek against her will. The strength of that word so intimate, so theirs, told her everything about how much she meant to him. That starkly uttered word was better than any sonnet, any declaration of love, even more than any vow. When she again opened her eyes he was standing in front of her, watching her.

Gibbs didn't question the tear that silvered its way down her cheek. He felt the same soul deep sense of rightness. This woman was his, would always be his, it amazed him every time he felt the truth of it. They didn't need to speak the moment spoke everything for them. Stepping forward he let his body slide against hers his hand reached behind pulling on the length of satin left loose and pulled gently. She bowed against him and with a hand on her waist he slid inside her sinking fully inside her in one full stroke.

Ziva wasn't sure how she managed to stay standing; perhaps he was holding her up and she didn't even know it. She'd expected him to work a tease of touches, dragging the moment out in a sensual torture. Instead he'd claimed her body with dominating finesse with only a shift of hips. She called out and it wasn't quiet bordering on a scream she felt him continue with a series of strokes that speared deep. Her body contracted around him snaring tight, dragging silken muscles across his cock. His own desire ripped from his throat against her neck. Somehow she found the support of the wall behind her but she couldn't remember moving. It should have been uncomfortable her hands behind her the wall pressed up against her. Instead all she felt was the satin around her wrists the steel of him inside her and the rush of heat flaming across her body.

Gibbs watched a thin layer of sweat sparkle across her skin and kissed at the salty sweetness of it. He guided her legs around his hips, pressed his palm against the flatness of her stomach. The secret between them, the secrets they kept every day made the moment so much more and when she shattered around him he couldn't help but follow. White hot fire streaked around them, he felt it beneath her skin, racing under his, her lips whispered _Neshama _again and again as though a prayer. Finally it was all too much and the collapsed together on the bed. Pressed together, hearts beating in time they simply breathed.


	25. Reality,Truth, Illusions

_Some surprises in this chapter. Hopefully good ones, and hopefully everyone is still enjoying the story. Review if you can. _

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It had been two weeks since Gibbs had put the mummy case on hold. Two long weeks that had allowed them to close two other cases and visit Haven three more times. And yet they still didn't know anything new. They were making friends at the various Haven locations and if the vibes they felt sometimes were accurate perhaps a few enemies. Ziva shared Gibbs' frustration that they were essentially nowhere. But this Saturday morning her frustration had shifted to something altogether different, her clothes. At just over ten weeks pregnant her body's changes were just starting to become noticeable unless you watched her try to get dressed.

As she had planned she'd shifted her style from form fitting jeans and shirts to looser cargo pants and tops. That had been fine until she'd realized she was wearing the same few shirts all the time. Which was why on this Saturday morning, she was at a shopping mall an hour's drive from home. Gibbs had offered to come with her but she'd decided to enjoy some time on her own. He'd nodded and with a mysterious smile said he had a project to work on anyways. She knew that meant a day spent in his basement and she made a note to bring him home more beer.

She'd almost put off the shopping, the past two weeks hadn't allowed a lot of time for them to spend together. The cases they'd worked had kept them busy and a few times Tony had dropped in on Gibbs unexpectedly. Gibbs didn't mind and neither did she but having him walk in on them would have led to far too many questions. She'd spent time with Abby and with Ducky. She'd met with him twice to run blood tests and get a baseline weight. Ducky had informed her that healthy pregnant women needed only basic care and from all the reading she'd done she'd decided that the least amount of intervention during her pregnancy was the choice she wanted to make. She had laughed telling Ducky that he was much like a midwife, believing in the less is more approach. Tomorrow Ducky planned to come to her house and try and listen for the heartbeat, at around twenty weeks she would have an ultrasound. For now though she was healthy but growing out of her clothes.

The lingerie store had been her first stop. She'd seriously indulged, buying new bras and underwear that while comfortable were still sinfully sexy. She'd even thrown in a few new nightgowns that would grow with her. Her curves especially her breasts were fascinating to Gibbs, he would spend a fair amount of time tracing them with his hands and eyes. Her stomach showed just the hint of a curve but he kissed it every chance he got. The thought brought a smile to her face; if the guys knew just how sweet he was he'd never live it down. She was still smiling as she nearly ran into a woman she recognized all too well.

Ziva didn't bother to hide her shock, instead she watched it mirrored in the other woman's blue eyes. "Jeanne, I'm sorry I didn't see you." She watched Jeanne swallow quickly and then oddly enough smile back at her.

"Hello Ziva, I didn't see you either." Jeanne felt a shiver run down her spine, how did she want to handle this? Ziva was a formidable woman and the sight of her brought back painful memories but seeing her was also an opportunity.

Jeanne's response was far friendlier than Ziva would have expected, in fact seeing her at all was unexpected. "You are back in the area then?" she would have thought Jeanne would excuse herself and leave yet the other woman watched her closely seemingly unable to walk away.

Jeanne took in a deep breath knowing she could lie, but also knowing that wasn't why she'd come back. "Yes, for a little while at least. I don't know how long I'll be staying." She fiddled with her purse strap, switched the bag in her hand to the other, stalling until finally she looked at Ziva and spoke again. "Can we talk?"

Ziva knew whatever Jeanne wanted to discuss would involve Tony, it wouldn't be an easy conversation and one Tony might not appreciate but there was something in Jeanne's demeanor that had her nodding yes. "We could get something to eat." She gestured to the café attached to the mall just a few yards away.

Jeanne glanced over then back to Ziva, "That would work."

In moments they were seated and had placed their orders. Ziva watched Jeanne take a nervous sip of her water, then play with her napkin until finally she looked up at her. "My father was not a good man."

To anyone not watching Jeanne's face the statement would have bordered on the ridiculous. But, Ziva was watching her and she saw the depth of that comment. It was that somewhere in the past few years Jeanne had registered just how bad her father had been what kind of man he had truly been. That truth had finally sunk in and she'd accepted it. "Yes he was, because of him many people died and more." Jeanne nodded at her, eyes free of tears a woman accepting the reality she had fought against before.

Jeanne had taken far too long to understand what her father was and it had cost her. "Have you ever lied to someone Ziva for a case, because of your work?" She had to wait for Ziva's answer when their food arrived and she thought perhaps Ziva would ignore her.

Ziva sucked in a breath feeling the pain in the question and at the same time tasting the irony of it. "Yes Jeanne I have, more times than I care to admit. Those lies hurt people, sometimes people I cared for but I knew that my reasons for lying were just and so I accepted that it was what I had to do."

Jeanne picked at her food, digesting instead Ziva's words. "I wrote him a letter telling him he could come to me but…." She stared down at her plate feeling shame "That is why I lashed out at him, one of the reasons anyways."

Ziva knew from her tone that Jeanne wasn't making excuses simply explaining what she had been thinking at the time. "He told me about the letter, he was very drunk and I doubt he remembers that he did but if we are being honest Jeanne you didn't ask him to come back you were trying to punish him. You forced him to choose between his family, his life's work and a woman that yes he loved but he also knew hated him. If you had really loved him you would not have forced him to choose. You wanted him to hurt as you were hurting and he didn't let you."

Ziva's words were brutally truthful and all she could do was nod, when Ziva looked surprised she managed a smile. "I can't deny you're right. It took a long time but the more I learned about my father, about what he'd done and what was required to catch him I knew that I was wrong."

Ziva frowned, "You had every right to be hurt Jeanne you know that, Tony knew that. It was just…"

Jeanne waived a hand in the air. "Yeah, how has he been?"

Ziva knew she was walking the line of trust that came with being Tony's friend but her gut told her to take the risk. "He has changed some since you knew him. He is still funny but also more serious if that makes sense. He is quieter a lot of the time; it is hard to put into words. Why are you asking?"

Jeanne looked at Ziva forcing herself to say the words even though they still hurt to admit. "I miss him. I don't have the right but even now after all this time, I do. It's not something I like admitting especially to you but I came back because I want to see him again. When I ran into you I thought maybe you could tell me how he would react, if I should bother." She shrugged pushing her plate away food barely touched.

Ziva glanced down at her own plate and saw nearly every bite gone, Gibbs would have been thrilled. Sighing she tried to decide what she should say. "It has been a long time Jeanne and I do not know how fair it is for me to talk about Tony behind his back." This time she saw did see tears in Jeanne's eyes, she tried to hide them as she drank from her water glass but they were there. "Why now Jeanne."

Jeanne gave a bitter laugh. "Because it isn't just now, it's been all along. Even when I hated him I still loved him and I spent years trying to get him out of my head out of my heart but I've come to the point that I know I will always love him. Do you have any idea what it's like to love someone like that?

Ziva did know and that was likely the reason she decided to give in a little. "I cannot tell you what to do Jeanne and I will not betray Tony's trust but I will tell you that if I were you I would go to him. I do not know how he will react, we are friends but still." She thought back to the look on his face that day outside the interrogation room. "Do you think you have truly forgiven him for what happened?"

Jeanne thought for a minute on how to answer, the pain still came when she thought of his betrayal but she understood it now, understood even that it was possible he hadn't intended for it to go the way it had. "I don't think forgive is the right word. I think I see he was in an impossible position that he didn't know what to do about. I think he lied that day when I asked him if any of it had been real. Maybe that's just hope on my part but the fact you're willing to talk to me tells me a lot. If he hated me I doubt you'd give me the time of day." She watched Ziva fight a smile briefly but say nothing.

"It is Saturday if we are not working on Saturdays he volunteers at the local youth group teaching basketball. I do not know what he has planned for tomorrow." Jeanne nodded at her.

"Do you plan to tell him you saw me, warn him?"

Ziva had been thinking just what she would do, "I will give you a little time Jeanne but I will not lie should he ask for some reason. Also you should know I do not believe he is dating but I cannot be sure. We all have private lives and we do not always share them." And yet another understatement.

Jeanne felt pain slice through her at the thought of Tony with someone else but it was a reality she had already known was possible. "I know and if he is with someone else then I will wish him well, and at least we'll have a better bit of closure than last time." She gathered her things and stood. "Thank you Ziva. I know you had no reason to talk to me, to even trust me enough to sit down with me but I appreciate it."

Ziva watched her walk away and wondered at the wisdom of not calling Tony, would he be angry when he found out she'd known about Jeanne being in town? All she could do was hope he would understand. She felt her phone vibrate and saw a text from Gibbs.

_Miss you_

She smiled and paid her portion of the check, as she walked out of the café she texted back.

_Miss you too, taking longer than I thought. Dinner tonight? _

His quick reply made her giggle. _I'll warn Tony off dinner is a go, hurry._

_Will do make sure dinner is pizza _ she knew that would make him laugh, an almost obsession with pizza had been a trend lately.

As she walked through the mall she spotted a maternity clothing store. She was far from needing them yet but she wandered in anyways. The mannequins sported gently swelling bellies that made her pull in a breath at the thought of her body growing with Gibbs' child. A soft blue shirt with a cascade of ruffles caught her attention. It reminded her of Gibbs' eyes, making her wonder if their child would have blue eyes. She was so lost in thought she nearly jumped out of her skin when the sales lady cleared her throat to announce her presence.

"Oh I'm sorry I didn't mean to startle you." She took a step back the fierce look on the other woman's face startling her.

Ziva tried smiling even though she was still shaken from being startled; it wasn't like her to be so caught off guard. "No it is okay I was just lost in thought." She'd taken a risk in coming into the store, if anyone from Haven was watching her they would wonder. Luckily there were two pregnant women at NCIS that she was casually friendly with to explain why she would have come in.

"When are you due?" the look of confusion on the dark haired woman's face had the sales lady taking another step back.

Ziva shook her head playing a part, lying when she wanted to shout the truth. "Oh I am not shopping for me but for a few friends. I would like that blouse but I am not done looking." Ziva strolled through the shop, realizing she had made the woman uncomfortable but also knowing it was a necessity. As the saleswoman took the shirt behind the counter she found something she hadn't been looking for at all but it was perfect. It was a band of fabric that went around her stomach allowing her to wear her pants unbuttoned giving her extra room but allowing her to stay covered. If the mannequin was anything to go by it would resemble the popular layered look. She picked out a few in different colors and then added one more blouse. As she approached the counter she saw the woman watching her. "These will be good gifts yes? They are not very close friends but I want them to have something nice." She didn't have to work at being convincing just believed what she was saying. Rule seven was a rule to live by in her line of work.

"Yes, these will be very nice. Would you like them gift wrapped." She saw the woman smile and it was amazing how it changed her face.

"Yes that would be perfect, do you have bows?" Ziva decided the bigger the bows the better anyone watching would be convinced and the second shirt she purchased would indeed be passed on to one of her coworkers, the other had already received a gift from her earlier so the lie would fit should anyone be asked. When the woman was done she left the store carrying a very large bag stuffed with bow laden packages. Glancing at her watch she hurried to the next shop where she would buy what she had actually come for, clothes just slightly larger than what she was wearing now, if she chose carefully they would last her for a while.

Gibbs had been waiting for Ziva until he'd run out of sandpaper. A quick trip to the hardware store had, led into a stop for ice cream which she liked after pizza. He wasn't surprised when he let himself in the house and he heard the sounds of her in the bedroom. Stuffing the ice cream in the freezer, he made his way up the stairs stopping abruptly in the doorway of his room. Ziva stood completely naked in front of the full length mirror he'd bought her a few weeks earlier. Instantly he was aroused, need slammed into him as he watched her hands trace over her skin. It was a damn fine way to come home. He knew what she was seeing, why she looking at her body so carefully. Her worries over the changes were valid, the faster she grew the less time they had. But whenever he looked at her he felt pride in every difference.

"Are you just going to stand there watching me Jethro?" Facing him she recognized he was already aroused.

"Thinking about it, Like watching you, especially when you're doing that." She smiled and reached for the robe at the foot of the bed.

"No." Gibbs felt his body harden even further when her hand instantly stilled and she waited. Stepping close his hand drifted to her stomach, the skin taunt and smooth hiding a precious secret. "You're worried."

The slide of his rough fingertips across her skin had her responding strongly enough she had to work hard to focus on his words. "Yes, only because we have not made any progress."

Gibbs grinned and cradled the barely there curve of her stomach. "I'd say we've made a lot of progress."

She leaned into him, his clothing grazing sensitive nerve endings as it brushed against her skin. "True, but you know what I mean." She watched him slip off his shirt, felt him pull her into his arms making it even more difficult to speak. "I have been thinking that even if my pregnancy does become public knowledge that does not mean we are prevented from working on the case. Everyone knows I am in a relationship they will not be surprised. I will not be able to go out in the field anymore but I doubt that will upset you. As for Haven we cannot know how anyone there will react but it is possible it will not make any difference at all." She knew he assumed it would make her a bigger target but she didn't completely agree.

Gibbs nodded. "Yeah I thought about that too, but Vance will know." He knew she hadn't forgotten that felt her nod her head against his chest. With just a few steps he led them to the bed sliding out of his clothes as she slid between the sheets. He wanted her but he needed to talk to her more, the words weren't coming easy.

"What is it Neshama?" she heard him sigh then shift her until they sat face to face her body wrapped around his. The arousal was there but something even more important read through his body language.

"This goes against everything we've been trying to do and even against my rules but.." he stopped letting his hands play at the softness of her hips. "I want Ducky to know I'm the father." He heard her indrawn breath, felt the shock as it made its way through her. "This isn't a decision I will make without you but, I will tell you why it's so important to me. I didn't tell him about Shannon and Kelly. We've been friends for years and I trust him more than anyone I know except for you. It hurt him when he found out I hadn't shared that part of my life with him. I don't want to make that mistake again."

Ziva smiled letting her fingers tangle with his. "And…"

Gibbs found her warm brown eyes, saw nothing but understanding and continued. "And I want to be part of this with you. I don't want to miss out like I did before."

"Did you think I would object that I wouldn't be happy that this is what you want?" she saw him grin and shake his head.

"No, but it's still a risk."

"It is but one that is well worth it." Glancing down at him she almost held back her next words but needed to know if he felt the same. "I have this feeling that it will not matter soon anyways. My gut says we don't have much longer before people start finding out. I do not intend to tell anyone and I cannot say why I feel this way, it is just a feeling."

Gibbs sighed and held her hands tighter. "Glad I'm not the only one. Been having the same feeling. We'll have to be careful if it happens to keep the knowledge from anyone at Haven."

Ziva laid her body across his content for the moment to listen to his heart beating beneath her cheek. "We will do whatever it takes Jethro, we will find out what has happened to the missing couples, we will find who did it I have faith in our abilities."

He stroked her hair feeling the same confidence she did, his own perhaps strengthened by hers. "From your lips to God's ears Ziva, as long as you stay safe nothing else matters." His arms wrapped around her holding tight.

Ziva felt his love wash over her. "As long as _we _stay safe Jethro you are just as important to me." He nodded against the top of her head clearing his throat and she knew he was trying to reign in the same emotions she was. Rescuing both of them she changed the subject. "I ran into Jeanne Benoit today."

His hand stilled as it was about to delve into the curve of her hip. "Where?"

"The mall I went too. I know how you feel about coincidence but she was too surprised to see me for it to be anything but." He shifted them into a sitting position focusing on her. "She admitted to me she is here because she wants to see Tony."

Gibbs didn't bother to hide the concern he felt but couldn't put into words. "What did you say to her?"

Ziva rubbed her fingers across his palm loving the feel of the callouses, knowing she always would. "She was not sure how Tony would react to her return, if she should see him. I told her if I were her I would make the effort." At his look she took in a breath. "The other day Tony and I were talking and I got the impression he still thinks about her, misses her. I did not tell her that just that I thought it was worth the risk."

Gibbs clenched his hand in her hair; he knew which conversation she was referring to. He suspected that the comment she was thinking about had more to do with how Tony felt for the woman in front of him than Jeanne but he kept that to himself. He knew Tony still missed Jeanne, anyone who knew Tony knew it but still her return made him worry.

"She has changed Jethro from what Tony told us about her I see that she is different." She yawned trying to stifle it with the back of her hand.

"Did you tell Tony?"

"No, I told her I would give her a little time to figure out what she was going to do but that I would not lie either. I did mention where he plays basketball."

Gibbs chuckled at her, and again when she yawned for the second time. "Well then I guess we'll just have to see what happens. Now how about a nap and when we wake up I'll show you just how much I missed you." The lazy nod of agreement was all he needed and together they drifted off to sleep.

Tony dragged the towel across his neck, wiping off the sweat that had gathered there. He high-fived the last of the young men he'd been shooting baskets with and sank into a chair drinking a bottle of water. He took a minute to roll his neck, working out the kinks then leaned back to stare at the park that surrounded the youth center. He would guess that this would be one of the last few Saturdays he'd be able to take the guys outside before the weather turned. Running a hand through his hair he stared off into the distance watching a couple pushing a stroller. Like Ziva's mystery man and Gibbs having a new woman in his life it hurt. He'd been alone a long time, filing any spare time with everything he could not to notice that he was far from having anyone of his own.

It was a sad day when Tony DiNozzo felt sorry for himself yet that was exactly what he was doing. Sitting in a park watching life pass him by, if Gibbs had been there he would have smacked him. Shaking his head he looked up as a shadow passed over him and felt his stomach fall to his knees. He actually broke out in slightly hysterical laughter. He was going crazy, seeing things and thinking about things that didn't exist in his world any more. He was certain he was delusional until she spoke.

"Tony…" Jeanne recognized shock when she saw it; he sat perfectly still watching her like he fully expected her to disappear. When she spoke he blinked and stood up abruptly. It was physically painful to see him again. He looked very much as Ziva had described him the same but not. He seemed bigger as though he was spending more time in the gym than when they'd been together. There was a touch of grey in his hair that hadn't been there before and the lines in his face were slightly deeper. But, still as handsome as she had remembered.

Tony was a man of words, he could fill any silence with any person but now when it mattered all he could manage was her name. "Jeanne?" she moved a step closer to him and he unconsciously stepped back. He wanted to reach out to her, touch her make sure she was actually real instead he reached down and grabbed his bag, twisting the towel in his hands. "What are you doing here Jeanne?"

This was exactly the Tony she'd expected to encounter but still it was a sharp contrast to the man she had known. The one she suspected was more real than his undercover work should have allowed. Pressing her hands together she stayed quiet long enough he was forced to look at her. "I missed you."

Tony dropped his bag, lost his grip much like he thought he might be losing his grip on reality. Her blue eyes threatened tears but she was fighting them. She was standing looking far too beautiful, trying to be strong. He was certain he was going to wake up any second find himself staring at the sky and find out he'd been smacked in the head by a stray shot. To be certain he reached out touched her hair, sliding the strands between his fingers just as he'd gotten into the habit of years ago.

Jeanne couldn't stop the sob that slipped form her throat, knew it startled him when he stepped back again. The loss of his touch even such a simple one made her want to call out his name. Instead, she waited patiently for him to say or do something. She didn't have to wait long in seconds he was staring down at her. "What does that mean Jeanne, you miss me? You want what? Another apology ?" His hands held her arms not hurting her but forcing her to look at him.

"I want to talk Tony, more of an explanation then you gave me, and the truth about what happened between us." She expected more anger instead she watched him close his eyes, heard him sigh harshly.

"Where are you staying?"

She gave him the name of the hotel she was staying at. Felt his hands stroke the skin of her shoulders. She recognized the battle he was fighting with himself; she had fought the same one for a long time.

"Fine, I'll be there at eight." He waited for her to nod in agreement; when she did he let her go, grabbed his bag and walked away. Only when he reached his car did he lock himself in and let the breath he'd been holding in free. Harsh gasps had his head pressed against the seat while he tried desperately to regain some sense of balance. A glance at the clock told him he only had a few short hours to prepare himself to face her again. Forcing himself not to look back towards the park where he'd left her he drove for home wondering if he was brave enough to grab for the second chance seemingly in front of him.


	26. The Past is not the Future

_So some angst for all of you still following this story. Very Shortly Haven and the rest of the case will pick up. I'd originally had one idea and it just wasn't working in my head so I had to go in a different direction. Thank you for all the lovely reviews they really help keep me motivated. _

Tony knocked on the door of the penthouse suite, trying to calm his wayward stomach. Nerves had pitched a tent in the center of his chest and stayed there since he'd looked up to see her in the park. He'd managed to get home get a shower and throw on a suit. In that time he'd done a lot of thinking. Seeing Jeanne had him tied up in knots he knew why and it wasn't pretty.

Jeanne opened the door the smile on her face only slightly forced. As she looked at him she knew the night wasn't going to end the way she wanted. "Come in."

Tony stepped inside noticing she'd worn a dress that had been a favorite of his. There had been a time he'd slid the zipper of that dress down, tasting the skin of her back the whole way. Now, he only shoved his hands in his pockets and tried for a smile that was close to genuine. "Hello Jeanne."

"Thank you for coming tonight Tony, I know you were surprised to see me." She walked toward the bar and began pouring a drink.

"Just coffee Jeanne." He saw her hand still, saw the tensing of her shoulders and then she moved to the other side of the bar and began fixing his coffee.

She hadn't expected the awkwardness, or the way he held himself so carefully away from her. "How have you been?"

Tony approached her slowly, taking the coffee from her. He didn't miss the way her fingers brushed his as she passed him the cup. He was surprised when he barely registered that touch. "I've been good busy. Work is rarely dull, and as you saw I volunteer. Yourself?" his words were stilted as if they were only casual acquaintances and she noticed.

Jeanne felt pain lance through her midsection, an echo of what she had felt the day she stepped onto the elevator thinking she would never see him again. She wondered now if it would have been best if she hadn't. "I'm better than I was. I'm not working right now but I'm help with various charities, relief work and the like." Taking a deep breath and a sip of the drink in her hand she finally found him meeting her gaze. "I came back because I wanted to see you Tony but I'm getting the feeling you aren't happy to see me." It hurt to admit it but she was here for the truth at the very least.

Tony ran a hand through his hair, pacing for a full thirty seconds before he could answer. "I am happy to see you Jeanne. I'm glad you're doing well, that you've managed to get past everything…"

"What makes you think I've gotten past all of it?" He smiled and that too hurt.

"You wouldn't be here otherwise." He swallowed hard and in resignation sat down at the small table in the room. "I remember how we left things."

"I was angry, hurt…" reluctantly she sat across from him, hating the distance he put between them not just by sitting but with his words.

Tony sighed "You had a right to be Jeanne. It started out as a job; I truly never meant to become as involved as I did. With my job it happens sometimes that we have to play a role become someone we aren't. Getting to your father was imperative, I'm sorry if that hurts you but it's true, it had to be done. You were a last resort that no one wanted to go to. It was supposed to stay simple, but as Tony DiNardo I let too much of Tony DiNozzo come through. It wasn't fair and it wasn't right for either of us." He saw her tears carefully held in but just barely.

"Did you really love me Tony, I asked you before if any of it was real but I want you to answer me again." She flicked away a tear annoyed that she couldn't stay as strong as she wanted.

"A lot of it was real Jeanne and that's why I lied that day. If I had told you the truth it would have hurt more." He saw the anger in her eyes understood it and accepted it as his due.

"If you had told me the truth, we could have gotten past it had a chance." He was shaking his head again and again and she had the insane urge to slap him.

"No Jeanne we couldn't have. We would have tried, maybe even succeeded for a while but eventually how we started would have reared its ugly head. Today in the park I knew why you came back and for a few minutes I thought maybe this was a second chance for us."

Jeanne couldn't sit anymore had to force herself up from the table putting space between them so she could breathe. "And now?"

"After a little time to get used to seeing you again I know it isn't." he wanted to soften his words but she deserved his honesty as stark as it was more. "It would be the same as back then, we'd always have what happened haunting us. No matter how much you have accepted what your father was, what I had to do, things I should have done differently…" he broke off standing as well but moving to stare out her window, "I can see that you've changed, can tell that somewhere in the years you've accepted those things but that doesn't change what was. We would have to fight our past every minute of every day."

Jeanne shook her head mutely denying what he was saying until finally she found her voice again. "You're right Tony I've accepted what you did what had to be done in order to stop my Father."

Tony rubbed a hand on the back of his neck wishing he could give her what she wanted. "This suite Jeanne, how are you paying for it? Was it money left to you upon your father's death?" he watched her flinch and felt her shock as much as she did.

Jeanne hadn't expected that question, not even for a moment. It took her a full minute before she could compose herself enough to answer. "It's just money Tony. Where it comes from doesn't matter. I have the ability to help charities everywhere. I do good with the money, I would think that would matter."

Tony nodded, "It does but at the same time I know how that money came to be at what cost. I've seen too much, know too much…..I can't go back Jeanne."

Jeanne couldn't have hurt more if he'd slapped her. "If this is about his money…"

"No Jeanne it's about me and the fact I've moved on. For a long time I wished you would come back, imagined what it would be like to have you back. The reality is I don't love you anymore." It was the hardest thing he'd ever done to say the words. Harder still to watch her reaction to those words but the last thing he would do was lie to her again.

Jeanne knew she was crying, hated that she couldn't hide even that from him. She wanted to hate him just as much but it was easy to see that he was hurting too. It would have been easy to scream at him view him as the bad guy but for the first time since she'd met him he was being completely honest with both of them. The irony of that revelation was that it just showcased how right he was. That this was the first piece of honesty between them proved it couldn't work. "I understand." She wiped away a few tears, holding up her hand when he stepped just a bit closer. "Thank you."

Tony swung his eyes up to meet hers. "I really am sorry Jeanne, for all of it. For lying to you, hurting you and now."

Somehow she managed a smile that was at least partly genuine. "No, it's okay. I came back because I hoped we could make it work, because I missed you but standing here now I think you're right. I ran into Ziva today while I was shopping…" she watched his surprise, the tilt of his head as he tried to understand the coincidence and something else that made her chest hurt. "We talked for a few minutes, don't worry she didn't say anything she shouldn't have. I just wanted to know if I should even bother talking to you. She simply said I had to talk to you." She watched his shoulders tense, his entire body language changed as though everything about him were suddenly on alert. What that meant hurt more than the fact this would be their last goodbye. "I told her even if things didn't work out at least we could have a better good-bye. I hope we can have that."

Tony sighed on a nod. "I wish…" he didn't finish just felt her close the space between them and place a brief kiss against his lips. It was good-bye and it felt like a relief as he stepped back.

Jeanne nodded. "Yeah I know. Good-bye Tony."

Tony walked toward the door turning back with his hand on the knob. "Good-Bye Jeanne." He stepped out shutting the door behind him. Minutes later he was once again in his car trying to keep from driving to another woman's house. He tried to tell himself it was just because he wanted answers but that was a lie. Instead he drove with no destination at all until dawn started to creep into the sky and he was finally tired enough to sleep

GZGZGZGZGZGZ

Ziva had water on for tea, breakfast nearly ready and the table set for three. The last part making her the most nervous, Ducky liked to meet in the mornings and that was fine with her. She suspected he liked her cooking and it flattered her. Glancing at her watch she saw he could arrive any time so when Gibbs stepped out of the bathroom brushing his teeth she waived him back.

Gibbs shook his head with a smile and after rinsing his mouth came back out and wrapped her in his arms. "Not much on dramatic entrances Ziva."

Sticking her tongue out at him she pulled out of his arms to drop the tea in the hot water. "It is not that Jethro. I just want to ease into it; he will think he has to make up a reason why he is here if he sees you. I do not want him to feel awkward." As if on cue she heard a knock on the door.

Gibbs nodded. "Fine I'll stay in the kitchen until you call me but make it fast." He couldn't resist smacking her butt as she hustled out of the room laughing at the glare she gave him.

Ziva opened the door trying to hold back her own laughter. "Hello Ducky it is good to see you." She shut the door behind him feeling the nerves she'd held at bay biting at her again.

"Good morning dear, you are looking quite lovely today. And I do believe I smell breakfast."

"Thank you Ducky and of course I have breakfast and tea as well. But first we need to talk." She bit her lip and stuck her hands in her pockets.

"Are you alright Ziva, has something happened?" he set aside his coat and bag stepping toward her.

Ziva saw the alarm on his face and instantly felt bad. "Oh no everything is fine Ducky I am feeling very well. I just wanted to let you know the baby's father is here." She saw his eyebrows raise up and the very real surprise on his face.

"Well that's wonderful. Where is he?"

Gibbs stepped into the room trying to soften the hard set of his jaw, hating how much he wanted Ducky's approval. "Right here Duck."

Ziva watched Ducky turn very slowly towards Gibbs. Despite the seriousness of the situation she couldn't help but notice how Gibbs held himself stiffly as though waiting for Ducky's disapproval.

Ducky wasn't as surprised as the two in the room might have thought. He'd suspected for some time now that Ziva's mystery man was indeed Jethro. A trip down the stairwell behind them one day when they hadn't known he was there had been enlightening. It hadn't been so much what they'd spoken about but how they'd spoken to each other. He'd kept those thoughts to himself even after Ziva had revealed her pregnancy to him. She'd been serious when she'd told him she needed to keep her secret that had been easy to see. Gibbs watched him and Ducky had to smile it was just too funny stoic Gibbs waiting for a reprimand. "Congratulations Jethro."

Ziva saw her favorite smile break out on Gibbs' face watched him and Ducky manage a brief embrace the way only guys could manage. She also noticed that Ducky did not appear as surprised as she would have expected. "You knew?"

Ducky cleared his throat and straightened his shoulders. "Suspected dear but I was not entirely certain."

Gibbs caught Ziva's look and knew she was wondering as well what had given them away. Ushering Ducky into the kitchen he began making his tea. "What gave us away Duck?"

Ziva stood at the stove serving up their breakfast watching Ducky closely. He smiled reassuringly while taking his place at the table.

"You can both relax it was nothing in particular. A trip down the stairs one time, the way you stand in the same room, the way you Jethro spoke about the new woman in your life. To anyone that knows the both of you well enough it was obvious." Ducky watched Gibbs blush another rare sight and blew on his tea to keep from commenting.

Ziva saw Gibbs run a hand through his hair and after setting their plates on the table flicked a stray strand back into place. "I know, I need a haircut, been a little preoccupied."

Ziva smirked as she sat down. "I have no complaints."

"Good to know we aren't being obvious, but it's still important no one knows about us Ducky." Gibbs drank a long swallow of coffee and met the other man's gaze. "It's not just our jobs Ducky, Ziva knows I would retire in a second. There is something else I cannot discuss, another reason why no one can know."

Ducky nodded, "I assumed as much Jethro, yet you told me." He was genuinely surprised.

"Trust you Duck and didn't want to miss out anything." As he reached for his coffee he watched Ziva abruptly depart the table and knew she'd lost the battle with breakfast yet again. He shouldn't have been grinning when the bathroom door slammed but he was.

Ducky saw both Gibbs' concern and his smile. "You know this I'm sure but this will pass and in some ways it's a good sign."

"Yeah it passes but in the meantime it's a real pain in the…." He stopped and chuckled. "How could it possibly be a good thing?"

"There is some antidotal evidence that women who suffer from morning sickness have less risk of miscarriage. It's not always the case but again not a bad thing either. Before you start to worry Ziva is doing well, everything looks fine. The blood tests showed her hormone levels for this stage of pregnancy are just where they should be. And the closer she gets to twelve weeks the lower the risks get."

"Thank you Ducky for doing this for helping us. Not a lot of people we can trust." Ziva finally came back in the kitchen and pointed at him.

"Your child is as troublesome as you are."

Gibbs laughed, and heard Ducky do the same. "You okay?"

"I am fine, I should just learn to not eat until after ten o'clock only then does this child seem to behave." Reaching into a cupboard she grabbed some crackers and munched, moving out of the way when Gibbs cleared the dished from the table.

"Do you really think it's possible we will hear the heartbeat today?" the possibility had her hands shaking slightly with excitement.

Ducky grinned. "We will try my dear, it's a bit early but you are very slim and that helps. If we don't you shouldn't be alarmed. I'll meet you in the living room."

Ziva watched Ducky head into the living room, watched Gibbs start to follow and snagged his hand. "I am glad we decided to tell him, I wanted you here."

Gibbs brushed back her hair tracing the curve of her face. "This is good Ziva and you never waste good." After a brief kiss he led her into the living room.

After a quick check of her blood pressure and pulse, both of which were in normal limits Ziva laid back on her couch and lifted her shirt.

Gibbs watched Ducky squirt clear gel on Ziva's stomach and slide a microphone looking device across her stomach. She jerked slightly but when looked at her she just smiled. "Cold"

Ducky slid the wand around slowly moving low on her abdomen trying to pick up any sound. For the first few minutes he found only hers. Just as he was about to tell her they would have to try again in a few days,the digital readout alerted him the heartbeat he had just picked up was not hers. Raising the volume he watched as both Ziva and Gibbs focused in on the sound.

Ziva saw Gibbs' recognition of the sound filtering through the air before her. The rapid beat like hummingbird wings had them both frozen gazes locked together. "Jethro it's…" she couldn't continue feeling the words trapped in her throat behind a sob of joy.

Gibbs tightened his hand around hers feeling the sting of true happiness in his eyes. "Yeah."

Ducky glanced at the numbers on the digital readout and made a notation in the chart he was compiling for Ziva. When he looked up he found Gibbs watching him. "What do those numbers mean?"

Ducky gave him a reassuring smile. "That is the baby's heart rate and before you ask it is right where it should be." Ducky gave them a few more moments before shutting off the Doppler and handing Ziva a towel to wipe away the remaining gel.

Ziva cleaned her stomach and pulled her shirt back down with less than steady hands. "Thank you Ducky, I do not have the words."

Ducky worked at tucking everything back in his bag trying to hide that he too was affected by being able to share in such a special moment. The quick hug from Ziva made him smile as he gathered up his coat and hat.

Gibbs followed him as he made his way to the door. "You don't have to leave Ducky."

Ducky patted him on the shoulder. "But I do Jethro, I have plans this afternoon and you two will want to be alone. Enjoy the rest of your day."

Gibbs shut the door behind Ducky watching out the window to see if perhaps they were being watched, seeing nothing out of the ordinary he turned back to Ziva. She sat on the couch looking slightly stunned, finding a spot on the ground just to her left he grabbed her hand and held tight.

"You okay?" She looked at him with watery brown eyes and the rush of love he felt made him glad he was sitting down.

"I feel so blessed Jethro, I never thought I would know any of this; you, a baby, right now it seems very hard to believe it is all real." Letting her hands run through his hair the silver strands anchored her to the fact this was her reality. His blue eyes watched hers filled with love and happiness, yet in her own heart she felt an arrow of grief.

Gibbs watched a myriad of emotions play across her eyes but a sudden hint of grief made him watch closer. "Zi?"

Ziva shook her head not wanting to ruin the moment; his fingers on her chin forced the words from her anyways. "How did you survive Jethro? This child isn't even born, I've only just now heard it's heart beating and already I know if anything were to happen I would be devastated, I cannot imagine how….." she stopped herself when her voice broke.

Gibbs felt the familiar ache of grief take him, even stronger when he saw his pain reflected in her. Sliding up next to her he pulled her into his arms. Resting his head atop hers he didn't fight the sadness she so obviously shared with him. "Don't know how to answer that Zi. For a long time after I wasn't really alive, I existed for one purpose, to find the man who had caused their deaths. Even then there were a lot of days; nights I sat with my gun in my hand wishing I had the courage to pull the trigger."

Ziva gasped past the tears running down her face, trying not to let them break into full blown sobs. Even though it had been before she had met him and he was solidly alive behind her the fear of not having him shook her. She couldn't find the words so she simply held onto the lifeline that he was and listened as his rough voice told the story she knew only from speculation in a file.

"After….after I killed Hernandez." He felt the surprise, the way she fit herself closer to him, knew she was shocked he would say it out loud. But saying it, admitting it to her a fellow warrior had a weight lifting off his shoulders. "I drifted couldn't seem to think clearly, still thought about ending it all but after all I'd done I wasn't looking forward to hell. So I just moved through each day, one at a time. Joined NIS did whatever I could to keep from thinking, remembering. Some people keep a shrine; I couldn't…couldn't look at their things. Took a day to pack it all up store it right and then I drank myself sick. Hasn't been since being with you that I've felt anything like the man I was before they died." He felt her face turn into his chest, the moisture of her tears soaking through his shirt made it hard to hold back his own. Together they held each other sharing the grief and the gift of all they were and had been.


	27. When the Ball Starts Rolling

Ryan and Amy Steven's had at one time been a beautiful couple. Coming up on their seventh wedding anniversary Ryan most likely would have planned a special getaway for the two of them to celebrate. Their friends and family had nothing but good things to say about the couple. From everything Gibbs could glean they were happy, faithful to each other and ready to start a family. The only note of discord was from Marine Sergeant Ryan Stevens' commanding officer. Stevens was being investigated for selling secrets. National secrets that as an intelligence officer he had ample access to, of course now he was dead so the only secrets he would be sharing was whatever they could unearth through evidence left behind. This time the two bodies mummified and laid out to be seen had been less of a surprise. The location was as ostentatious as the last time. The George Washington Masonic Memorial, with its high tower and surrounding grounds were no less grand than the monument had been. The bodies placed on either side of the G surrounded by the masonic symbol had been found again by a security guard. Discovered just shy of three days earlier the team was finally making headway on the evidence they had found.

This time they had something to work with. Ziva kept watching a piece of that evidence over and over again. A grainy surveillance tape that provided little yet had captured her attention. The security guard that had called in the bodies had reported to them that a building across the way had security cameras. The angle was bad and from a distance yet it had been enough to give them a place to start. Their suspect was definitely male, and they had a rough height of about 5'8". Aside from that all they knew was that a white panel van with no plates had been used and their suspect knew enough to conceal his identity a baseball cap and dark coveralls had been effective. He had removed the bodies from the van using a hand truck which was simplistic but effective. Gibbs had watched the tape so had Tony and McGee, Abby had run it through various software's and yet it was Ziva that kept watching it seeing something she couldn't place but recognized all the same. What that could mean scared the hell out of him, most likely they had already met the killer.

Ziva felt Gibbs standing behind her as she watched the tape again. She'd lost count how many times she'd run through the brief amount of video and yet something about it forced her to watch. Glancing at the clock she saw that it was late. "I know I should go home." She'd almost said _we_, despite the fact that they had spent very little time alone together in the two weeks since they'd first heard their baby's heartbeat. An overwhelming amount of work had gotten in the way.

"It's late and Abby says she isn't likely to find anything on the print she located." At first they had all been excited and hopeful at Abby's find under the lid of one of the canopic jars. But she'd been running an exhaustive search on said print and come up empty. Whoever had left the print wasn't in any known system or had the skills to remove that information from anywhere he liked. Gibbs glanced over to where Tony and McGee where again reviewing the computer files they had copied form the couple's shared computer. Nothing like what had been found on Laura Fields computer had shown up. From everything they could see if Ryan Steven's had been selling secrets he'd done a damn good job of hiding it.

The only thing that had caused a hint of alarm, though only for him and Ziva was Faith Coleman's name in Ryan Stevens' phone directory. There could be any number of reasons why she'd been in there and Gibbs could easily guess at least a few of those but it still meant an interview with her in the morning. If it hadn't been for a high priority case she'd been involved in it would have been sooner. It wasn't likely to be comfortable for him, Ziva or Faith but then Tony and McGee wouldn't know that. Bringing his attention back to the Ziva he nodded toward Tony and McGee who were approaching them. "We're all tired Ziva. We all need to get more than a few hours of sleep. Maybe we'll think clearer."

Ziva nodded knowing he was right but still frustrated with what she knew she was missing. "I think perhaps you are right."

Tony was just about to suggest a late dinner when Gibbs phone rang. He knew the look and recognized the voice on the other end. Ducky had finished the autopsy and had more answers. Glancing at Ziva and McGee he sighed. "I'll order the pizza."

Gibbs thrust a frustrated hand through his hair. He was tired, all of them were tired but he knew Ziva had to be feeling it most of all. At just over twelve weeks pregnant Ziva's morning sickness had tapered off but the fatigue had intensified. She managed rarely complaining but there were days he sent everyone home earlier than normal. He should have felt guilty about it but he didn't. The past few days had not allowed for such leniency, they all had pushing long hours pushing through the evidence and questioning witnesses.

As they stepped into autopsy it was easy to see she was working hard to fight that fatigue she was hiding a yawn behind her hand. She offered him a tired smile "Ducky says there are difference between these bodies and the last pair."

"Indeed Jethro, these two were cared for in death as well as the last couple however as Ziva said there are notable differences. The basics first though they were in good health, ate a decent meal not long before they died and it appears that Amy was in the early stages of pregnancy." Ducky was grateful he'd had a few minutes alone with Ziva before the rest of the team had arrived. He'd been able to give her the news before anyone else allowing her time to adjust. He'd worried for a moment how Gibbs would react but all he saw was the other man's eyes slide ever so slightly toward her then back to the bodies in front of them. "As with the last couple Jethro the wrapping was linen, the only substances we found were gold dust and powder from latex gloves. Also the same as the couple beforehand they were mummified as closely too ancient traditions as can be achieved in modern times. But I believe I know how they were killed. It's speculation at this point but it looks like poison. I found needle marks at the back of their necks and just like the first couple there was little bruising."

Gibbs nodded. "So it's likely that they were drugged first. Two people one military, well trained and no sign of a struggle has to be something along those lines."

"In our last pair the man had all his medals pinned to his chest, amulets meant to honor had been placed in his wrappings, while the woman had none just the wrappings themselves. This time around it is our female victim that has the amulets in her wrappings and the man, although we know he was a decorated officer I found no amulets or medals." Ducky pointed to an image on the computer screen diagramming where each amulet had been placed.

Ziva frowned and thought for a minute. She must have been too quiet because she heard Gibbs speaking to her.

"Something bugging you Ziva?"

"The Ancient Egyptians were strong believers in the afterlife. The very act of mummification was to preserve the body for the next life. Perhaps whoever is doing this feels as though they are helping these couples move on to the next life." Ziva fought back another yawn and reached in her backpack for a protein bar. Her appetite lately had shocked her. It seemed as though she was always hungry. "But there is more that is just on the tip of my brain."

"Tongue Ziva." Tony grinned at her.

"My tongue Tony? Do you have a special interest in my tongue?" Ziva watched Tony flush, saw Gibbs grin and smiled back.

"The saying is on the tip of your tongue Ziva." Tony swallowed more coffee wondering when NCIS was going to put a Starbucks in the actual building. "And if this is the bad guy's way of helping I gotta say it's a hell of a way to help people and I'm betting they weren't ready to move on."

Gibbs considered what she said. "Could be."

Ducky nodded and glanced at Ziva who was more tired than he might have liked, thankfully Tony and McGee seemed just as tired so they had no reason to question her fatigue. She drank out of a coffee cup Gibbs had handed her but he knew it held decaf tea and not coffee. "So we know that the killer has to have a large place to work, it has to have power and storage. On hand he will need the various items for mummification. And he will need a place he can work without interruption or risk of discovery. And we know he has the means to transport his victims without being discovered."

McGee nodded. "I've been running a search on any connection or record of purchase of all or any combination of these items. But, as you can imagine it's taking time. I can find one or two in combination but nothing that makes me question the purchases just yet."

Gibbs nodded again and thought back to the conversation he'd had with Tony at the crime scene days earlier.

"_Boss you see the connection right." Tony glanced around using the pencil he was sketching with to point to the tower structure of the memorial itself._

_Gibbs saw a lot, more than he let on. Tony liked to show-off and letting him helped him grow as an agent. "Why don't you tell me DiNozzo."_

"_It's Alexandria."_

"_I drove us into Virginia Tony I know where we are." Ziva stepped up in between them listening quietly._

"_As in Alexandria, Egypt boss. Add in the tower was built to resemble the lighthouse of Alexandria. Our bad guy has a real thing for Ancient Egypt. This location, The Washington Memorial, can't have been an accident in his mind there has to be a purpose."_

Gibbs had agreed with Tony even when he'd continued to go on about movies with hidden codes and Templar knights. He believed there was a connection he just couldn't let on to Tony just how deep he thought that connection went. He was glancing at his watch when he heard Ziva take in a deep breath. Everyone heard it; they were all looking at her as she stared at the bodies in front of them without really looking. He recognized the expression on her face knew Tony did as well.

Tony saw the virtual light bulb over Ziva's head turn on. "What is it Ziva?

"The medals and amulets, the killer placed them on the bodies of the partner that had not committed a crime. In our first couple Laura was blackmailing people. Her body held no amulets; she would not have had medals as she was not a soldier but as Ducky pointed out there were no amulets anywhere in her wrappings. In this couple Ryan was the soldier highly decorated, he was the one suspected of selling secrets and his body was free of any amulets or medals. His wife however had many placed throughout her wrappings. " Ziva watched the men around her work their minds around her words and equal expressions of agreement cross their faces.

McGee nodded vigorously "That makes sense in a way. The mummification itself is a sign of remorse. The process is time consuming and rebirth has always been seen as a way to begin anew."

Tony picked up on McGee's train of thought. "So it's possible our killer feels compelled to kill these victims because they are doing wrong but wants to allow them sort of peace."

Gibbs frowned, "What about the fact that Ryan was cheating on his mistress and that she died with him?"

Gibbs almost flushed for no reason when everyone looked at him. Ziva had a smile in her eyes but he couldn't figure out why. He was grateful when McGee picked up the conversation.

"Perhaps our killer is interested in a different type of crime. One that isn't based on morality. It's possible he doesn't see cheating on a spouse in the same way most people do. Or maybe there is a connection between the couples we don't know about yet, one where the blackmail and secret selling could be problematic for our killer." McGee watched Gibbs nod, looking casual as he did so. But, something about the way Gibbs' shoulders stiffened made him wonder.

Gibbs felt the potential accuracy of McGee's make a chill run up his spine. He had to work hard not to look at Ziva. Instead he pushed aside all his concerns to glance once again at his watch. It was nearing midnight and if they all didn't get rest soon they were going to be worthless the next day. "Time to go home everyone." He eyed Ducky. "That means you too. We all need some rest or we won't be productive tomorrow."

Tony let out a long breath. "Amen to that." He grinned tiredly at Gibbs. "Be bright eyed in the morning Boss."

Gibbs nodded and watched McGee nod a quick good-night and follow Tony out of autopsy. When he was sure they were gone he pulled Ziva in his arms letting his head rest against the top of hers simply breathing for a minute. He knew Ducky was watching, but they trusted him with a secret bigger than just their relationship.

Ziva was caught off guard by Gibbs' embrace but it only took her a moment to relax into it. "You are tired." She knew it was more than the fatigue of working long hours it was the secret hanging over them at all times that was truly exhausting.

Gibbs held a moment longer then released her nodding. "Yeah." He gave her a quick look then turned his attention to Ducky. "You still planning on coming on Sunday again?"

Ducky hid his smile, he was seeing Ziva about every two weeks which was more than necessary in a typical pregnancy but it seemed to ease Jethro's mind. "I am, you planning on having breakfast again?"

Ziva laughed "I am. Do you have a request?" she saw his eyes light up and waited.

"Well I do enjoy waffles quite a bit." Ducky enjoyed his visits with Ziva and now Gibbs the food was just an added bonus.

"Then waffles it will be." Ziva stretched her arms and sighed. "I am ready to go home now Jethro if you would not mind." They said a quick goodnight to Ducky and made their way out of NCIS. As they walked to his car he glanced over at her.

Gibbs nodded in agreement. "You need sleep."

"And food." She was nibbling on the last of a power bar but it wasn't what she wanted. He grinned at her and she was forced to look away. "Stop that."

Gibbs bit back his chuckle. "I didn't say anything. But we should stop for real food on the way back to NCIS."

Ziva's eyes lit up. "doughnuts?"

This time he couldn't stop his laughter; unlocking the car he answered her without looking. "I was thinking along the lines of a sandwich but I suppose we could manage doughnuts as well." Her recent craving for sweets was amusing considering how healthy she normally ate.

"I cannot help what I want to eat lately; even the books back me up." She kept her voice low throwing him a smile as she stowed her bag in the back of the car. "You are still worried?"

Gibbs nodded wishing he could pull her in his arms and remind himself she was safe. "More than ever."

In the car heading to an all-night coffee shop Gibbs was far more quiet than she would have expected. "What is it you are reluctant to say Jethro."

He could have worked his way up to the subject but instead he figured he owed her the directness she preferred. "When we went to look at the Stevens' house I had you stay behind with Abby. We haven't talked about that yet. I know we are under the assumption that whoever stole the laptop was most likely connected to the blackmail that was going on. But, we don't know that for sure." He looked over at her had to swallow hard at the gentle way her hand rested on her stomach.

Ziva felt the war of the woman that was now a mother in secret and the warrior she had always been. "It is not likely it will happen again."

Gibbs clenched his hands tight around the steering wheel. "I want to believe that. But my gut told me to have you stay at NCIS. I should have discussed it with you, but there wasn't time." He pulled into the parking lot glanced around out of habit and when she stayed quiet asked the question he feared the answer to. "Are you angry?"

She sighed. "I am not happy about having to stay behind. But I am not angry either. I know why you did it I cannot be unhappy with that." Looking at him she could see frustration one she felt as well. "You are asking that I stay behind from now on aren't you? " He didn't need to answer her verbally she knew from the hard set of his jaw and the frustration in his voice. "I will do as you are asking Jethro and you do not have to feel guilty. However we ended up where we are I have never been happier and nothing matters more to me than our child." The relief in his posture almost had her hormones kicking into overdrive.

"If I could get past this feeling Ziva I wouldn't ask but nothing not even this case is worth risking either of you." He watched her nod and take in a deep breath.

Lowering her voice out of habit she asked a question she already knew the answer to. "Do you believe we still have another couple to find?"

Gibbs heard the tension in her voice. He nodded "Most likely. When Cal and I had a drink last week he didn't say anything about anyone turning up. He also didn't say anything about anyone new going missing." he ran a hand through his hair wondering just how much more complicated this was going to get.

"That is a small amount of luck, could mean whoever did this has it out of his system."

"Or he's gearing up for the next round." His gut had been churning for some time now. Their relationship had stayed secret for all intents and purposes. Things with Haven were going smoothly. Regulars now they'd made a few friends and conversations flowed a bit more freely around them. They had a small list of suspects but none that truly spoke to them. All in all in had been just a bit too easy for what he would have expected. At some point the other shoe had to drop and when it did he was more than worried about what would happen.

"We do not have much longer Jethro, I feel much like I think you do. That the clock is ticking faster before everything is no longer in our control. I do not like feeling this way." His hand found hers and he gave it the briefest contact.

"No matter what Ziva I've got your back. The rest doesn't matter we knew that when I put this on you." He traced the gold of the bracelet that had become so a part of both of them. "Something is bothering you, more than all this. What is it?"

Ziva took a deep breath. "It is the surveillance tape. I cannot say why or what is telling me this but I have seen the man on that tape before. I have ripped my brain…wait racked my brain trying to figure out what it is but I cannot. I am missing something important but I do not know what."

The same shiver of fear that had walked up his spine earlier in the day made another appearance. He'd known that had to be why she watched the tape so intently but hearing her say it out loud made his heart want to stop beating. "I'll keep you safe Ziva, I swear it."

Ziva looked to him letting her see all the confidence she had in him. "We will keep each other safe Neshama, of that I have no doubt."

Gibbs could have said many things in response instead he swallowed past the lump in his throat and followed her into the coffee shop, both dreading and looking forward to the day when they wouldn't have to hide anymore.


End file.
